A Low Down Dirty Shame (1994) Script

Downloaded from YTS.MX Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

♪ Shame ♪

♪ Only love ♪ ♪ Can be the blame ♪

♪ Get the news, I love you ♪ ♪ Shame ♪

♪ Mmm, wouldn't want ♪ ♪ To live with the pain ♪

♪ Gonna stay forever ♪

♪ Back in your arms ♪ ♪ Is where I wanna be ♪

♪ Wanna be ♪

♪ Back in your arms ♪ ♪ That's my heart ♪

♪ Shame ♪

♪ Only love ♪ ♪ Can be the blame ♪

♪ If you lose our love ♪ ♪ It's a shame ♪

♪ I wouldn't wanna live ♪ ♪ With the pain ♪

♪ Girl, it's a shame ♪

♪ Ooh, it's a ♪

♪ Oh, it's a shame ♪

♪ Shame, ohh ♪

♪ It's a shame ♪

♪ Shame ♪

♪ Mama just don't understand ♪

♪ Oh, how I love my man ♪ ♪ Shame ♪

♪ It's a, ohh, ohh ♪

♪ It's a shame ♪ ♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Shame, ohh, ohh ♪

♪ Shame, ohh, ohh ♪ Oh, here we go.

Housekeepin'! Excuse me!

But can you spell, "do not disturb"?

Can you spell "lysol"? Goddamn!

You better check your pulse. You might be dead.


Ooh! Wow!

Work 'im, girl!


All right, go ahead. Get rid of her.

Que pasa? Hey, hey, hey, hey!

Good day, gentlemen.

Nice and easy. Nobody move.

Everybody, one by one, put your guns on the table nice and slow.

What do you want?

Well, I called the psychic hot line today, and the lady with wide nostrils told me I could find wealth and happiness here.

I'll be damned. She was right.

She was.

How much is the insurance company payin' me?

Ten thousand dollars. Ten thousand?

There's over $1 million worth of shit over on that table. I see.

Jack is a lyin' son of a bitch. Mm-hmm.

All right, you go get the car.

You gonna be all right? I'm cool.

'Cause you know I been doin' my karate, and goin' to the gun range and all that.

I can help you out, you know? Get your karate-kickin', gun-range ass in the car... now!

You, over there.

I'm Chun Yung Fat. Do you know what that means? Yeah.

You come with an egg roll and miso soup.

[ Yells in Chinese ]

[ Chinese ]

You boys don't wanna fuck with me.

I just got fired from the post office.

I could flip out and kill everybody in this room.

[ Phone ringing ] You, get that.

[ Ringing ] Yeah?

Let me speak to the big black man with the gun.

One day we will meet again.

Next time bring some breath mints.

It's for you.

Say "aah." Aaaah.

Don't act like it's your first time.

[ Girl ] Shame? Yeah.

Take the stairs. Yo, Shame, you gots company, and lots of it.

They're goin' up the staircase and the elevator on the east and west wing. But check it out.

I'm gonna have a car waitin' for you on the side of the buildin'. All right?

Good lookin' out.

But look, if you need some backup, I got my .22 and my stun gun!

You know, we can wreck shit! Hello? Shame!

You, nice and slow.

Toss those over to me.

Now... if I bend down to pick those up, are you gonna try to kill me?

Come on, be honest.

You're fucking-a right! I'm gonna kill your ass.

[ Groaning ]

You stupid fuck.

Say hi to Arnold.

Oh, shit!

You boys aren't gonna make this easy, are you?


Don't worry. My men'll find him and whack 'im.

I'm gonna personally cut his fuckin' balls off.

What the fuck? You're upstairs.

You, downstairs. He's in the stairwell.

[ Chinese ]

All right, let's go right now.

Don't make me Jack this limo, goddamn it.

All right? Now I told you, he will be here.

Everybody just chill. Just relax.

Don't make me get rowdy. It is not a pretty sight.

Come on, you guys. Follow me.

Oh, my god!

[ Man ] Over there! Quick!

Will you be joining us for lunch, sir?

No, think I'm gonna have mine to go.

[ Man ] There he is!

[ Screaming ]

Whoa-oa-oa! [ Police car siren wailing ]

Was that the police? All right, that is it!

We are going right now. Let's go. Look. Look.

You ain't got a choice but wait.

All right. Now I told you, he'll be right down here.

[ Girl screams ]

Hi, Peaches.

Now, see. I told you. You sittin' up there... Let me have that.

[ Sighs ] Driver, let's go.

[ Tires screeching ]

[ Sirens wailing, tires screeching ]

[ Peaches ] Anyway, let me finish tellin' the story.

She walks out the house, she walks into the street, she doesn't even look where she's goin'.

And then... bam! She got hit by a big-ass truck.


She was in a coma for a week.

Now, you not gonna believe this. What?

Girl, girl, come on, come on with it. What?

She died. Ohh!

Oh, Peaches!

Peaches, don't leave me hangin'.

Pick up the phone. Peaches!

Peaches! What? No, I'm here. I'm here.

[ Sighs ] I mean, this is... I just can't believe this is happenin' to her.

You know what I'm sayin'? 'Cause she's such good people. Mm-hmm.

[ Sighs ] I mean, look at this. This is so sad.

I'm so sorry.

I know this must be tearing you apart.

This is worse than when James died on Good Times. I remember that episode.

Chad, I need to talk to you.

What this old tramp want? [ TV ] It's important, Chad.


I'm pregnant... And it's yours. Oh, no!

Peaches, it's awful. What? Oh, that is it! That is it!

You two-timing, can't-get-enough bastard!

I hope your prostate falls out!

[ Radio: Rap ]

♪ I'm down for whatever ♪ ♪ Hey, I'm down for whatever ♪

♪ I'm down for whatever ♪ ♪ I'm down for whatever ♪

♪ I'm down for whatever ♪ ♪ I'm down for whatever ♪

♪ Ain't that nice ♪ ♪ Down for whatever ♪

♪ Ooo, it's a shame ♪ ♪ What you do to me ♪

[ Rap continues ]

Oh, god. I gotta go. I gotta go! What?

Tell him about my aunt. Both my ears are burned up. What? Now, see.

You need to stop talkin' to me every day.

Get you and Micky Moon some jobs so y'all can get off them county checks, all right?

I ain't on no county checks, all right? Look, just call me later.

All right? Yeah, whatever. That's F.E.M.A. I'm gettin'.

Trippin'! Just lazy!

♪ Here we go ♪ ♪ Here we go ♪ Hey!

♪ Here we go ♪ ♪ Come on, Come on ♪ ♪ Here we go ♪ Good mornin', Shame. How you feelin'?

Hey, Peaches.

You haven't been runnin' up my phone bill, have you? No!

Hey, girl, turn that loud-ass shit down, will you? I cannot do that.

The radio station's having a contest for $10,000.

And today might be my lucky day! Mm-hmm.

Shame, the least you could do is shave. What you talkin' about?

I'm clean. Well, you need to wear a sign that says so.

And why don't you dress up anymore?

Who am I dressin' up for? You?

Maybe if you took better care of yourself, somebody besides me could put up with your ass.

Better watch out. You know I like that freaky shit.

Haven't you ever heard of that expression, "dress for success"?

Yeah, well let's see here. They're gettin' ready to turn off my phone.

They cancelled my credit cards.

'Bout to repossess my car.

I'd say I am dressed for my success. Well, you know what?

You need to go to the bank because they're about to foreclose this place too.

That would make you homeless, office-less, Peaches-less.

So, you tellin' me you wouldn't work for me out of a cardboard box?

Exactly. Mr. Gold dropped this off for you.

See, why you holdin' out, girl?

That's what I been waitin' on.

Let's see here. What the fuck is this?

"The repair to the limousine and the window were not covered, and have been deducted from your fee." Goddamn it!

Yo, Peaches.

That money I owe you? Save it.

Don't worry about it, Shame.

I got a little money saved up, so I should be all right.

You know when I get back on my feet I'm gonna kick you down, right?

[ Door slams shut ] Please. You got some company down there.

Hey, Sonny! What's up, man?

Hey, Shame! [ Laughing ]

Yeah. Gimme one sec. I'll be right there.

[ Shame ] Yo! What's up, Sonny?

Hey, Shame! How ya doin'? Hey, man, look at you.

Lookin' like new money. Check you out.

So how's all the bureaucrats treatin' you in D.C.?

Well, you know, I miss the streets, but, uh, it's a paycheck. [ Clears throat ]

You remember Peaches, don't you?

Hey, Peaches! How ya doin'? I'm hangin' in there.

You still with this bum? Yeah, I'm trying to get into heaven.

And givin' me hell all the way.

Come on in, man. Relax. What can I get you? Something to drink? Soda?

Yeah, yeah. Let me have a soda, and none of that healthy shit you drink.

Get the man a soda, will ya?

Why you frontin'? You know you ain't got no sodas.

You got one in your desk, right? Yes, I have one in my desk.

Well, get the man a soda.

Thank you.

[ Shame ] Have a seat, man.

So tell me, Sonny, what brings you to my neck of the woods?

Shame, how'd you like to work a case with me?

What's the D.E.A. need with me? Not the D.E.A. Me.

This is personal, off-the-record and tailor-made for you.


You got my curiosity.

You remember her?

This a joke? Yeah, I remember her.

She turned him in, Shame.

Six months ago she came into my office and told me.

The man she was living with was Ernesto Mendoza.

And the next day she skipped town.

What is this, Sonny? Mendoza's dead, and you know it, man.

Oh yeah? You sure about that?

I mean, after you shot him, did you check his vitals?

Huh? Or were you like the rest of us, trying to get your ass out of there in one piece?

I mean, think about it, Shame.

What if he's not dead?

What if he changed his face, laid low for a couple of years, and then resurfaced?

Hey! I'm sorry.

You're gonna have to find yourself another guy, Sonny. I ain't with this, man.

Find another guy, my ass!

Mendoza was your prize bull!

We worked five years to infiltrate his organization.

And it ended in a bloodbath, with us on the short end of the stick!

Yeah, that's right.

And I don't need you comin' in here now reminding me about Mexico.

I had my nightmares. That shit is all behind me now, okay?

Oh, yeah?

When's the last time you been out?

When's the last time you had a good time?

Hell, when's the last time you had a date?

Look at yourself, Shame. You look like shit.

You're takin' on suicide jobs just to make a buck.

And what are you? My fuckin' therapist now?


I'm your friend.

He beat you, and I'm givin' you a chance to get even.

How do you know she's even in L.A.?

Surveillance photos at L.A.X. Puts her here...

Two months ago.

Did you run it through the computers?

Every single one. Nothing.

Shame, I've only got three days.

What do you say?

I'll find her in two. Ahh, yes! Yes!

Look, I gotta run, okay?

But if you need anything, I can be reached at this number.

Hey, Sonny? Yeah.

One thing, man. You promise me I'm there when you slap the cuffs on Mendoza.

Under one condition. You name it.

You dress for the occasion. I don't want that son of a bitch to see you like this.

Shit, man. I'll even get a haircut. This is gonna be great!

[ Sonny ] Like the old days! We're gonna nail that fucker!

Call you when I got somethin'. Okay, Shame. Okay. I'll talk to you.

[ Sonny ] Bye, Peaches.

Where do we start?

Well, how 'bout this?

"Covenant"? The only perfume she wears. Very exotic, very expensive... And even more important, very hard to find.

That's the only place in L.A. that sells it.

Now how do you know all this?

I bought her a bottle once for her birthday.

Wait a minute. Hold up.

You mean to tell me that you used to date her?

Why you got to say it like that?

Because you look... No, well, she looks like, you know...

[ Sighs ] Yeah, well, I guess you're right.

We are from two different worlds.

Is that why you two broke up?

No. She left me for another guy.

But anyway, you get to do what you do best today.

I want you to go shoppin'. Check that place out, and a couple of shops in the area.

Buy a few things, ask a few questions, see what you can dig up.

Like what? A sock, a key chain? What?

I mean, in Beverly hills this little bit of change is only gonna buy me some trinkets.

Shit. I know you tryin' to trick me.

Ain't nobody tryin' to trick you. Okay, here.

Look, now! Come on, Peaches! Just give it up, big daddy.

I better not hear you was down at the crenshaw swap meet...

Goin' buck-wild with my money, either.

Hmm. Thank you. Hey, Eddie.

Hell no! No, no, no. What's up, man? Hey, come on.

Look here. Come here, man. Look. I need a file, man.

You got the proper paperwork, brother? Oh, I... paperwork?

I need paperwork now? Yeah. Now, I'm tired of hookin' you up, man.

What you talkin' 'bout? I'm the one that hooks you up, Eddie.

You hook me... When was the last time you hooked me up?

Oh, wha... you forgot about Sheila? Huh?

The one with the nice ass. Did I turn that number over to you?

No, you rolled that number over to me. She was in a wheelchair.

Hey, I ain't sayin' nothin' about her legs, man. What about that acne?

But you hit it though, right? I hit it? Man, what kind of questions you askin' me?

Bet he did... No? Well, uh...

Well, uh...

Yeah, and it was good. It was good, right? [ Mumbling ]

Man, come on back with me. You sick, man. Look, man, I told you.

Don't sleep on the handicap, brother. I did wear the wheels out.

Yo, man. You got a current address on this clown?

Gimme a few days, I'll get it.

No, that's all right. Here. Just do me a favor. Gimme a copy of this.

Take it. Just take it, man. Are you...

You sure? Hey. Just take it. Just take it.

You like theater, right? Oh, yeah. You know, I used to be an actor.

Now, here. I got these from a client.

Take anybody you want. Oh, thanks, Shame.

Thanks for lookin' out, man. I told you I'd hook you up, Eddie.

Thursday at the forum. Okay.

All right, man. Thanks, man.

Okay. Peace, Benny.

Ha-ha-ha! "Gary Coleman is Mr. Bojangles"? Man, what's up with these tickets?

Hey! What the fuck are you doin' here?

I got myself a missing persons case. No shit?

No shit. Oh, and I saw you on TV this mornin'.

You broke that big jewelry heist case all by yourself, huh?

Give it up for the lieutenant. Isn't he somethin', huh?

Hey, hey, hey, knock it off! Back to work!

Get outta here. Come on, get outta here.

I think I see a cape hangin' out your back, man.

Dun-ta-dun look, up in the sky!

It's a bird! It's a plane!

It's a 50-year-old Puerto Rican.

[ Car phone ringing ] Hey, Peaches. What's up?

Come get me on rodeo. Yeah, I know where that is.

Got some info.

I'm close by. I'll meet you there in a minute.

[ Radio ] Here he comes in his drop-top Van kickin' it with his friends about to spin a few n's strike-kickin' it finger-lickin' it not feelin' too quick but you know you're gonna get with this bangin' on your own beat just cookin' some like it we can freak it all night hi.

[ Humming ]

So you like? Let me guess.

Salt-n-Pepa had a garage sale.

You know what, Shame? For somebody to be as smart as you are, you really ain't got no class, okay?

Now let me enlighten you about a few things.

This is "Fremmi." Fremme.

This is "Fremmi" with an "I" not an "E."

Okay? Now they had a designer sale.

So I took advantage. No shit.

Did they throw in a beeper and get-out-of-jail-free card with this outfit?

And just because I am such a thoughtful person, I got you a little somethin' too.

For me?

And those are silk. Silk drawers and a red tie?

Oh, I've got to wear these together. Get off me, ladies!

I hear the ladies screamin' my name. Shame! Shame! Shame!

Leave me alone. Stop tuggin' at my silk drawers.

Don't love me like you do.

Are you makin' fun of me? Hell, yeah. Now, what else did you get?

Well, you were right. She came here about a month ago...

Lookin' for the perfume you were talkin' about, but they didn't have any in stock.

So she left this number with the salesperson, and that PO box for the mailing list.

All right, well, the post office is closed, but first thing in the morning...

I want you to go down there and see what's in this box. Oh, my god. Shame.

Any truth to the evil twin rumor, Jackie? You getting married again?

It is him. It is Chad.

Who? Chad!

[ Confused chatting ] Welcome to the bottom of his heart.

Get outta the way. Move! Move! Beat it! Beat it!

Hey. Chad! Chad from as the heart turns.

That's right, sweetheart. The one and only.

[ Groaning ]

Peaches! That's what you get for doggin' Donna.

Okay? And if you think you're gonna sleep with her sister, I got somethin' else for you.

I will come back for you. Okay?

Don't think that I won't. All right. I'll play that.

You knew better than to pull some trump like that. You better watch your back!

[ "Oye Como Va" ]

[ Continues ]

Bueno, huh? Les gustan esta.

Esperen que ver las chicas, eh?

[ Laughing ]

[ Indistinct Spanish ]

What's up, y'all? Oh, Shame, otra vez.

What is it that you want, huh?

We're trying to have dinner here.

Oh, gee. Thanks for invitin' me, man.

I love Mexican food. You gonna eat this?

Mmm. Delicioso.

What is it that you want, Shame?

Well, I thought maybe we could help each other.

Que cojones de este mayate, eh?

[ Laughing ]

El pollo loco to you too.

What kind of help can you give me, huh?

From what I hear, you're not even a cop anymore.

So why don't you do us all a big favor...

And get the fuck out of here, huh?

Ouch! Luis!

Why you wanna talk to me like that?

Damn! You gonna dis me like that after all these years?

Shit. You know, I knew Luis when he used to sell PCP to school kids.

But now you're on top and I'm not.

That's cool. All I want you to do is deliver a message.

I want you to tell Mendoza that I know he's alive.

And there's no place that he can hide, 'cause I'm gonna be wreckin' shit like a 7.0, and when he falls, his ass is mine.

Now this time... I will not miss.

Probrecito, Shame, huh?

You should've left when you had the chance, amigo.

You know, they sell some stuff on TV you could spray on your head...

And cover your bald spot right up.


Have a seat.

I acaben con el! I acaben con el!

Fuckin' pinche joto!

Okay. You respect my shit, and I'll respect yours.

[ Spanish ]

Buenas noches, shitheads.

[ Slams door shut ]

[ Whistling ]

Hey, Shame!


How many fingers?

[ Laughing ]

You don't look too good.

[ Groaning ]

Let me give you some advice.

Stay out of business... That's not yours.

You keep chasing ghosts, you're gonna end up in a graveyard.

Oiste, carajo.

[ Knock at door ] [ Peaches ] Wait a minute!

[ Knocks continue ] Shoot! Knockin' on my door like that.

Who the hell is it, any goddamn way, this time of night?

Better be Ed McMahon with a lot of money, or else this hoin'.

Must be crazy comin' up here.

[ Unlocks door ]

What happened to you?

I went partying with Rodney King and Reginald Denny.

[ Groans ] I think I'm onto somethin'.

I gotta go see Rothmiller in the morning.

Ohh. Come on.

[ Sighs ]

Okay. Mmm, easy.

Come on now, hold still.

Shame? Hmm?

How come the only time I get to hold you like this...

Is when you're all bloodied and bruised?

Are you comin' on to me? Ow!

Shit! What the fuck was that for?

'Cause you're an asshole, and you shouldn't be makin' fun of me!

You're serious? Yes, I am.

Remember the first time we met?

Yeah, I busted you stuffin' cds in your underwear.

Well, whatever!

I've been feelin' this way since then.

Now, I was only 16 and I knew it wouldn't work, but I'm 22 goin' on 23.

Can't you see how much I've grown since then?

You mean you're not wearin' that trainer no more?

Goddamn it, Shame! Is everything a fuckin' joke to you?

I mean, can't you allow yourself to feel anything?

Come here.

No. Forget you. You're a trip. I ain't comin' over there.

Come on, sit down.

Tsk. Whatever you say.

[ Ice crunching ]


F.Y.I., I have noticed.

I watched you grow from an adorable little girl to a beautiful young lady.

You're smart. You're funny.

You love life.

You're beautiful.

Don't forget sexy.

Very sexy.

Well, what is the problem, Shame?

We have nothing in common.

Oh, now how you gonna sit up there and say somethin' like that?

Well, what about boxin'?

We both love boxin'.

Okay. Who's the greatest heavyweight of all times?

Tyson. Mike Tyson.

Mike Tyson is the greatest heavyweight of all time? That's right.

You tellin' me Mike Tyson could beat Muhammad Ali? That's right.

Mike Tyson can't spell Muhammad Ali.

Oh, what the... Oh, wait a minute, Shame.

Hold that up 'cause Muhammad Ali can't even spell Muhammad Ali.

Did I show you the tapes of Muhammad Ali? Yeah, I saw them tapes.

I'm sayin' them tapes don't mean nothin'.

Shoot. Muhammad Ali dances around the ring so goddamn much, I think I'm watching a rerun of Soul Train.

See now, that's what I'm talkin' about. Oh, darn you.

Well, at least you thought about it.

Yeah, I thought about it.

Well, my roommate won't be home 'til late tonight, so...

The bed is yours if you want.

Now, you sure your roommate ain't gonna freak out when she comes home...

And finds a half-naked man in the bed?

Trust me.

If my roommate comes home and finds a half-naked man in the bed, freaking out is the last thing girlfriend is going to do.

Good night, Shame.

Peaches, I see something has grown since you were 16.

[ Moaning ]

Hey, girl, I hope you don't mind me being here, but Peaches said it would be okay if I crashed in your room tonight.

Mind? No, honey. I never mind comin' home to a warm man in the bed.

Who... who the hell are you?

"Exsqueeze" me. Who am I? This is my room you dropped in last night.

Brother, you better show me some tits or die.

Miss Peaches, you need to come up here and get this Rock Wilder.

Peaches! Okay, okay. Wait a minute. All right.

Shame, this is my roommate, Wayman.

Wayman, this is Shame. Why didn't you tell me your roommate was a guy?

Because you ain't never asked.

Well, what was all this girlfriend stuff all about?

Shame, please! "Girlfriend" is an expression.

Yeah, well excuse me, girlfriend!

But I'm gonna take a hot shower and pretend I didn't wake up in The Crying Game.

[ Peaches ] He is a cutie pie. You gotta read this article, though.

I sure do. This is somethin' else!

[ Sighs ] Good morning.

Good mornin'. Good mornin', Shame.

You lookin' at me like you're gonna take a picture.

[ Laughing ]

[ Laughing continues ] Peaches?

Peaches, why do you read that nonsense?

Because it's informative. Informative?

Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah. Right. Let's see here.

I bet you everything in here is a lie.

"Arsenio hall gets butt reduction."

Ah! Page two.

Got a monkey here named bobo that gets tax tips from aliens.

Real informative. Excuse me.

I'll have you know that I saved $100 last year. Okay?

And if you weren't so closed-minded, maybe you...

Could learn a little somethin'. Like?

Like... you know how you're afraid of dogs?

Uh, see! Now stop right there. Stop right there.

I don't like dogs, I'm not afraid of 'em.

Big difference. Hand me that toast.

Oh, so now you gonna front.

Now, if I remember correctly, there was a certain somebody...

Who jumped on top of my grandmother's dining room table...

When I brought down her little, little tiny puppy named Taffy.

No, see. Now Taffy should've been named Damien.

That dog was possessed.

Think I saw his head spin around and green shit come flyin' out his mouth.

Anyway, it says in here...

That if you sing James Brown songs, dogs will not attack.

Well, James Brown tried that shit with state troopers, and you saw what happened to him.


[ Wayman humming ] What's he cookin'? It smells good in here.

Sausages. Want one?

[ Sausages sizzling ]

No, thanks. Mo' be for her.

I like cookin' when I'm dealin' with meat you don't know what you're missin', Shame. Wayman sure can burn.

...is through his stomach eat on yeah, well he should try keepin' his head away from the stove while he's burnin'.

Oh, no, he didn't! Miss Peaches?

Shame, now I told you he is very sensitive about his hair.

He should be. Look like Woodstock went a little peroxide crazy.

Well you didn't seem to have a problem with it last night...

When you was runnin' your fingers through it, sharpshooter.

Hey, man, I didn't touch you.

Oh, now don't go get your boxers into a bunch...

Just 'cause you were cruisin' in your sleep last night.

And... started speedin'. Okay, that's it.

Hold it! Now hold up.

I gotta go to the post office, okay?

Now do you think you can manage to get along...

For ten minutes while I'm gone? Oh, I'm cool, Peaches.

Now you tell little Richard to stay away from me.

Hmph. "Cruisin' in my sleep."

You better behave yourself, okay?

Can't fool me with them hard-ass feet. Okay.

Oh, Peaches, on your way to the post office...

Could you please stop by the store and get me a box of relaxer?

And make sure that it says mild. Last time you got me super, girl.

[ Man ] Say, where's a pretty lady like you been all my life?

[ Peaches ] All your life? I have no idea.

So how can I, you know, how can I get those digits?

Digits. Um, let me think.

Uh, there's my friend. Sorry, I have to go.

I want you to know, I had to put up with a greasy jheri curl...

And some stank breath to get all of this, all right.

Now that was everything that was in her box.

Now what about that number that salesperson gave to you? Turned out to be a service.

[ Peaches ] Figures.

Now what? Well...

Now I want you to call and leave her a message.

Tell her a shipment of that perfume is comin' in today about 2:00.

Won't she know something's up if she shows up and there's no perfume?

You let me worry about the details.

Just make sure you put all that back.

Shame, do not make me go back in there. [ Laughing ]

Well, you got a little admirer, huh? Yes, I do.

All right, I'll take care of it. Thank you.

Yo, my man? Yeah, what's up?

Little lady over here? Yeah?

She's crazy 'bout you, brother.

Let me get out y'all love birds' way.

You know, 14 carat. Don't make me use my stun gun.

I'm tired of this nonsense.

Well, I'm tryin' to make your day.

[ Radio announcer ] Remember 82.3, the phrase that pays.

I'm the Duke of Dance. The Prince of Party play...

Excuse me. May I help you? Uh, yes.

Denise? No, Diane.

Diane. I'm lookin' for something for my girlfriend.

Mmm, something for your girlfriend.

Well, this here is just lovely.

Feel the leather. You can tell by the smoothness and the texture, the quality of the bag, that this animal died of natural causes.


Mmm, damn. Five hundred.

Wow. Do you all have anything that was shot or stabbed or somethin'?

Why, I have an idea.

Why don't you scurry on down to pick-and-spends.

You can get a hat, a jacket and a bag, with mad money to spare.

You know, I think you're right. Maybe I should just go home, break open a piggy bank, see how much money I really have.

I-I'll be back. I'll wait on it.

[ Phone ringing ] Okay, just sign right there.

All right. Good afternoon. Sincati.

Turn your radio down! Turn your radio down! Uh, hold on a second.

Is this Diane kendricks? Who's this?

Diane, this is the Duke of Dance, the Prince of Party.

And if you can tell me the phrase that pays, you can win $10,000!

Now tell me, Diane. What's your favorite radio station? 82.3?

That's right, Diane! You're our new winner!

[ Screaming ]

Oh, my god! Oh, my god!

I can't believe this. I knew something good was gonna happen to me today.

I knew it because my big toe was swollen!

And my uterus has been doin' flips all day.

Oh, god! Jesus loves me!

Jesus loves me! Oh, god! Oh, god! Thank you. Thank you.

Well, Diane, you only have 82.3 minutes...

To shake that money maker down here and pick up that prize.

[ Yelling ] Oh, today is my day! Miss, my scarf.

Yee-hah! I knew it. Aren't you gonna wrap my scarf?

Oh, wear it, bitch. We got to go.

Go, go, go!

Thank you. Please come again. Oh!

[ Woman ] Well, what was that all about?


Excuse me.

Excuse me. Excuse me, sir.

I'm sorry, but this club is for women only.

Yeah, I know. But see, I have a friend in there and I really need to speak to her.

Look, pal, the sign says "women only."

Shame? Hey, Wayman, what's up, man?

What's up? What are you doin' here? What are you doin' here?

Ha. I work here. What happened to the wigs and costumes, and I am yours, and energy is mine and all that?

That is my hobby. This pays the bills.

Look, I need you to do me a big favor.

I'm tailin' somebody, and I need to know if she gave me the slip.

The bearded lady back here won't let me in. You're a little late.

I'm about to go to lunch. And I'm not a vegetarian, so fish is not on the menu.

Yoo-hoo! Wayman!

Hey, Bernard! What's harpin'?


'Scuse me. Who's this?

This is Bernard. Hey, what's wrong with you? The Bernard?

Yeah! It's me.

Home wrecker! He's with me!

What? I can't believe you just did that!

You are my stuff, and you know it. Don't even try.


He's lyin'. Don't believe him, Bernard. Don't believe him.

Oh, you did not say that last night when we was in bed together, girl.

You slept with him! You slut!


Save your tears, honey. You never had a chance.

Coffee's good with cream, but better when it's black.

Don't you ever, ever...

Call me again. But...

And you, Mr. coffee, if you'd like some steamed milk with your double Espresso, I'm your man.

Bernard, I'm sorry. I promise I'll call you. Don't start with me, Wayman.

Shame, why did you do that? Now look, you work with me, and I'll call him and tell him it was a joke.

Here's what she looks like.

[ Knock at door ] Yeah? Who is it?

It's Hank.

Sure those are for me?

Man said 1504. Angela Flowers.

Okay. Thanks.

No. Hey, did he tell you who...

Is that any way to treat the man you were supposed to spend the rest of your life with?

Shame, what are you doin' here? You look good.

You look like shit. Yeah? Well today was laundry day.

Look, if this is a social call...

Don't let the flowers fool you, baby. It's strictly business.

Now get in here and sit down!

Thought you weren't a cop anymore. I'm not.

I'm a private investigator working with the D.E.A.

[ Woman ] D.E.A. May I help you?

Special agent Rothmiller, please. One moment.

[ Sonny ] It's me, Shame. Yeah, Sonny. What's up?

I got her. Where?

8517 artesian way.

All right, I'm on my way over. I'll see you in a minute.

[ Laughing ]

Hey, primo. Hey, primo. Que hubo?

Bien. They found the girl.

I want you to handle this, primo, okay?

Bring the girl to me. Okay? And Shame?

I want you to enjoy killing Shame.

Gracias, primo. [ Chuckling ]

Ricardo, Julio, preparen las armas.

So tell me, Shame. How'd you find me?

Your perfume.

You remembered.

I'm impressed.

You know, Shame, you made me break all my rules.

I never meant to hurt you.

No, just use me, right?

It wasn't like that.

Oh, bullshit! All that time I thought you were in love with me, and you were just using me to get close to Mendoza.

That's a lie, and you know it!

Yeah? Then why'd you follow him to Mexico?

Is that what you think? You think I went to Mexico lookin' for him?

You think I fucked up my life and my career for him?

I went to Mexico lookin' for you!

Let go of me!

[ Sighs ]

Why are you telling me this now?

Look, what's done is done. I can't change that. I just want this to be done with...

So I can get on with my life.

Look, we'll put you in protective custody.

All you gotta do is testify against Mendoza.

He goes away, then you start with a clean slate.

[ Chuckles ] You always were late, Shame.

Sweetie, don't the D.E.A. tell you anything?

I've been under protective custody for the last six months.

Shit, I would've testified against Mendoza a long time ago...

Except somebody tipped him off.

He got away just before the justice department moved in.

But Sonny said that you came to him.

Oh, shit. It's a setup.

We gotta get outta here. We gotta get outta here now. What?

Esperate aqui.

Oye. I need to know what apartment this woman lives in.

I'm sorry, sir. I can't give that kind of infor...

Apartment 1504. Gracias.

Julio, Tomas, Ricardo, las escaleras.

Sancho, esperate aqui.

You said you wanted a blonde. I'm a blonde.

Boy, I hope I can trust you. The last time I wound up naked in the back of a taxi.

Don't worry, I brought my own car. Shit, we're bein' robbed.

Oh, whew! I thought it was my wife.

[ Elevator bell rings ]

Mmm, mmm.

[ Whispering ] Get your hands off my ass.

Just go with the program.

Mmm, mmm.

[ Elevator bell rings ]

Help! Help!

Que cabron. I agarralos!

Hi! Hey, baby. What's goin' on?

[ Tires screeching ]

Stop! I agarralos!

Oh! Get the fuck out!

Don't shoot! Get outta here!

Hey, wait! Hey!

[ Horn honks ]

[ Gunshot ]

[ Gunshot ]

[ Tires screeching ]

Take the wheel!

Get down!

[ Panicked yelling ] Get back! Back up!

[ Groaning, yelling ]

[ Groaning ] Motherfucker!

Hold on.

[ Yelling ]

[ Groaning ]

[ Girl ] Welcome to best burgers.

May I take your order, please?

May I take your order, please?

Eh? Ahh!

[ Knocking ] Who is it?

It's me.

Anybody watching my place? Four Mexicans.

Okay, you did what I told you?

Oh, yeah. I had 'em follow me, right?

And then I shook their ass like a bowl of Jell-O.

I left 'em at south central somewhere. They beggin' the homies not to get in that ass.

Peaches, Angela. Angela, Peaches. Hello.

Look, where's Wayman? He's out dancin'.

He is not gonna be back 'til late tonight.

All right. Now, I gotta go take care of business.

Shame, you're not takin' me? See, this is what I'm talkin' about, Shame.

Okay, you are sleepin' on my skill, see? What is so superb...

Peaches, I need you to stay here.

Now you keep your eye on her, okay?

Don't let her out of your sight.

Always wanna be James Bond.

Gracias, Tomas.

Get outta the way! Don't make me slap your fat ass!

What, what is this shit? You gonna fucking frisk me?

You gonna fucking frisk me?

Hey, Mendoza, I need to talk to you now!

Mendoza, right now!


If he told you to please leave, I'm tellin' you to get the fuck out!

Fuckin' immigrations will give me a fuckin' medal...

If I back a truck up in here and pack your fuckin' asses in it!

Why did you come here?

Why did I come here?

Your man fucked up, that's why.

I told you to let me handle this. I could've found the girl.

But you wanted to play this sick, little fucking game of yours.

No! Shame started this.

He tried to take my business, my life and my woman.

This is what this is all about, isn't it?

A fucking woman.

No! This is about business, Sonny.

Twenty million dollars.

Killing Shame and Angela... That's fun.

Okay, well I got news for you, Pancho Villa, or whoever the fuck you think you are.

While you're up there playin' fucking games, you're leaving a trail.

And it's gonna start to point to me! Now, I'm warning you.

Do you know who you're fucking with?

I'm fucking Sonny Rothmiller!

I know every goddamn thing!

I'll tell 'em every fuckin' contact you got in the states!

I'll name names, dates, places!

I'll give 'em the fuckin' Texas politicians, New York, Miami, Washington.

Are you threatening me, Sonny?

Are you threatening me?

You are a guest in my house.

Show me some fucking respect.

Que si.

I am simply saying...

That things are gettin' a little outta hand.


You'll let me take care of things from here on out.

That's a good idea.

[ Chuckles ]

I think you should be going now, my friend. You got a lot of cleanin' up to do.

Hey, you were right.

My man fucked up.

Sonny. Sonny!

Please... make sure that you don't fuck up.

I'll take care of it. Okay.

Hasta la vista.

[ "Shame" ]

♪ Shame, oh my darling ♪ ♪ Oh my darling ♪

♪ It's such a shame ♪ ♪ It's such a shame, baby ♪

♪ You could be yearning ♪ ♪ You could be yearning ♪

♪ Said I can't live with the pain ♪

♪ Can't live with the pain ♪ ♪ I can't live with the pain ♪

♪ I can't live with the pain ♪

♪ I can't live with the pain ♪

[ "Guantanamera" ]

[ Gun cocks ]

Blink and black'll be the last thing you see.

Get up. We're goin' for a ride.

[ TV ] [ Laughing ]

Well, I guess that leaves you and me.

It's been a bad night all around, ain't it?

[ Laughing ]

Is there something to eat around here?

I suggest you look in the refrigerator.

[ Laughing ]

[ Peaches ] That's right, weezie.

Well, don't just stand there, shorty, get down.

[ Laughing ] Look at George get down!

That's right. You do that funky chicken!

It's funny. Shame never mentioned you to me before.

Bothers you that he's so in love with me, doesn't it?

[ TV off ]

Now, what makes you think that he's still in love with you?

Oh, I can see it in his eyes. So can you.

So what, okay? Shame might be soft on you, okay?

But I can see right through all that mabeline.

And I know you ain't nothin' but a gold digger's skank.

Tryin' to get a man for everything that he's got. I'm gonna tell you like this.

You hurt Shame again...

And you better watch your back.

[ Chuckles ] You're so cute.

Protective, even.

You know, Shame used to have this little puppy.

Little scraggly little thing he picked up from the gutter.

As always doin' things like that.

Problem with the thing is it just kept shitting all over the house.

I mean, I tried to train it, but it just kept shitting.

Well, I put up with it for as long as I could...

Until one day the little bitch snapped at me.

Took her to the vet and put her to sleep.

Are you calling me a dog?

Oh, so you wanna box, is that what it is? You want some of this?

Hey, you know what? It ain't nothing to it but to do it.

You know what I'm sayin'? All we gotta do is push this to the side.

There's nothing but space and opportunity here. You know what I'm sayin'?

Do you want some of this? Look, I don't have to deal with this shit.

Well, then leave. There's the door. Leave!

That's what I'm gonna do. Well, then, get the fuck out!

I don't need this shit. Hmph, hmph!

I just tell him that she left. Shame, she's gone.

She's grown. She went to go get something to eat.

[ Sighs ] He gonna kick my ass!

Yo, ang... shit!

What the fuck are we doin' here? Shut up and sit down!

Why are we here?

I just wanted a place two old friends could talk in private.

Yeah, well, there's just you and me and... The "cockaroaches."

What the fuck do you want?

I want Mendoza.

[ Laughing ]

What is it with you, huh? You got a death wish?

You're fucking with the wrong guy!

If you're gonna kill me, do it!

If not, then I'm not gonna sit...


What do you mean, "okay"?

Okay, I asked for your help, and you said no.

You're free to go.

[ Clanking ]

[ Clinking ]

Son of a bitch!

Motherfuckin' Shame! You're gonna die, man!

That's right. I gonna kick your motherfuckin' ass!

What the fuck is this place?

[ Together ] Yeah! This is the land of the white man.

Yeah! We have to reclaim our land!


White power! White power!

[ Crowd chanting ] White power! White power!

White power! White power!

Excuse me.

Could somebody tell me where the exit... is?

[ Man ] You're dead meat!

[ Panting ]

[ Shouting ] His ass is mine!

Get the greaseball!

Hey, Luis! Como esta? You don't look too good, man. You want a ride?

Save your pity for the fucking... Pull over!

Where can I find Mendoza?

Fuck you!

Well, Luis, I got some good news and I got some bad news.

The good news is you're only five miles from East L.A.

The bad news is it's that way.


[ Shouting ]

Okay, okay, man.

He owns a club in Hollywood. La Isla de salsa.

I'm supposed to meet him there later. Now, come on, pull over, man!


Hey, relax, man. I know how to handle these people.

Hey, listen up! Luis says the white man can kiss his ass!

Make sure you tell 'em you're friends with Al Sharpton.

Black power! Black power!

Shame, you son of a bitch! Shame, you motherfucker!

Oh shit! Oh, oh! You can't leave me on this street alone!

[ Humming ]

♪ I don't want no ♪ ♪ Short, short man ♪

♪ I don't want no ♪ ♪ Short, short man ♪

♪ I don't want no ♪ ♪ Short, short man ♪

♪ Isn't that cute ♪ ♪ An extra bellybutton ♪

♪ Teeny-weeny, teeny-weeny shriveled up... ♪ That looks like Shame. Nah, it can't be that clean.

♪ Go crazy, get dizzy ♪ ♪ Get crazy, get retarded ♪

♪ Go Wayman, get dizzy ♪ ♪ Get crazy, get retarded ♪

♪ Go Wayman, get dizzy ♪ ♪ Get crazy, get retarded ♪

[ laughing ]

You boys mind if I join your party?

Revisalo bien.

So, Shame, you in the mood for dancing, huh?

You should've called me. You know I would've made you a reservation.

[ Chuckles ] It's quite all right.

I bumped into Luis. He told me I could find you here.

Where is Luis?

Couldn't make it. Had a little runnin' around to do.

Let me buy you a drink. Marisol?

Si, senor. Aca.

[ Marisol ] What can I get for you?

What do you suggest?

Sex on the beach.

Why don't you give me your phone number? I'll see what I can arrange.

I don't think so.

Una botella de patron.

And another glass, please. Sure, coming.

Careful, Shame.

She's already taken.

But then that never stopped you before, did it?

Come on! You're not still pissed about that, are you?


Angela was a beautiful woman.

She loved to fuck. [ Laughing ]

[ Indistinct ]

Frankly, Shame, I was surprised that you fell for a whore like that.

[ Chuckles ] Oh, that was low.

That was low.

I'll tell you a funny thing about whores.

You know, they talk a lot.

Yeah, she told me about your little problem.

I just wonder. Did you get that fixed along with your face?

[ Laughing ]

Este carajo no joda.

Este carajo si que es chistoso.

[ Laughing ]

I'm glad to see you still haven't lost your sense of humor, Shame.

Too bad you're a cop.

I really like you!

Really? That's pretty funny.

You know... I never liked you.

♪ It's gettin' kinda hectic ♪ ♪ It's gettin', it's gettin' ♪

♪ It's gettin' kinda hectic ♪ ♪ It's gettin', it's gettin' ♪

♪ It's gettin' kinda hectic ♪ ♪ It's gettin', it's gettin' ♪ Salud.

[ Gunshot ] [ Screams ]

You back off, my friend. I will kill this beautiful flower.

I don't give a fuck. She don't wanna give me her phone number anyway.

555-6969. I callate!

I'm a scorpio. I love Chinese food.

I callate, te dije! No jodas. Call me anytime.

I'm going to ease out of here...

Nice and easy.

I can't let you do that.

You're not gonna shoot! You're a cop, man!

Wrong. I'm a ex-cop.

Excuse me. Let me see what's going on. Shame!

[ Screaming ]

[ Screams ] Oh, no! I've been shot!

Oh, please don't die, Wayman! Don't die, Wayman!

Somebody call a doctor! Doctor!

[ Sniffs ] Calm down. Calm down. Oh, no.

Wayman, you're fine. It's not blood.

It's just... wine.

And the nominees for best actress in a groovy nightclub drama...

Miss Wayman harrington.

[ Sirens wailing ]

Put the gun down, Shame.

Pretty good, lieutenant. Should've known I couldn't fool you.

Yeah? Well, this is serious.

You're in deep shit this time!

I'm takin' you in. Where's Angela?

She left.

What the fuck you mean she left?

Just like I said!

I went to go get her somethin' to eat. I came back and she was gone.

Peaches, I told you not to let her out of your sight.

How come you ain't tell her about me, Shame?

What? Are you listenin' to me?

Look, I think I know where she is. I gotta go find her. You're not goin' anywhere!

Is this who you got all dressed up for?

Is this why you got all dressed up? For her?

And I look at your raggedy ass every day, and Pocahontas comes here for five minutes, and you wanna get all snazzy!

Peaches, I ain't got time for this shit!

Now look, lieutenant, I almost had Mendoza tonight. He's in L.A.

What are you talkin' about? Mendoza's dead. I don't have time to explain.

Here's what he looks like. Now I need you to seal off the airports and the bus stations.

I don't believe this. The guy's giving me orders now.

And put checkpoints...

On the highways in case he makes a run for Mexico. All right, I'll look into it.

In the meantime, I'm takin' you to jail! Yeah, and do me a favor.

Put Peaches in protective custody for 24 hours, will ya?

Shame, don't walk out that door.

Shame, you walk out that door, and I'll shoot ya.

Yeah, yeah. I'll call you when I got something.

How you just go and let him leave like that?

You know doggone well you're supposed to go there and arrest him. Put him in handcuffs.

You're just gonna let him trollop around. Hey!

Now you I will shoot. Get dressed. Let's go.

[ Angela gasps ]

Well, well, well what do we have here?

You were gonna open it, right?

Go ahead, open it.

Yeah, but I thought you said you were going to take care of things, Sonny!

The fucking cowboy almost shot my ass off! Come on, calm down.

I'm on top of everything. I'm trying to get us a little insurance.

Hey, hey, hey. Pull over.

Who wants popcorn?

Sounds good to me. I'll have some.

I'd like some also.

Hey, y'all got any toothpicks?

Oh, my god. Look, don't kill me, all right? Just don't hurt me, okay?

Shut up. Let's go.

Don't hurt me, all right?

I don't know nothin' about this.

All right, all right. I'm not gonna hurt you.

Cross your heart, hope to die?

You promise?

Yeah, I promise.

Oh, god, thank you. God, thank you.

Motherfucker. I'm gonna get your little fuckin' ass! Get outta there!

Don't you fuck with me! Get your fuckin' ass...

You think you're fuckin' cute, right?

What the fuck are you gonna do with that? What ya gonna do with that?

[ Screams ] Damn it!

Damn it! God... damn it!

Come on, you little bitch!

[ Yells ]

[ Yells ]

Come on!

[ Screams ]

Ow. Fu...

I'm gonna whip your ass now!

[ Sonny ] C'mere, damn it! C'mere!

I'm gonna get your ass!

Oh, shit!

Now you said... that you wouldn't hurt me.

Oh, don't worry, I'm not gonna hurt you.

I'm just gonna throw you through the fuckin' wall!

Sonny! Calm you, Sonny.

Relax. She's a lady. [ Laughing ]

I'm Sonny fuckin' Rothmiller. You can lay that shit. Fuck with me?

Now let me get this straight.

The 20 million that was in Mendoza's safe he smuggles back in a coffin.

Then you steal the money from him, and turn him into the feds.

Well, I guess there's no honor amongst thieves, right?

You know, you can go straight to hell. In fact, all of you can go straight to hell.

How dare you sit there and judge me!

I've been on my own since I was 12 years old. Ain't nobody done shit for me.

So, I saw my chance, I took it.

So, tell me. What were you gonna do with the money?

I don't know, Shame.

Travel, see the world. [ Chuckles ]

Maybe start my own empire.



You told me when you were a young girl, you used to dream about being Cleopatra.

You always did listen to me.

Well, you never really stopped talkin'.

You still make me laugh too.

You know, it never would've worked out between you and I.

You never could've given me what I wanted.

And what was that?

To be number one in your life.

And how would you know that?

You never gave me a chance.

[ Phone ringing ]

[ Phone ringing ] Oh, sh...


Hello, Shame. I hope I'm not interruptin' anything.

You know, you should take better care of your women.

You turn your back, and they might fall into the hands of another man.

Let me speak to Peaches.

[ Shame ] Peaches? Yeah.

You okay? No, I'm all right. I'm on the beach!

So, now you see, my friend. I got something you want, and you got something I want.

So, let's be reasonable, okay?

You name the time and place, I'll be there.

Well, let me see. You probably want someplace safe, out in the open with lots of people, right?

Okay, how 'bout one of my establishments?

The palisades mall... In two hours. Be there.

Yeah, I got it.

Do me a favor. Tell Sonny to come along.

Yeah, sure. Why not?

It will be just like old times.

[ Chuckling ] It's set, my friend.

Where're we going? [ Sighs ]

They got Peaches.

Look, baby, we can just take this money and get outta here.

Look, I can't do that. She's my friend.

Look, we'll call the cops. They can handle this.

Mendoza would kill her! In time, you'll forget all about her.

Stop it. Look, baby, we can take this money to an island.

Make love under the sun. Don't do this to me again. Stop. Stop it!

Now what part of this didn't you understand?

I told you she's my friend.

And I ain't sellin' her out for you, for money...

And definitely not for a fuck under the island sun.

Now you got a choice.

You can trust me and help me put an end to this shit, or take your chances on your own.

You care about her that much?


Okay, Shame... Just promise me you're gonna smoke his ass.

Like a motherfuckin' pack of kools.

[ Knocking ]

Perimeter is secure. Are you sure your men can handle this?

These guys are military trained! They'll eat Shame alive!

We're not outta there in ten minutes, they'll storm it.


Come on.

Station three is clear here.

That's far enough.

[ Laughing ]

So it's like that, huh, Sonny?

Yeah, it's like that.

You sold out the whole unit, huh?

This isn't about sellin' out. It's about gettin' paid.

So good people gotta die so you can get paid? I was gonna cut 'em all in.

I told 'em all. I said, "you know, we can split the money five ways."

And you know what they said?

"Only if Shame was down."

And we both know that wasn't going to happen.

So you made a deal with the devil.

I only got one question, man. Why didn't you kill me too?

Somebody had to take the blame.

This is quite a tender moment, guys. I'm touched.

But I'm a little pressed for time, so can we get on with this shit?

Where's my money, Shame?

The ladies first.

The perfect gentleman. [ Laughing ]

Peaches, I hope you're as good as you say you are.

Hello, my sweet. I just want you to know that before I kill you, we're going to make love one last time.

It's a trick!

Kill her! Kill the girl!

Kill him!

[ Shame ] Peaches, go around!

I'm going after the money! Everybody dies!

Don't worry. Hit it!

All right, look, Peaches. We gotta split up. What? What?

Now there's an exit on the top level that leads you to the garage.

I want you to get in my car and wait for me. Go! Ah, shit.

Shame? Yeah?

I love you.

I love you too, Peaches. Now get outta here!

[ Glass shattering ] Shit!

Look, I'll draw their fire. Give me a gun! Quick!

All right, go! Get outta here!

[ Gunfire ]

Yeah, I'm in front of the Sports Chalet.

[ Gunshot, groans ]

The place is filled with flammables. Hold your fire!

[ Whispering ] Shit.

[ Screams ]

[ Screaming ]

Thank you.

Bring in the dogs. Bring in the dogs now!


[ Growling, barking ] Come on.

[ Panting ]


[ Barking, growling ]

Holy shit!

[ Barking, growling ]

I'm gonna get that sucker.

[ Barking, growling ]

Shit. Fuck.

Okay. Ah, Shame, think, man, think!

Say it loud! I'm black and I'm proud!

Say it loud. I'm black and I'm proud!

♪ Baby, baby, baby ♪ ♪ Baby, baby, baby ♪

♪ Watch me now ♪ ♪ I got it... ow, baby ♪

♪ Baby, baby, baby watch me now ♪

[ Yells ] Peaches, I love you.

♪ One, two, three, four get up, get ♪ ♪ On up stay on the scene, get on up ♪

[ Indistinct ] Attack!

♪ All right now, I want ♪ ♪ All the dogs on the left ♪

♪ Move your heads ♪ ♪ From side to side ♪

♪ All the dogs on the right go ooh, ooh ♪ ♪ Here we go ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh here we go ♪ Perros, get him!

♪ Stay on the scene ♪ ♪ Like a love machine ♪

♪ The way I like it ♪ ♪ Is the way it is ♪

♪ I got mine and he got his ♪

♪ I've got it, huh gotcha! ♪

[ Growling, snarling ] [ Gasps ]

Good dog.

♪ Guantanamera, guajira ♪

♪ Guantanamera ♪

♪ Guantanamera ♪

[ Screaming ] No!

[ Barking ]

[ Barking ]

Don't move!

Is that the money?


Step away from it.

What is it about you that makes men crazy?

Well, I don't know.

I guess you're just gonna have to find out for yourself.

Well... [ Sighs ]

The nectar is, uh, tempting, but, uh, you're poison.

So I think I'll pass.

Suit yourself then.

How do you feel about yourself now, stupid motherfucker? You coulda had some pussy.

[ Gunshot ]

Oh, shit! I can't believe I just did that.

I'm always... Peekaboo!

I like you, pequenita. You got a lot of heart.

But your boyfriend is starting to piss me off!

Where is he? Shame! Shame!

[ Mendoza ] Shame! Shame!

Get up!

Yeah, get up, man! Show us what's up now! You was talkin' about a ying yang.

You was lookin' for my boyfriend. Here he is. Now, what's up?

Yeah, we 'bout to dig in that ass. Now you want to be shot!

Hmph! Right, Shame?

I guess I should just go wait in the car, huh?

Yeah, you bounce, Shame. What are you doing on the ground?

Look here!

Get up! Get up!

Mas facil.

I ahora si!

My turn!

[ Groans ] Aaah!

Oh... shit.


Let's go. Get up!

You know, there's somethin' I've been wantin' to tell you for a long time.

You're under arrest.

[ Laughing ] Yeah, I think I gonna make the bail, man.

[ Laughing ] Yeah? Yeah.

How you gonna do that? I got your money. Let's go.

[ Gunshot ]


I love you, Shame, but I know you won't let me keep this money.

Besides, I told you. I don't like being second.

Bye, baby.

I told you I would drop you where you stand.

Oh, you ain't talkin' shit now.

I thought you were gonna kick my ass!

You want some of this little moccasin?

Come on!

Yeah! Now how 'bout that?

Aah! That's right, bitch!

I thought I told you to stay in the car.

Thanks, Peaches.

Come on. You know I'm dangerous.

Peaches, how come the only time I get to touch you like this...

Is when you're all bruised and bloody?

Are you comin' on to me?

Well... you've really done it this time!

Look at this place.

Oh, my god! This is gonna cost hundreds of thousands of dollars!

Had to do it yourself, huh? Yeah.

Well... nothing I can do for you this time, kid.

You are gonna take the credit for all of this!


Excuse me?

I'll take all the credit.

Credit for what?

For the fatal capture of Ernesto Mendoza, the discovery of a D.E.A. mole, not to mention the safe return of a federal witness...

And $15 million in drug money.

Go on.

Go on. Get the fuck outta here, both of yous, before I change my mind!

[ Chuckles ]

Now wait a minute, Mr. Shame.

Yes, miss Peaches?

I thought there was $20 million? Well, there was.

But seeing that I was hired by a government official, that entitles me to my fee of ten percent.

Uh-huh. And seeing that nobody knew about the $20 million, that entitles me to a finder's fee of fifteen percent.

Mm-hmm. And, uh, since I'm your assistant, that entitles me to... $4.45 an hour.

Um, excuse me, lieutenant Nunez... Plus perks and bonuses.

♪ A homie, lover, friend ♪ ♪ Is what I'm looking for ♪ Oh, Shame!

This reminds me of that episode on General Hospital with Luke and Laura.

See, Luke was a spy.

And right before the bad guys came and got him, Laura ran in. Peaches?

Peaches. Huh?

Kiss me before I change my mind.

♪ A homie, lover, friend ♪ ♪ Is what I'm looking for ♪

♪ A homie, lover, friend ♪ ♪ Is what I'm looking for ♪

♪ Shame ♪ ♪ Lowdown dirty shame ♪

♪ Kicking it live ♪ ♪ Like there ain't no thing ♪

♪ Lowdown, dirty shame ♪ ♪ Kicking it live like there ain't no thing ♪

♪ Shame ♪ ♪ Lowdown dirty shame ♪

♪ Kicking it live ♪ ♪ Like there ain't no thing ♪

♪ Lowdown, dirty shame ♪ ♪ Kicking it live like there ain't no thing ♪

♪ Shame, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Kicking it live ♪ ♪ Like there ain't no thing ♪

♪ Shame, you'll learn ♪ ♪ To live ♪

♪ It's a lowdown dirty shame ♪

♪ 'cause, baby ♪ ♪ They're bad ♪

♪ Shame ♪ ♪ Burning ♪

♪ Keep my whole body yearning ♪

♪ You've got me so confused ♪ ♪ It's a shame ♪

♪ Ooh, sometimes I think ♪ ♪ I'm goin' insane ♪

♪ But still all the same ♪

♪ Right in your arms ♪ ♪ Is where I want to be ♪

♪ Is where I want to be ♪

♪ Right in your arms ♪ ♪ Is where I want to be ♪

♪ That is a high ♪

♪ Shame ♪ ♪ Oh, my darling ♪ ♪ Oh, my darling ♪

♪ It is such a shame ♪ ♪ It is such a shame, baby ♪

♪ It's a shame ♪ ♪ That I love you so ♪

♪ You keep me burning ♪ ♪ You keep me yearning ♪

♪ I can't live ♪ ♪ With the pain ♪

♪ You keep me yearning ♪

♪ Hey ♪

♪ Got to groove on ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪ ♪ Got to groove on ♪

♪ Mm-hmm ♪

♪ Tell me, people ♪ ♪ Why you're holding back ♪

♪ Don't you feel the beat ♪ ♪ From this funky track ♪

♪ Ain't no time to waste ♪ ♪ Get up on your feet ♪

♪ For a real good time ♪ ♪ I got what you need ♪

♪ Oh, people ♪ ♪ Feel the feeling ♪

♪ Don't you know you need ♪ ♪ Some fun time reeling ♪

♪ Girls are dancing ♪ ♪ DJ's grooving so right ♪

♪ And right now ♪ ♪ I'm in need of a body ♪

♪ Let's get it on, baby ♪

♪ Don't be afraid ♪ ♪ 'cause I won't bite ♪

♪ Baby, I can follow you ♪ ♪ Through the night ♪

♪ So when you're in the mood ♪ ♪ To rock with me tonight ♪

♪ And we can hit the groove ♪ ♪ Until the morning light ♪

♪ Gotta get my groove on ♪

♪ Groove on, groove on ♪

♪ Gotta get yo' groove on ♪