The year this story takes place is the year nearly everything happened to me.
It was the year I moved from the city to a backwards hick town to finish high school.
It was the year an industrial fire wouldn't stop burning just outside of town.
In other news, the industrial fire continues to rage.
The year my dad first discovered an itch that much later became cancer and, later still, took all his hair and then his life.
It was the year a serial killer wearing a white suit roamed the county, leaving pretty young kids dead in his wake.
But mostly, it was the year where I tried to become someone else for a while, and for the first time, I went crazy insane for love.
And it seemed like the whole world was about to end.
But in the beginning, I didn't see any of this in my future.
I just crossed an X on my calendar and suddenly I was once again the new girl at a new school where no one would talk to me.
Got anything metal on you?
Don't... think so. Well, you must.
A bowling ball.
Have you ever entered a room where you just knew everyone hated you?
Now, multiply that by roughly a million and you'll understand my high school experience.
When I know people hate me, instead of trying to change their minds, I get defensive and weird and become the exact girl they think I am.
But this school wasn't just mean and gossipy; it was full-on scary.
To give you an idea, let me tell you the legend of Laura Lee.
Is it negative five?
Laura Lee was a student at our school who danced nights at a strip club.
Kool thing sittin' with a kiddie Now you know you're sure lookin' pretty Nobody talked to her, but the entire football team would heat up coins with butane lighters and flick them at her as she walked through the hallways.
Burning currency bounced off her like hail.
I don't think so I don't wanna
I don't think so Kool thing let me play with your radio Move me turn me on Baby-o But what's amazing, is that this poor girl's attendance record was perfect.
I mean, here she is dancing every night until 2:00 or later, dodging fiery coins and, still, she makes it to twice as many classes as most people.
This is full-on triumph of the human spirit, but you never see this shit on Oprah.
And then, last March, some girls were playing in a field...
... when they found her body.
All over her legs, splotchy and scorched, were the burned imprints of various coins.
Few details are known about the ongoing investigation, but police sources say they are looking for a male suspect wearing a white suit.
And that was life at Hargrove High.
People, get to class! Now!
Hey. Wanna come smoke weed with us after class?
Um... sure, that'd be cool.
It will be.
What's your name again?
Well, I'm Paul.
Charles, Craig and Thurston.
Yeah, we met.
So why would you ever move to a place like this?
Ugh, well, my dad works for this huge development--
Dude, you're not even inhaling.
I'm inhaling. You're basically making out with it.
You got your goober all over it.
I was now attending the most drugged-out high school in the whole country, honest to God.
These guys smoked pot, sniffed glue, snorted crystal, did Ecstasy in toilets, anything to kill the boredom.
But Thurston... he had reasons of his own.
The face that you saw in the door Isn't looking at you anymore
The name That you call in its place Isn't waiting for your embrace
The world that you love to behold Cannot hold you Anymore
In a matter of time Hey, Thurston.
It would slip from my mind
In and out of my life
... these papers are just...
Do you really hate school that much?
Is it me?
Is it because I let you call me Barry?
Look... you know, I just... I just moved back to this town and I gotta tell ya, this place has become a real shit-hole.
But I was you. And I know you've got real thoughts going on inside of there.
So for tomorrow, no reading.
I want you to write me a three-page essay on the historical or religious figure who you most admire.
Tell me who it is that you think you are.
I don't know why the idea came to me when it did, but I instantly knew it would make life more interesting.
Don't we all wanna be somebody different sometimes?
Someone smarter and sexier and bolder than we really are?
Or maybe I just looked and saw someone that was as lonely as me.
After my mom died and we started moving all the time, it was like my dad and I had all this love to give but no one to give it to.
Or maybe I just went a little crazy.
For a while there, it seemed like craziness was in the air.
We were all just... breathing it in.
You wanted to see me?
Yeah, I wanted to talk to you about something.
Go ahead. Well, I wanted to... tell you that I am new here, and so far I hate it.
Okay, but... if you work hard--
The guys here are... so immature. And sexist.
And the girls are worse.
They eat it up. No self-respect.
And it's just all so... different from where we're supposed to be at this point in women's history, you know?
I wish I could argue.
I went to this party where they were passing out Rohypnol.
That's the date rape drug.
I know what roofies are.
How, uh.... old are you?
I'm not gonna answer that.
A babe in the woods. Anyway...
I wanted to let you know you're not alone.
Here's my paper.
Just point your foot and kick it. Just... don't be like a pansy.
Oh! Ooh. Shit.
You okay? Ah...
Yeah. Yep. Yeah.
Pretty smooth, huh?
I don't even like skateboarding.
Yeah, well, you should go walk it off.
Oh, uh, are you...? Can I walk it off with you?
... do you even remember meeting me at that party?
Of course I do.
I'm really sorry about-- Oh, yeah, no, it's... it's okay.
... Miss Wexler...
What do you think of our fine town this far?
Um... Mm. Well, we're waiting.
I think it's a stupefyingly friendly place full of wholesome, God-fearing, gun-bearing... folk.
It's not all that bad. Just gotta give people a chance.
Are you... are you high?
There's more incest in this town than in an Atom Egoyan film.
I said there's a lot of incest here. Ah, yes.
Incest. A game the whole family can play.
Uh, I... I should go.
As always, it was a treat having you on the program, Miss Wexler.
Until next time!
The first time I met Thurston, he approached me at a party, trying his best to be charming.
And then I guess things went wrong for him.
He believed he was the unluckiest person alive.
How was school today, Lily? The kids in my class are stupid.
How was school today, Lily? The kids in my class are stupid.
I doubt that.
Tyler Jenkins can't even read.
The Jenkins are crackers.
Watch your French, Thurston.
I'm sure Tyler's trying. Mom, he is a cracker. He has six toes.
I'm sure there's some advantage to that, like maybe swimming.
Oh... God, no.
Ahem. I dunno...
It's not your fault. Well, I... I'm not doing the dishes.
I love you more than oxygen.
Please come rescue me from these fools.
Hi, Mr. A.
Caroline. Can I come in?
The mat says "welcome."
I hate that mat.
You know, there's a serial killer running around with a white suit on.
You really shouldn't joke about things like that.
You're the one who won't let me in. I might die.
Who's this? Ah, that's my wife.
Where is she? She's in the other room.
Yeah, we're crazy in love. It's wonderful.
Um... I should... leave.
I'm kidding. It's my sister.
That's why she looks like me with long hair.
Caroline... to tell you the truth, I know what you're doing.
I read your paper.
You didn't like my paper? I have a hard time believing that Monica Lewinsky is the historical figure you most admire.
I was critical.
I said her problem was she lacked discretion.
She had a good thing going and she blew it.
Can I give you a lift home? You should really leave.
Ah... Ooh, can I have some wine?
No, no! Absolutely not! No, hey...
This is like when people describe a car crash happening in slow motion.
You need to relax.
I am the one seducing you.
Besides, I find you very handsome.
My mom once told me that if you ever want to make a man happy...
... flatter his vanity.
Tell him he's handsome.
She said not to bother calling him interesting or clever, because that's what their bosses and colleagues are for.
But every man carries a secret dream of being handsome, and desperately yearns to be recognized as such.
So I read your papers and, overall, they are an improvement.
... punctuation and structure are still... still a mess.
Uh, so to remedy this, I will be offering private tutorials after class to anyone who's interested.
The, um... schedule will begin in reverse alphabetical order, which means that, uh...
... Wexler, Caroline, you're up tonight.
Oops, I'm sorry.
Oh, this is so wrong. Oh, relax.
I don't wanna be a father figure. Oh, my God...
I already have one of those, thank you.
You promise me you won't tell anybody? I promise.
Promise? I promise, I promise.
Before we go any further, I should tell you the story of Thurston and Rolly.
God that was strange To see you again Introduced by a friend of a friend Smiled and said yes I think we've met before Hey, you can't smoke in here. Why? Those people are smoking.
Yeah, but this is my house, and I get decide who can smoke, and you can't smoke.
Hey, man, you probably shouldn't be doing that.
Why not? It's my house I'm throwing 'em at.
This scar is a fleck on my porcelain skin Tried to reach deep But you couldn't get in Now you're outside me You see all the beauty Repent all your sin Hi.
It's nothing but time and a face That you lose I chose to feel it
Fantastic. Fan-fucking-tastic, man.
What a great girl.
She has big lips.
You think she has a boyfriend?
Oh, who gives a shit.
Girl like that's born with a boyfriend, I guess.
So you steal her away.
Yeah, fuck, yeah.
It's not always so easy, though. Ah, man, if you're fated to be with a girl, you gotta fight for her.
Yeah, but I don't really believe in all that shit.
You don't believe in fate?
No. Well, you... you believe in love, don't you?
I mean, yeah, I guess.
If you believe in love...
... you have to believe in fate.
Trust me, okay, I think about this shit all the time.
Thurston, wake up.
Wake up! Ah...
What's wrong? My leg.
You all right? My leg, I think it's fucked-up real bad. Oh...
What, "oh"? Ah!
Oh, I got drugs in my pocket.
You gotta hide 'em before the police come, or I'm royally fucked. Thurston!
Sorry. Yeah, no, okay. Ah...
You boys all right down there? I called the police.
They're on their way Oh, no, we're okay, thank you.
Call back and tell them not to come. You need any help?
Uh, no, thank you!
What? Mind you own fucking business!
Thurston told me that standing there in the middle of the forest, all the life suddenly went out of him and he was demoted from hero to victim.
But with that shift of responsibility came a great peace.
What Thurston didn't know was that a man in a grey suit - not the killer at all, but just some poor guy in the wrong place at the wrong time - was doing everything he could to save Rolly's life.
Later the doctor said Rolly had been hemorrhaging internally and there was nothing anyone could've done.
And though he could hear the distant sirens, Thurston knew that an ambulance can only go so fast.
And even in the midst of all this, he was dreaming of us building a cabin in the mountains, away from it all.
But that would have to wait, because his life was miracle of bad luck.
And that's how Thurston fell in love and watched his friend die on the same night.
Wake up, wake up, wake up! Please stop.
It's the Lord's day! It's the day the Lord rested--
No, it's not. Guess what I did.
What? Made breakfast for you.
What'd you make? Happy eggs.
Why are they happy?
Because they're for you, mon professeur de les oeufs.
That coffee's terrible, babe.
Well, excuse me, I've never made coffee before.
Really? You're in the gifted program; it should be easy.
Sorry, Mr. A.
Mm. Eggs are good, though.
All right, don't get cocky.
Good morning, sir. Is Caroline home?
No, she spent the night with some friends.
She has friends?
What's your name, son? Oh, I'm sorry, sometimes I misplace my manners. My name's Thurston.
Thurston. Mr. Wexler. Nice to meet you, sir.
Good to meet you. Uh... can I, uh, can I ask you something, Mr. Wexler? Sure.
Do you feel like, uh, your daughter's happy here?
Y -y-you trying to sell me something? What?
Why? Uh, no, I just, uh...
Can I come in?
Oh, sorry. Yeah, that's weird.
I sometimes just wonder if Caroline's, uh... integrating well with people.
I'm gonna close the door now, okay, Thurston?
Right. Well, uh...
... nice to meet you, sir. See, we've already done that.
So you can just go.
Okay. All right. Okay. All right.
Have a good day.
Yeah, you, too. Okay. Bye.
Bye. It was nice to meet you.
Today, we're gonna go over the scientific process.
I see the usual crew of jokers are AWOL, so maybe we'll actually get something accomplished.
The first step of any experiment... is to assemble the necessary tools.
Charles, you got papers?
Check. Next, review your thesis statement.
What exactly are you trying to prove?
I am completely confident that something in this kitchen will get us high.
Now let the experimenting begin.
Pure vanilla extract.
Well, now that you're all done, write up your results and clean your workspace.
I hope this did something to expand your young minds.
We gotta go to class.
If you guys skip Ms. Budge's class, you're gonna be screwed.
Guys, I don't feel too good.
... do you guys think that maybe we could...
... talk about what happened to Rolly sometime?
Is there anything you wanna say?
I dunno, I just...
His funeral was-- The funeral was bullshit.
It was fucked, right? Yeah.
It was weird.
I didn't even know his name was Roland.
I keep, uh... I keep having this dream where I see him standing outside my window.
I am way too high to be dealing with this right now.
Plus we need to go, man.
Sorry, I just had... a bad stoner moment.
Let's go to class. Before I start, I wanna talk about something that's been affecting our community.
Now, I know you're all young and indestructible...
... but another girl in Hargrove County has gone missing. So these curfews are for your own good.
Craig. Craig. Yeah.
You all right?
Yeah, I'm... I'm fine.
Then pay attention.
Oh, my God. What?
Oh, my God, Angie, go and get the school nurse now!
Wh-wh-wh-what are you talking about? Everybody, just, um, give him... give him some room to breathe.
What's wrong with you people?! Craig!
The doctor said it was some kind of drug-induced seizure.
You know, there's a real problem at this school, and no one has the courage to talk about it.
I'm here for him. Oh, is it time for your tutorial already? Mm-hmm.
So you tutor now?
Ah... You some kind of super teacher?
He goes way above the call of duty.
Yeah, well, he can't help you today, 'cause he promised he'd help me with the track team. Isn't that right, Barry?
Um, I've been waiting here and I would like to be tutored.
Well, you're gonna have to learn to live with disappointment.
Fuck you, gym bitch. What'd you say?
I'm sorry, Miss Wexler, but we're going to have to reschedule.
She called me a bitch.
After that, I rode out to the old satellite dish, where I sat and pondered what turns of fate had brought me to such a reprehensible place in life.
Red oak Sugar And Korean dogwood I knew that Mr. Anderson was nervous about our relationship.
Though our age difference was only two years more than the one between my father and my mom.
Lit by mission moonlight Kangas on that hillside Before long, the sound of the wind in the grass lulled me into slumber.
And though dreams are by definition strange, the dream I slipped into was particularly odd, because it was not my own, but someone else's.
I dreamt that Thurston and I were living in mountain cabin far from the world. I churned butter while he chopped wood and we lived only for love.
One blue day, Thurston hired an airplane to write my name in the sky.
But either the pilot was drunk, or I had married an illiterate, because the word that he spelled was just an illegible jumble of consonants and vowels.
I knew than that our love was not some idealized state, but a union of secrets and flaws, and it broke my heart to think such things.
Oh, hey, baby.
How's the track team doing?
Ah... Look, I'm sorry about that.
It's just, you know, things are starting to look a little suspicious. Have you fucked her yet?
No! No. We're at some... cheapo restaurant where they keep bringing out sparklers and singing Happy Birthday.
Caroline, look, I-I-I'm a single guy living in a small town of gossips.
I gotta go out with somebody sometime.
Yeah, well, how would you like it if I did that?
Yeah, you... Yeah.
You probably should.
Oh, you're saying I should date some high school idiot?
Yeah. I dunno, look, it's really loud in here, and you're cracking up. Oh, no, no, no, don't do this.
I can't... Caroline, you're cracking up.
I promise you I'll call you later, okay? But...
Okay, just a second.
Hi. Is Thurston home?
Yes. Come on in.
Thank you. Uh... Lily?
Go tell Thurston that his friend... Caroline.
-... Caroline is here.
I hope you don't mind me saying this, but you are a beautiful young lady.
Oh... Thank you.
I love your hair. Do you?
It's usually horrible.
Oh, mine's like straw.
No, it's so pretty. Oh...
Oh. Okay, well, I'll leave you two.
I hope my mom didn't say anything embarrassing.
Oh, no, she's nice.
Although she did say you still wet the bed, so...
Just kidding. Bad joke.
Oh... well, 'cause, I mean, I do still wet the bed and I was wondering how you knew that.
Well, we've got a real...
Algonquin Table wit going on here, don't we?
Anyway, I think you're cute, and I wanna go out with you.
Really? Yes. Yeah. Okay, let's go.
Okay. Uh, hey, Mom, I'll be back in a bit. Nice to meet you!
So, um, do you have any... condoms?
Uh... no, I... I didn't, uh, think to bring any.
Well, I guess you're gonna miss out, then.
Well, uh, we could... we could get some from Paul's.
Just fuckin' with you. I have some in my bag, actually.
Oh... okay. Great.
Okay, here, just put it on fast.
Okay. Uh, do you mind if I put on some... music or something? Ah...
Put it... A little...
I'm kinda nervous.
Thurston, there is a seatbelt stabbing into my ovaries.
I think it might be a little late for... romance and stuff.
All right, fine.
Okay, here it goes.
Don't be sorry.
Did you hear that? I don't know.
What the fuck?
Someone is throwing shit at the car.
Do you think you could, uh, go figure out what the fuck that was?
Do you mind playing the role of the man here maybe?
Let's just get the fuck outta here.
How'd it go?
We had sex.
So for those of you who finished with Jane Austen, feel free to start with Faulkner. Otherwise, read, read, read.
Caroline, could I see you after class, please?
I don't know if I have time. Make time?
So how was Ms. Budge in the sack?
Did she wear her whistle? Actually, I spent half the evening talking her out of suspending you for calling her "gym bitch."
Look. For the first time, you're acting your age; and it really doesn't suit you.
Oh, right back at you, Mr. Polanski.
This is great.
... great, but... but you gotta be aware that people are watching me.
Does it make you feel special? Could we stop with the sarcasm, please?
I wanna spend the weekend with you at my place.
I'll cook dinner, we'll play board games--
Really? Just us alone?
Yep, no gym teachers for miles. Mm, good.
This... is my novel.
Well, first 70 pages, anyway.
My agent is the only one who's read it; he thinks it's the best thing I've ever done. I-I-I'm so inspired when I'm with you.
I want you to read it, tell me what you think.
I think you should, uh... lock the door.
Oh, yeah, Miss Wexler?
Lock it, Shakespeare.
What'd you call me? I think I just called you a slut, slut.
Because everyone knows you've banged, like, 40 different guys since you came here.
Okay, let's just say I have banged 40 guys - what's the problem?
You're just jealous 'cause you've been, uh... brainwashed by puritanical assholes who believe sex is a sin.
Then again, your, uh, little... gerbil-sized brain has been reprogrammed by the media to believe sex is the be-all/end-all.
So now you're stuck, right? 'Cause on one hand, you love to fuck, but afterwards you feel overwhelmed by guilt and you're not sure why.
Maybe it's because sex is neither as good or as evil as you've built it up to be.
Shut up, slut.
Listen to me.
The highlight of your entire life... is gonna be your yearbook photo.
You are already nostalgic for shit that has not even happened yet, 'cause you have so precious little to look forward to.
You're gonna spend the first half of your life planning your wedding, you're gonna spend the second half regretting it.
And if I were you, and thank God I'm not 'cause you have terrible hair, I would stop and I would reconsider your whole value system, because everything you know... is wrong.
I'm such a bitch.
Okay, so I guess I've avoided talking about myself for long enough.
All I really know is that I'm just about the moodiest girl in the world.
I can't see anything at all All I see is me That's clear enough That's what's important To see me My eyes can focus My brain is talking It looks pretty good to me
I swear to God, sometimes I get super depressed.
A year after my mom died, I found a photo album with all these pictures of my family.
It was weird to see us so happy, still looking forward to something, with no idea what was about to happen.
Anyway, for two weeks afterwards, I was so depressed, I couldn't even leave my room, I was so sad.
My dad took me to a doctor who said I was suffering from lack of serotonin to the brain.
They gave me pills and I zombied out for six months and watched game shows.
I know you probably think I'm a manipulative bitch for sleeping with two guys, but try looking at it this way: the sexual revolution is just like any other revolution - there's gonna be casualties.
Good evening, Mr. Wexler. She's busy studying.
Can I just say a quick hello?
Well, it's just that I, uh... I brought her all these cupcakes.
My mom baked them and I thought it would be a nice gesture.
Well, I'm not paying for those.
No, no, it's a gift.
I'll make sure she gets 'em.
Closing the door-- Whoa, hey, she... she could at least have the courtesy to say something.
I mean, y-you can't treat people like this.
Get your foot out of our doorstep. Did you hear that, Caroline?!
You can't treat me like this! Stop making a fuss.
Get your foot out of my doorway.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm just...
I'm just all fucked-up.
I know, son.
Now get off my property.
I got rid of him for you.
Oh, thanks, Daddy.
You're not, uh, you're not meeting him on this weekend of yours, are you? No.
I told you, it's all girls.
'Cause I know it's none of my business, but I really just don't want you seeing this guy. Dad, I just asked you to get rid of him. Show a little... trust.
His mom makes really good cupcakes.
What do you mean, it didn't work?
Just like I said, I don't think her father likes me.
Why wouldn't he like you? I don't know.
I can't believe he kept the cupcakes.
I'm gonna go over there and take care of this.
Mom, no. I don't think that's a very good idea.
Look, if I do this for you, you promise me, you never treat a woman like your father did.
You never cheat on her. You treat her like homespun gold.
Yeah, of course, Mom. Watch Lily for me.
Wait, you're not gonna do anything embarrassing, are you?
I'm your mother. I don't do anything embarrassing.
I'm too shagadelic for that.
One, two, three... hide!
This weed is wheelchair shit.
Seizures all around tonight, boys.
Hi. Mr. Wexler?
I'm Enid Goldberg.
I made you some more cupcakes. I thought we could talk.
Yeah... Sure, yeah, of course.
Would you like to come in and... and... have a drink?
Thank you so much, yeah.
If you tell anyone I did that, I'll kill your whole family.
What? You haven't told anyone about us, have you? Ah! Stop being so paranoid.
I should find Lily.
Stop being so paranoid. Yeah, man.
Just put on some music.
It happened about four years ago and she, uh...
... she was diagnosed with breast cancer.
Throat cancer, even though she never smoked a day in her life.
And then she passed on about six months after that.
Ah, it's too much.
I'm sorry. Thank you.
You know, the frightening thing is that Caroline looks exactly like her. I mean exactly.
Caroline is beautiful.
But it's very scary being the father of a teenage daughter like her.
Do you want some more? Oh, no.
Oh, well, maybe a little bit.
Yeah, what about... your husband?
Uh, he passed a few years ago.
Well, I don't know, but I'd like to think so.
I hope he's dead in hell. Oh, no, Enid, come on.
Well, why not?
Yeah, why not.
He was a musician and, um... that is really romantic when you are 17, but he was always gone on tour and... and then a few years ago, he just... stopped coming home.
I don't why I'm laughing.
Yes, I do.
Well, I have absolutely no idea why anybody would stop coming home to you.
My son, Thurston...
-... he's a really smart boy. He's just... had a hard time.
I judged him too quickly, I...
Would you like to dance with me?
Do you ever think about God?
Sometimes, in church.
What do you think he looks like?
Kinda like Santa Claus, but with a beard made of clouds and stuff.
And instead of being fat, he's got really good abs.
Yeah, I think you're right.
What's that? Run!
I realize It ain't wise to idealize Or put your life In the hands of any struggle
Keep up. Did you just hear something?
Have you ever thought about growing a moustache?
I'm not 100% sure I can. Maybe after my birthday.
Hey, Thomas, what do you think the end of the world will look like?
Do you think it's just like when you shut off the TV?
Sifting in the sand like a hymn within To help us understand Thomas?
Thomas!! Heaven awaits We're making our last stand Glory bound and sparrow in our hand
Baby, do you not wanna go to school today?
Are you sure?
You look beautiful. You had your mom come to my house to beg for another date?
That is so pathetic! Yes, I agree.
You're such a weirdo.
Yes, I know this! What is your problem?
I don't know! I don't know.
Well, you're fucked, 'cause my dad is forcing me to go out with you, so let's just get this over with, all right?
Pick me up at 8:00.
I-I'll call you!
Hey, baby. Hello.
I am so fucking happy right now.
My book is coming along great.
It's all because of you. Now get over here.
Caroline, your friend is here!
Coming! Uh, gotta go out with this loser, but afterwards I'll come right over, okay?
You have a date? Who's it with?
Come on, you gotta tell me.
Why, are you jealous? Yeah, of course I'm jealous.
Some guy's taking out my girl. Who is it?
Come on, tell me. Tell me, tell me...
That is fantastic!
You gotta read one of his papers sometimes.
They are classic. I gotta go.
All right, well, look, ditch him fast.
I got wine, I got candles...
Okay. Be there soon. All right.
Come on, hurry. Okay. Bye.
I guess I don't really know that much about golf.
No? I've been mini-golfing before, but that's... Not... not quite the same.
No. No, it's not.
H-how's your mom?
Oh, great. Yeah. She... she cut my hair today, actually.
Cut your hair? Yeah.
Yeah, look at that. She did a good job. That's nice.
You think so? Oh, yeah.
I think she kinda screwed the back--
The back? Let me see. Ahem!
We goin' out, or what?
I guess... I guess we're going out. I ain't going.
All right, well, thanks for the beer.
All right. See you later, son. See ya.
Okay, where are we going? What are we doing?
Okay, well, um, first of all, I think that we probably should not have sex together tonight.
I think that's maybe where we went wrong last time.
Okay. That wasn't going to happen anyway.
Look, I know you like me.
I know that that sounds strange because of how cruel you are to me, but I... That does sound strange.
-... but I think that's why you had sex with me so fast.
And, by the way, that was my first time, so...
You're kidding? I will get better... as our relationship progresses.
Oh, my God, why is everyone in this town so delusional?
The girls around here, the highlight of their pathetic lives is gonna be their yearbook photo. That's not true.
They'll spend the first half of their lives planning their weddings and they'll spend the second half regretting them.
No, they'll have kids and be surprisingly happy.
Everybody just cheats on each other.
No, I would never, ever cheat on you.
All right, date's over. You're... insane.
Okay. Well, can I at least talk to you tomorrow at school?
Tomorrow's Saturday, moron.
Look, you can, um...
... call me, okay?
If you want.
Why don't you just give me your face for a second.
Argh! All right, okay, thank you.
Uh, happy Saturday. Yeah, it's--
I got it. You got it.
Sorry I'm tardy, Mr. A.
Come in, quick.
That night, I tried to pretend we were a regular couple.
I've been told I'm living a lie I've been told all my life I've been told I'm living a lie I've been told all my life
But when it was over, I felt more like a fake than ever.
So I crept downstairs to finish reading his manuscript.
The story follows a boy named Larry as he comes of age in a small town.
Larry is convinced that he's a genius.
And like most geniuses, he has trouble fitting in, and so spends nearly all his time high on cheap drugs.
As he grows older, Larry moves to the city and gets engaged to a beautiful stockbroker.
But owing to his misspent youth and drug-addled brain, he never achieves the success he believes the world owes him.
One day, Larry comes home early from work and catches his fiancée and his best friend on a Twister board.
His Twister board.
In a rage, he buys a gun, and decides to become a serial killer, but realizes he doesn't have the nerve and so tries to kill himself. My Twister board!
But chickens out of that, too.
Larry then moves back to his hometown, where he begins indulging in strange behaviour.
Like sometimes he drives through the streets all night, hunting for ghosts long past.
And other times, he calls old friends and pretends to be a telemarketer with a bad fake British accent.
How much do you earn in a year?
What do you think the end of the world will look like?
Are you happy? If so, why? How can you be happy?
Don't you watch the news?
Finally, as in all good tales, Larry is saved by the love of an ethereal young woman.
She is his muse, every guy's wet dream, whose sole purpose is to service his every need.
And only when with this clichéd, vapid little moron does he feel like the genius he knew he'd become.
And I said no no no All that in 70 pages.
So... what do you think?
My book. What do you think?
I think it's very well written.
Yeah, that's what my agent said, too.
I just, uh...
Am I the...
... "ethereal young woman"?
Well, it's, you know, it's fiction, so it's... a bit of an oversimplification.
But, essentially, yeah.
Okay. Should I just... say everything I thought?
Yeah. Of course.
Tell me. Come on, I can take it.
... semi-engaging in that... pseudo-creepy, self-pitying, lonely male kind of way.
But if you have the audacity... the... inaccuracy... to describe me as "ethereal," as some flawless, perfect thing, then fuck you.
No, fuck you. You don't know anything about me.
The only reason you think I am ethereal is because all we do is have sex and flirt and have sex. There is more to you than that.
I know that! I know.
But I'm not here to save you.
I'm the main character of my life!
Calm down. Don't fucking--
Ah! Shit. Ooh.
Um... I'm sorry.
That was an accident. Was it?
Yeah. Can... just give it to me. But...
Where's your soap? I dunno.
It's down by the washing machine. J-j-just don't-don't worry about it.
No, no, no, I do this for my dad all the time.
I'll be back in a second, okay?
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Just a mean... bitch.
Caroline? Don't worry about the shirt.
Let me... let me fix you a nice breakfast.
All I'm sa... No, all I'm saying is that I had a spiritual revelation.
I stepped out of my body and I saw things that I didn't like.
Did you see Rolly?
No, Rolly's dead, dude.
That's a completely different plane of existence.
This is bullshit, man. You took some drugs and you had a fucked-up time. End of story.
Take off the creepy tie.
If I was from Tibet, you'd believe me, though, right?
If I was a young Navajo boy on a vision quest doing a little peyote, my words would be prophetic.
Okay, though, but isn't it possible that inhaling Lysol had something to do with your awakening?
All I know is that some people spend their entire lives searching for the experience I gained with a few simple household products.
And that is nothing to scoff at.
Hey, where are you goin', man?
To be honest, it tires me just looking at you.
you see God once and suddenly you have divine permission to act like an asshole.
When I'm on will you leave me on When I'm on Will you leave me on And when I'm down Will you let me get under
Can't hide without a house Newspapers blow over Can't walk past the driveway Without asking For direction So full of stupid questions When the daylight's like fluorescent light I'm gonna take my time night by night When the daylight's like fluorescent light I hang my hands over your eyes To hide
Why not only rescue me I watch that telephone Got hung up on the word I can't get over
Take cover Take pleasure
Okay, guys, how about a little participation next class?
I really don't like the sound of my own voice that much.
Miss Wexler, could I see you for a minute?
Can't. I have to go. It's important.
Look, I really need to talk to you. This is humiliating for me.
I'll come... see you.
I'll cook dinner?
Hey, Thurston. What's up? Hey, Jenny.
You look really hot today.
Thanks. Uh, I gotta go.
Oh, um... my parents are going away this weekend. Okay.
Yeah, my-my parents are going away and I was thinking about maybe having a Christmas party. Do you wanna come?
Yeah, sure, whatever.
Okay, perfect! I'll text you.
Yeah, okay. Bye!
Concern turned to panic today for residents of Hargrove County...
That afternoon, we made the mistake of watching the news.
Investigators say... You guys know this girl?
-... was abducted sometime late Tuesday afternoon...
Not really. I have friends who know her, but...
I never talked to her. In other news, the industrial fire continues to rage...
The killer had taken another victim, a cheerleader my age.
He plucked her from a charmed life and left no clues.
Meanwhile, the industrial fire was still raging, growing bigger every day.
As the toxic breeze carried fumes our way, some people had taken to wearing masks.
But I knew their real purpose was to provide the illusion of defence.
There are some things which are destined to occur and nobody in the world can do anything to stop it.
Oh how we to and fro to and fro To and fro
Oh how we to and fro To and fro to and fro To and fro
Shit. Oh, shit, I'm supposed to be somewhere right now.
No, no, I'm not letting you go anywhere.
Argh, come mere.
You're mine. When did you get so forceful?
Bonjour. No. Oh!
No. Are you crazy?
Well, let me know how it's going. Okay. Okay, talk soon.
Uh, do you have a minute to answer a few quick questions regarding our survey... uh, against cancer?
I guess if it's quick. It will be, ma'am.
Um, what is the annual income of your household?
I'm not comfortable sharing that. Well, is it above 150,000?
Well, do you consider yourself a happy person?
God, yeah, sure.
As much as anyone.
Um... uh, just one final question.
Wh-what do you think the end of the world will look like?
Who you talking to?
Barry, is that you?
Is that Barry? Hang up the phone. Barry, are you okay?
Hang it up. Don't call back here-- Everyone is worried about you.
Just tell me if you're okay!
Hang it up!
Hey, Mr. A., um...
I really like your new hair.
You look like Brad Pitt.
Jenny, would you close the door after you?
Thurston, I need to have a word. Go ahead and have a seat.
What do you know?
Excuse me? Do you know, or not?
Ab... about your hair? It looks good.
You don't know, do you?
I've been having sex with Caroline.
I'm screwing her? Fucking? Banging?
Whatever it is you kids call it these days, that's what I'm doing to her.
Uh-- See, the thing is, she never even really liked you at all, anyway.
It was just that we needed a cover.
I-I know it's... it's terrible and I'm sorry.
I know what you're thinking right now, as well.
You're thinking, at the bottom of your heart, you knew it was too good to be true.
Well... turns out... you were right.
Huh? Yeah, it looks good. One more.
Okay. Look, here's a black one.
It's nice. Kinda cool.
Looks like an 8-ball.
Hey, Thurston. Get out of my house!
What? Get the fuck outta my house!
No, don't touch me! What's happening?
How could you do it?! Why would you do it?!
Thurston, it's over. I dumped him for you.
It's over. I don't care.
Just get outta my house, you slut! Don't you fucking call me that!
Language, people! She's been cheating on me the entire time! I've just been a cover!
Is that true?
Yes, but it's... No, not the whole time!
It's over. Oh! I don't need your fucking excuses! Just get the fuck away from me!
Oh, I'm so sorry, Enid, I was just...
... trying something stupid.
Ah... I think you better go.
Could you, um...
... tell Thurston I'm sorry?
Okay. Bye, Lily.
Yeah, I tell ya, this serial killer guy?
He's got it all wrong.
I mean, you wanna know how I'd kill someone?
Just stab the fucker with an icicle.
Right through the heart.
Where's the evidence? It's melted.
Murder weapon's water. It's, like, 80% of the human body and like two-thirds of the earth's surface and it just ended your life.
And you didn't drown.
Holy fucking shit, it's the get-along gang!
I was about to finish the cake myself.
What happened to you, man? You fucking pimp, dude.
No. No, I'm... I'm not doing it.
I'm not doing it. Come on, man, you need to... you need to be-- Fine.
We miss the old you, man. I miss the old Craig.
Do you miss the old Craig? Ah, yes, there he is.
He's back. Old Craig is back, man...
What did you say to him?
What did you say to him?!
... we are meant to be together.
Oh, my God.
You are fucking crazy.
Well, you know what I find infuriating, is that you of all people are bowing to social pressure now!
Social pressure? Are you kidding me?!
You think I'm someone I'm not.
I... am... going.
If you leave, I'll kill him!
I mean, I don't mean that. I just... but...
But I might kill myself!
I... I don't know, I just, I'm...
I'm really, really confused right now, Caroline!
I'm gonna pretend you never said that.
This is Thurston, so leave a message.
Thurston, I'm so sorry about what happened.
If you are at the party, just stay at the party.
I'm on my way right now.
I... I screwed up. I know I screwed up.
I just, I... Please, please, please don't do anything stupid.
I love y...
Hey. Hey, what's up?
Hey, do you wanna... do you wanna see rest of my house?
Is it okay if I smoke in here?
Yeah. Do you... do you wanna...
So do you wanna see the rest of my house?
Uh, yeah, sure. Okay.
Um, so this is the--
Did you do all the decorations?
This is my bathroom, and then this is my dad's office.
And this is some other stuff and...
... this is my bedroom.
You sure... really like unicorns, huh?
Yes, I love unicorns.
Thurston, I think you're so hot.
Wait, uh... This is, uh...
This feels very wrong.
Totally. Let me get the lights.
Oh, Barry, you're a pussy.
You're a pussy, Barry. Come on, come on, come on, come on!
Lily, come watch TV with me.
Come watch the tube.
This is wrong. This is wrong. This is wrong!
This is wrong! This is all so wrong!
You try to be good, but you can't! Because it's all wrong! It's all wrong!
It's all so fucking wrong!
Ca-Caroline? It's me.
I've shot myself.
Bullet skimmed my leg.
I think it's pretty bad.
Barry, I can't even hear you. You're cracking up.
Yeah, I know I'm cracking up! I just shot myself, for chrissake!
Sorry, can't hear you.
What? No, no, no, Caroline, no...
Lily, where are you?
Don't do this to me.
This is fucking beautiful.
Okay, wait. Wait.
We should... we should stop. Why?
Uh... because, uh...
It... it wasn't my fault.
I know. I know. The... the road's bad.
It's hard to see.
It... it wasn't my fault.
I was raised... to hate...
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I, uh... I really have to go.
They caught him!
They caught the killer!
They finally caught him.
Oh. Caught who?
They think he, like, crashed his car.
What happened to you? Oh, nothing.
Do you wanna come in and have some dinner?
I have... I have so much to share.
I think you should let me take you to the hospital.
Um... but will you after?
You're in shock.
Just say you'll have dinner with me after.
That would be a dream.
You ready? Yeah.
Does it hurt?
Oh... yeah, it hurts.
Ah... What happened?
Oh, I shot myself.
You found them like this?
There you stood on the edge of your feather
Expecting to fly
When the serial killer died that night, everyone in the hospital cheered and there was even talk of a parade, though it never happened.
From then on, the whole town considered me a hero, but all I had really done was crash my car into the right person.
By the summer It was healing We had said goodbye That was the year that everything happened.
I'm not saying if it was good or bad.
All the years we'd spent with feeling Ended with a cry I mean, you can never really tell what's good until later anyway, until you look back and think about things and they have time to grow in your mind.
Ended with a cry
I tried so hard to stand But sometimes you make a choice in that moment, and you know in your heart it's going to change everything.
So hard to laugh As I stumbled And reached for the love I had found
It was gone
If I never lived without you Now you know I'd die
Hi. If I never said I loved you You need to know he's out of my life.
And I'm sorry...
I screwed everything up.
Are you kidding me?
You saved me.
People will tell you nothing matters, the whole world's about to end soon anyway.
But those people are looking at life the wrong way.
I mean... things don't need to last forever to be perfect.
Live through this And you won't look back Live through this And you won't look back
There's one thing I want to say So I'll be brave You know what I wanted I gave what I gave I'm not sorry I met you
I'm not sorry There's nothing to save
Live through this And you won't look back
Live through this