Berserk (2019) Script

I'm pretty sure it was Nostradamus who said the most massive stars in the universe have the shortest lives.

Just look at the "27 Club".

A bunch of famous people with shitloads of money, leads to boredom, leads to temptation, leads to shitty decisions, leads to total self-destruction.

You're not a slave to need or to God, fuck else is there to do?

Become a slave to something else.

If you know what owns you and you and you ignore it, life's pretty crappy.

But if you know what owns you and you let it, then life's fucking awesome.

Especially in Hollywood.


Freeze over in the winter, either.

Swimming is one of Hollywood's main forms of exer-

So yesterday, right, I buy this pack of natural chewing gum and the packaging has these big bright letters on it that say "Bright Green".

And all I could think of was bright green.

Like the words were just forced upon me like I have no other choice but to fall to the mercy of them.

And I realized, that's how my script needs to read.

Bright fucking green!

Evan, you're an actor.

You're not a writer.

What?

We're letting you go.

Wait.

What, why?

Is it because I wouldn't cut my hair?

Because if it's 'cause I wouldn't cut my hair, I could cut my hair if that's what you prefer.

Listen, your projects aren't going to happen.

You're not the leading man that we thought you were.

I don't understand, what did I do?

Every audition you've gone in on, you fucked up.

Your feedback has been terrible.

Because I've been writing the script, I've been finishing the script.

We represent you as an actor, not as a screenwriter.

Well maybe you could represent me as both because, I was literally just about to send it to you.

Is it finished?

Um yeah, it's closed to being finished.

It's almost finished.

Goodbye, Evan.

Wait, look, I just got to Raffy's.

We're making final touches today.

Look, it's just the business.

Nothing personal.

Please don't do this.

This is all I have.

I'm sorry.

But I'd be co-starring opposite Raffy Rivers.

His name could get it made.

We could shoot it this year.

You send me a completed script with the Raffy Rivers actually committed, and maybe I will think about it.

Okay.

Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You won't regret it.

I will have the script to you tomorrow morning.

Uh huh.

Goodbye, Evan.

138, 139, 140, 150, 160.

How does that feel?

Can you feel your own mortality?

How does that feel, dumbfuck?

Piece of a, piece of a, how does that feel, you piece of a fuck?

Can you taste your own mortality?


Evian, mazel tov, what's popping, baby? Hey man, how was it?

Man you know, just happy to be back to be honest.

Well that ding dong chime thing's new, huh?

Fucking stalkers, had to, man.

Yeah fuck, what was her calling card again?

You looked good today?

You smell good today.

That's some weird shit, man.

Yo my therapist said, all it is is just bad people looking for attention.

So fuck 'em.

Do you think whoever it is sees it like Romeo and Juliet?

Like some weird fucked up love story?

Yo, Leo was good in that shit.

But I don't know about the Romeo and Juliet shit.

But I'm used to strangers falling in love with me.

It's the weird fucking letters that, Yeah.

I can't get with it.

What's up with your eyes, man?

You've been crying?

You've been bitching up on me, hmm?

No, no.

I put eye drops in.

Oh, you've been getting high without me.

You motherfucker.

No, I came from the gym.

I had dry eyes.

Ooh, speaking of the gym.

Today is a juice day.

Juice day, but it's Halloween.

Fuck Halloween.

Man, all the refined sugar and shit.

Give you man titties, you don't want that.

Woo, I see you.

Don't even worry about it.

There's no nuts in that, you'll be fine.

There's chlorophyll in this shit supposed to get rid of all the mercury.

You know, I shit sashimi, so this perfect for me.

Well in Fukusheema too.

Mmm, fuck all the shimis.

Bottoms up.

Bottoms up.

Why would you do this to me!?

I loved you!

I fucking loved you and you fucked with me.

I didn't fuck with you.

It's all in your head.

It's not real.

Of course it's real!

Every little thing you do is real and it has a consequence!

You can't manipulate the wo...

You can't manipulate the world.

Commit!

Fucking commit!

Ahh, no, I can't.

It doesn't feel real.

How real you need, it felt good.

No, it feels fake.

Can you turn that off?

Sora, next track.

It's our second act turning point.

I mean everything in our character's life is supposed to fall apart here.

We're being too conservative.

It should feel impossible that he'll ever piece his life back together again.

Shit, you always do this shit.

Do what?

Right when we're on to something cool, you perfect the shit out of it till it's not cool anymore.

You wipe it till it bleeds.

Yeah I just want it to be perfect.

I want it to be Black Swan perfect.

Uh, no.

I'm focusing.

See, that's your problem right there.

All this umming and ahhing shit.

That's what makes you week.

Hey how the fuck you want me to commit to your script when you won't even commit to finishing the fucking thing?

You gotta commit to your choices, Evan.

Be impulsive, that's what men do.

No matter who you are or who you're playing, make a defined fucking choice.

Shit.

Throw a hammer at your problems.

I commit to my choices.

Yeah right.

Then why have we been going back and forth for two years on this script?

It's because I haven't gotten it right yet.

It's not right yet.

What happened to "Bro, help me out.

"You know, it'll be quick, nice little creative adventure."

Creative exploration is what I actually...

Man we could have finished this shit months ago.

We don't even have a title!

Untitled Hollywood Hills Project.

That's a shit title.

This is your first writing project.

Get your shit together!

Okay.

All right, I'm gonna get some of this weed.

All right, let's do this.

Come on, hit that shit.

Take a big hit, commit!

There it is.

So our hero needs to be more of a man.

Animalistic but fearful.

That's what I'm talking about.

So what's he gonna do?

He gonna stay, gonna fight?

Gonna do nothing?

Well my family's never been eaten by zombies.

My world isn't closing in on me.

I mean when was the last time you were truly afraid?

Like to the core?

Last night, my Uber driver ran a red light.

What did you do?

I gave that motherfucker a two star rating!

If we've never felt true fear,

true animalistic fear,

how the fuck can we be writing about it?

We finish it tonight.

And there's no nuts in this.

How low is the dosage?

It's a low dosage of weed?

Low, low as it go.

I know, these weed edibles make me fucking paranoid sometimes, you know?

Am I a friend or am I a friend?

I wouldn't give you no bullshit.

It's like elementary school shit.

El gato, chakalate.

So it's light, it's light, it's just, Light, light. Okay, okay.

Light is Michael Jackson's asshole.

Oh my god.

Mmm.

Los gatos chakalate!

Okay.

What's something scary we can do now?

I always wanted to jump off the roof into the pool.

Crazy to think how many people there are in this city, huh?

They're all competition.

The womb of pop culture.

Hey, what's with your shoes?

My stylist, she want me to break them in for this event tomorrow night.

I don't think the edible's working for me.

Imagine if Spiderman lived in L.A.

No fucking buildings to hide behind.

Paparazzi everywhere so no exclusive shots for the Daily Bugle.

That motherfucker'd be dead and unemployed in a second.

Spiderman!

You actually just ate shrooms, by the way.

Fuck you!


We're letting you go.

What?

It's just the business, it's nothing personal.

It's all I have, hello?

Nothing personal.

Please don't do this.

Commit!

You're represented as an actor, not a screenwriter.

We finish it tonight, we finish it tonight, tonight, tonight, tonight.

Why would you do this to me?!

It's all in your head.

Animalistic.

It's not real!

We finish it tonight, we finish it tonight.

You're fucked in the fucking head.

Why, why?

What'd I do, what'd I do?

Oh god.

Why would you give?

Why would you give me shrooms, I've never done shrooms before, I've never, I don't wanna.

Embrace it, man.

I don't want this feeling, I don't.

Yes you do.

You want this feeling.

This is the shit we've been talking about.

Come on, describe it, tell me what you see.

What the?

What?

What did you do to your hair?

You like it?

I fuck, I love it.

Yeah, Red Dragon, bitch.

Dude, whoah.

Blondes have more fun.

It really works for you.

Do you think madness drives ambition or ambition drives us mad?

You're saying some good shit.

We should write it down.

No, no, you know what we should do?

You wanna fill the pool with olive oil?

Yes.


Happy Halloween, Angelenos, that was the feature track from Huntley Thomas's latest film "The Rising".

In traffic, the 101 is at a standstill.

The culprit of the traffic, reportedly trick or treaters dressed as a pack of coyotes.

Hey would there be such a thing as zombie coyotes, do you think?

Is that like breaking a rule or something?

'Cause we should definitely have a moment like that.


Psst, finish it tonight.

Hello?

Raffy?

Hello?

Yeah!

Woo!

That's what I'm talking about!

Mission accomplished.

What?

Someone's in the house.

What?

Someone's in the house.

No one is in the house!

Someone's in the house.

I heard the, I heard a little girl and then I heard the ding dong chime, the ding dong chime at the door.

You are paranoid, man.

Just chill out.

Can you turn off the music please?

Sora, music off.

The fuck?

That shit is weird.

Let's call 911.

Give me this fucking phone.

You ain't calling fucking 911, you're high.

You call the police while you high?

We'll be on TMZ by the morning!

Shit.

All right, fuck.

Hello?

Probably just trick or treaters.

That's why I got a security gate.

To keep the little motherfuckers out!

Why do you keep a hammer by the door?

'Cause that's what gangsters do.

Sometimes I get scared.

Yeah I know I should have just got a nine to five, yeah.

But just wouldn't be...

Ah, piece of shit.

That pool light was definitely on, right?

Did you turn it off?

Because I didn't turn it off.

The fuck?

Okay wait, we're on drugs.

It's just a hallucination, right?

I mean we're on drugs, it's a hallucination.

It's your robe.

It's just your fucking bathrobe.

Whoah!

What, wait, what?

Okay, something's definitely out there.

Something's definitely out there.

Maybe that's what set off the front sensor.

Holy shit.

They're everywhere now.


Wow.

I mean that's the fucking hero.

That's what we've been trying to figure out.

He just needs to listen to his animal instinct.

He needs to channel his inner beast.

I mean if there was actually some stalker motherfucker in my friend's house right now, that whole fight or flight thing.

Front door open, front door open.

Front door open.

Oh my god.

Man, you should see your stupid ass face.

Matter of fact, you know what, let me show it to you right here.

Look at that!

That's Huntley, you idiot fuck!

What?

Our scary evening starring the Huntley Thomas.

It's his best performance yet.

What are you talking about?

Hunt, come on man, stop acting.

I know you got all the awards and shit but stop acting!

He's not acting.

Okay.

He told you.

What the fuck are you talk, what the fuck are you talking about?

I called Huntely over to fuck with us and obviously he told you

'cause now you guys are fucking with me.

You can't fuck a fucker, man, come on, Hunt!

Huntley.

Oh, fuck.

Fuck!

I'm calling the cops.

You're not calling.

Fuck, calling no fucking 911, you just killed Huntley Thomas!

Oh shit.

Are you sure he's dead?

Check the motherfucker's pulse.

God damn!

I thought it was your fucking, I thought it was your stalker.

I thought he was gonna come, I thought he was your fucking stalker, I thought he was gonna come back and murder you.

I called him over here!

Why did you do this to me?

I was trying to help you and you just killed the motherfucker!

I did this for you!

I thought I was fucking protecting you!

This is it.

It's that shit we was talking about.

That real deal true fear shit.

Oh my god.

We're going to jail, man.

Nah.

We're not going nowhere.

We're fucked.

I'm calling the cops.

Oh come on, fuck calling the cops, man, help me.

Now quit acting like a bitch, come on!

Oh shit.

Oh my god.

Fuck.

Oh my god, oh my god.

Jesus.

Oh god.

Fuck, fuck the motherfucker's heavy.

Ah shit.

Oh my god.

Okay.

Get it up.

Come on man, my whites!

Dude, what the fuck, it's a fucking couch!

This ball name, motherfucker!

Front door open.

Hey, baby.

How many times was it?

How many times did you fuck my writing partner?

Whatever it is that you wanna talk to me about, let's talk about it outside.

Shut up!

No, no, no, no, no, no!

Google yourself.

Come on, do it.

Come on, check it.

You're always on fucking Twitter.

It's all over the internet.

Who took this picture?

When you begged me to be your girlfriend one month ago what was the thing I said?

What was the one condition?

I told you to fucking never embarrass me.

When was it?

I can't tell if this is real or not.

Who's this?

This is Evan, Evan.

Hi.

We writing a thing together.

He's writing a thing with you?

I'm writing a thing with him too.

He's writing a thing with you, I'm writing a thing with him.

I guess everybody's fucking writing a thing!

-Bitch. you drunk.

Idiot.

It was one time!

Shit! Jesus, Jesus.

-Man, pitch this shit!

What?

Pitch her the fucking script!

Pitch it, pitch it! What?

Uh, our script.

We open on this eerie pool at twilight, the time's a mystery.

It could be morning, it could be evening.

And we push in slowly to reveal something lying perfectly still in the water.

What is that?

As we get closer, we realize it's the body of a man, face down, surrounded by his own blood.

Suddenly he starts thrashing around morphing into a zombie because it's a meaningful zombie movie.

That we want you to direct!

What?

What?

Yeah.

We want you to direct.

This is perfect for you.

I was gonna tell you about this.

You expect me to believe that?

This is the reason why I wanted you to move out to L.A.

We just, we just haven't finished the script yet but once we finish it, it's...

And you expect me to believe you?

You know how talented I think you are.

Baby, just put down the gun.

I promise you.

Now put down the gun.

I know you're the director but let's go outside and talk about it.

Oh shit!

Ah!

Shot me in the fucking foot!

No, no, no, no.

Police!

Open up!

You called the fucking police?

Fuck, when you butt dial 911, they still show up, right?

My call must have connected.

Put her in the closet.

What?

You fucking heard me, put her in the closet.

What about Huntley?

Front door open.

Is everything okay in there, sir?

Ah man, everything's great, yeah, yeah.

It's crazy, man.

I could have sworn I heard gunshots.

I heard those too.

That's why I called you guys.

Man, it's Halloween, it was fireworks.

You know the kids, trick or treat.

Trick, they got me.

You're Raffy Rivers.

Guilty.

Look at your hair!

Yeah, oh yeah yeah yeah.

It's a little something I'm working on.

Well you know what, officer.

I apologize sincerely.

But thank you for your time.

What happened to your foot, man?

A hammer.

Tis but a scratch.

Wink at me with your right eye if something's wrong.

Holy shit, look at that city.

Terrible view, am I right?

Oh get out of here.

You get out, that.

All right I just gotta tell you this, man.

Your movie Arrested Affair just happens to be my favorite fricking movie of all time.

Man, thank you sir.

Sorry.

I feel nervous.

Do I look nervous?

Oh no, sir.

Honestly I feel nervous.

Why would you feel nervous?

Because you're the police.

And you're in my house.

I have to ask you something.

Is that a chameleon?

That is a chameleon.

I dig it.

It is a freak show out there tonight, Raffy Rivers.

I'll tell you that much.

What do we have over here?

What's happening over here?

Officer.

Sativa or Indigo, what's your jam, man?

Oh, I've been shitting nonstop.

Juice cleanse.

What's going on?

What happened?

All right.

Whose marijuana is this?

Oh, um.

Hey, get your fucking hands where I can see them, both of you!

Shit, Jesus.

I was literally just gonna show you my weed card.

I'm just gonna show you my, it's medicinal.

Medicinal for what, what are your symptoms?

Uh, okay.

My symptoms are anxiety.

Sleep disorder, I can't sleep sometimes.

Incontinence?

What?

I'm sorry, man.

We live in California.

I'm just messing with you.

I feel like I'm in one of your movies, man.

Except my shit is real.

I'm also an actor.

I see the talent.

Thank you.

Thank you for saying that.

I can see it, I can see the talent as well.

Both you guys, I think we could play partners.

Raffy Rivers, Officer Duane.

Just call me Raffy, you don't have to say my full name.

Just Raffy.

Really?

Really.

We're that cool?

My man.

Well, go ahead.

Spark up, Raffy.

Am I right?

Ugh, don't mind me, let's do this.

Okay.

Burn out!

Light up!

Flame on.

I gotta tell you, just chilling with the two of you's, on this couch, Halloween night, pretty sweet.

Make my list.

It's cool, what is that?

It's a cool feeling.

Jesus!

Get up, both of you.

Whose blood is that?

It's um, you could be in our film!

What?

What?

Yeah.

The one we're writing.

You could star opposite Raffy.

Not a fucking cake! Really?

Hey, you put the gun down you can star in any fucking movie you want to.

Matter of fact, we can even figure something else out.

Huh?

What you looking at?

The fuck?

Don't move!

Don't you even fucking breathe!

Ma'am, Ma'am I'm coming.

Are you hurt?

No, no, no, no. Are you hysterical?

I'm fine, I'm fine.

What's going on here?

Nothing, nothing.

Everything is fake here.

It's Halloween, Happy Halloween.

It's fake blood.

I was just using it for my Halloween costume and I just spilled it everywhere.

I was gonna clean it before you noticed, sorry.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

Who are you?

Me?

Oh, I'm the director.

Of what?

Of our film, our movie.

Look at me for a second.

There's actually a part you'd be like perfect for.

For the Sheriff?

Yeah.

Is that what you were thinking?

Exactly, for the Sheriff.

You've got that real resonance to your voice.

These boys they stop maturing the second they moved to Hollywood, so.

I gotta train them to be men, you know.

Age them up.

So uh, tell me about this character, hmm.

What are we talking about, good guy, bad guy?

Yeah, he's the noble man of the film.

The noble man.

Yeah he traps a herd of zombie cattle ranchers in a barn.

He sets it ablaze.

But not before having this tragic stare-off with his former wife who's now a zombie.

He stares right down the lens right into her eyes hoping that she still recognizes.

But it's too late?

Oh shit.

The barn goes up in flames.

So he runs in after her convinced that all of this is just one big old crappy mistake.

And then what fucking happens?

And then she bites his face off and he dies.

Jesus.

But he does it all from a place of love and compassion.

It has love, story.

I wanna shoot it predominantly in white so you can get that uncomfortable fly on the wall feeling, you know?

Yeah.

Shooting whites.

Oh fuck.

Nobody move.

Is that?

Oh!

What the fuck, why would?

What the fuck, why would you do that?

You fucking kidding me?

You guys tied me up and put me in a goddamn closet next to a dead person.

You shot me in the fucking foot!

Well you'd both be in handcuffs right now if it wasn't for me.

Jesus.

I don't feel good.

You don't feel good?

You know what, I'm sorry.

My stomach.

Fuck you!

We could even figure some other shit out and looking down at his fucking penis, what the fuck was that?

Anyone who says they haven't sucked a dick to get ahead in Hollywood is lying.

I haven't sucked any dick.

That's 'cause you're a girl.

Ew.

Are you gonna make me do it too?

What's happening to him?

Ah shit, it's the, What's happening?

Chocolate cats, it's the high, he's coming down.

The come down?

The fucking come down?

This is why.

It helps for your nausea.

If you can't come down, you keep going up.

What is this?

It's a bag of dreams.

The best strain of magic mushroom known to man.

Can someone please go get some rope?

Why the fuck would I have rope?

Well I don't know, rope is an ordinary household item.

Not in a black man's house.

Okay, I'll drug him with these shrooms and then you can dump him somewhere downtown later.

That, that's brilliant.

Then he will think that he never met me.

This is all a dream.

Like a Biggie lyric.

Can we just tie him up first before we shove poison down his throat?

I mean he could be concussed, right?

That's your fucking problem, Evan.

You're always overthinking shit.

I didn't overthink!

Let me fucking finish, Evan, okay?

That's your fucking problem!

You're always overthinking shit.

It can be simple.

That's why we'll never fucking finish this script.

That's why we're in this situation we're in because your ass is an over fucking...

I didn't overthink throwing a hammer at who I thought was your stalker, did I?

Why are you fucking yelling at my house?!

Quiet now!

I've done it, it's done.

Now what the fuck are you fighting about?

He's fucking dead because of you.

Dead?

What's that word mean anymore?

I envy the word.

You put us all at risk.

You can't manipulate the world around you.

Oh, I can.

If you don't know that, then you're already dead.

No.

It's not your second act turning point.

Yeah, that's what I thought.

It sounds fake, right?

Yup.

Yeah, it sounds fake. Yeah.

Okay.

I think it needs more action, you know?

Just because your characters have been surrounded by death, it doesn't mean they're not affected by it.

No matter how heightened your world is, mortality should still be mortality.

Try to let it manifest in a fucked up way.

So yesterday, right?

I buy this pack of natural chewing gum.

The packaging has these big letters on it that say "Bright Green".

And I had...

Until right now you guys have never had anything bad happen to you before, have you?

Well have you?

Maybe.

Look baby, I told you I was sorry, shit.

It's a fucked up...

No, I'm not talking about you, ugh.

It's not about you all the time, oh my god.

I fucked up.

Well now you have to tell us.

Now I have to tell you?

What do you think this is, the fucking Breakfast club?

Yeah I love that fucking movie.

It is a good movie.

So are you gonna tell us?

What happened to you?

Ugh.

I was raped.

I was uh, I was raped in uh, in college.

You know what, no, no, excuse me.

You know the really, the really weird part of it all

is that,

no one tells you that

that when a man forces himself inside of you,

you don't always stay dry.

Like some animalistic part tries to, to make it work.

His body wanted it and,

mine welcomed it.

We're just animals, I guess.

Simple soulless animals.

No one tells you that.

You see?

That's exactly how uncomfortable this second act turning point needs to feel it should feel awkward, weird.

I mean it's the lowest point in the script, right?

So that stuff didn't really happen to you?

No, but it's a good story, right?

Isn't it obvious what needs to happen at the end?

No, that's what we're sitting here trying to fucking figure out.

What?

What's your idea on the ending?

I don't know guys, you gave me your pitch to distract me, I'm not gonna tell you anything unless I'm really in.

At this point, like what does it even fucking matter?

Yes, you're in.

I mean, okay?

Yeah?

Yeah.

Okay.

But no tricks, no lies, just business.

Just business.

Well it's the witching hour, Angelenos and there's only one minute left of Halloween.

If you're not drunk by now or you haven't been scared yet you probably should check your pulse because you might be dead already.

And you're sure nobody goes in here?

Not a soul, I live next door.

It's vacant land.

Are we really gonna let this girl direct our movie?

I mean how well do you know her?

A few months.

She was living in New York, I convinced her to move out here.

She's brilliant, trust me.

She's insane.

Fucking insane.

What great artist isn't?

Look at this shirt.

Huntley's so cool.

Yeah he was so cool.

There's no was when it comes to us actors, my friend.

Just turn on the TV, you'll see him again.

Actors can never be killed.

They're like frozen in pop culture carbonite.

I mean he's Huntley fucking Thomas.

Been around forever.

You never really die.

What if you die before you're successful, what then?

The egg cracks on the outside, life ends.

It cracks from the inside, life begins.

Sometimes you gotta crack.

Did you come up with that?

I heard it in yoga once.

I like your shirt, man.

It's fucking cool.

I think the second round of shrooms just kicked in.

Eh, take it.

Take it man, it's shit.

I see how you're looking at it.

You know what?

We'll let the coyotes do the rest.

Oh god, this is really fucking disturbing.

Let's get the fuck out of here.

Wait, but.

At least he made it into the 27 Club.

How?

Front door open.

Hey, did you finish reading the script?

What did you think?

Yeah, it's actually pretty good but how do you want it to end?

He awake yet?

God damn.

You knocked him out pretty good.

God, his pulse is racing.

You weren't wearing that shirt before.

He stole it from a corpse.

What?

You fucking kidding me?

It's fucking evidence, take it off.

You fucking carrot.

Fuck.

I'm gonna wear, I'm wearing one of your shirts, okay?

Hey look at that, that fucking shirt, that's one of my favorite fucking shirts.

Where are my keys?

I'll get the car.

No, you can't get the, it's Halloween, there's people everywhere.

So what are we gonna do then?

We finish the scene.

The scene is finished, it's fine, finished.

No, okay, so they bury the body, we think it's fine, and then what?

It's gotta keep moving.

And they shit themselves to death, the end.

Well I know what I'm doing.

What are you, wait?

I know you didn't.

What about this?

What the, walk off with my...

What about the scripts?

What about it?

Well we've only got two scenes to go.

Yeah, and?

Can't we just breathe for a second, shit.

Would the hero really run the risk of burying him in the middle of the night?

I mean why not just chop him up into little pieces?

He still wouldn't become a zombie.

You're overthinking it.

That's what he does.

No I don't.

Yes you do.

You know the one thing that unifies everyone alive today?

What?

We'll all be dead eventually.

Together.

And every story that's unfolding right now, one day there won't be a single person alive to tell them.

So it's our job to show future generations how we live now.

Which is probably how we always lived and how we always will.

That was deep shit.

We'll have it done by tomorrow.

We could be writing it for another 10 years.

I mean how do we even know when it's done?

You'll hear ringing in your ear.

Whenever you finish something big, you hear this ringing in your ear.

It's called the White Noise.

The White Noise?

Yeah.

Most people never hear it in their lifetime.

And you just hear this everyday, I'm guessing.

Well you'd guess that, huh?

But no, never.

Never heard it.

Just heard about it.

Maybe one day.

Anyway, it's been a strange night, guys.

Inspiration only comes when the body's relaxed.

So let's relax.

Let's relax, right.

How are we supposed to do that?

Sex helps me.

So does dancing.

Ever heard of dance cardio?

That's where we met.

♪ Inside your head ♪

♪ Late at night watching these films that feel bare ♪

♪ Lost your mind and when you sit back stare and ♪

♪ Stopped rewinded for you that ♪

♪ Is it all inside ♪

♪ My mind, oh no ♪

♪ Could it just be ♪

♪ Half of them to be ♪

♪ 'cause I wanna look as you lose your mind ♪

♪ Someone within the line ♪

♪ Just you there who tears me a time ♪

♪ I'm sure you'll be fine ♪

♪ Did you leave it back with yesterday ♪

♪ Or maybe you lost it all this way ♪

♪ Don't be so silly boy ♪

♪ It's right here ♪

♪ You're the state ♪ Ah, um, I should, I should get back to writing.

No, no, stay here.

Come on, let me teach you to dance.

Look, I'm not, no, I'm not a good dancer.

Wrong, I'm sure you're a good dancer.

No, I'm bad.

Really bad.

I'm not coordinated at all.

Jazz, what the fuck, come on, what are you doing?

Okay, I'm no.

Come on, you guys need help.

I'm not getting in the way of this shit.

No.

The man wants to go, let him go.

No, he wants to stay with me.

It's not your business.

♪ You looked all right ♪

♪ Now when I look at you and I say how ♪

♪ Do you do ♪

♪ That's what she says ♪

♪ Are you gonna be my man ♪ You took these fucking pictures, didn't you?

You really think I'd stand there and watch you fuck someone else?

Then who the fuck took them then?

I don't know, anyone.

Can you please stop it now!

Fuck you!

They're inside!

What?

Whoever took these pictures were inside the house.

The stalker.

What if they're watching right now?

That means they seen all this.

Everything!

Fuck!

What the fuck?

It's my autopilot surveillance drone.

It's attracted to movement and heat.

I'ma set it to scan and recharge every 30 minutes.

What does that mean?

I mean it automatically recharges and watches over the house.

Streams straight to my phone.

Okay, no, no, no, come on.

This is fucking insane.

We have to call the cops.

It's not a fucking option, Evan.

Someone broke into your house.

We killed someone tonight, I killed someone tonight.

Accidentally.

Yeah so we call the cops and explain that to them.

We're not these people.

We could explain to them that it was self-defense.

That's what we explain to them, it was self-defense.

So you're just gonna call and tell them that you hit somebody in the back of the head with a fucking hammer?

It looks premeditated!

Shh.

And then what are we supposed to tell them about the cop in the closet?

We're not gonna be able to tell them anything if this fucking psycho got photos from tonight, are we?

Jesus, we killed Huntley Thomas.

Hey listen, Huntley isn't a zombie, okay?

He's still gonna be dead tomorrow.

He's gonna be dead next week and the week after.

We're creating something now, okay?

Something amazing and meaningful which is so much more important than one actor's life, by the way.

And you're about to finish.

You're about to finish tonight.

So turn yourselves in tomorrow if you have to, just don't do it tonight.

Why are you helping us?

Huh, why are you here?

You could have had us arrested, you could have left.

And ruin an opportunity?

Wouldn't have much of a movie to direct without the movie star.

Or the writer.

Look, this is how Huntley Thomas would have wanted it.

This creation, our movie.

They're gonna talk about this for a hundred years.

This is pop culture like a motherfucker!

Come on, even Officer Duane.

He's gonna be in on it too.

We're all gonna be fucking legends.

I'ma go check the gate code, switch all that shit up, lock everything up.

You guys go check out the secret garden.

He comes back, we gonna be ready for that motherfucker.

Shit.

Drug him and dump him somewhere downtown.

So where's the perfect place to hide a body?

Why are you friends with him?

Why am I friends with him?

Why did you date him?

I don't know, I guess he makes things adventurous.

He does.

I met him on my first day in New York.

No way.

Yup.

I met him on my first day in L.A.

Wait, really?

Yeah, I was an extra on this movie that he was shooting.

He rescued me from this insane producer who was yelling at me for eating before the casting crew, and um,

it was fucking amazing.

Just this movie star sticking up for a nobody.

You're too smart to be a nobody.

You don't need him.

You know that, right?

Do you?

You need to leave.

Don't tell Raffy, but I'm calling the cops.

We're not murderers.

Just, I'm calling them this time.

I can't do this.


I'm here for you, Raffy.

Raffy.

Raffy Rivers.

Leave me alone.

Leave me the fuck alone.

I don't wanna be famous no more.

Leave me alone.

The fuck you looking at, let's go.

Oh shit, where the fuck is this party?


Did you see something?

No, you?

No.

You okay?

Raffy?

I'm supposed to be turning 28 next year.

I used to count these every day.

I thought I'd be better by now.

Have more control.

You know, making shit that I actually wanna do.

I actually cared about.

I ain't been offered anything.

Not one fucking offer since Underwater Sinners tanked.

You're Raffy Rivers.

You're a movie star.

One bad film isn't gonna kill your career.

I guess Raffy Rivers is all washed up.

That was a good pun.

Raffy Rivers, all washed up.

I know.

Look, man, you're the real artist.

You're the talented one.

Me, no.

No I'm not, you are.

This movie, our movie, we need to finish it.

This shit could be amazing.

I believe that.

Shit, you gotta believe.

You gotta believe it could be amazing.

My acting agent dropped me.

When?

This morning.

I didn't tell you, so.

I have no idea what I'm doing.

You're writing, I'm directing and he's starring.

That's what we're doing.

Fuck 'em!

Fuck 'em!

Fuck 'em!

Come on!

Fuck these motherfuckers!

Fuck 'em.

Fuck 'em.

Fuck 'em.

Fuck 'em.

Fuck 'em.

Fuck 'em!

Woo!

Fuck 'em!

Fuck Harvey!

Fuck you, motherfucker!

Every movie I did, we could do that shit!


Your burning ambition?

Ah, so you remember.

Come on.

Ah.

I truly believe in you.

No, stop it.

You get an opportunity.

Please, what are you talking about.

Isn't everyone preying on everyone's ambition?

Ready?

Yeah, yeah.

He's dead.

He's dead because of you.

Dead?

What does that mean anymore?

I mean...

Stop, stop, stop.

Can you try it all again, but without any dialogue?

Why?

Why not?

No, why don't we just switch the words around?

We'll just change the line when he, No, no, no. It's the weird part where he goes into the...

No words.

No words, okay.

You're having fun with this, huh?

Just connect with each other.

Do it.

Okay, action.


Oops.

Guess that one had nuts in it.

What's happening, what's wrong with him?

You okay?

Damn, E.

You look terrified.

You should probably take a selfie, where's your phone?

Oh that's right.

I told you to take his phone.

I didn't tell you to kill him.

He's fine.

He's just allergic to nuts.

You understand why we couldn't call the cops, right?

It would ruin everything that we've worked for.

You don't wanna do that.

You should see this as an opportunity.

I mean, you're right there on death's doorstep but you have a magical adrenaline shot that fixes everything instantly.

It's like an antidote to your kryptonite.

Okay, well what do we do now?

You just relax!

No, we have to help him, he's fucking dying right now.

He's not dying!

Yes he is, look!

He has six minutes of life.

Well, five minutes and 30 seconds.

Relax.

I'm giving him inspiration.

How many people can say that they walked through the gates of hell and survived.

How does it feel to taste your own mortality?

Man, it's a special moment.

It's a gift.

You're crazy.

When you're on your real deathbed, you'll look back at this moment, and it won't be so scary.

All right.

Where's the adrenaline shot?

Where is it?

You have an adrenaline? It should be his clothes.

Where is it?

Jacket, jacket.

Jacket, jacket!

Okay, where's it, where's your, where's his jacket?

I don't fucking know!

Hey Evan, where's your jacket?

Huh?

Huntley, shit!

Ah!

Come on, come on.


Kssh!

Get off!

Fuck!


I got it!

Take his pants off!

It goes in his leg!

The coyotes are falling for the bait, so we're good!

Evan?

Sora, off.

Sora, off!

Yo!

You win.

You got me.

You scared the shit out of me, man.

Thought I almost killed you.

Hello?

Front door open.

Madness drives ambition.

How many times was it?

Whoever took these pictures were inside the house!

Who took this picture?

The fuck?

How did you even fucking...

I always keep an extra one of these in my car.

But thank you for bringing this back.

These things are fucking expensive.

The fuck out of here.

What's this?

It's your turn.

Russian Roulette, classic and old school.

You know how I know this shit isn't loaded, 'cause you're too pussy for that.

Too much of a fucking pussy.

Then why do you have it aimed at my head?

Just put it to your head and pull the trigger once.

Got a one in six chance.

Who came up with this little shitty cliche, hmm?

You or him?

Are you scared?

This moment's a gift, bro.

Can you taste your own mortality?

I don't feel shit.

Oh yeah?

How about now?

I think you wanted me to kill Huntley on purpose.

One less actor to compete with.

You, you, think this script

is gonna change something, huh?

It's gonna fucking change your life, huh?

You're gonna be some big fucking movie star after this bullshit?

Come on, Evan!

My fucking agent would never let me co star in a movie with you.

If they were gonna hire you, who would they call, huh?

You are a unemployed actor in Los Angeles with no fucking money and no agent.

You pull that trigger on me and I will fucking kill you.

You know how I know this shit is not loaded?

Because you fucking need me.

Both of you.

You ain't shit without me.

I loved you.

I loved you and you fucked with me.

Told you.

I'm a entity to you.

Got me tied up in this fucking chair and I still hold all the cards.

Raffy Rivers.

Who are you?

A nobody.

Fucking pathetic.

Fuck are you doing?!


Ah, fuck!

You've had the knife behind you the whole time?

Fuck, ah!

It was all pretend!

It was.

No, no!

All of this, I set it up, it was all pretend.

What?

I had the agents call you and let you go.

Why?

I thought it was the firecracker that you needed to finish this script.

So I have an agent?

Yes, yes, you got a fucking agent.

And Huntley, he's still alive?

Nah, he's still dead.

And...

Scene.

You guys.

It's crazy.

You can pretty much do anything you want in this town if you have a good enough costume.

Someone smells good today.

It's fucking him.

Who?

The stalker.

No.

No, no, no, no.

The whole world is your stalker.

I just take the photos, man.

It was uh, it was a lot of fun watching you fuck that shorty while you were wherever you were.

She has much bigger titties than you.

All right man, that's fucking enough!

Did you know that they gave me 45 grand for that shot?

45 thousand dollars!

It's my masterpiece.

That's why you've been fucking with me, huh?

45, that's why you've been fucking with me?

The crazier you get, the richer I get.

Sorry bro, it's just business.

And I knew the shit was gonna hit the fan when you came home and found out he was cocksawing through everything.

So I came back to get that killer shot.

I didn't expect to find three killers.

Front door open.

Front door open.

What the?

Fuck calling the cops, man, help me.

You know, he'd probably still be alive if he hadn't seen me hiding there.

Winning.

I like your shirt.

What?

Your shirt, where'd you get it?

This isn't mine.

It's that drone recording everything?

And it streams to my phone.

How are you feeling?

Lugging Huntley's body into the block next door.

What?

What are you saying?

You must be exhausted.

No.

No, no, no, no.

Nice try, you stupid bitch.

I didn't kill anybody.

Well it sucks that your fingerprints are on the gun though.

You should apologize for shooting Raffy Rivers in the foot.

No!

No, fuck you.

Especially while impersonating a police officer.

Stop it.

Stop moving, stop moving!

E!

Fuck you all!

Fuck you!

I can hear it.

The White Noise, I can hear it.

The hero needs to die.

That's the end.

You actually loaded it.

It was loaded the whole time.

I thought it was the firecracker you needed.

I can hear it.

I can hear.

We're gonna need another writer.

♪ I had one look last summer ♪

♪ That won everyday ♪

♪ The day the beach was so crowded ♪

♪ When she passed my way ♪

♪ She thought that I looked so lonely ♪ I'm pretty sure it was Nostradamus who said the most massive stars in the universe have the shortest lives.

Just look at the 27 Club.

A bunch of famous people with shitloads of money leads to boredom, leads to temptation, leads to shitty decisions, leads to total self-destruction.

When you're not a slave to need or to God, what the fuck else is there to do?

Become a slave to something else.

If you know what owns you and you ignore it, then life's pretty crappy.

And if you know what owns you and you let it, life's fucking awesome.

Especially in Hollywood.

♪ On that summer day ♪

♪ Lucky day ♪

♪ That set my life awhirl ♪

♪ Now that summer's here again ♪

♪ Will you still be my girl ♪

♪ Summer day ♪

♪ Lucky day ♪

♪ Summer's here again ♪


♪ We couldn't find the pieces to this puzzle ♪

♪ I've got good eyes from all these things ♪

♪ That don't fit together ♪

♪ One another and more ♪

♪ Days go by ♪

♪ And yet I'm still trying ♪

♪ I feel like an animal ♪

♪ Ready to fly ♪

♪ But I'm stuck inside of these questions in my mind ♪

♪ Just look around you so you remember ♪

♪ All that I gave you ♪

♪ But you still want more ♪

♪ Just let me hold you ♪

♪ Fill this void in your heart ♪

♪ Well take a deep breath ♪

♪ It won't be long this ♪

♪ There's nothing great here ♪

♪ Or come with thunder ♪

♪ True love awaits ♪

♪ Don't throw it around your head ♪


♪ Let's go take the pieces of our puzzles ♪

♪ Throw them off the cliff ♪

♪ And follow after ♪

♪ 'cause everything will come together ♪

♪ And every step I take ♪

♪ Is another day ♪

♪ Just look around you ♪

♪ So you remember ♪

♪ All that I gave you ♪

♪ But you still want more ♪

♪ Just let me hold you ♪

♪ Through this war in your heart ♪

♪ We'll take a deep breath ♪

♪ It won't be long this ♪

♪ There's nothing great here ♪

♪ I'll come without you ♪

♪ True love awaits ♪

♪ Don't throw it around in your head ♪