Badhaai Ho (2018) Script

"Glory to the great Lord Hanuman!"

"Grace our home with your presence, 0 Lord Hanuman"

"Grace our home with your presence, 0 Lord Hanuman"

"Come bless our home, along with Lord Rama..."

Baljit! Wait!

Baljltl m be back in a bit!

"Grace our home with your presence, 0 Lord Hanuman"

The prayers are over and you've turned up now?

Give me a break. My maid skipped work again! Who's going to do our dishes, you?

Gular!

Gular!

Gular!

Nakul!

Nakul, for your mother's sake!

The sherbet's here!

Here are the rules.

Show me! Read and understand.

You especially!

Babli, see the rules.

Come on, let's start!

In such a hurry to gamble...

They've skipped six whole verses!

Girls, are you ready? Yes, Yes... Call out the numbers!

Sixteen. Wow.

Forty-six. Do it properly, Nakul!

The jar's so small, my hand barely fits!

Then tilt it!

All the chips will fall out.

Thief at your door, Number Four.

No luck today!

MS Dhoni, Number Seven.

Bring your mom some luck!

Pack of cards, Fifty-Two.

Your place or mine... Sixty-Nine.

Mine!

Sixty-Nine.

Got anything?

Want to check it out?

Inderpuri Bus number Forty-Seven.

I finished a line!

Come, see for yourself!

It's really not my day!

Tell me about it...

Check it. All good?

Come on, where's my prize!

Here you go.

Oh no, What's this, Babli? Liquid soap? Give me a bar instead.

You know how these maids are, she'll squeeze it out in four days.

Come on, don't make a fuss.

Last time when you gave me Sprite, did I ask for Fanta?

I know!

Hello. Yeah, I'm a little busy. Some important work...

Can't I have work on a Sunday?

Yeah, I'll be there. Sure. See you. Bye.

Buying flowers?

Yeah.

Oh.

When I ask you to buy me flowers, you get all awkward.

And today you're gifting flowers?

What else can I buy?

You'll only buy flowers for me, understand?

Gift her this.

Are you crazy?

Don't worry, she'll appreciate this.

Are you sure?

Chill, she just wants to meet you. It's not like we're getting engaged!

Sure? I mean, we can get a cheaper bottle...

Surely she'll appreciate that, too?

Thank you, Aunty... I don't drink. actually.

He's lying, Mom. He can drink anyone under the table.

You don't have to feel shy...

Reneé had her first drink with me!

Aunty, actually I need to pick Dad up, so I've to drive back home, that's why.

Ah. Where do you stay?

Lodhi colony.

Father's a government employee?

Yeah, railways.

Indian Railway Services, yeah.

No. He's a Ticket Inspector with the Northern Railways.

Renee was telling me, you're going to the US for onsite work? - Yeah...

Well, laughing at your boss's sad jokes ought to get you somewhere!

Reneé!

I haven't decided yet, Aunty. Haven't discussed it with my parents.

But I'm sure they'll be more than happy, no?

Yeah, maybe.

But mom feels a family should stay together.

I also think I can't stay away from home for long.

This wine is really nice.

Thank you.

Really nice, yes.

Come again. Sure.

Bye, aunty. See you.

Oh, 'Kaushiks'!

You know I've always wondered...

Whether 'Kaushiks' should have an apostrophe or not...

Mom!

No, it's just really interesting...

To know what the car owner wants to say.

That this car belongs to the Kaushik family...

Or that there are many Kaushiks sitting in it?

Well Aunty, the car is ours.

And I've got the papers to prove it.

But only my brother can say What this is supposed to mean.

He got this done.

As far as this horror-movie font is concerned...

I think it our family's a little... Spooky We must beware, then.

Goodbye, Aunty. Goodbye.

See you.

What?

Where is he?

Ravinder! Yes, sir.

Here's a piece of advice. Listen carefully.

Hey... It'll fall!

Look. You're already married.

But before you have a baby... Think it through. Plan it properly.

Today's generation... they're not like us.

They neither value their parents, nor their time.

There he comes!

Thank God!

I've been waiting since half an hour!

Why're you lying, Dad? The train arrived 5 minutes ago!

Stand in this heat and you'll know how it feels.

What are you doing?

It's his job.

Fine, give him mangoes.

Wait.

Here.

Go, enjoy.

Do they grow in our backyard?

Drive slow.

It doesn't speed up even on top gear!

"Drive slow!"

Told you so many times, let me get a new car...

What's wrong with this one?

It's been over thirteen years. I've had no problems with it.

Just listen to yourself.

Reached, finally!

Mr Kaushik!

Hello... All well?

Carry the carton carefully. Yes.

Hello, Uncle. Got mangoes, son?

Yes, Uncle.

Not that Dad's going to share any...

Mom...

How're the mangoes?

Really sweet, son. Delicious!

Not a patch on 'Langra' mangoes. Those are a class apart.

They've called me early to office...

They go to office together every day...

And he's still always on the phone with her.

I don't get it!

He's grown up. Let him do as he pleases.

Focus on the younger one. His final year exams are approaching!

God knows what he'll do.

What will he do? Embarrass us, what else.

We'll have to hand him everything on a platter.

I'll have to use up my retirement fund!

Nakul never gave us any trouble. Especially when it came to studies.

Gular...

Gular!

Dad got us mangoes, son. Have some.

Not interested, mom. You help yourself.

Look at his attitude. Won't even talk properly!

Why blame him? It's your fault.

Before he was born, didn't you leave Khatauli and go to Meerut...

...to your parents'?

He was bound to be detached!

The water in that city is cursed.

Even Shravan Kumar - the devoted son from the Ramayana - betrayed his parents there.

What are you staring at?

It's in the scriptures!

Tell you what.

The demon Raavan's wife Mandotari, didn't she also hail from Meerut?

Of course, I'm the witch haunting this blessed home!

After all, your son is Lord Rama incarnate!

Oh, Babli, what's all this? You keep quiet!

So tell me, what's wrong with my son?

Tell me?

In fact, may God bless everyone with a son like him...

Mom, can't you give it a break?

When she speaks against you, you barely squeak...

And you boss over your poor old mother!

That's your only weakness, Jeetu!

You're scared of your wife!

Why, mom...

"Why, mom!“

Polished off 3 slices...

"Not a patch on 'Langra'!", she says!

Goddamn, imagine my plight. Spending all afternoon playing Bingo host!

Aunty was there too! Which aunty?

Your mom!

"Which aunty?"

After they were done playing Bingo...

As I was smoking a cigarette on the terrace...

Chawla Aunty's daughter-in-law tried getting cozy with me!

I politely told her, "Spare me, sister! I'm a simple guy.

I don't want to jump into bed with you!“ Nonsense! You're lying. I swear, I'm not!

You didn't do anything? No man.

How, dude? I think she's smoking hot!

No bro, not in the colony...

Just say the truth- you chickened out.

Junney... I'm no chicken...

And we all know who's the real wuss here!

Dimple's been posting tons of pictures with her hubby recently.

Saw them? Show me!

She looks so happy finally.

Right, Junney?

Have a look!

Bloody rascal!

Bro, you always worried that you couldn't “make her happy“...

And now that she's happy, you're jealous!

Bastards, I never should've told you.

I trusted you like brothers.

Got drunk and confided in you. Fine, go on!

Man, you're getting all serious, Junney.

We're childhood friends, can't we pull your leg?

Now that you've told us it's a sore spot... we won't touch it. Okay?

Next lime, we'll stand and stomp on it!

Tell us, what does he have that you don't?

Damn!

Are you okay? Man, he got upset.

Balls! Can't take a joke but makes fun of others.

You're no different!

You're okay? Yeah.

What is it?

Mango pulp.

Babli...

If you've cooled off now, can I show you something?

I barely have the time to read all this now...

My poem's been published!

Really? Yes. Page number 34.

Season of Communion', by...

The Brooding Poet.

I've told you so many times don't use that pen name!

It sounds like you're always distraught.

Why would I be distraught with you by my side!

It's just poetic license, silly.

Thank God you weren't married to Harivansh Rai Bachchan...

Or you would've told him...

"Bachcha" means child, it sounds so childish!"

The skies are roaring tonight, eh?

Should I read It out? Yes.

Season of Communion'.

"Today, upon the fertile land...“

"Today, upon the fertile land“

"The sky rains down“

"- The sky... Rains down!"

"Parched land and dark clouds“

"An enchanting encounter"

"A flaming bolt strikes..."

A flaming bolt, meaning?

Lightening.

"A flaming bolt strikes"

"Born is a tender song of love“

"Seeds sprout life from dead rocks"

"As estrangement departs..."

It's lovely. You know something?

You look beautiful with your hair open.

Hush, stop it!

19 WEEKS LATER

Listen... How does it look?

It can be tightened from the back.

What's the occasion? I can help you decide accordingly.

My cousin's getting married in Meerut. Didn't I tell you?

One second.

Why don't you get something like this?

This?

Are you judging my family's taste?

It's so much fun. You get irritated so easily!

Yes Dad!

Where are you?

I'm shopping for Shanoo's wedding.

Mom's unwell and you're busy shopping!

What happened to her?

Take her to Dr Bagga's, quick!

Okay, I'll be there right away.

Let's go, quick! Where?

Mom's not well... I have to go.

Wait a second. Yeah.

At least change your clothes. Oh, shit.

Don't won-y, I'll get it billed. Okay.

Looks fine.

127/82...

You're taking your medicines on time, right?

Yes.

You're perfectly fit!

Bagga Uncle, actually, it's not BP...

Let me talk to your mother!

Yes, tell me.

Doctor, I haven't been feeling well since a day or two.

I'm constantly exhausted; I've lost my appetite...

My stomach's been cramping... And I've vomited a few times too.

Oh, so that's the matter...

You must have eaten some rubbish from the streets.

I see you've put on weight too!

People these days have no self-control.

Mr Mathur came to me right before you.

He's got piles.

Piles.

Open your mouth.

He's shitting blood. Blood!

And he still won't stop gorging on that junk.

Then he'll complain - Doctor, the medicines aren't working!

Nakul, could you just go and call Dad, ask where he's reached?

Mom, let the check-up get over at least?

Do as I say, please...

Bagga Uncle. I had a... 'Lady-problem' as well.

If you could call Aunty...

Just for a check-up.

Hello Aunty...

Aunty?

What are you doing outside?

I just couldn't reach your phone! How's Mom doing?

Bagga and his wife are both examining her.

Okay... Take this, pay the fare.

How much?

Hello Doctor...

The train halted at Faridabad junction, so...


Dad... Is everything okay?

Yes, it's all good, son...

I mean, the doctor suggested a few tests...

Tests?

Yes, just regular ones...

Mom wants you to head back home...

Grandma will be back from the prayer meet soon.

If she finds the house locked, she'll create a ruckus. Gular isn't home either.

So I'll leave? Yes.

Just give me the car keys.

What about Mom?

She's perfectly fine... Don't worry!

You carry on.

Rickshaw, stop!

Pregakem... Pregnancy Detection Kit.

Don't be so surprised.

There have even been cases..

...where the mother's only realized at the time of delivery!

Look it up online.

Considering your age, and because it's been detected late...

You'll need to decide soon if you want an operation.

Don't worry. Think it over for 2-4 days.

But don't delay it further.

Or the risk will increase. Okay?

I'm not getting an abortion.

What do you mean?

I mean, just think it over?

Even the doctor said, take 2-4 days and decide...

It could be risky...

Whatever the risk, I'm sure about this. I can't kill my child.

Listen Babli... Why be stubborn?

At this age. can your body bear this burden?

Has my baby been a burden till now?

There's no way I'm getting an abortion.

I believe it's a sin. You speak for yourself.

All I'm asking is... can we handle this?

Think about it, Babli.

There'll be expenses, so much responsibility... no?

Fine.

It's your body. The final decision has to be yours too.

Okay?

Let's take a final call.

You're sure, right?

I've already told you... Why are you asking again and again?

Yes... Yes son.

Yes, we're coming home.

It's all fine. Yes.


Will you tell us what Bagga said? Everything's okay, right?

Yes...

Gular, why don't you come sit with us? No, I'm good here.

Anyway, India's innings begins in 5 minutes.

Oh, okay. What's the target?

271.

Ah. Will we win?

We'll watch and find out, right?

You're worried about the match? India's on a winning streak anyway!

What's wrong with Mom? I've been asking you for an hour!

Is she fine?

Yeah, that's why I called you guys here.

Umm... Mom's been unwell for the past few days, right?

So the doctor got a few tests done...

So the doctor said...

The doctor said that...

We're expecting a guest at home. A guest?

I'm not vacating my room, Dad! I'm telling you already...

A 'little guest'.

Little guest?

What little guest? That's what the doctor said...


Ma... Got back late from the prayer meet today?

Jeetu, son...

Aren't you sleepy?

Ma, I needed to tell you something...

Hmm... What is it?

A little gently...

Yes, Ma.

“I want my own room, I want my own room..."

Wanted your own room, you brat?

Couldn't sleep between Mom and Dad for a few more years?

So is it my fault?

Ma, Priyamvada was feeling ill for the past few days, so...

What do I tell you, Jeetu...

There's no illness worse than old age.

The body aches, and so does the heart...

Oh Lord Almighty...

Ma... She's carrying...

The Almighty is omnipotent...

He controls everything.

We all carry our own burden...

The Guru told us at the prayer meet...

Whatever life offers you...

Accept it as His blessing.

Don't ask questions.

Don't stress yourself...

It's all God's will...

Ma says it's God's will!

Jeetu son, his blessings are upon you...


You guys are the limit!

Eh! What happened to him?

The water must be hot by now.

Priyamvada... Keep the bucket in the bathroom, will you?

I'll keep it.

Sit, where are you going! Let her do it.

Gular... go keep the bucket please.

Let him eat in peace... Does she have nail paint on?

Ma, didn't I tell you last night?

What did you tell me?

Gular... bolt the door, son.

Where are you off?

It's not such good news, that I must hear it again!

Good news?

What did he say, Jeetu?

Ma, I told you last night...

What did you tell me?

You're going to become a Grandmother...

Can't hear you. Say it again?

Priyamvada's expecting...

As in?

She... I mean, we going to have a baby.

What?

Jeetu..

Children are meant to bring glory to their parents...

But you didn't even give your kids a chance!

You'll make them famous!

Everyone's going to say...

Look at Jitender's kids, cradling Jitender's kid!“ He's old enough to have his own kid. Now he'll be raising a baby brother!

I used to tease Nakul saying I'll die only after I see a toddler in his arms...

Looks like your wife took it seriously!

Have you two abandoned all shame? Completely?

When I watch the holy sermons on TV, you turn it off and switch to the news.

Here's the result-

Now you'll be on the news!

Stand right here! Look at me! Face me! Look this way.

First of all, I want to know... when did you find the time for this?

You better give me an answer.

When I ask you to sit and talk to me...

...you always say you're exhausted...

Actually, you're just in a hurry to lock your door!

Now I understand...

Why her body aches every morning!

Ma, you're blowing this out of proportion...

Well, you're a man after all, just like your father. It's in your genes.

But What about her, the doctor's daughter... didn't she know better?

Her sons are all grown up, and she still flaunts lipstick!

Where are you running off? Stop!

Ma, we'll be back in 5 minutes. Listen to me!

Where are you running off?

Mrs. Kaushik! I've had enough!

Listen Bain... Babli!

Mr. Kaushik!

Is everything fine? Mind your own business, mister!

Please, Bain... stop!

Look, don't spoil your mood.

Thankfully she can't go around without her walker...

Or she'd have announced it to the entire colony by now!

You know how she is... her anger fizzes out just as quickly as it explodes.

She's probably forgotten about it by now.

Forget about me... You didn't even listen to the government!

On the radio, in the papers, on TV...

They cried themselves hoarse on family planning: "Two of us, two of ours!"

Even I saw the ads...

...and understood what protection means!

And you guys didn't get it?

Did I conceive this child alone?

She promptly gave you a clean chit...

And tore me to shreds!

"Look at the doctor's daughter, flaunting lipstick..."

Why get my father into this?

Amazing!

And he's a government servant, to top it!

It beats me...

If he can't obey the government, how has he worked for them all these years?

Please Babli, don't be angry.

It doesn't suit your pretty face.

Don't you dare flatter me!

This is exactly what has lead to this!

What's the time?

Turn back - let's go home.

If Ma misses her medicines, I'll be blamed for that too.

The kids also left without eating in the morning.

Should I play a song?

Alas, what just happened?

How did it happen?

When it happened...

Now, what can one say?

Alas, what just happened?

How did this happen?

When it happened... Why it happened...

Well, it is what it is...

Hello... Hi, where are you?

I've been trying to call you...

Your phone was off. Messaged you at night, no reply...

What's up - is everything okay?

How's Aunty?

I'll call you later.

Nakul? Okay, bye.

What the...

Let it go, don't fret about it...

Alas, what just happened?

He's back.

Don't you dare lock the door!

Can I turn off the lights?

Congrats my dear, congrats to you!

Are you drunk early morning? It's not like that...

Virender? Are you talking to Virender?

It's all thanks to your mushy poetry!

Give me the phone... Listen, Ma wants to talk...

I want to speak to him...

- “render? What happened?

They did it!

What?

They did it again!

Hello?

- To the Fem, to the Gran, To the Daddy and his clan Congrats to them too!

It got disconnected, Ma.

Good morning.

Mr Kaushik!

Is everything fine?

Very well, thanks... How about you?

All good!

It's time for my train, so...

Tried giving a missed call But damn, it got received!

Not as innocent as he looks, is he?

At least he does more than just snore in bed!

So, the easiest and most effective method of contraception is the condom...

What is it? Condom!

What will he do? Embarrass us, what else.

We'll have to hand him everything on a platter.

I'll have to use up my retirement fund!

Nakul never gave us any trouble.

Especially when it came to studies.

Gular!

Oh, congratulations!

Shh! Get inside.

Come here.

Congrats!

Bagga couldn't keep it under wraps!

Anyway, how long could you've kept this under wraps?

By God, I'm so jealous!

Look at her blush! Congrats Missus, Congrats to you!

Congrats Missus, Congrats to you!

To the Fem, to the Gran, To the Daddy and his clan...

Congrats to them tool Nakull Here you are ramshackled Completely past retrieval The news is all over the place!

What will you do now, dear?

When happiness bites your rear How will you show the world your face?

Hello Aunty! Hello.

Is Nakul around?

No, he left for office...

Why don't you come in?

It's okay, Aunty... I'll call him up. Okay...

How are you? Very well...

Hello Aunty!

Is Nakul home?

No son, he's not back yet.

Okay Aunty. Tell him I came over.

Swollen so much with joy Your chest might burst, you said You fired into thin air And an elephant fell on your head

Swollen so much with joy Your chest might burst, you said You fired into thin air And an elephant fell on your head Congrats, Mr Kaushik!

Many, many congrats!

Congratulations!

What will you do now, dear?

When happiness bites your rear How will you show the world your face?

Damnit!

Congrats Missus, Congrats to you!

Congrats Missus, Congrats to you!

To the Fem, to the Gran, To the Daddy and his clan...

Congrats to them too!

No ginger in the tea for you, it can cause acidity.

Add cardamom instead?

Let me check.

Hello Aunty.

Hello...

You are?

Aunty, I'm Reneé...Nakul's colleague.

We go to office together...

Yes, of course! Please come in.

Heard so much about you...

But we've never met, so didn't recognize you.

Come, have a seat.

These are for you, Aunty.

Oh... Thank you.

Please sit!

Nakul!

He went for a bath, must be getting dressed!

Okay, he'll be here.

How are you feeling now, Aunty'?

I'm fine.

Nakul didn't come to office all week and wasn't answering his phone...

So I thought I'd drop by to check.

Oh, is it?

Hello Uncle.

Renee... She and Nakul go to office together...

Oh yes.

Good, good... very good.

Why are you standing up? Sit down.

Tea?

No, Uncle... Thank you.

Little tea? I made.

I don't drink tea.

I want to give it up too, but I can't clear my bowels without my morning tea!

You're working together with Nakul, right?

Same pay scale?

Enough, already!

Yes, uncle.

I am... Northern Railways... Ticket inspector.

Nakul... Your friend!

I'm offering tea, but she's not taking.

Very shy... Yeah, okay.

Why are you talking in English?

If you'd like some cola, Nakul can quickly go and get it.

We don't keep the big bottles at home...

Once opened, it loses its fizz. Gets wasted.

Would you like sherbet instead? Mom we don't have time.

We have an urgent meeting, that's why she's here.

We have to leave right now. Let's go.

Aunty... We're already running late...

Come again, okay?

Yes, aunty.

At least leave your towel behind!

Always in a hurry...

Where are you off to?

Putting the towel out to dry.

She looks Punjabi, no?

Thank you for paying visit!

Couldn't you tell me before coming?

It's my fault?

Fine, I won't come again.

Am I saying that?

Shouldn't you have told me before you disappeared?

Of course I told Vikrant I'd be on leave for a few days.

How does Vikrant matter?

He's my boss, isn't he? What about me?

Don't I deserve to know?

You're not responding to my calls and messages...

Everyone's been asking me...

Even Vikrant's been asking me...

"What happened, is everything okay at his place?"

And if you're so uncomfortable with me meeting your parents...

Fine. Let's call it quits.

Am I saying that? You're taking off on another tangent!

So then tell me, what's the problem. Now.

Well, my mum...

Mum's pregnant.

So are there any complications in the pregnancy?

Wait a minute.

Who's pregnant?

Mum as in, your mum? Who else's, yours?

While other parents arrange their sons' marriages...

...mine are arranging for the Sarbala too!

'Sarbala'?

The little kid who rides with the groom on horseback at our weddings!


Sarbala!

Nakul...

I was laughing at the Sarbala joke.

Nothing else is funny.

Stop laughing.

Stop laughing.

Sorry.

Done?

Listen, I hope you didn't tell your mum that I've not been in office?

I'll get the door.

Nakul... She's the one you go to office with, right?

She's very sweet... What's her name, again?

Reneé.

Yes, Reneé!

Listen son...

Had you taken leave from office?

Yes.

We have to leave for Meerut in two weeks, for Shanoo's wedding, 30...

It won't be a problem taking leave then, would it?

Mom, I'm not going.

How can you say that? It's Shanoo's wedding!

Because I've decided - I can't go.

There's lots of work in office.

What nonsense! Have you gone nuts?

What will your aunt think, what will people say?

Shouldn't you have thought of that?

Of What people will say?

What did you say?

Where are his manners?

Is this how you talk to your father?

I'll... talk to him.

What will you tell him?

What about you?

Will you be coming?

I already told Ma... My final year exams are round the corner.

I'll explain... No! Enough.

You needn't plead with anyone.


Jeetu!

Chawla!

How are you, brother?

You haven't changed one bit!

How are you? Very well.

Hello!

Jeetu, give me your bag.

It's okay - it's not heavy.

Ma, remember Chawla?

Hello Aunty.

Where did your hair disappear?

Let's get going.

Babli, get in from the other side.

Counted the luggage?

No, no! You don't have to pay him.

He's from our staff... It's his job! Never mind.

Give it back!

Chawla, the clock tower stills looks the same!

Hasn't changed a bit! Meerut need not change.

You checked the spelling of 'Welcome', right?

It's correct, sir- I've checked.

Just Google and confirm it once. Okay, sir.

Arrange it in a line, son.

Jeetu's here?

Go tell Guddan, Jeetu's arrived!

They've reached.

Jeetu's finally here... Jeetu!

Welcome!

Many congrats!

And double-congrats to you!

Hello Aunty, please come!

Hello.

Banwari's decorating the venue, is it?

Ah, you remember, I see!

The decoration looks tip-top, doesn't it?

It looks amazing.

This is what one earns for, right?

Look Jiji, his Sari doesn't have any lining!

Guddan, look who's here! He's here?

Chhotu, go collect the luggage!

God bless! How are you?

God bless!

Ma! How are you?

Come Priyam...

I've been waiting to see you ever since I heard the good news!

How are you, Priyam?

The boys didn't come?

The thing is... Gular's exams are coming up, so...

What about Nakul?

Some important office work came up...

That's not done.

What could be more important than his sister's wedding?

Let it go... Don't ruin your mood at your daughter's wedding.

Will you let us in, or are we having a seminar right here?

Guddan, get them tea. Let's talk inside...

Come, slowly...

Come.

No, there's lots of work today... I'll be late.

Okay... I'll leave then.

Yeah carry on.

Mom's on tour and the maid's on leave too.

There's no one at home.

I guess I'll have to cook and clean by myself.

No one's home?

Just wait five minutes... I'll tell Vikrant...

Where is Vikrant?

I'll help you with the cooking.

Cool.

Wait!

Tell Vikrant an emergency came up.


Your Lover, he's ready In your captivity At least take a glance At what his eyes say Your Lover, he's ready In your captivity At least take a glance At what his eyes say Give me a yes and take my life Darling, don't make no more excuses!

My sentimental lover Counts backwards in excitement My sentimental lover Counts backwards in excitement My sentimental lover His badgering is persistent My sentimental lover Counts backwards in excitement


Talks crazy, walks crazy On cloud-nine in a tizzy Eager beaver, Perfumed and ready Talks in tricky seductive lies Sweet talks and calls me baby Eager beaver, Mint breath ready Puppy eyes, Pretends to cry Avoids my eyes, He nudges sly Says Honey, come closer to me His passions overflow, he said Tonight we're gonna wrestle in bed Turn it on and come to me baby!

Give me a yes, and take my life Darling, don't make no more excuses!

My sentimental lover Counts backwards in excitement My sentimental lover Counts backwards in excitement My sentimental lover Counts backwards in excitement My sentimental lover Counts backwards in excitement My sentimental lover His badgering is persistent My sentimental lover Counts backwards in excitement


What happened?

Everything okay?

Nakul?

Say something!

Okay, you tell me...

Are parents supposed to be doing all this?

Are you going to sing, or will you just clap your hands?

Chhotu, listen!

I'll be back in a moment, Aunty!

He's gotten really spoilt!

What are you saying, Mr Chopra!

Business isn't that great these days!

Chhotu's here.

Keep the kebabs here.

Aunty doesn't know, right?

Not at all, Uncle! Great.

Go serve them, son.

Jeetu, to tell you the truth...

Sunny's ex-wife had an affair.

What are you saying!

She pushed him away, and then divorced him on false grounds of impotence!

It destroyed the poor boy's confidence.

Did you take him to a doctor?

We did.

It's been two years since his second marriage.

We're still waiting to get some 'good news'! - What?

No good news yet!

He feels shy talking to me.

So I thought, maybe you could speak to him?

He respects you a lot.

Does he even recognize me?

I only saw him as a baby during his naming ceremony...

...and at his first wedding, Where we barely met for 2 minutes.

How can I talk to him?

If not you, who else do I ask?

Hey Chawla, come here!


What's up!

Jeetu!

Having fun, eh?


Nice! Look at you, trying to look like a cool cat!

So while I struggle to hide my belly...

You'll strut around twirling your whiskers?

Don't forget, you own sons are looking down upon you!

What are you staring at? Shave them off!

Now!

Can I keep them until we're in Delhi? Do it now.

Didn't your cousin have a moustache as well? The one who went to Brazil?


Will you say something?

I really want to understand What your problem is, Nakul.

If you still haven't understood, there's no point.

Explain it, then!

Do you find it embarrassing that your parents have sex?

I don't want to discuss this. Don't you understand?

I don't want to either.

It's just that it's starting to affect us.

Reneé!

What?

What do you want?

Do you want your parents to take your permission - "Son, can we?“

Okay, I'm confused.

Suppose we get married...

How do you think we'd be in our 403 and 503?

What do you mean?

I mean, will we only discuss our kids' school grades?

Instead of Pink Floyd, will we listen to devotional songs?

No sex, no romance?

Because if that's your idea of being married, then count me out.

Honestly, that's not the life I want.

Sorry, sorry.

Here's your mixed popcorn.

You know, when I was six or seven, I was terrified of the dark.

So I slept between Mom and Dad.

Sometimes, I'd wake up at night and find them both missing.

I was telling you about Mom and Dad...

Obviously, they'd be In the next room. What?

They'd be in the next room!

I was too young. 80 I would get scared and start banging on the door...

Can you imagine?

Mom would always open the door...

And I clearly remember the look on her face.

What?

“Reneé, are you fine?" Dad would never come out.

Some 2-3 years back, I discussed this with Mom...

And we laughed so hard. It was so funny!

Man, how can you discuss all this with your mum?

Girls can discuss anything with their mothers.

In that case, I'm happy being a guy.

Locking my parents up and banging on the door isn't my idea of fun!

Very funny... You aren't as smart as you think.

Otherwise you wouldn't have been acting so juvenile!

Now I understand What your problem is...

What is my problem?

You're like a typical Indian man!

Turn your mother into a Goddess.

Put her on a pedestal.

And forget that she's also a wife and a woman with desires.

Hold on. Don't try to intellectualize this.

Put yourself in my shoes.

If your mom got pregnant, you'd know how it feels.

If my mom got pregnant, it would be a bigger problem...

See!

Yeah... Because my Dad's no more!

Pass the salt!

By the way, have you told your mom?

Not yet.

You can tell her yourself.

It's her 50th birthday tomorrow. There's a party...

And you're my special invitee.

You've got to come, okay?


Where did I keep it...

Bro, my tuition fee's due. Mom left without giving it to me.

'Bro'? Are you okay?

How much?

2500 rupees.

Man...

Looking for your phone?

What's it doing with you?

I don't have the cash...

Take my card.

What's the PIN?

Actually, give it back...

Come with me. We'll pick up cash on the way.

Here.

What are you doing?

Yeah, coming...

Mom didn't give me pocket money either.


Chotu, hurry up...

Here. You can clear my tab.

You still owe me a grand!

I've given you 1500, right? I'll pay the rest too. Give me a samosa.

Hey Gular! Come here.


Hi... How are you?

This is for you...

By 10 o'clock, I'm out... Lights out...

Without telling me. she... Thank you!

Ma, you want something?

Maybe this, later!

I'll just be back in a moment.

You have to try this cake. It's from this special...

Hello.

Flowers are allowed today, right?

Come, I'll make you meet Mom.

Hi Aunty. Hello, son!

Happy Birthday.

Oh thank you, they're gorgeous. Thank you!

In fact, this party's gorgeous.

That's all her doing.

Who celebrates birthdays like this when they're 50!

Mom, not again.

I'm not complaining!

Give him some cake...

He doesn't drink, no? So cake?

I do!

Boyfriend?

Don't diet, have the cake.

It's not too casual, is it?

How did you get so late?

You got out of office early saying it's your Mom's birthday.

What excuse could I give, my sister's wedding?

What date is it?

10th December.

Damn, it's Shanoo's wedding today.

You didn't even call?


That's Mr Chawla's son.

Go ahead, counsel him.

Come. Let's go for the photograph.

Shanoo, I'm so sorry. I really am!

Say sorry all you want. When you get married, I won't attend either!

I just got stuck With some office work...

Yeah, sure. Whatever.

Okay listen, your mom's here. Speak to her.

Nakul...

Hello?

The call disconnected...

Excuse me. Do you have a charger? Yeah.

My phone just died.

I'll put it on charge. Excuse me.

Sure.

- Nah“. Ron. How are you?

I'm good.

Shanoo, Granny...

God bless you.

You're going to America, right? Stay happy.

Granny, I'll call you from there!

It's okay, my child.

None of you bothered to call me from Meerut...

How will you keep in touch from America?

It'll be too much trouble.

Start the band!

Play the music!

At least let me give her my blessings!

Why don't you relax, Ma?

What did I say wrong?

Let's never invite the Sethis again.

They guzzled down all the wine!

Did you see him staring at his wife?

Kundan Singh! Put out the candles.

Can't host these parties anymore. It's too much.

Mom. I need to talk to you.

She's what?

How?

I think, how it usually happens.

So you think this is a joke?

It's no big deal, mom.

'It's no big deal'?

My God!

How can people be so careless!

No, I understand, I mean...

'A moment of passion' and all, but...

What about later? How can you not take any precautions?

Okay so, when they found out...

Was there time?

I'm not sure, but maybe there was.

Oh God...

Well I don't know What to say then, Reneé!

"Maybe there was?"

God, it's embarrassing to say the least, isn't it?

And the health risk? Did they consider it?

And the financial strain...

Especially when they're close to retirement!

And it's not like they're so well off...

Heights!

Do you realize who is going to bear the strain of all this?

- Ma... Nah“ M“ be tapped in this mess.

Reneé, if you're thinking of a life with him...

Then have no doubt - this kid is going to be your responsibility.

Mom!

Look Reneé, I'm not saying Nakul's a bad guy.

He's a nice boy.

But his family, my God...

You know, his family is a circus I don't want to buy tickets to!

It's just so... It's just so uncouth, all this!

Can you imagine something like this happening in families like ours?

Come on, Mom! You're being really harsh.

Okay, but...

You're all I have, Reneé.

Nothing matters more to me than your happiness.

But think about it...

Would you be able to fit into a family like theirs?

They won't even let their son move to the US.

Won't they interfere in your life?

And now they definitely won't let him go...

Because who'll provide for them otherwise?

I had forgotten my phone.

Aunty, just a minute. Nakul!

No... Please.

I'm sorry Aunty.

You were saying such nice things about my family... I just eavesdropped.

Then again - in families like ours, listening in on others is quite normal.

It is normal, yeah.

In fact, I'm glad I heard what you said.

I just realized that I was pointlessly getting embarrassed about Mom's pregnancy.

Why bother?

After all, our family's already such an embarrassment!

That's what you said, right?

Not a family but... what was the word?

Circus. Circus!

Nakul, don't do this. You're drunk.

At least let me talk?

Is this the way to talk?

Well, that's how we talk in my family, isn't it?

We're a nosy bunch.

By the way, about the interference... you were bang on!

My parents have issues with me going to the US...

I have issues with their relationship...

After all, what kind of man loves his wife- it's so not classy!

Better flirt with the neighbour's wife, right?

Oh please...

Just a minute, Aunty - I'm not done yet.

Nakul, don't misbehave.

It's okay, let him speak.

Hmm.

So kind of you, Aunty.

You said I'm a 'nice guy'... right?

That's Where you got it a little wrong.

If I were a nice guy, I would've stood by my parents.

If I were a nice guy, I would've been happy for the baby.

Because I know my parents will give it all the love in the world.

And for whatever else it needs, I'll be there.

Because Whether it's a brother or a sister, it'll be mine.

Done?

Yeah... I guess.

That's all for now.

I'll email you the rest.

I'll take down your ID.

Goodnight, Aunty.

Nakul...

Nakul!

You can't talk to my mom like this.

Why? Why can't I?

After all she said about my family, why should I keep quiet?

She was talking to me, not to you.

How does it matter?

That's what she really thinks of my family, isn't it?

You've got to apologize to her.

Balls.

Don't do this, Nakul.

I'm telling you.

Yeah, I heard you.

Now what?


Have you gone deaf? I've been ringing the bell since half an hour!

I'm not a doorman!

Shut up, or you'll get it from me! I'm already pissed.

Go ahead.

Hit me!

Show me. What's that under your eye?

Who did it? Tell me...

Will you tell me or not!

There's this guy at school. Sumit Malik.

Hey Gular. Oi!

What's this I'm hearing? You should talk to your Dad, dude...

At this ripe old age... He's still dirty dancing with your mom?

Speak up!

Should he be doing it with your mom, then?

You've got neither brains, nor balls!

Look at your face! Couldn't even put up a fight...

Come. Let's go to his place and beat the shit out of him!

What about the other guys who were there?

The thing you told that guy...

I said the same thing to someone else.

Not that Dad's left us with much to say.

Is that why you're drinking?

Will you have some?

I could try it...

You want to drink, you son of a gun?

Don't get my Dad into it!

Why, is he only your Dad?

Is he not my Dad too?

"Don't get my Dad into it!"

Enough is enough, Gular...

No more hiding.

How about you...

How about you go to my...

How about you go to my Daddy!

Hey Nandu, rub lime on it, dude!

Hey there, big boy!

You're Sumit Malik, right?

Yeah, you got a problem?

Don't you hang outwith Rathi, the student leader?

Yeah.

He's a chatty fellow, isn't he?

Didn't he ever tell you about Nakul Kaushik?

Didn't he mention how many skulls we cracked in our school years?

You know he's my brother, right?

Actually, I...

Does Rathi know you hit him?

I stopped getting into fights only cause Mom said so.

But you're talking shit about my parents!

Itching to get into trouble?

Gular, come hit him.

Sorry, bro!

And his cap must fly off. Sony, bro!

Didn't cut it.

Give me the bag.

He won't mind. He's a cooperative kid.

Look Gular... If his cap doesn't come off this time...

I'm gonna thrash him, and you too.

Hit him!

Lower your hand!

Bro... Did I hit him hard?

His ears must be still ringing.

Tell me something. What?

Have you thought about it...

Whether it'll be a boy or a girl?

Not really. What about you?

Me neither. What's the point, anyway...

Did you ever imagine we'd be discussing this!

Hey! Hey Nakul, Nakul!

Come on, here!

He's here, finally!

Congratulations and celebrations...

Congrats, big brother!

You went into hiding, dude!

Yeah man!

At least celebrate the good news with your friends!

Why keep it all to yourself, eh?

After all, happiness multiplies when it's shared, right?

Uncle! Have you congratulated our friend Nakul yet?

What for?

Our buddy Nakul is going to be a big brother again!

Congratulations, Sir!

Go on Junney, roast me.

What are you looking at, rascals!

Junney's proven this today...

Among all of you, he's my best friend.

My dearest!

Look at him... he's so happy about the baby!

Even though he can never father one himself!

It's okay Junney, don't worry...

You're like a brother to me! When you get married... Send your wife to me.

It's the least I can do for you.

Actually, you don't need me...

How about you go to my Daddy?

Uncle, make him a sweet paan!

Have a seat!

What are you drinking?

Cumin water.

Oh yes, tea causes acidity.

Here, take your pick.

He took me to Delhi to shop for sarees.

But they were too dull. I didn't like any of them.

We bought these from the local store.

Look, how lovely they are!

I've already chosen mine.

Ma!

Ma!

This is for you!

Why Priyam, are they not classy enough for your taste?

No Jiji, it's not like that...

No, it's okay...

You've turned very modern living in the big city, haven't you?

Everyone was talking about you at the wedding.

Look Priyam, we're past the age to taunt and bicker.

But you should have thought about the family's reputation, no?

Even Shanoo's mother-in-law asked me about Priyam...

I was so embarrassed!

You need to think of how it would impact the kids...

What people would say...

The boys didn't turn up for their sister's wedding out of shame!

And what values will they receive?

Ah! You're one to talk about values, Guddan!

Don't values tell you to take care of your old parents?

Did you do it?

And you, sitting there like a high priestess!

Tell me, do you even know what medicines I take?

In fact, do you even know about my ailments?

Last year, when I was in hospital...

Did any of you visit?

Ma, we did come once...

Wow, I should be eternally grateful!

When I was sick, crapping and pissing in bed, were any of you there?

She was there. She took care of everything!

Let it go, Ma.

Shut up!

She washed and bathed me, cleaned my bed...

Got a folding bed and stayed with me all night...

And you'll teach her about values!

I've come here after so many years...

Did any of you even ask...

If I'd like to stay on for a few days after the wedding?

And you talk about family!

She's selflessly cared for our family and never uttered a word!

Enough, Ma...

Let me speak, Priyamvada!

Very concerned about Nakul and Gular, are you?

I say, it's good they didn't come for the wedding!

Listen! Ma's exploding inside. Hurry!

What happened?

Is it a crime for a husband and wife to be in love?

No, tell me! Ma!

Now that Shanoo's married...

...in a year you'll start pestering her to have a baby!

Are babies born out of thin air?

Without having sexy?

Aunty, it's not 'sexy', it's sex!

Who the hell are you? Get lost!

Take him away!

Ma, what are you doing...

The atmosphere will be ruined...

Jiji, you both go... I'll speak to Ma.

It's her medication... it gets to her head.

Bhabhi, calm down...

Ma, at such an occasion... Why spoil the festive mood?

Ask her... Did I start it?

Even since I came here, I've been noticing their attitude.

And today, Guddan questioned Priyamvada's values!

Ma, how does it matter what she says?

No, Jeetu! Listen to me.

Yes, I'm listening. Please calm down. Sit, relax and tell me.

Your father - may his soul rest in peace...

He didn't make one good decision in his life...

He got you engaged Without my approval...

Ma...

But luckily, God guided him...

And made sure he left someone to take care of me...

Such a wonderful daughter-in-law...

I've never praised her before...

But I had to say it today.

Jeetu, take me back home.

And don't you dare hold a grudge against my grandsons!

Absolutely not, Ma. No grudges.

You calm down, please. Okay?

Will you have some water? Yes.

I'll get you water. Okay.

Sit down.

God bless you.

You get a live feed directly on your smartphones.

In a nutshell, what we are saying is that...

...with Godrej's Eve-home cams, you can watch over your loved ones...

...from anywhere, at any time.

Fabulous. Works for me. Guys?

Yeah,fine.

So, the campaign's final...

Let's all go out for a drink?

Sure, sure.

Reneé?

Not today. I have some work.

Listen...

Is there some tension between you guys?

See you guys.

You're coming to the party, right?

Mom and Dad are back.

Where's Mom?


Mom?

Have you eaten, son?


Go, meet your Grandma and Dad.


Bless you, my son.

Your mother was so stressed, she didn't smile the entire wedding.

Ma, your medicine. I'll get you some water.

Dad...

Sorry.

See, your father's such a softie inside! A true poet.

He's taken after you, Grandma.

Yeah, and they look so alike too.

The only difference is the moustache.

But your Dad doesn't even have a moustache!

But you do, Grandma!

The heartbeat's completely normal.

Perfectly healthy baby.

It's getting cold...

Are you Malayali?

Are you having a baby too?

Good, very good!

You're at the right age.

We got a little late!

7 months, 2 weeks...

Actually, also 2 minutes.

Just kidding!

What about you?

No, actually...

Nakul! Let's go, son.

Yes, mom.

We're not so late, actually...

We can still pay the installments on our house.

Looks good, right?

Is she kicking?

How can you say it's a she? It could be a boy as well.

It's going to be a girl.

How do you know?

Are you happy?

Extremely.

- Nah“? Yes?

Son... Renee' and you don't go together anymore?

No.

My beloved...

My beloved...

Without you beside me My days and nights feel lifeless

My beloved...

Emptiness fills up My promised destinies

My beloved...

Without you beside me My days and nights feel lifeless Emptiness fills up My promised destinies As we walk together to eternity As we walk together to eternity Don't turn and leave midway What if our eyes never met? What if you looked away...

What if our eyes never met? What if you looked away...

Please, for the love of God

Please, for the love of God Don't break my heart this way What if our eyes never met? What if you looked away...

What if our eyes never met? What if you looked away...

My beloved...

For the ones marred by separation Tears rain down those eyes The one who has loved and lost Keeps searching for his forever The one with a broken heart

The one with a broken heart Searches for its missing part What if our eyes never met? What if you looked away...

What if our eyes never met? What if you looked away...

What if our eyes never met? What if you looked away...

What if our eyes never met? What if you looked away...

What if our eyes never met? What if you looked away...

What if our eyes never met? What if you looked away...

Not getting sleep?

Want to take a stroll?

You guys had a fight, didn't you?

You should apologize.

Why should I apologize, tell me?

She's bound to be upset, isn't it?

If someone spoke to me that way, wouldn't you be angry?

But then it'll look like I was at fault.

There's no point being adamant, son.

You'll keep holding onto this, and she'll move on to someone else.

If you can't do it, tell me... I'll speak to her.

Listen to me.

The baby shower's coming soon. Go give them an invitation.

So...

Should I give her the card in office tomorrow?


Aunty, well...

I don't really know where to begin.

So let me just start by saying sorry.

I'm genuinely extremely sorry, Aunty.

I don't know if me coming here and apologizing makes any difference...

Renee and I haven't been on talking terms lately.

The way I spoke to you that night, it's not done...

I'm really embarrassed about it.

I don't want Renee to feel embarrassed because of me.

I don't want her to feel ashamed about introducing me to you.

I know she's disappointed in me.

And that's why I'm here to apologize.

I'm not such a bad guy, Aunty...

And my family, my parents... they're also not bad people.

They're very simple, normal, genuine people with middle class values.

They're good human beings.

And I really hope I become like them one day.

Anyhow, this is for you.

The Baby Shower invite.

Actually, mom wanted to give it to you personally, but you know, she's...

So Aunty...

...if you can forgive me, please do come.

And if possible, get Reneé along as well.

I need to say sorry to her too.

So yeah.

Thanks for hearing me out.

I'll take your leave.


Straighten it!

Upstairs, on the first floor.

Gular!

The wires are getting tangled.

Move it to the side... yeah, that's it.

Switch it on.

Is it fine? Perfect.

Carefully...

Jeetu...

Now my only prayer to God is that you have a boy.

The holy trinity will be complete.

Brahma, Vishnu and Shiva!

Do either of them look like a God to you?

They're little demons, your grandsons!

Hush! What nonsense!

Ma, whether it's a boy or a girl... it should be healthy.

And to tell you the truth...

I'm hoping for a daughter this time.

Babli?

Wait, wait, stop!

What's happening?

Doctor...

One minute... Nakul!

Come here quickly, son!

How's Nakul?

Fine, I guess.

Why, you guys don't meet in office?

No.

Because of his mom... he often works from home.

He was here this afternoon.

He spoke less today...

But he spoke well.

Like I always said...

He's not a bad guy.

In fact, he's rather nice.

Are you going to keep staring at my face, or will you call him now?

Carefully, down the stairs...

What are you standing there for? Open the door!

Carefully...

Keep your right foot first...

Hurry up!

What are you doing? Sit at the back with mom! I'll drive.

You get Grandma and come.

Why do we need Grandma there?

Why don't you tell her that!

Babli, is everything okay?

Nakul, keep me posted!

He's not picking up his phone. I'll go see him.

Nakul, drive faster.

Babli? Don't worry... We're almost there.

I'm scared...

It's going to be fine. We'll be there any minute.

Carefully...

Take it easy on the turn!

Babli, it's okay... Wait, I'll open the door.

Hold it from there. Carefully...


Are you here to meet Nakul, dear? Yes.

He just took his mother to the hospital.

Thank you, Aunty!

I've filled the form, I'll make the payment.

Nakul! Where's Mom?

She's in the emergency ward. It'll take some time. You please sit.

Dad!

Is everything fine?

Her water just broke.

The senior doctor is on her way.

They say they need to operate.

Operation?


What did she say? Nothing...

Tell me! It's nothing important.

Come on, tell me!

She was asking if you want to go and shoot a video of the delivery.

Shameless!

How can you suggest something like this to your father?

People do it nowadays. What rubbish!

Mom!


Who's that? Nakul's chick!

I mean, his friend.

Congratulations... it's a baby girl.

We were a bit concerned because the baby was premature...

...but she's absolutely healthy. Absolutely fine.

The mother's doing fine too.

We'll shift both of them to the ward shortly.

Babli?


How are you feeling?

I'm fine.

How does our little doll look?

She's coming. See her for yourself.


Holding you warm in my arms I'll pamper you with endless love May you have the brightest dreams As I sing you sweet lullabies

I pray that you live a hundred years I pray that you live a hundred years And upon myself I'll take your pain

Holding you warm in my arms I'll pamper you with endless love May you have the brightest dreams As I sing you sweet lullabies


Come Nakul, let's take a selfie.

Reneé dear, come join us.

Come.

Jeetu... Now that we're in hospital, you might as well get operated too...

Or we might end up here again next year!