Better Call Saul S2E3 Script

Amarillo (2016)




Sorry about the hiccup, folks.

Won't be long.

You got five minutes.

JIMMY: Howdy, folks!

Can someone tell me if Mrs. Alma May Urbano is on board?

Alma May Urbano?

There you are!

Hello, dear.

Very good to meet you.

My name's Jimmy.

I tried to visit you at Sandpiper, but they wouldn't allow me to.

Hey, you know what? It doesn't matter.

I saw your bus broken down. Here you are! Lucky me!

Do you prefer to be called Mrs. Urbano or Alma May or just plain Alma?

My last name is McGill, but you can call me Jimmy.

Hey, everyone. My name's Jimmy McGill, I'm an attorney at law. But...

Don't mind me.

Just talk amongst yourselves.

Now, Alma May, do you recall responding to a mailer from my law firm, Davis & Main of Santa Fe, New Mexico?

I... I don't know.

We were looking to help any Sandpiper residents who may have been overcharged for basic goods and services.

Now, does that ring a bell?

Oh! Maybe. Was it yellow?

It's canary yellow. I picked that color myself!


Well, ma'am, I'm here to make sure you get your money back.

What're you talking about? Who took Alma May's money?

Uh, well, that's a very good question.

And thank you for asking, Mister...

Amos. Amos Lydecker.

Mr. Lydecker, Jimmy McGill.

Now, nobody took anybody's money, exactly.

Okay? It's not like the Sandpiper people, you know, put on a ski mask and mugged Alma May here at gunpoint.

So, I want you to put that mental image right out of your head.

See, what we're talking about here is more of a... It's just a discrepancy.

It's just a little thing. It's fairly innocent.

But, we need to fix it.

You follow me?

Well, put it this way.

Alma May, let's say you're out on a date with your boyfriend.

You do have a boyfriend, right? (LAUGHTER)

Ah! You don't? Come on!

Alma May's holding out on me.


Do you have a nephew?

Nephew? Oh, yes. Steve.

Okay, Steve, is he a good guy?

(CHUCKLES) Yes, very good.

Okay. So let's say you and Steve go out to dinner at, well, Birdie's.

That's where you're all headed today, right?

(ALL AGREEING) All right.

So, both of you have a great meal.

Chicken fried steak and green beans, and it's all perfect.

Here comes the check...

"Hey, wait a dog-gone, 24 bucks for a side of buttermilk biscuits?"

That doesn't sound right now, does it? ALL: No.

No, it does not. It sounds like something got added up wrong.

Well naturally, you send your nephew, Steve, to talk to the manager.

And naturally, the manager corrects the mistake.

And what's more, he gives you a coupon for a free meal next time you come in. How about that!


Well, that same kind of thing is what happened at Sandpiper Crossing.


And nothing makes me sadder than to see people of the Greatest Generation, people like my own Nana and Bobo, getting overcharged by some great big company.

Even if it was an accident.


Now, I know that the good people at Sandpiper want to make this right.

Sooner or later.

But you know what? Well, sometimes, it's just easier if you get your nephew, Steve, to go take care of it for you.

And that's how I want you to think of me.

Georgiana. Hey there, Georgie Girl. Thank you.

Oh! It's all there, everything I need.

Thank you so much. Enjoy your lunch.

Alma May. You did it. Thank you so much. Thank you.

Thank you, Henry.

All right. Hey, Sue...


Beautiful penmanship! A lost art...

Schweikart and Cokely are pursuing an aggressive strategy, but looking at the relevant case law, I don't think it's going to play with this magistrate judge.

I've read over a dozen of her rulings, all of which have sided with the plaintiff on cases like this.

I've included a memo to that effect in today's materials, which you can peruse at your leisure.

Thanks, Erin. How about we move on to client outreach?


You still with us?


I'm going to save you from having to brag.

Over 200 new Sandpiper clients signed over the past three weeks.

Well done, Jimmy. Thank you.

Thanks, Cliff.

Uh, right now, we're in the process of mapping out the entire Southwest, targeting the largest Sandpiper facilities first.

Phoenix, Colorado Springs, Fort Worth, Provo.

That's just for starters.

Ideally, my goal, another 200 by the end of the month.

With this many folks, we have an excellent shot at a solid batch of plaintiffs for the classes in each district.

Excellent. Look forward to the next report.

On to a stickier wicket, coordinating actions.

Um, sorry. Before we move on.

I'd like to go back to client outreach, just for a moment.

(SIGHS) Looking over these numbers, here.

Really astonishing results, Jimmy. Incredible.

Your last trip to Amarillo, you came back with 22 new clients?

Twenty-four. Twenty-four.

(CHUCKLES) I'm confused.

Um, how many people out there actually responded to our direct mailer?


Hmm. Oh, right, yeah.

A Mars Alma May Urbano.

But you got 24 new clients from this one response?

That is... (CHUCKLES)


Well, you're welcome. I mean, what, is there a problem?

Well, might not some parties, the opposing counsel for example, see this differential and conclude that there may have been some solicitation involved?

I did not solicit.

I'm just wondering how you account for your success.

Because it will definitely raise eyebrows over at Schweikart and Cokely.

I'm sorry, but it will.

Particularly in a case involving seniors for whom the ethical guidelines on solicitation were virtually created by the ABA.

Chuck, I'm sure that...

Jimmy, if you could clear this up that would be helpful.

I went to Amarillo to confer with the client and to make sure that we had a solid good-faith basis for our case there. Overall.

As many of you are aware, I've visited more than my share of retirement homes.

These are close-knit communities. Let me tell you, word gets around real fast.

Dorothy in Phase 2 gets a new Rascal Scooter, well, it's big news.

So these other 23 residents, they approached you?

Cliff, they heard the scuttlebutt before I crossed state lines.

And I certainly didn't have to go knockin' on any doors.

And is it any surprise that they wanna speak with the guy who was there to show them they may have money coming their way?

I gotta tell ya, with all that in mind, I should've done better.


Makes sense. Howard?


We good to move on?

CLIFF: And, Chuck, not incidentally, it is absolutely vital that we dot our I's and cross our T's here.

Invaluable. So, thank you.

The price of excellence is eternal vigilance.

Indeed. (CHUCKLES)

HOWARD: Coordination. I believe that's where we left off.

That's right. Brian, this is your thing, so why don't you take this?


Considering the dimensions of these cases, taken together and individually, it makes sense to designate someone to handle the scheduling.

What I'm proposing is that we create a small team at D&M dedicated specifically to coordinating all elements of the individual actions.

We'll loop in HHM when anything...

Brian. I'm sorry. Excuse me for interrupting.

I just want to say that I take Chuck's point.

I do.

I mean, this is like a "wife of Caesar" type thing.

There can't even be a hint of solicitation, so I'm gonna pull back.

No more meet-and-greets at Sandpiper facilities.

I'll find another way to proceed.

CLIFF: Well, Jimmy, we'll leave that up to you.

You know, client outreach is your department.

BRIAN: Uh, where was I? Okay, right.

If we have a more consolidated nerve center here in New Mexico, where the...


Hey, Kim, where can I get a copy of that Neiderman deposition?

I've got an extra Neiderman, Jimmy. You can have one of mine.

Oh, wow, thanks, Erin.

No worries.

Shoot. Where did I put that?

Thanks that's...

Man, can you believe Chuck in there?

I mean, Jesus. Solicitation?

Let me tell you, when we were building this case, I was chasing down eighty-year-old mall walkers.

That was solicitation! But did he say "boo"?

Bullshit, he did!

What happened in Texas?

Nothing. I did my job.

You didn't do a song and dance in the day room for the old-timers?

No! No.

Not in the day room.

Jimmy, you know solicitation can get you disbarred. This matters.

Well, here's what I think matters, twenty-four senior citizens now have representation.

Before I went they didn't even know they were getting ripped off.

Now they have us in their corner. How is that not a win?

You said in there you'd find another way.

Did you mean it?

Sure. Absolutely. (SCOFFS)

Look, I...

I need you to understand something very critical here.


I put myself on the line to get you this job.

(SIGHS) Okay.

I thought it was because I'm sensational with old people.

Yeah, and who do you think told them that?

So what you threw me a bone?

No. Asshole.

You know I believe in you.

But then I made my beliefs known to them.

Now everything you do reflects back on me. With Howard.

Because ultimately, I talked him into going out on a limb for you, too.

Do you understand? It's, it's my word. It's my judgment.


You and I both know you can do this job.

But please, you just have to do it right.



You wanna make sure you put in the batteries the right way.

Or it won't work.

Then you close him up.


I think...

I think you're good to go, young lady.

Why don't you give his foot a squeeze?



KAYLEE: He's funny!

Oh, darling...

KAYLEE: I think I'll name you...

Mr. Snuggles.

Are you hungry?

KAYLEE: I'm gonna get you some mashed potatoes.

That should get you through to next month.

Mike, thank you. (VEHICLE PASSES)

But you shouldn't feel that you need to...

Too late.


Something up?

Feels like something's up.

No. It's... I didn't get much sleep.

My head's...

I'm sorry.

You tell me it's none of my business, I'll drop it.

I don't want you to worry.

Not the worrying kind.


Last two nights, I heard gunshots.

First night, they were maybe a block or two over. Woke me up.

My first thought was firecrackers, I mean, that's what I assumed at the time.

But then last night...

There's no mistaking it. There was three of them. They were quick.

Pop, pop, pop Closer.

(WHISPERING) It was like they were right outside the house.

You call the cops?


Took 'em over an hour to get here, then they looked around for a whole two minutes.

But by then, of course, there was nothing to see.


I'm staying here tonight.

No, Mike. No, that's not necessary.

It is not a problem. I'll take the couch.

Mike, you asked, so I answered.

Please, don't make me sorry I told you.


Kaylee, come, hmm?

Get your supper.



What about Colorado Springs?


Two hundred and eighty-three residents, and...

We sent out 283 mailers.

Yeah, and how many response cards came back?




Son of a bitch.

Dana, Toni. Have a good one.

You too, Mr. Main.

Cliff, uh, can I have a second?

What's up?

Uh, it's those Sandpiper mailers.

We should be getting responses of like 12 to 15%.

But we're getting ones and twos.

In Colorado Springs, zero.

Wow! How can that be?

(SIGHS) I'm thinking it's the staff.

They're tossing the mailers before they can reach the residents.

Maybe they got told to do it by the Sandpiper front office.

Which would be actionable as hell.

If we could prove it.

Big "if."

And to do so would take more manpower than I can spare.

For now, let's just stick with getting those client numbers up.

Guess you'd better think of another way.

I think I got it.

TV commercial. Highly targeted.

Let me tell you, at Sandpiper, the trains run on time.

Mussolini would be proud.

Every one I've visited so far, same exact schedule.

10:00 a.m., water aerobics, 2:00 p.m., line dancing. So on, and so forth.

They always leave 3:00 p.m. to 4:00 p.m. free.

Why? Murder, She Wrote.

(CHUCKLES) It's been in syndication since, like, the 1850s.

And let me tell you, when that thing comes on?

It draws the blue-hairs like moths to a bug zapper. (LAUGHS)

3:14 p.m., end of the first act cliff-hanger.

First commercial up, Davis & Main. Guaranteed eyeballs.

Lots of 'em.

There's nothing Sandpiper can do about that.

We ran a commercial a few years back, another class action case.

Kind of a new thing for us. It's not exactly my go-to, but generally speaking, I'm open to it.

We will talk next week.

Great! Safe travels.





Mesothelioma is a rare lung disease

usually associated with exposure to asbestos, a known human carcinogen.

Long-term inhalation of asbestos fibers

can cause serious or fatal illnesses

including malignant lung cancer, mesothelioma and asbestosis.

I remember they worked real hard to get that just right.

To get what just right?

OMAR: Oh, the swirl.

They wanted it kind of nebulous, but not too nebulous.

Then there was the issue of the speed.

I remember there were a lot of meetings about that.

I'll bet.

For your free consultation, call Davis & Main at 505-242-7700.

That's 505-242-7700.


Cliff signed off on this?

The partners were very happy.

What do you think?

I think...

Whatever happened to showmanship?

Yo. Check it out.




Would you two ass-clowns act like the professionals your parents are paying for you to become?

This happens to be very valuable.

Yeah? What is it?

This one is the Alpine Shepherd Boy.

It's for her nephew. So, come on.

Join me. Production meeting. Bring it in. All right.

Now look, teamwork makes the dream work.

Together, we can make something, dare I say it, bravura.

And this is a golden opportunity, especially for you guys, 'cause it's gonna play all around the Southwest.

So, who knows what it could lead to?

Better lead to 100 bucks each.

What is it with you and money?

Saving up for a VX2000.

Hey! Pop quiz. What do we three have in common with the greats?

Welles, Fellini, Bergman. The biggies.


All three of them, to a man, worked in the highly lucrative, creatively rewarding field, of advertising.

And tonight, we join them.

This is heady stuff, right?

Okay. So, pay attention.

We open on granny, and she is rocking.

So she's back and forth...

Just very back and forth.

And then, very slowly and smoothly, the camera, uh...

Moves towards... Dolly?

A dolly. Good, yeah.

You see a dolly here?

You guys didn't bring a dolly?

Nope. No dolly.

You didn't ask for a dolly.

Gotta ask, dude. Dolly's extra.

It's true.

Okay. No dolly. Um. (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

We will improvise then.

Stay with me.

She's rocking, she's shivering, she's clutching at a tattered shawl.


They turned the heat off on her, these evil bastards.


She's cold and hungry, she's friendless.

This is heart-rending stuff, man.


Okay. It's a one-er. And it's shot in glorious black and white.

We can do that, right?


So, that's it? Old lady in a chair? That's your commercial?


Does anybody like you?


I'm ready for my close-up, Mr. McGill!






It wasn't exactly set because Perez wasn't back up in time.

Low ball. Strike one out right now. Dale Carey at the plate.

Perez at first base.

3-2. Bottom of the ninth inning.

And the pitch. Perez is going...

And it's over left, third baseman Nick Johnson.

Perez goes into third, he slides, safe!

Perez gets all the way around the bases.

Perez to third base. Dale Carey still at first.

Looking to get to second. But he'll stay at first. A great play.















MIKE: Morning.






Hey, honey, what's happening?

What's wrong?

What happened?



Where's Kaylee? She's at school.

She's fine, she doesn't know about it.

Are you all right?

Let me show you.

It's up, it's up there.

You see it? It's right up there.

You see that? You see the shape of it?


You do see it, right?

I see it.

What time did you hear the shots?

2:13 this morning. I looked at the clock.

It was three of them, It was exactly like last time.

And you didn't call the police? Or did you?

No. I... What's the point?


I'm thinking outside the box, but...

Do you think maybe it's possible that you dreamed it?

It happens sometimes.

I didn't dream it, Mike, because I didn't sleep a wink last night.

That came from a bullet.

I mean, it must have, it wasn't there before last night, I promise you that.

And I, I don't know what to...




I mean, I was here. I was here and you weren't.

I believe you.


I believe you.

All right. (SIGHS)

That's it. We're getting you and Kaylee out of this house.

End of story.



You ever wonder about these things?

JIMMY: What things?

This. Like, what's the story with these?

Who was it who first said, "Hey, I know, a big bowl of balls!"

I don't know. They came with the place.

No shit.

They're in every corporate apartment in the world.

They're like the Gideon Bible.

Hey. Don't be jealous of my big bowl of balls. It's unbecoming.

Why do they all have to have empty vases?

Well, it's the law. Plus, it's a metaphor.

I gotta say, I will miss the nail salon's vibrating chairs.

For you, I can make any chair in this place vibrate.

(SCOFFS) You ready for this?


Okay, here it goes.

You're 86 years old, you're a resident of Sandpiper, Colorado Springs.

You just finished your afternoon snack, lime Jell-O.

Lime. Got it.

You're in the day room, you're watching your favorite TV program.

And what's this? There's been another murder in Cabot Cove?

No! Yes!

The sheriff is in over his head.

And once again, Jessica Fletcher has to put aside the novel she's been writing, and assist law enforcement.

Shocker! The killer left behind a cryptogram.

And commercial.



WOMAN: (ON TV) My husband and I scrimped and saved for so many years.

We did our best to build a nest egg, so that we wouldn't be a burden to our family.

After Ronald passed, I moved to an assisted living facility.

A nice place.

They told me they'd take care of everything. But...

Then one day, they said all my money was gone.

How could that be? Where did it all go?

That's not a real tear is it?

It's Visine.

JIMMY: (ON TV) If you or a loved one is a resident

of a Sandpiper Crossing facility

or other associated retirement community, you may be eligible

to receive compensation. For a free consultation, call the law offices of Davis & Main at 505-242-7700.

That's 505-242-7700.

(SIGHS) Well?

You made that?

With some film students?

I directed.

It looks professional. (CHUCKLES)


And if I were an 86-year-old Sandpiper resident, I'd be dialing.

Yes! Up top. (REMOTE THUDS)

And all made in accordance with the rules and regulations of the American Bar Association.


I can 't believe Davis & Main went for it.

Well, I'm in charge of the department.

Yeah, but still you know...

Cliff Main was fine with this. (CHUCKLES)

Why wouldn't he be?

No, it's... No, It's fantastic!

Let's celebrate. I'm getting more wine. You want some?









Colorado Springs, Colorado.

Yeah, I'd like the number for KKTV Channel 11.

Omar! What's the cut-off for FedEx?

I need to get a package out tout de suite.


Uh, yes, can you connect me to your ad sales department?


CALDERA: Gums look good. No recession.

Tongue looks good, too.

Eyes are clear.

This little lady's in fine fettle.

I could have one of the girls trim her nails, if you like.

No. Some other time.

What do you got for me?

Bodyguard job. 200 bucks.

What else?

For you, that's the best fit I've got.

I know a loan shark, always needs enforcement and recovery.

Pays good and it's steady work.

Most of the time, we're just talking intimidation.

Strictly verbal.

"Most of the time."

I'm not breaking legs. What else?

Look, we discussed this.

You want next-level pay, you gotta do next-level work.

I respect where you're coming from on this thing, I do. But that's just how it goes.

All right. (CLEARS THROAT)

She's gonna need a DHPP shot.

In six months. We'll send you a reminder card.

Until then.

Give me the bodyguard job.

For 200?

I'll call you with the where and the when.




So everybody knows to...

They know.

Every line starting with 7700 has been re-routed to the bullpen.

Plus your office.

All the assistants know to keep them open.

So if you're on a call and another call comes in, the call doesn't go to an answering machine, right?

Because, very important, old people don't like talking to robots.

If I'm on a call and another call comes in, they'll roll over to Maida.

After that, Iris will get the next one, and then Julian, and then Barbara and Yvon.

Yeah. Right on down the line.


Let's make that the plan, then.


What time do you have?

Uh, quarter after. It should be running now, right?

Is there anything else?

No, thanks.

It's... I'll just be in my office.

Come on.



Come on.

Come on, Colorado Springs...

Come on.



OMAR: Good afternoon, Davis & Main. Attorneys at law.

How may we help you?

Yes, ma'am. Yes, ma'am, that is unfortunate.

(TELEPHONE RINGS) Now, to get your case started, may I ask for a name and a number for one of our attorneys to reach you?

WOMAN: Good afternoon, Davis & Main, attorneys at law.

How may we help you? (TELEPHONE RINGS)

MAN: Good afternoon, Davis & Main, attorneys at law.

Yes, sir. That is correct. (WOMAN SPEAKING SPANISH)

WOMAN 2: Good afternoon, Davis & Main.

One of our attorneys...

WOMAN 3: Good afternoon, Davis & Main... of our attorneys get back to you.

MAN 2: Give me one second, I'm just going to take down... MAN 3: Yes. That is correct...

And you're currently a resident at the Colorado Springs facility?

MAN 4: Good afternoon, Davis & Main...

Yes, ma'am.

We'll be happy to send an information packet right out to you.

May I ask, are you currently a resident of the Sandpiper Crossing facility?



OMAR: I'll just need a name and a phone number.





CALDERA: Something came in this evening and it's definitely next level pay.


CALDERA: It's probably a long shot given your selectivity.

MIKE: What's the job?

I asked, the guy wouldn't tell me.

But whatever it is, it's serious money.

And the guy, he specifically asked for you.

And who's the guy?

I can't hold it, sir.

No control on the planes, Captain. We're going down and fast.

"We're going down and fast."

Check this out, this is a good part.

So do they all die?

Tell me that much. Shh, shh, shh, shh!

Does Rock Hudson run 'em into an iceberg?

Is this before or after he did McMillan & Wife?

Shut up. Watch the movie.


What is this weird fascination you have with stories of men trapped on the North Pole?

Ice Station Zebra is on the North Pole.

The Thing takes place on the South Pole.

They literally could not be any more different.

My Dad loves this one.

Yeah, him and Howard Hughes.

(CHUCKLES) I know, right?

Can't get two finer reviews than that.

MAN: (ON TV) How much pressure left in the air banks?

Down to 800 pounds, sir. (SIGHS)

MAN 2: (ON TV) Secure after group blow.



It's the boss.

At this hour?


Well, it's never too late for congratulations.


Cliff! Jesus, you're still at the office?

CLIFF: You ran a commercial?

Yeah. And, oh, my God, let me tell you, the response has been...

You ran a commercial without ever showing it to me?

Without first consulting me and my partners?

Did you actually think that was going to fly?

JIMMY: I was planning on telling you in the morning.

The day after it aired!

I only ran it once. Just in one small market.

It was kind of an experiment, all right kind of under the radar.

And in all fairness, you did tell me client outreach was my department.

CLIFF: Don't be disingenuous.

This commercial, I take it my firm's name is mentioned?

Yes. Yeah.


Howard said you were a little eccentric.

He didn't tell me you were a goddamn arsonist!

Cliff, to be fair, I don't think...


I apologize if there was any misreading of the situation on my part.

But there's a very positive headline here.

We got 103 phone calls today.

Off a measly $700 ad buy!

Now, that kind of return on investment, you can't...

Tomorrow morning. 8:00. My office, with the partners.

And we want to see this thing.

Cliff, when you see this, I know you'll...

Yeah, Cliff.

Thank you. Yeah, you too.

Okay. See ya.

Golden Boy. (SIGHS)

That's me. (CHUCKLES)



So, what'd I miss? Anything blow up yet?


Feeling cautious?

You going to tell me what we're doing here?

I've got a problem.

Okay. This problem, I can't solve it myself.

This problem, is it a who or a what?

There's a guy.

I need him to go away.