Beastly (2011) Script

ANNOUNCER: And the next candidate for Buckston High School Green Committee President, Kyle Kingson.


True or false.

You are an aggressively unattractive person.

Hatchet-face, face-ache, a face like burnt Lego?


Or did you only just miss the beauty boat?

Any which way, best embrace the suck.

Beautiful people get it better.

That's just the way it is.


So, so, what does this got to do with running for Green Committee President?

Not much, except you'll never elect me 'cause of my commitment to the environment.

I don't have one.

I just want this for my transcript.

(STUDENTS LAUGH) But what you got to ask yourselves is should you vote for me just because I'm the rich, popular, good-looking guy with the famous news-anchor dad.

And the answer is, "Hell, yeah!"


Palm of your hand, man. Palm of your hand.

Stellar Angels in America essay.

I appreciate all the extra time you spent with me, Mr. Bernstein.

(CLEARS THROAT) You hate that teacher's guts.

Whatever it takes, man, till the college recs are in.

Speech killed.

Speaking of killing, you see that ball-biting, voodoo-tatted slut?

But really, who gives, okay?

Stick to my mantra, "Steer clear of the witch."

I'll put it out of your head later.

What the...

Maybe it's just me, but shouldn't whoever runs the Green Committee actually care about things green?

Or be green like the rest of your facially-disabled coven.

KENDRA: Throw it to someone deserving.

Lindy Taylor's only going for treasurer

'cause she knows she can't win president against you.

No, no, no, I...

But I think we're all hoping that in the privacy of the voting booth, your bandwagoners will stop fearing for their social lives and make the right choice.

And might I just add, wow, looks are important to you.

They're important to everyone. Except you, clearly.


Appreciate the smear campaign, and kudos to you and your bitchcrafty friend for trying to stage a little coup, but if you wanted prez, you should have just had the...

Actually, I don't want prez, I don't know Kendra, and I don't let others speak for me.

But maybe that's just me being the defensive scholarship kid.

So, best of luck tomorrow.

And it's nice to finally meet you after three years.


And how are you?

Not bad.

The election's today. Great.

No, not you, I was talking to my son.

Did us proud.

Yeah, all right.

I experimented with fireworks, too.


Uh, wait, hold on. Jill, I gotta go.

Hey, I'm sorry. Jill got canned.

Yeah, it's probably the way the baby ten looked on camera.

But, you know, she was a big-boned girl to begin with.

People like people who look good.

Anyone who says otherwise is either dumb or ugly.


Who's Jill?

I told you about her.

I don't think so.

And I know this 'cause the last time we had a conversation that lasted more than five minutes was in sophomore year.


ROB: Why don't you leave me alone?

When I told you I had brain cancer.





Oh, shoot. Hang on.

Rob Kingson.



ZOLA: I say good night.

Why, 'cause you need to get home to your 16 children?

My three children live in Jamaica with their father, which you know.

Do me a favor.

Save the sob stories for your heart-to-hearts with Mr. Clean.

(CHUCKLING) You no vex me, you stoosh ginnygog.

ANNOUNCER: And next year's Green Committee President, Kyle Kingson.


Don't think it was a landslide if it makes you feel better.

And I'm sorry.

Is "bullshit" one word or two?

No, it's not, and I want to make it up to you.

I got two green party VIP dance passes.

Scores you green room access, that kind of thing. You want one?

What's the catch?

No catch.

So I'd be, like, going with you?


What about your girlfriend?

Deep-fried Barbie doll. She dumped me last night.

Hey, I don't know what game this is, but I'll play.


Everyone deserves a second chance.

Besides, you know what people say about me, don't you?

Vicious gossip.

Mmm. And only idiots screw with witches.

Careful now.

Tell me you did not get a cheap-ass rose.

Them no have the orchid.

They didn't have it? I asked you two weeks ago to order it.

You tell me yesterday.

But listen,

"A symbol of humility, the white rose

"also say, 'I'm loyal and worthy of you."'


And it also means I'm loyal and worthy of you.

Go blow a goat!

KYLE: I'm sorry. The orchid was this year's yellow ribbon.

It was a political statement.

Thank you for making me look like an insensitive bitch!

I mean, does it suck so bad?

No. It's bad-ass.

Did I ever congratulate you on treasurer?

I probably never apologized for my a-holian election behavior either.

(SCOFFS) Well, two weeks ago was the first and last time you spoke to me in three years, so, um, no.

Sorry on all counts.

Got to slave here all night?

Slaving all year.


Yeah. I'm saving for the Machu Picchu trip.


But my shift's almost over.

Just in time for the real fun.

(LAUGHS) Yeah, right.

She blows it off? Too cool for school?

Definitely not. Just...

Not your thing?

Well, that, and...

Well, that. (LAUGHS)

What can I say? I'm substance over style.

A dying breed.

It's never too late to join.

I think I already drank the Kool-Aid.

Always hope.

Take a picture with me.


School newspaper.


But I'll need to approve it before it runs.

Hold up.

What else will I do... "I'm worthy of you."


It's what white roses mean. (LAUGHS)

It's lame-core, I know.

And obviously not what I thought you meant.

No, it's just...

See you later.

Don't be a stranger.

What's with her?

Pity mack.

'Cause you got a flesh-eater at your four o'clock. (CLEARS THROAT)

And here we go.

You actually bought it.

You bought that I'd hook up with you, the self-mutilated, tatted Frankenskank who publicly humiliated me and almost cost me the election?

No dice, sunshine.

But hey, you can always buy a ticket.

Or here's a secret.

Sometimes they let you in just 'cause you're eye candy.

Is she eye candy?

Rules are she needs a ticket.


Que será, será. Spanish for, "Sucks to be an ugly cow."

I only came to give you a second chance.

Guess I blew it.

I guess so. But Kyle?


(ECHOING) Best embrace the suck.


Relax. Kyle, I already forgave you. Come on.

God, you are sweating like a pig. Come on.

You see the way she looked at me?

So what?

I got to go. Kyle.





How are you feeling, Kyle?


(STAMMERING) What are you doing here?

I'm here for everyone who just missed the beauty boat.


And all the self-mutilating, tatted Frankenskanks.

It was a joke.

I didn't get it.

But pretty soon you will.


You have a year to find someone to love you.

Huh? Before the tree blooms again.


When the spring flowers bloom again, the year is up.

What the...

And either the words "I love you" will release you from the spell

(WHISPERING) or stay like this forever.

Like what?


As aggressively unattractive outside as you are inside.


KENDRA: You have a year to find someone to love you.

Or stay like this forever. Or stay like this forever.

(ECHOING) Or stay like this forever.


KYLE: Dad?

Jesus, you scared me.

Don't turn on the light.

Why? Please.

What is going on?

Why do you love me?

What kind of a question is that?

Just answer it.

Because you're my son.


But do you believe in magic?

Magic? What the hell are you... Jesus!


DR. DAVIS: His vision and hearing.

ROB: That's all you've got?

And, of course, his insides are just as normal as they were before, but the skin won't change no matter what we do.

Now, what about skin grafts or face transplants? I mean, look at him.

Look at him!

He doesn't want to live life looking like this. We'd risk anything.


Kyle, we are going to find somebody else.

I'm not taking "no" from Dr. Crap-For-Brains. We'll fix this.

Yeah, because we'd risk anything, including me dying.

No, that's not what I meant. It just came out that way.

Or did it come out because that is what you meant?


Come on. I have a surprise for you.

ROB: What do you think, Kyle?

It's private, it's safe. People can't be spying all the time.

Plus, I'm thinking I might get you that motorcycle you've always wanted.

Where's your room?

It's right across the hall.

Don't worry.

I will take care of whatever you need.

Still need to get my stuff.

But we're still keeping the place in the city?

So I can crash there late nights if need be.



What is it?

Hey, hey.

Okay, I have a 4:00 call, so I will check in right after that.

And Zola's right here. Okay?



Who are you?

Mary Poppins.

The tutor.

Your dad hired me. I'm supposed to move in today.

Tell my father he can carpe diem in hell.

Happy to. Meantime, how about you cage the rage and invite me in for a nice, hot bowl of dad-sucks?

Saw right through that one, huh, Oprah?

Yeah, it's a little gift I have.

Especially since I can't actually see.

Hi. I'm Will. Come in.

I'll get Zola. She'll welcome you to hell.

Fix you up with your own bedroom, and explain what happened to me and what I did to deserve this.

And please, please, hang with us.

Gouge the old man for everything he's worth. He deserves it.

You know what? Obviously, he forgot to spin the borderline hostile act of hiring a blind guy to tutor his creep-show son.

As for learning calculus, I think I'll take a pass.

Nice to meet you.

Sorry. Me come back later.

How old are your kids?

Sixteen, thirteen, ten.

You just left them?

Can't get 'em green cards.

But you left them.

Parents do what they do with what they know.

Them weren't very big when me leave 'em.

It was five years.

For my little one, that's half him life.

There's a hole in my heart.

So I know your father will come.

I don't think so.

Rob Kingson. Leave a message.

It's me. Um...

Could you do me a favor?

I know we were meant to be rescheduling for next week.

Or maybe it was the week after.

But, uh,

maybe we should...

Maybe we should not pretend anymore.




KYLE: Kendra.

Kendra. Kendra.

I'm begging you.

Please make it end. Please!

I can't do that.

But I get it. I know what it's like to be ugly.

So you got me.

Five months is enough. I've learned my lesson.

You learned nothing.

Find someone who can see better than you can.

Seven more months for someone to say, "I love you."

Please make this go away!


That sounded like Kyle, didn't it?

SLOAN: Weird.

I suck for not writing him back.

I suck more.

SLOAN: Well, but honestly, with him gone, it's kind of a relief.

Like, I always felt like I had to be on and mean, like really mean, to keep him entertained.

TREY: I know what you mean. Let's just forget about him.




And I'm sorry to spy on you

(LAUGHS) spying.



But it does sort of feel like the death of romance unfolding before your very eyes, doesn't it?

Doesn't she have a boyfriend?

Yes. This is what I'm saying.

What happened to romance?

Sappy, soppy, longhand love letters.

And you really, really don't have to keep listening to me, by the way.

Thing is, you know that guy they're talking about?

They're way off.

And personally, I respect that he called things as he saw them.

Even if he did see them wrong.

But do you know what it really was?


He was a shot of life.


You're kidding, right?

How do you do that?

I went to this dance and some emo chick gave me a dart hex.

Bite me.

Oh! Hey, now you're up, want to learn something?


Be careful.

Lose your smarts, blondes will be making jokes about you.

My dad always said how much people like you is directly proportional to what you look like.

But they hated me.

High school unquestionably sucks ass.

You went to regular school?

At 15, my friends lost their virginity.

I lost my sight.

But, you know, living hell has its upside.

Like better hearing?

Yeah. And chicks dig blind guys.


Well, too bad they don't dig ugly guys.

How do you know?

Defying expectations, Blindie keeps up his bitchin' sense of style.

A holdover from my seeing days.

Point being, no matter what, how you look matters?

Point being, it's not about how others look at me.

It's about how I look at myself.

Mental Rubik's Cube, I know, but one day it'll make sense.




You have the humor of a marmot.

So, I heard someone sneaking in late last night. Where'd you go?

Isn't the good thing about having no parents that you have no parents?

Get off my back.

But, you know, since we last talked, I've been thinking, and...

Is there any kind of eye operation?

'Cause I saw, like, every doctor in the country.

Miracle only, but thanks.

So, where'd you go last night?

I went to see about this girl.

I'm so happy for you.

I didn't even talk to her.

Baby steps. You think you might say, "Wassup?"

The benefit of you being blind is you can't see how I should so never say, "Wassup."

Baby steps.

We must celebrate.

One, two, three. Wassup!


One, two, three. Wassup!


Here's a sandwich, Ben.


How's your dad? Staying out of trouble?

LINDY: Dad, I'm home.



Come on.


LINDY'S FATHER: I don't have it.

Come on, just hook me up.

Just another week. I just need a little more time.

VICTOR: No, I'm not screwing around, you sorry-ass addict.

LINDY: Dad, not this again.

LINDY'S FATHER: I'm sorry, Lindy.

VICTOR: Hey, shut up. And you get out of here.

LINDY: Victor, please. We'll get you your money.

Give me and my brother our money.



Where is she?

You... You killed him.

Your daughter for my brother.

Someday, I'll find her.

I wouldn't.

What do you need?

Come on, what do you want?

I want her.

I wanna protect her.

I can protect her.


Did you hear him?

If she stays with me, she'll be safe.

I don't know who you are.

But if she leaves...

If she leaves, cops will get these.


No, it's just too twisted.

So is killing a man.

What's she gonna think of you?


Zola, remember, "Hunter," not "Kyle." "Hunter."

Hello. I'm Zola.

Where is he? You can go.

I'm not gonna just leave you here.

With some stranger?

Son of an old friend. For your safety.

Bullshit. And I can take care of myself.

I let you say goodbye.

There's no need.

How am I gonna know you're okay?

You're not.

Deal is, I give up my life, my whole life, school, friends, everything.

And in return, you don't come see me, don't call me, don't do anything.

Just stay away.

I screwed up. I keep screwing up. I know that.

But I don't know what else to do.

You can leave.

So I'm here, okay?

Whoever you are.

You come near me, I Taser your ass.

So that makes two of us.

LINDY: Forty-three, forty-seven, fifty-three, fifty-nine.

I got you food.

Call someone who gives.

I'd really like to explain.

Please come out.






This time go to Barneys, get Manolos or whatever sick-expensive kind Sloan and her bimbots loved.

Everything you say to me about her, everything I see, tells me she's not the kind...

Prada, then. be bought.

I'm not trying to buy her.

You are. And she'll hate that.

So what then?

What do you know about her?

You must think about her.

Me know you see who she is.

Go on.


LINDY: It's like you don't even know me.

This whole thing is all kinds of mess. It's just a bad scene.

There's nothing remotely good and I miss everybody.

I miss being able to go out and get deli coffee whenever I want.

And the clinic. And everything that made me me.

No, it's way screwed up and he thinks he can give me a few presents and, like, that fixes everything.

I know it's just for a little while, but I'm hating it.

I hate missing school, hate my dad, just hate hating.

And I know it's life or death, but I've been saving for that Machu Picchu trip for three years.

You know, the first thing I did in my life just for me, just because I wanted to.

"Lindy journeys to a wonder of the world

"and finally seizes her moment and..."

Jesus! What's your problem?

What's with the mask?

I didn't want to freak you out.

Sure. The ski mask didn't freak me out.

I got you Jujyfruits.

Can I ask you something? Uh-huh.

Why am I here?

Because you need to be protected.

But I can take care of myself.

You don't even know me.

But my dad and your dad...

I know, his mysterious "friend from the past."

He wanted someone they couldn't trace you to.

He's scared out of his mind something will happen to you.

Because of how much he loves you.

Which he kept saying over and over.



Thanks for the Jujyfruits.

You're welcome.

The thinking thing killed.


KYLE: Dear Lindy. I've been thinking about letters recently.

The real kind. Longhand.

And how it's terrible that nobody's writing them anymore.

And so I decided to start one to you today.

Now, you're doing what?

Seeing if I can build a greenhouse.

She's very into roses.

Each color means something different, you know?


Well, they all kind of mean, "I'm the guy who cries at chick-flicks

"and sleeps with stuffed animals."



I'm not here.

Hey. I'm Lindy.

Hi. Will. A pleasure.

I heard the game. You a Rangers fan?


I knew it. Guys' gal.

(LOUDLY) Guys' gal.

Why don't you join me? Thanks.


What's with all the tools?

It's Hunter's thing. It's a structure on the roof.

Structure for what?

You ever see the 1954 Devil Girl From Mars flick where they abduct virginal teenage girls for breeding stock?

I'm just... It's a joke... Joke.

Sorry. I haven't gotten out much. I'm losing my social graces.



Hi. Will. Pleasure.

The building books belong to Hunter, an all-around, way-good guy who's contemplating building

(CLEARS THROAT) a greenhouse.

A greenhouse?





Very funny.

So, are we ever gonna, like, really meet?


Like, now? No.


You lived here your whole life?


Pretty recently.

I was living with my dad, but he's the kind of guy who can't really deal.


I wouldn't know anything about that.

And your mom?

Mine's dead.

I never knew her.

So, no Mom.

Screwed-up Dad.

It's too bad we have nothing in common.


LINDY: What's with the Korean TV?

You speak Korean?


Oh, really?

What are they saying?

"Bon appétit."

She did not say, "Bon appétit."

Oh, you speak Korean, too?

Well, I don't like to show off, but yes.

And Koreans do not say, "Bon Appétit."

She said the Korean equivalent.

Which is what?

"I hope you have a big appetite

"such that you scarf food and hurl chunks."

(LAUGHS) No, that's the subjunctive.

I'll take Mom. You take Perm-Boy.

Game on.

So, what's she saying now?

"I love you, but when it comes to hair, you are a clueless wonder."

I can tell you for a fact that is not what she said.

What mom said was...


I hope Will isn't your Korean teacher.

Do you... Do you miss school?

Like a natural-born wonk.

'Cause, I have classes if you want to come.

Yes. I'd love to.





Well, I guess, good night, then.

Hold up.

Pretty gruesome, huh?

I've seen worse.


We're having school today, but you need to make it seem like we didn't just start and I need to look smart.

Lindy's coming.


Shut up. What are we studying?

Don't worry. I'll come up with something graphic and humiliating.

No, no, no. I need to know what it is now. I need the answers in advance.

Uh, that's called cheating.

No, that's called trying to get a girl to like you while you look like the lead in a slasher flick.

Uh, Shakespeare sonnet. Obvious.

E. E. Cummings. Cliché.

What's cliché is the guy liking school to impress the girl.

What about the Frank O'Hara poem, Having a Coke with You?

How do you know that poem?

I Googled "modern poetry, impress girls."


But I need smart things to say.

(SCOFFS) Good luck with that.

I need another thinking thing.

Another thing Lindy will like. It's for this morning. Please don't ask.

When my husband wanted me to marry him, he would weave me baskets.

Yeah, I really don't think that's gonna work. What about chocolates?

Oh, no.

Come on.

She will like it when you are being kind.

Yeah, I suck at that.

When you're being yourself.

What, this self or the jerk I was?

The man I know you to be.

How'd you do it?

I just figured it out.

I love Having a Coke with You.

Shoot me now. What?

No, I mean, that's great that you know all about it and will have lots of smart things to say.

WILL: Blind man climbing.

Could you just hang on a sec? Thanks. WILL: Blind guy tripping.

You okay? Peachy.

KYLE: Zola, thanks for getting these.

And by the way, I'm up the creek.

It turns out Having a Coke with You is one of Lindy's favorites.

God, I'm looking forward to this class.


Here you go. How'd you know?

Deli coffee, very underrated.

As I've always said.


Long-time green thumb?

No. No.

Actually, my dad stuck me in this house so no one could see me.

And I thought I'd take the ugly and shameful thing and turn it into something not.

Of course, not everyone can necessarily see its beauty.

Just read.

"Having a Coke with You

"is even more fun than going to San Sebastián, "Irún, "Hendaye, "Biarritz, "Bayonne

"or being sick to my stomach on the Travessera de Gràcia in Barcelona

"partly because in your orange shirt

"you look like a better happier St. Sebastian

"partly because of my love for you..."

We be back, huh?

Oh, yeah, we be back. We be back. Carry on.

LINDY:"... in the warm New York 4 o'clock light

"we are drifting back and forth between each other

"like a tree breathing through its spectacles..."

"...and the portrait show seems to have no faces in it at all, just paint

"you suddenly wonder why in the world anyone ever did them

"I look at you

"and I would rather look at you

"than all the portraits in the world"

I need more time.

Magic can't be undone.

But I might have a shot if I had more time.

Can't, sorry.

Okay. I pissed you off. You wasted me.

But there's got to be something you can do. Come on, help me.

I can't. And I wouldn't.

You still don't think about anyone but yourself.


You're wrong. I do think about other people.

I think about Lindy and what her life is like and I think about a woman who can't see her kids and a man who can't see, period.

So he cares now?


Okay, I'll keep trying with Lindy.

But please give Will his sight, Zola her family.

It's the least they deserve after being trapped in this hell with me.

I'll help them.

If you succeed.

And Kyle...

Good luck.


I got your CDs.


Just some guy at my old school.

Kind of a jerk, actually. Really?

(CLEARS THROAT) Yeah, we were on this committee together, so that's why I have his picture.

I mean, looks-wise, he doesn't suck.

He knew it, too.

Same old, same old, jerks are exciting and my type falls for 'em.

Did you fall for him?

Not that I fell for him.

Every once in a while, you kind of remind me of him.

Not that you're a jerk.

Anyways, he disappeared.


It figures.

The addict's daughter falls for the addict.

So, you did fall for him?

No. I mean, I just... I talked to him his last night.

For, like, a minute.

You know, the truly ridiculous thing is, I might have, kind of, sort of, actually thought he, a little bit, liked me-ish.

Of course he did. Oh, please.

He was completely on the in and I was not, am not. That's why I like you.

Yeah, well...


Anyways, being on the in isn't all that.

Isn't that what people on the out say to make each other feel better?

Yeah. But it also happens to be true.

Something about him.


Underneath all the bullshit was... I don't know.





I mean, are you still into him?

Like you said, you don't want to be the girl who falls for jerks.

Yeah, but he's not...


He's a decent guy at heart.

That's what I'm thinking.

But still kind of wrong.


I don't know.

You know, that something underneath, it's catnip for sappy tools like me.

To be the one who uncovers it.

Do you want to go somewhere with me?

Usually, if I'm out this time of night, I'm looking for my dad, mace in hand, counting by primes.


It keeps me from getting scared.

Huh. Oh.

Fortunately, scary guy's right next to you.

(LAUGHS) So there's that.

What about when people see you?

They don't. I got it down.

I was good at blending in, too.

This way.

You taking me to the park?

You'll see. Come on.

The zoo?


(WHISPERING) Hear that?

The animals.

Water lapping.

In some nearby street, a man is whispering...

"I love you."

(WHISPERING) Do you hear that?


Somewhere there's a baboon scratching his ass.

(WHISPERING) Why are we here?

(WHISPERING) This place is important to me.

It's still here.

What is it?

When I was in kindergarten, my dad offered to take me anywhere I wanted.

We came to the zoo.

He bought me all the toys and candy I wanted.

And at the end of the day, he told me my mother had left.

I haven't seen her since.

After he told me, I ran away and hid in here. And saw this movie.

It's about this mother elephant whose two babies die.

Plague or something.

She misses them so much that when she's migrating back a year later, a year later, she finds her babies' bones.

Can you imagine that love?


I never brought anyone here before.

KYLE: Seven.






It feels like I've known you forever.




The sun's coming up.

I think...

I think I love you.


Maybe I should let her go.

At least she'll be safe in Machu Picchu.

She has been jonesing for that trip forever, even without being stuck here.

ZOLA: But every day, she like you more and more.

But not the way I like her.

Move your hands. My turn.


I don't stand a chance. She's still talking about running away.

And I know you guys want out, too.

Desperately. No.

Kidding. Kidding. Look, even if she does go on this trip, you still have a couple days to ratchet up the romance quotient.

Just try to put yourself in her shoes.

This is all so strange for her, but me know she'll say those words, "I love you."

KYLE: (SIGHS) It's just the year is almost up.

Just take her to whatever bad-boy country house Daddy's got.

Daddy don't got.

Just the lake cottage.

Just the...

Oh, for Christ's sake. Would you buy a fricking vowel? Go!

LINDY: (LAUGHS) Seriously?

After you.

So, are you dying of boredom yet?




It must have been so great as a kid coming out here.

My dad got bad reception down at the lake.

He could only take it for about forty-five minutes.

But those forty-five minutes, they were awesome.

My dad was a teacher.

You know, before my mom died and he lost it.

Do you miss him?

Not right now.

In the past few months, living away from my dad, not spending every second worrying about him, I mean, not trying to fix everything for him, just not totally losing myself.

That's why I wanted to go away on that trip in the first place.

I guess this cage set me free.

Is that a "thank you"?

Let's go down to the lake.


I've been writing something for you.

What is it?

A letter.


I'm sorry. This ring is only...


Uh, which hospital?

Okay, I'll call you back.

My father OD'd.

You have to go to him.


CONDUCTOR: All aboard!

Thank you. Go, go, go!

I'll call you. He's gonna be fine.

Okay, I'll call you. And as soon as he's better, I'll come back.


And everything will be all right.

And Hunter...


You're a good friend.

Don't. Don't read that.

Don't read that!

KYLE: "Dear Lindy. I've been thinking about letters recently.

"The real kind. Longhand.

"And how it's terrible that nobody's writing them anymore.

"And so I decided to start one to you today.

"And I'm going to write to you every day

"for a long, long, long time

"because I think I might be in danger

"of falling in love with you."


LINDY: Hey it's me. My dad is gonna be okay, but I really want to talk to you about your letter.

Where are you?


Look, I don't understand. You wrote me this letter.

Why won't you call me back?


Because I'm "a good friend."

What's going on?




KYLE: I'm out of time. ZOLA: Call her back.

Why, because I'm "a good friend?"


And not calling her back, what good that do, huh?

She even called me. Why won't you talk to her?

The last time I talked to her, she told me she was hurt.

And "hurt" is girl-speak for, "Call now, bonehead."

She don't know what to do, so she go back to school to go on the trip.


What are you doing here?

I had to see you before you left.

You wrote me that letter. I know.

And then you didn't call me back.

I'm sorry.

You knew what was going on with me.

I was being dumb. Yeah, Hunter...

I just was scared that you didn't...

Didn't what?

Love me.

And I didn't think you could. Because of how ugly I am.

And I should have known better, that that's not who you are.

You took one look at me and still said you'd seen worse.

Somehow, when I'm around you,

I don't feel ugly at all.

It's because you're not.

MAN ON P.A.: Attention all students. The Machu Picchu bus is leaving now.


You deserve it.

Nothing's gonna change while you're gone.

That I can promise.



I love you.

(ECHOING) I love you.



LINDY: I love you.



Sorry, I'm looking for someone. I don't mean to be rude.

I get it. Thanks.

And sometime, you'll tell me what happened to you.

I met someone. That's great.

She reminds me of you.

And she showed me that love can change you.

Hunter! Do you think love can change you?

Of course.

Then you'll believe the story I'm about to tell you.

Where is he?

It's about a guy, good-looking on the outside, ugly on the inside.

And there's a curse. Love changes him.

Everyone knows that story.

What if it wasn't a story?

What if it were true?


Can you imagine that love?

Can you?


It's you.

WILL: Wake up.

Wake up.

Wake up. Wake up.

It's a dream, right?

It must be.

But happy.

Very damn happy.


Mr. Kingson, your new intern is coming up in the elevator.

I thought you might want to meet her.

Just as long as she's easy on the eyes.

Well, she's a bit odd looking.

No dog faces, no dumpy frumps.

But her reference said no matter what you throw her way, she can always work magic.