Benny & Joon (1993) Script

By The Proclaimers)

♪ When I wake up, well, I know I'm gonna be

♪ I'm gonna be the man who wakes up next to you

♪ When I go out, yeah, I know I'm gonna be

♪ I'm gonna be the man who goes along with you

♪ If I get drunk, well, I know I'm gonna be

♪ I'm gonna be the man who gets drunk next to you

♪ And if I haver, yeah, I know I'm gonna be

♪ I'm gonna be the man who's haverin' to you

♪ But I would walk five hundred miles

♪ And I would walk five hundred more

♪ Just to be the man who walked a thousand miles

♪ To fall down at your door

♪ When I'm lonely, well, I know I'm gonna be

♪ I'm gonna be the man who's lonely without you

♪ And when I'm dreamin', well, I know I'm gonna dream

♪ I'm gonna dream about the time when I'm with you

♪ When I go out, well, I know I'm gonna be

♪ I'm gonna be the man who goes along with you

♪ And when I come home, yes, I know I'm gonna be

♪ I'm gonna be the man who comes back home with you

♪ I'm gonna be the man who's comin' home with you

♪ But I would walk five hundred miles

♪ And I would walk five hundred more

♪ Just to be the man who walked a thousand miles

♪ To fall down at your door

♪ And I would walk five hundred miles

♪ And I would walk five hundred more

♪ Just to be the man who walked a thousand miles

♪ To fall down at your door ♪ So we're planning our next vacation. I want Australia, she wants Italy.

I like snorkeling. She likes garlic.

All of a sudden, out of nowhere, she says to me: "do I need her?"

Jesus, Benny. What kind of a question is that?

Need? What does it really mean to need somebody?

Benny, fuel line.

Waldo, could you answer that phone?

Hello. I need a check, Benny. COD.

In a minute. Meet me in the office.

All right.

Put that out! I got a fuel line broke.

Hey, Benny. Joon's on the phone again.

I'll call back. Find out what she wants.

It's an emergency.

She says you're runnin' low on Peanut Butter Super Chunks.

An emergency...

The issue is jelly. You only like two kinds.

You either like grape or boysenberry. Which is it? All right.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, peanut butter. I know. Super Crunch.

I'll see you at six, OK? Bye.

Thanks for waitin', ma'am.

I'm afraid the best we can do for you is gonna be...

It's gonna be $750.

If you check around, you'll see that that is a really good deal.


That is a really very good deal, ma'am.

A little too good.

Let's do it.

Come here. Come here.

You're not doing yourjob! What is yourjob, anyway?

To clean this house, but not any more!

Get out of my sight!

You wouldn't dare, Joon!

What is going on here? Joon?

Mrs. Smail, please, let me explain.

Beware, the winds of reason shall blow stern.

What? I'm done, Mr. Pearl.

I'm done! The mule's turned to glue!

She wanders off unescorted. She has sudden outbursts.

She's simply unmanageable.

Mrs. Smail, wait. Please, let me talk to her.

I can talk to her. You can't quit on such short notice.

I'm sorry, sir. In Ireland, we have a sayin'.

"When a boat runs ashore, the sea has spoken. "

Come on! We can't play three-handed poker.

She's gonna be alone every day. I'm not leavin' her alone at night, too.

So bring her. She just paints and reads.

Yeah, and lights things on fire.

That happened once. I got a fire extinguisher. Just bring her.

Get your ass over here. Don't forget the Louis Prima record.

Remember, always play for keeps.

All right, all right, all right. Yeah, I'll be there. OK.

Joon, dinner!

Spaghetti and salad?

In that order?

What happened between you and Mrs. Smail?

She was given to fits of semiprecious metaphors.

She's a housekeeper, not an English professor.

She moves things.

She said you wandered off.

Did you leave the house alone?

Define "alone. "

You know full well what I'm talkin' about.

I can't be worried about you knocking another housekeeper into retirement.

First, it was Mrs. Larkspur.

A woman deeply and hygienically disturbed.

Her hair smelled. But then it was Mrs. Piltz.

Piltz? The answer's in the question.

Let's face it, Benjamin. Hiring housekeepers is not your forte.

Well, until I do find another housekeeper, you are gonna stick close to the house.


Now have some salad. By the way, I want you to come with me to my poker game.

Benny... Come on. You'll have a good time.

Web belt and buckle.

Classical Greek martini shaker.

Six turkey-feather darts.

I'll see you with a Deanna Durbin album.

Come on.

And I'll raise you with a stethoscope. Does it have little plastic earpieces?

What do you care? You never win, Mike. I don't want 'em stabbin' my eardrums.

Steering-wheel knob.

Salad Shooter.

'56 Plymouth tire iron.

Fold-o. You must have a good hand, huh?

No, I'm bluffin'.


Come on. You gotta play to find out.

OK. 150 feet of coaxial cable. Show 'em.

Full house. Jacks over fours. Oh, shit.

I thought he was bluffin'.

Will someone get some air to his brain?

He was bluffing about bluffing.

You're a real pal, Benny.

I got a solution to your housekeeper problem. You can have my roommate.

That's a terrific offer, Benjamin. Save you from the chore of Smail shopping.

Those places are such drudgery.

Montgomery and Smails, Smails and Roebuck, Smails-R-Us...


When did you get a roommate? Since last week.

My cousin pounded into town and life's gone from heaven to hell in seven days.

Just like the good Lord intended. 26 years old, he can't even read.

Spends all day polishing my plastic forks.

When you say he can't read, what do you mean? Like words?

Yeah. And he keeps me up all night watchin' stupid old movies.

My work's starting to suffer.

You install cable TV.

Joon, will you please glue your sequins?

Have we an internal sequin issue to deal with, Benjamin?

All right, can we make this the last hand?

Come on, come on. Play cards.

Two tickets, tomorrow night's baseball game.

One Pocket Fisherman.

Fold. Do you ever stay in?

Snorkel mask.

She knows how to rattle the day help.

I think we need to find someone more understanding than Mrs. Smail.

Tell me, how are you two getting along?


Fine. Normal. You know, fine.

Why? I'll level with you.

I think it's time you gave some serious consideration to a group home.

She already has a home. Benny, she'd be with her peers.

She hates her peers. She's quit the two day centers to prove it.

Look, all we need right now is a new housekeeper.

Well, I know of no one else. You've been up and down the list.

You might want to consider that there are some people more capable of handling these episodes than you.

I think that you two living together may not be the best thing any more.

I'm her brother, and I'm her only family.

And we've done just fine, the two of us, for 12 years.

Yes, but her stress level is always a factor in her display of symptoms.

Her agitation should be kept to a minimum.

Everybody gets agitated. Sometimes it's the only option.

Benny, don't get me wrong.

I'm impressed how you've managed this long.

But a group home would let her develop other relationships.

We don't know this, but what if she were capable of a job?

They'd encourage her in that direction.

These are very nice places... nurturing, supportive.

I'm not farming her out.

I have every right to be outside, Officer.

I have every right. Yes, ma'am.

May I see some ID, please?

Waldo, did you start that brake job yet?

Joon called. You've run out of tapioca.

She what? Oh, and the police will corroborate.

Holy shit.

Listen, Jack, you wanna go to the baseball game tonight?

Hey, thanks, Benny. Box seats.

Hello? Joon?

Time for your medicine, Joon.

Good night, Steve.

Hello. How's it goin'? I appreciate the deal on the engine.

No problem. Is it runnin' all right? Yeah, it's running great.

Good. So... can I...

Can I make it up to you with some dinner?

Some dinner? Uh...

Are you serious? Yeah. Dinner with you.

You know what? I can't.

I mean, I'd like to... It's OK.


Stupid. Stupid.

18-15. 17-16.

18-15! It caught the corner.

It was a foot off the table. It was not.

Juniper... Benjamin...

Don't underestimate the mentally ill. We know how to count.

OK, fine. 17-16. You can't give me what was mine.

You're trying to cheat. I'm not.

You're cheating. Joon, you're the one who's cheating.

You're all trying to cheat me. You're trying to cheat.

Yeah. I spoke to some of the guys on the staff, Benny.

Nobody wants to be a housekeeper.

I will. I'll keep tryin'. But I gotta tell you honestly, I don't think so.

Yeah. OK. Thanks.


OK, Stevie.

I mean, I can't even keep a goldfish alive. What chance do I have with Joon?

If somethin' bad happened to her, I'd...

I'd never ever be able to forgive myself.

A group home is the right thing for her, Benny.

Yeah. This is definitely for her own good.

Hey, it's for both your own good.

How much longer can you do this to yourself?

Your life is literally passing you by.

You're right.

You're right. What am I doing with myself?

I spend my life workin' on cars and takin' care of my sister.

I can't have a relationship without havin' to worry about how Joon is gonna fit in.

Once she gets settled in, you could actually take a vacation.

Travel a little. I can hold down the fort.


Benny, there's a whole world out there.

I mean, picture yourself on the open road.

Wind in the hair in the El Camino.

Highway stretchin' out...

What's that, up ahead?

A lovely motorist, stranded.

Carburetor trouble. Better investigate.

Yeah, right. I'm gonna be stoppin' every 15 minutes to call Joon to see how she's doin'.

OK, let's see. Black Sabbath, over there.

Is that a flashlight? It's a brush kind of a thing.

Here's a hat.

Where's the batteries? You didn't win batteries.

Those are mine. OK. Hey, guys, hurry it up!

Or we'll start without you.

I've been known to play a little cards.

Box of 30-aught-6 cartridges.

Medium-sized, green-haired troll.

Soap-on-a-rope, slightly used.

Cards? Three.

Cards? Two.

And the dealer takes... three.


Re-grout my shower. Blue grout.

I fold.

Shampoo my dog.

Lava lamp.

Paint the exterior of my house.

Hey, come on, slow down.

This is supposed to be reasonable stakes.

That's a see and a raise. You follow me?

You take my cousin off my hands. Wait, wait, wait. Just stop.

Benny's gonna strangle you guys. Chill out, Thomas.

Joon, we gotta go. Flush!

Full house.

Yes. Yes!

Benny, tonight's your lucky night. Mike warned her it was for keeps.

What? What was for keeps?

I lost.

What's in the pot? A cousin.

Rules are rules. Without 'em there's no order in the universe.

Don't you give me that crap. You took advantage.

Of your sick sister. A heart flush is a perfectly respectable hand.

Not respectable enough. Hey, shut up, Mike.

I am not takin' this guy home.

You have to! Remember the bet I lost last year?

When I had to re-plate your socket set, I didn't back out.

You can't bet a human being!

Oh, well, if you're gonna be a baby about it...

All right, Mike. You wanna play like that? I'll take him.

I may not be responsible for what I'm gonna do to him, but I'll take him.

Oh, man.

What are you doin', you jerk? Somethin' wrong with your car.

What'd you do with my hubcaps? I don't know.

I'm Sam. So I hear.

I'm Benny.

With an n?

Yeah. Two of 'em.

This is Joon. With an n?


You're out of your tree.

It's not my tree.

I think I need a beer.

Hey, Benny, wait a minute! Where are you going? Come here! Gimme a jump! Hey!

You're goin' with them.

Oh! God bless you.

Hey, pal, we're tryin' to work here, if you don't mind.

Oh, my God!

"I've been looking for my boyfriend. Have you seen him?"

"He's a cute guy with a little mole on his right cheek. "

Ruthie, a ghost come back to haunt you?

"Oh, Brad! Oh, Brad! Brad, please don't be dead!"

"I never got a chance to tell you what you meant to me. Oh, Brad, please!"

It's you, Ruthie Mallenek, co-star of The Prom Queen Mutilator with Dick Beebee.

You saw that? "He was mine!"

"He was mine!"

"No. Cindy, you're sick. You need help!"

"No, Cindy! No! No!"


Don't... Don't touch it.

It's paint.


Kirk Douglas. Van Gogh. Ear.

These are yours. You can sleep here. All right?

It's late. Let's brush your teeth and hair.


I can brush my own teeth, Benjamin. Fine.

Hair, too. Perfect.

Come on.

Oh! Oh, Benny.

Hey, Benny.

Thanks for the couch. Mike made me sleep under the sink.

Oh. You're welcome.

Good night. Good night.

Mentally ill.

Really? Yeah.

But, I mean, don't worry about it.

But just let her go about her routine. Her routine is everything to her.

Oh, and don't hang around her room while she's painting.

She hates that. No.

If she runs hot and cold on you, just ignore it.

That's just the way it works.

Listen, if she starts talkin' to herself, don't worry about it, but don't answer.


She sometimes hears voices in her head. That comes with the territory, too.

And... just make sure that nothin', and you know I mean nothin', happens to her.


OK. All right.

Having a Boo Radley moment, are we?

Morning. Hey.

This today? Yeah.

So... what'd you do with the cousin?

The bus station? The river? What? You throw him in the river?

No, I took him home. You took him home?

Yeah. To your house?

Yeah, to my house. What, are you crazy?

Hey, believe me, it's only temporary.

Great. Hey, maybe he can tell Joon about the group home, huh?

If I'm gonna do this group-home thing, I gotta figure out the best way to tell her.

Where's Waldo? Is he not here yet?


That's it. I'm gonna have a talk with him.

No, you're not. Yes, I am. What's his phone number?


♪ Too late to cry, she turned away

♪ I started pushin'

♪ I saw no future in this lack

♪ I started pushin'

♪ Pushin', pushin' forward back

♪ I was pushin'

♪ Pushin', pushin' forward back Ahh!

Too loud! Too loud!

♪ Pushin' forward back ♪ What?

What? Oh!


Where's Sam?

I didn't mean to kick him out. I mean, I didn't kick him out, he just left.

What happened? Did something happen?

He just... He just left.

He was... He was... in the air and, and, and... with a thing and... It was really loud...

It was really loud.

And I just kept seeing...

He didn't mean to do it.

Do it? What?

What did he... What did he do?

He cleaned the house.

And you kicked him out for that?

Maybe I should invite him back in.

Yeah. Before someone sticks a stamp on his head and mails him to Guam.

Some cultures... are defined by their relationship to cheese.

Is that a fact?

He can really cook, can't he?


Although, for grilled cheese, I might've used the wool setting.

That's what I told him.


What did he use? Rayon.

Silk would've been too soggy.

Cotton would've... Would've burned it.


Fortunately he consulted me before giving it steam.

I was against it.

I wish he could be my new Smail.

♪ The melodious songs of the blessed

♪ And our spirits shall sorrow no more

♪ Not a sigh for the blessing of rest

♪ In the sweet by-and-by

♪ We shall meet on that beautiful shore

♪ In the sweet by-and-by

♪ We shall meet on that beautiful shore ♪

Too bad.

What a shame.

Good night.

You need some help?

"Dear Mom, I've departed Mike's with love and gratitude and am now living with Benny and Joon Pearl, two devoted new friends. "

"Benny's predisposition to hypertense Irish monologists notwithstanding, he has given me a job as a domestic engineer and seems pleased with me so far. "

"Love, Sam. "

I didn't know I could talk like that.


Oh. Yeah.

OK. Thank you, Ruthie.

You're welcome, Sam. Let me know if you need anything, OK?

You don't like raisins?

Not really. Why?

They used to be... fat and juicy.

And now they're twisted. They had their lives stolen.

They taste sweet, but really they're just humiliated grapes.

I can't say I'm a big supporter of the raisin council.

Did you see those raisins on TV? The ones that sing and dance and stuff?

They scare me. Yeah. Me, too.

It's sick. They make them sing and dance so people will eat them.

It's a shame about raisins.

Cannibals. Yeah.

Do you like avocados?

They're a fruit, you know.


Do you got any avocados?


You're very pretty when you're off work, Ruthie.

Thank you. Maybe I should quit my job. Where the hell have you two been?

Don't worry. They were with me, running some errands.

Oh, hi. How you doin'? Hi.

Running errands? You ran an errand?

Yes, I did. I ran an errand.

They're both named Steven. One with a v and one with a ph.

Look, look, look! Ruthie's movie.

Yes. And she's staying for dinner, too.

Come on in. Come on in.

So why'd you leave? LA?

I wasn't that good of an actress.

Well, that's not how Sam tells it.

He's ravin' about you.

Well, he's sweeter than he is judgmental.

How long have you known him?

Sam? Uh... 72 hours.

Be serious. I am serious.

Really? I'm always serious.

I'm too serious.

D'you ever get to the point in your life where nothin' makes any sense?

Brad? Brad?

Quit kidding around. This isn't funny any more.

Can we turn this off? Can we just turn this off?




Why did you do this? You're sick.

You need help.

Let me... Don't!

He was mine. He was mine!

And if I can't have him, no one can.

Not even you. You didn't have to buy that same dress.

But you are my sister, Cindy.

I'm sorry about me and Brad.

We didn't mean to fall in love at the party.

It just happened.

Let's just forget it. There'll be other boys, other midnight swims, other prom dresses.

No! No, Cindy!

Try it again.

There's only two reasons a car won't start:

Either you're not gettin' fuel or you're not gettin' fire.

You've got fire.

I think you'd better let me drive you home.

Sorry. Thanks.

Here it is. It's right here.

Second job, huh? Yeah.

Gotta make those ends meet, you know.

This is just how I imagined your place.

Well... You wanna come in?

Or you wanna...

Oh. No.

I'll come in. For a minute.

Whoa! What is this?

Nice porch. Pretty nice fish Joon gave you.

Oh, yeah. Those fish.

Yeah, I was shocked. I was...

Nice fish. I mean, yeah... I never had a fish.

What? Not even as a kid?

No. Underprivileged childhood, I guess.

Downright un-American, if you ask me. Yeah.

You can have one of mine, if you want.

No, I couldn't possibly. They were a gift.

But we could share it. Like joint custody.

You could take it on the weekends.

What is this?

Sit down, son. You're makin' me nervous.

Wanna beer? Yeah.

You know what? I better not.

I gotta get goin'. I better get goin', OK?


OK. I'll take a rain check on the beer.

I got the doors.

Wanna go to dinner? Ever been married?

No. Yeah.



See ya. See ya.

See ya.

See you next week. Right. Thank you.

Benny, would you come inside a moment?


Who's the new housekeeper? The new...

Oh! This... friend just came to stay with us for a while, but...

Joon tells me he's a man.

Well, you know Joon, how flowery she gets with words.

So she's lying? I mean, is it a man or isn't it?

Well... Yes, technically.

He's really just a guy, a friend.

Where does this leave the group home?

I take it you haven't talked to her about it.

No, not yet.

The admission date is less than a week away.

But the thing is, she's really doin' fine. She seems content.

Let's just leave it at that for now.

Let me know when you want to tell her about it.

I'll let you know.

OK. Bye.

Hello. I want to help.

Ah. Wonderful. OK.

If you'd like to fill out this application, I'll be right with you.

Not so hard.

Wow. You actually have cuticles.

I know. That's amazing.

What the hell is he doin'?

Mashed potatoes.

So are you and Ruthie considering itemhood?

Are you?

♪ Benjamin and Ruthjamin, sittin' in a tree

♪ K-i-s-s-i-n-g

♪ First comes love, then comes marriage Get outta here! ♪ Then comes a little baby carriage ♪ I'm just takin' her out to dinner.

That's a good joke. Did you like that?

What time you got? It's eleven.

On the nose? Right exactly.

I don't think I've asked anybody the time before and had it been right on the nose.

That's weird, isn't it? It's right on the nose.

Do you... Do you want to come in for a while?

I, ...

I've got that beer waiting for you. Oh.

You know what?

I should probably go.

OK. Listen, um...

Can I... Can I tell you somethin'?


You see, my life is just real... complicated, and...

Gimme a break, Benny. I just offered you a beer, OK?


Why don't we pick up Ruthie and get some ice cream?

Yeah, let's get her. No.

Why? 'Cause she doesn't want to talk to me.

Come on. We should go.

Knock it off.

He is... He's incredible.

He's amazing.

Did you have to go to school for that?

No, I got thrown out of school for that.

Really? Oh, yeah.

Hey, listen. Why don't you guys go ahead?

I'm just gonna hang out here for a while.

Really? Yeah. Go ahead.

I'll see you at home, later.

All right? OK.

That was great. No, no, no.

Thank you. Thank you.


♪ When the road gets dark

♪ And you can no longer see

♪ Just let my love throw a spark

♪ And have a little faith in me

♪ And when the tears you cry

♪ Are all you can believe

♪ Just give these lovin' arms a try, baby

♪ And have a little faith in me

♪ When your secret heart

♪ Cannot speak so easily

♪ Come here, darlin', from a whisper start

♪ To have a little faith in me

♪ Have a little faith in me



I love you.

Me, too.

Don't tell Benny. OK.

♪ When the road gets dark

♪ And you can no longer see

♪ Just let my love throw a spark

♪ And have a little faith in me ♪

Did you see the way you had everyone in the palm of your hand?

You've got this gift and you shouldn't ignore it.

You should be doin' something with it. Like what?

I don't know. All I know is I looked at you and I said

"This guy is somethin' else. " You're special.

You're not some schmo like the rest of us, who do what we do because we have to.

You're blessed.

Benny? What?

How sick is she? She's plenty sick.

Now, I've been doin' some thinkin'. Because it seems to me, except for bein' a little mentally ill, she's pretty normal.

Do you realize you could be the next Buster Keaton?

I'm tellin' you, Randy. Listen. You've got to see this guy.

Tell him, Eric. He's funny.

He's amazing. Will you see him? Yeah, I'll see him. You never know.

Most of these guys just work locally, but the better ones I can book out of town.

You book 'em out of town?

All over. Detroit, Boston, sometimes LA.

Whoa! Really? Can you see him tonight?

I'd love to see him tonight.

Hi. Is my car ready?

How you doin'?

Come on in. Come on in.

Uh, listen, I want to apologize for the other night. That all came out wrong.

No. No, it's OK. No, I really...

How's my car? It's runnin' great.

Your fuel pump was shot. I threw in a new one. It's great.

How much do I owe you? Uh...

I'll tell you what. Give me $30 for the part.

I'm not gonna charge you for labor.

OK? Thanks.

Listen, if you're not doin' anything later, I just lined up this thing for Sam.

What thing? It's kinda like an audition.

Maybe his chance to make a living at all this crazy stuff he does.

Who knows? Maybe he could travel, play clubs. I don't know, you know.

So if you're not doin' anything later and...

I don't know, Benny. I got food to deliver, apartments to rent...

My life's pretty complicated right now. You know?

Thanks. Bye.

We'll lay out the whole routine right after dinner.

You know what you could start with? Remember the roll thing in the diner?

Who died and made you Ed McMahon?

What is your problem? This is his chance to do somethin', be somebody.

He is somebody. Yeah, I know, but he wants to be more.

You don't know what he wants.

I know he doesn't want to be a housekeeper for the rest of his life.

If you're worried about a new Smail, don't worry, we'll get a new Smail.

He's not my Smail.

Housekeeper, whatever.

We have to tell him.


Tell me what?


Joon... and... and I... are... you know.



Don't! Get the fuck out.

You can't throw him out. I won him.

You just settle down. Just settle down.

I love him! Yeah?

Well, you are crazy!

I am not crazy.

You see what we've come to? You see?

I hate you!

I hate you. I hate you.

I hate you.

Can I get you anything?

Tapioca. Tapioca?


Anything on it?




Hi. How you doin'? You're out late.



Do you have any tapioca?

Jeez, I've heard a lot of lines in my life...

No, no, no, it's not for me. It's...

It's for Joon.

Come on in. Yeah?



Yeah. Good, good, good.

I'm not. No, no, I'm not.

OK? All right?


Hold tight. OK. Shh. It's OK.

It's OK.

I am not! I am not! I am not!

I am not!

Agh! Shh, shh. Calm down.

Shut up!

No, no. No, no.


Joon, please, come on. No, it's not all in my head.

Sir? Sir!

Stop the bus, please!

Please stop the bus!



All righty. You wanna step out? Yeah, OK. Yeah, OK.

How you doin', hon? You think I don't know who you are?

I know just who you are!

So just leave. Leave.


My name's Shane. I'm a paramedic in town here.

We're here to help you.

Don't you touch me! Don't touch me!

Joon? Joon! Sir, stay back.

Look, I am going to see my sister. Would you please just tell me her room number?

Please, just come back in the morning. Let me talk to her goddamn doctor!

I'm sorry. She doesn't want any visitors.

Not you or anyone else.

She doesn't wanna see me?

No. And she doesn't want to leave.

Benny, why don't you go home? Get some sleep.

I promise I'll keep in touch.

I hope you're happy.

I hope you are happy with what you have done to her.

You just stay the hell away from my sister.


Wanna know why everyone laughs at you, Sam?

Because you're an idiot.

You're a first-class moron.

You're scared, Benny. I'm what?

You're scared.

I can see it. And I know why.

I used to look up to you.

But, uh... now I can't look at you at all.

♪ Come down off your throne and leave your body alone

♪ Somebody must change

♪ You are the reason I've been waitin' so long

♪ Somebody holds the key

♪ Well, I'm weary and I just ain't got the time

♪ And I'm wasted and I can't find my way home

♪ Come down on your own and leave your body alone

♪ Somebody must change

♪ You are the reason I've been waitin' all these years

♪ Somebody holds the key

♪ Well, I'm weary and I just ain't got the time

♪ Oh, no

♪ 'Cause I'm wasted and I can't find my way home ♪

I think Fred Astaire is the way to go. Yeah?

That's a good choice. Who was that woman in, uh, Roman...

Audrey Hepburn. Yeah. Sam, thanks a lot.

Have a nice day.

Can I help you? Yeah, I hope so.

Hi, Benny. Thomas.

How is she? Tell me the truth.

She's been better, Benny. You gotta tell me what room she's in.

335. But don't even think about it, Benny. It's a closed ward. No visitors.

No, we've gotta find Joon. Please. Thomas, get us in there to see her.

It's impossible, Benny. What do you mean, it's impossible?

Listen, I just need two minutes with her.

Benny, I'll get fired!

Thomas, I'm beggin' you, as a friend.

I'd love to help you out, but Garvey's gonna be in there to check on her soon.

My hands are tied. My hands are tied!

What room did he say?



What are you doin'?


What are you doin' here?

I don't think you're supposed to be here.

What room did you come out of?

Get the door. How'd he get past Security?

Hey, watch the door.


Look, I know you want to be left alone.

But you do not belong in here.

Now, how would you like to try livin' in your own apartment?

An apartment? Yeah.

There's an apartment available in Ruthie's building.

You'd let me live in an apartment?

That's up to you.

I'm through makin' those decisions for you.

Listen, I...

I'm sorry I was such a jerk.

And about Sam, I was wrong. I was dead wrong.

I scared him away. No, you didn't.

He's here.

He is not. He's here. He got me in here!

He's somewhere in the building. He is not.

You'd never let me have him.


Why do you hate me so much?

I don't hate you.

You need me to be sick.

Juniper Pearl's chart, please.

Thank you.

Hey, wait! Wally! Wait! Wait!

Put him down! He's mine. I've been lookin' for him.

Are you sure? Yeah. I'll take care of him.

Sam, you can't be in here. Where's Joon's room?

I've gotta see her. Come on, come on.

Give me a reason why I shouldn't have you arrested.

It's that one. Yeah.

See? OK.

Sam, where you goin'?

Benny, this is exactly what we were trying to avoid.

By now, Joon would be in a caring and controlled environment.

Isn't it obvious now that you two need some distance?

Why don't we ask Joon what she wants?

Sam, what are you doin'?

Hey, Sam, come on! Get down, right now!

I don't know exactly what I want.

I do know... that I am tired of everyone telling me what to do.

Sam, come on!

Don't touch that!

Sam, leave that! I'm beggin' you!

Joon, we want what's best for you.

I know that.


Sam, come down now!

You're gonna get in trouble!

I think I want to try living in my own apartment.

Hm... I don't know.

Sam, stop swinging!

But I'm willing to let you try.

I'll prepare the papers for her release.

Thank you, Dr. Garvey.

Come down! Sam!

Are you OK? Ouch! Ouch!

I know.

Me, too.

I'm gonna check you out, OK?


Haven't we tried this before?

Yeah, but my life's a lot less complicated now.

Is Joon inside? Yeah.


By The Proclaimers)

♪ When I wake up, well, I know I'm gonna be

♪ I'm gonna be the man who wakes up next to you

♪ When I go out, yeah, I know I'm gonna be

♪ I'm gonna be the man who goes along with you

♪ If I get drunk, well, I know I'm gonna be

♪ I'm gonna be the man who gets drunk next to you

♪ And if I haver, yeah, I know I'm gonna be

♪ I'm gonna be the man who's haverin' to you

♪ But I would walk five hundred miles

♪ And I would walk five hundred more

♪ Just to be the man who walked a thousand miles

♪ To fall down at your door

♪ And I would walk five hundred miles

♪ And I would walk five hundred more

♪ Just to be the man who walked a thousand miles

♪ To fall down at your door ♪