Hollywood Homicide (2003) Script

♪♪♪ MAN: Shooters, come forward to the 20-yard line.

[BUZZER SOUNDS]

Thanks, Joe.

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Aw, hey ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Y-A riders ♪

♪ Don't get no better ♪

♪ From the women To the weather ♪

♪ Californ-I-A, Y-A Where every day it's Friday ♪

♪ I give the people What they want ♪

♪ Keep the party crankin' ♪

♪ Get all our homeys In the club ♪

♪ Tryin' to make it happen ♪

♪ Roll into the club On a 6-4 hoppin' ♪

♪ Pull up and I see It's already poppin' ♪

♪ And then my squad ♪

♪ Tell me what we're doin' Barbecuin'♪

♪ Doin' it under the influence ♪

♪ So the music Got you movin' ♪

♪ Nobody on the wall ♪

♪ Nobody still at all It's like a protocol ♪

♪ The way I got it 'em all Waxin' their fos up ♪

♪ Ridin' around wit' twenties On their donuts ♪

♪ Pancakes wit' enough bass To insinuate earthquakes ♪

♪ While the sun just bakes ♪

♪ Havin' fun Up in the sunny states ♪

♪ Pumpin' the brakes At the yellow light ♪

♪ My seatbelt on tight ♪

♪ Don't need no cops On my tail tonight ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Summertime ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali in the summertime ♪♪

♪♪♪

[RAPPING INDISTINCTLY]

♪♪♪ Oh, shit.

Yo, K-Ro, where you going?

K-Ro, what's up?

Hey, baby!

♪♪♪

[CHEERING]

[SCREAMING]

Somebody just shot my club up.

That's what I say, shot my club up!

Why do you need to know my name? Just get the police here.

What do you mean, you ain't coming?

I give you first shot at making me an offer on this beautiful four-bedroom Mt. Olympus, and you leave me sitting here for two hours, and now you tell me you ain't...

Hello?

Shit.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Gavilan.

Uh...

Yeah, give me 10 minutes.

Be right there.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Yeah, it's Calden. Oh, shit.

Uh...

I'll be there in seven minutes.

[SIRENS BLARING]

Hey, Joe. How you doing?

Okay. How are you?

Find anybody to buy that house yet?

No. Showed it a couple of times last week.

There's some interest.

I hear we got a messy one here.

Yeah.

Joe, K. C...

Hey, Leon. Hey, Leon.

I'm making you two primaries on this disaster.

Since you've made no progress in the Klepto murder, I figure you're due.

Thanks for the confidence.

Yeah, no problem.

[REPORTERS SHOUTING]

What do we got, Leon?

One on the floor, three backstage.

Rap group, calls itself H2OKlick.

Don't ask me why.

Joint was full?

Yeah.

Nobody saw anything.

Of course not.

These things on?

They were. They're off now.

Listen, get them out of here.

Now. Come on. Let's go, let's go.


Well, what do you think?

Write this down.

Cheeseburger, well done.

Raw onion, pickle, ketchup.

Nothing else.

Got it.

Officer?

Time to get rolling on some chow.

This is what the big dog wants, and I want tomato and cucumber on whole wheat with only mustard and bean sprouts.

Hey, Lou?

Nobody goes in here, okay?

Gotcha.

Looks like one shooter came from down there.

The other came from down there.

This poor son of a bitch got it from both sides.

Yeah.

So, how long you had this place?

Man, I only had this place two years.

This is messed up.

Where you living? At the Bel Age.

Bel Age.

Yeah, right up the road, but it's just temporary quarters.

Where were you when the shootings occurred?

In my office.

Right there.

These guys were about to break out.

Yeah, the boys was blowing up, man.

Sartain Records.

Antoine Sartain, that's the big man.

These guys have any trouble?

Some sort of turf war going on?

Man, I don't know nothing about no East Coast, West Coast, hip-hop, gang-bangin' bullshit.

I'm just a poor country boy trying to get by.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Getting by pretty well, I'd say.

I do okay.

Hello?

Hold on. Hello.

Hello!

Hold on just a second, let me...

Hey, Stan?

Stan, that four-bedroom Mt. Olympus fell through.

Can you make me an offer?

Eddie, you got those shoe prints, right?

Two sets of prints.

You've got matching pattern, different sizes.

That's a 9, that's an 11.

Hey, you. Come here.

I see mayonnaise.

Did anybody in this room hear me say the word "mayonnaise"?

Read your notes. What does it say?

Cheeseburger, well done, raw onion, ketchup, pickle.

You call that well done?

In addition to the mayonnaise, I see lettuce...

Lettuce that somebody tried to scrape off here.

This is a disaster.

What the hell do they teach you at the Academy?

You want to be a detective when you grow up?

Yes, sir.

Don't call me "sir." I work for a living.

Dump this for me, please.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

I expect better.

Joe, the kid's got something.

Gavilan.

No, 675 won't fly.

If you get back to me, you've got to have seven and change.

Diamond earring.

Could be something, could be nothing.

Good work, kid.

Did you get the puddle of piss and the shoe prints in the electrical closet?

Yeah, I got it, Joe.

I'm going to go hammer on the owner a little more.

How come you got no video surveillance, big-ass place like this?

What kind of security you got?

I ain't never had no problems in my place.

Well, you got a problem now.

Two guys sneak in here with guns.

Who does your security, anyway?

A bunch of off-duty L.A.P.D. Cops.

Well, that's your first mistake.

Man, why you ragging on me?

All I'm trying to do is just business.

Julius, you're making me curious.

How come you live in a hotel?

I just sold my crib.

The new one fell through, so I'm sort of like looking right now.

You're sort of like looking for a new house?

That's what I said.

Julius, look, in my other career, I'm a real estate broker.

Real estate broker? You got two jobs?

We work a lot of overtime.

We get a lot of time off.

A lot of guys have three jobs.

So what you saying, cop?

What I'm saying to you is I got a beautiful 3,400 square-foot house up on Mt. Olympus.

New roof, partial view. Owner's desperate.

Man, I don't want no crap on no Mt. Olympics.

Well, what you looking for?

I'm looking for a big house, something with class.

How much you willing to pay for something with class?

Not a penny more than six.

Six?

That's what I said. Six.

Million?

I was not soliciting. I was doing research.

Research is not soliciting.

I've never had to pay for sex.

I have four BAFTA nominations.

Hey.

Evening, Gloria.

Do you know who I am?

Here's our dead guys.

Thanks.

Puddle of piss makes me think we got a witness.

Sit down there and shut up!

I can't work here. This place is a zoo.

Let's get out of here before Boardner's closes.

The doctor's in. Help is on its way.

Thanks, Hank.

Something wrong, Joe?

What do you mean, something wrong?

You seem down.

Down? Me?

Lately.

We've been partners for what, four months?

Now you want to be my shrink?

Sometimes it helps to talk. That's all I'm saying.

All right.

Let me paint you a picture.

Portrait of Joe Gavilan.

Seven, eight years ago, I sold off the results of my entrepreneurial efforts up to that point.

Three tanning salons and two original silk-tip nail parlors in the Antelope Valley, and I started attending weekend real estate seminars at the Airport Hyatt.

You know, "How to Make $1 Million in Real Estate with Very Little Money Down."

Sounds good.

Started out with a condo in Sherman Oaks.

Slapped some paint on the walls.

Refaced the kitchen cabinets.

Traded up to a smoke-damaged ranch in Tarzana, then a Spanish on Outpost and a fake Mediterranean in Los Feliz.

Pretty soon, I had everything I've got tied up in this... this monstrosity... on Mt. Olympus, at the corner of Hercules and, I shit you not, Achilles.

So what's the problem?

The problem is if I don't score a big commission or get rid of this... piece of shit on Mt. Olympics...

Well, the word Titanic comes to mind.

Joe, I know a girl who works for some rich producer.

Says that he might be selling his place.

Maybe you can get the listing.

Got a name?

Well, her name's, like, Mimi or Moma or something like that. I don't remember.

Not the girl, hot rocks. The producer.

I don't know the producer. Way before my time. I...

Hey, Joe, you ready for something?

Shoot.

I don't think I want to be a cop anymore.

Come on, you need some fresh air.

Put this on my tab, Hank.

What tab?

Hey, I got it.

I got it. It's okay.

Here.

Well, if you don't want to be a cop, what do you want to be?

I want to be an actor.

You want to be what?

An actor.

What?

Okay...

You're gay. I can deal with that.

You know I'm not gay.

Why do you want to do something stupid like acting?

Because it's my bliss... and I have to follow my bliss.

Turning into Oprah around here.

I rented a theater up on Highland Friday night.

I invited some agents and producers.

It's called a showcase.

What are you going to showcase?

My talents.

Mr. Robert De Niro here.

Hey, detective, I know you're going to say it's none of my business, but... when's the last time you got laid?

None of your business.

Right.

♪♪♪ Say it ain't so, Joe.

Oh, my God.

Jesus Christ.

How's business, Jack?

Wanda.

Wanda...

Some trick's thumping on prostitutes.

We put our best female officer undercover and she got hurt, so... I'm the bait.

Well, you look good.

Well, it never hurts to get a compliment, but that's not why I was shaking my booty at you.

I heard you're working that bloodbath over at the Freeway Club.

Yeah.

Word's already out on the street about the shooting.

Word is one guy slid out without a scratch.

Got a name or anything?

Yeah, K-Ro or K-Mart or K-Rock or something like that.

He was the group's main songwriter.

Somebody writes that shit?

Yeah, tell me about it.

Want me to drop you back where I got you?

Yeah, I got backup ready to pick me up.

Just swing me back around to Cherokee.

These heels are killing me.

Just killing me, man.

♪♪♪

♪ Doo-doo-doo doo ♪

♪ Doo-doo doo-doo-doo-doo ♪

♪ People say I'm the life of the party ♪

♪ 'Cause I tell a joke or two ♪

♪ Although I might be laughing Loud and hearty ♪

♪ Deep inside, I'm blue ♪

♪ So take a good look At my face ♪

♪ You see my smile Looks out of place ♪

♪ If you look closer It's easy to trace... ♪♪ This is Ruby the psychic, Ruby the night owl, waiting for your calls, your problems, your concerns.

Want to unravel the past? Ruby can help.

Want to sort out the present? Ruby can help.

Want to look into the future? Ruby can do that too.

Just pick up the phone.

Smokey, where have you been?

Busy guy, Ruby.

Got something to share?

Tell me about the future.

I see some financial concerns. Is that right?

Yep.

Wait a minute.

I'm seeing something dangerous, maybe painful?

What else is new?

Whatever else is new will have to wait.

We're out of time.

Why do you always call so late?

Night owls, this is Ruby.

[DIAL TONE]

Mr. Sartain and I would like to thank the two of you.

I'm Mr. Sartain's colleague, Leroy Wasley.

Tell Mr. Sartain the deed's done.

Now, where's our money?

Here you go.

[GUNSHOTS]

Tell me something.

You think Gavilan can figure this thing out?

Bennie Macko's not going to let him.

He'll take him down first.

Why would Bennie Macko believe all this bullshit you've been feeding him, anyway?

I've known Bennie a long time.

He graduated in the class right behind mine at the Academy.

We were rookies together in the same division.

He's a politically ambitious suit.

He listens to what I tell him.

Patience is not one of my virtues.

Let me explain something to you.

You can kill a street punk like Klepto.

It's no big deal.

These two bangers, they didn't mean anything to anybody, but you send them into an open nightclub and they cap four guys?

That's another mess altogether.

The last time I checked, I pay you to run my security, not your mouth.

♪ This right here is payback From way back ♪

♪ I don't play that ♪

♪ This right here is payback From way back ♪

♪ I don't play that ♪

♪ This right here is payback From way back ♪

♪ I don't play that ♪

♪ Gotta get 'em up ♪

♪ Who wants some? ♪

♪ You better get 'em up ♪

♪ Come get some ♪

♪ You gotta get 'em up ♪

♪ Who wants some? ♪

♪ You better get 'em up ♪

♪ Come get some ♪

♪ You gotta get 'em up ♪

♪ Who wants some? ♪

♪ You better get 'em up ♪

♪ Come get some ♪

♪ You gotta get 'em up ♪

♪ Who wants some? ♪

♪ Better get 'em up ♪

♪ I don't play that ♪

♪ This right here is payback From way back ♪

♪ I don't play that ♪

♪ This right here is payback From way back ♪

♪ I don't play that ♪♪

♪♪♪

Let go of me, you sons of bitches!

Stella!

♪♪♪ Not a knickknack knit-lock knock-kneed knickerbocker sock off a hodgepodge, moss-blotched, botched scotch block...

I got more time in the third-floor crapper than you do on the job, pal.

You can't open my locker without a search warrant.

I know my rights.

Well, I appreciate a man who knows his rights.

There you go.

What's going on here, Captain?

This is Lieutenant Bennie Macko, Internal Affairs.

Joe, you got a right to an attorney.

This is a fully authorized investigation within the jurisdiction and the purview of the Charter of the City of Los Angeles...

Oh, please. I'll open it.

Go ahead.

I haven't been in there in 10 years.

You open it.

Open it.

Oh.

Here are those shoes. I thought I lost these.

I love these shoes.

Ever clean your locker?

Between finding, apprehending, and convicting murderers and cleaning my locker, I kind of made a career decision to do the former.

You got a lot of lip. I got a lot of lip?

Yeah, you do. I got a big nose too.

Calden, open your locker. Why him?

Because he's your partner. Open it.

Go ahead, open it.

No, don't open it.

You got something to hide?

Yeah, kind of.

You got to do it, son.


Porno.

Commingling funds, huh?

That's my crime? Commingling?

Guilty.

My alimony number one comes from money commingled with my beer money.

My refinanced car commingled with the short-term loan to keep the second mortgage paid off, commingled with my alimony number three, commingled with every goddamn dime I've got tied up in my Mt. Olympus property.

My whole life's commingled.

Well, I'm glad you brought up the property on Mt. Olympus.

You're attempting to sell it without disclosing you also own it.

This isn't about real estate, is it, Bennie?

Bennie, what the hell's going on here?

Look, as immediate supervisor of these men, you are bound to inform me of any investigation involving my section.

You're so informed.

You couldn't have told me first?

Welcome to the party, Leon.

I'm trying to find out what I'm guilty of, besides going to one too many airport real estate seminars.

Well, for starters, Sergeant, you know a woman named Cleo Ricard?

I talk to her. Talk's cheap.

Because Administrative Vice, which has been watching her for two years, is on the verge of making a major prostitution bust, and you're in there making promises to her to intervene.

You haven't registered her as an informant.

Joe, is this true?

By itself, that's cause for suspension.

I mentioned her name to District Attorney Gardner six weeks ago, told him I was going to make a contact.

He denies that. He's a liar.

I haven't registered her as an informant because she hasn't informed yet.

I don't want to get buried under a mountain of paperwork just so Vice can tell me to back off their suspect.

It's a big case for them.

Bigger than a quadruple murder?

Hey, this is not your decision.

Man...

As no charges have been made, I request that you release Sergeant Gavilan and Sergeant Calden so they can resume their investigations.

Bennie?

Yeah, we'll talk about it... when he's out of the room.

Fuck you very much.

What is with that Macko guy?

Ah, he's a jerk.

A couple years ago, he was lead detective on those jockey love-nest murders.

You remember. Big girls, little guys?

He was bragging to the papers, and I proved he had the wrong guy.

Embarrassed the shit out of him.

He's been wanting to get me ever since.

Now he's assigned to I.A., and he's taking his shot.

You can't trust cops.

Your dad was a cop.

Yeah, he was killed in the line of duty under some bullshit circumstances.

No one was held responsible, and his case was closed.

The feds investigate?

The word is they thought his partner was dirty, but the report's sealed... tight.

Well, I got a pal down there who owes me a favor.

Want to see the report, I'll make a call.

I'd appreciate it, yeah.

Hey, Joe, listen, what I said last night about you getting laid...

It's none of my business, you know?

It's no big deal.

Hey, just... be safe.

Safe?

Yeah.

Oh. Ha ha ha ha.

That hooker last night.

That was a guy.

I don't need to know that.

That was a cop.

That was a guy cop.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

A cop guy.

Okay.

Gavilan.

Hello, Joe.

Cleo.

I was just talking about you.

Well, I hope you were saying something good.

Listen, Joe, I have a little problem.

Vice is breathing down my neck.

Yeah, well, I.A.'s breathing down mine.

Let's go.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Come on, big boy.

Well, I might have something for you.

I'm listening.

Yeah, hi, is this the William Morris Agency?

Yeah, hi, this is K.C. Calden.

I sent a headshot, a resume, and an invitation to a performance of Streetcar Named Desire.

Hold him while I get something out of the trunk.

Whoa, where you going?

Yes, yes, it's on Friday.

One of the girls that works for me was a regular for one of the guys that got shot last night.

She was also a regular of Klepto's.

Well, you talk to Vice and get them to back off me, and I'll talk to the girl.

That's not the way it works.

You give me the girl, then I'll talk to Vice.

Joe, why don't I send you over a couple of ladies?

Big mistake. Big, big mistake.

You could have a party.

On me.

We'll keep it out of the book.

What do you say, hmm?

Not my style, Cleo.

Call me back when you got something real.

Yeah, I'll be playing the Brando part.

Hello?

Let's go.

[GUNSHOTS]

I'll call you back.

♪♪♪ Whoo-hoo! Ya!

I'm going to take him, Joe.

No, no, no! The gun's still hot!

Stay down there. Stay down.

Stay down, man. Stay there.

Got a live gun here.

You're going to get yourself shot.

What are you talking about? It's a standard-issue Beretta.

15 shots. I counted.

And one in the spout.

Oh, shit.

Did you lose this?

How do I look?

You look all right.

Many thanks. Now the buttons.

I can't do nothing with them.

You men with your big clumsy fingers.

May I have a drag on your cig?

What?

Okay...

Who writes this stuff?

Look, it's not stuff. It's art.

In fact, it's one of the greatest plays ever written, and it's not the words you're having trouble with.

It's the intention.

It's the lack of conviction.

If you give it some conviction, then I can believe it and we can have a back-and-forth.

I know you're playing a girl, but come on...

Whoa, whoa, wait.

What is this about? Just read the lines.

It's your turn.

You look like you raided some stylish shops in Paris.

Wait a second, you skipped a line.

As a matter of fact, you skipped a bunch of lines.

Um... Never mind.

We're here.

♪♪♪ K.C. Calden, Hollywood Homicide.

We're here to see Antoine Sartain.

He's in Recording Studio B, I think.

Is he expecting you?

Uh, kind of.

Hollywood Homicide.

I want to talk to Antoine Sartain.

You gentlemen have an appointment?

You off-duty L.A.P. D?

You going to give me a hard time, huh?

It's called a homicide investigation, man.

Yeah?

Well, you're not going in.

Oh, my God, he has a badge and a gun.

Get out of the way, will you, pal?

What, a cop's going to hit a cop now?

That's a good suggestion.

I'm filing police brutality charges.

Assault, harassment...

Let me help you out there.

[PHONE DIALING]

Sergeant Willoughby?

Gavilan. How's Betty?

The kids?

Okay, good. Look, I got an off-duty cop here who wants to file a complaint against me.

Hold on a second.

There's been a misunderstanding.

Thanks a lot.

[HIP-HOP PLAYING]

Finally. This is the take.

This is the one, right here.

This is it, Butch. This is the one.

Yo, that's it. Come on in.

That's the best take.

We need some bells or something, because this ain't happening.

Bells?

Everybody's using bells, man.

We need some radio... Nobody cares about your opinion.

Guys, excuse me.

My opinion is gold!

Antoine Sartain?

L.A.P.D. Homicide.

What's this guy supposed to be, man?

I'm looking for Mr. Antoine Sartain.

Turn the music down.

Chill on the real. On the real, chill.

What you want, man? You know what?

You Hollywood dicks are all the same.

Oh, yeah, uh-huh. You all saw that, right?

Yeah, that's police brutality.

Don't think I won't report you.

Help me out here. Do you know this guy?

Help me out.

Do you know this guy?

Because I don't recognize him.

These the same guys?

These your friends?

Yeah, we know these guys.

That's my boy, man.

Do you know where I can find Mr. Sartain?

He just left. He's on the 10th floor.

The elevator's over there.

Thank you very much.

K.C. Calden?

Silk Brown, baby. Crenshaw High?

Oh, yeah, man. How you doing, brother?

I'm all right. Told you I knew this dude.

I'm going to stick around here for awhile and see if I can find out anything.

Look at him!

I didn't know you were a cop, man.

You know, actually, I'm thinking about getting out of this L.A.P.D. Shit.

What you working, man?

Oh, you know, I did some acting in high school.

Thinking about checking out the whole movie thing.

There it is. I knew we came here for a reason.

Baby, talk to him. Go ahead.

Well, uh, actually, I did a Jell-O commercial once.

That's right. The blue Jell-O girl.

That was me. "J-E-L-L-O."

You did a great job in that. Congratulations.

Thank you very much.

She sold a shitload of Jell-O too.

I believe that.

This is nice.

I'm trying to imagine what it was like when this was all still glamorous.

It's been a long time since anything happened at Hollywood and Vine, huh?

Can I offer you something? Anything?

No, I just want to ask a few questions.

Oh, sure. Sure.

Have a seat, please.

Thanks.

So, how long ago did you sign, uh...

H2OKlick?

Five years ago.

I don't really know this music. Were they good?

Most people don't know this, but I lose money on 19 out of 20 new groups, but one breakout...

One breakout pays for everything.

Were these guys going to break out?

They had a chance, yeah.

You know these fellows personally?

I can't afford to get too close to any of my acts, because sooner or later, I'm going to have to break their hearts and be the guy that doesn't renew their contracts.

Brutal business, huh?

Brutal business. Brutal.

So, I don't have an agent right now, but I can do accents.

I do English, I do Jamaican, and even Texas, and I even play the piano and tennis.

Yeah, man, she real good, dude.

But look, Silk got this script that's off the hook.

Man, it's tight.

I got a script with Oscar shit written all over it.

Let me tell you what it's called.

Yeah, what's it called, man? Tell him.

Tell him the title.

You will love this title, man.

Tell him the title.

Yeah, let me hear the title.

It's called...

Listen to this.

Nasty.

Ooh!

Tell me that ain't hot.

I'm into titties and shit blowing up, you know what I'm saying?

But nothing exploitive.

You've got to respect the female.

Always.

You know, maybe I can help you out with this, but you guys can help me out too.

You know, give me a call if you hear anything about what's going down with this H2OKlick thing, all right?

We ain't no snitches or nothing like that, you know.

Oh, come on now.

I don't want to ask you to do that.

No, you hold onto that, you know, just in case something comes up.

You never know.

How much time you spend in the joint, Antoine?

Much too long for my taste.

My accountant let me down.

Something about commingling of funds.

Yeah, that could happen to anybody.

Must take a lot of money to get one of these groups up and running.

How much did you have invested in Klepto?

Now, that was a bad investment.

He left my label.

Why you asking?

I'm just fascinated by the music business.

One last thing.

Young fellow, goes by the name of K-Ro.

Did some songs for H2O.

Happen to know his real name or where I can find him?

I'd like to ask him a few questions.

K-Ro... Uh, no, I don't...

I don't even know the guy's real name.

I mean, most of these kids have some badass names.

They all think they're thugs.

For most of them, it's just an act.

Bunch of mama's boys.

One minute they want to be down with a brother, the next minute, they want to be some ungrateful asses.

Half of 'em would be dead or in prison if it wasn't for me.

You know what I'm saying, detective?

It's just a game. Nothing but a game.

Well, we got four mama's boys laying on slabs at the morgue.

It wasn't a game last night.

I'll let you go. Thanks for your help.

If you think of anything more, you let me know, okay?

Sure.

Detective...

Yeah?

What, are you trying to sell me some real estate?

♪♪♪ What do you got?

I know Sartain's lying to me.

How do you know that?

His lips are moving. What do you got there?

A script from the guys in there.

They said they'll let me know if they come across anything.

They say they don't know anything about last night.

They're lying too.

Did you get the name of that producer that's trying to sell his house?

Oh, shit.

I'll get it now. Just a second.

[PHONE DIALING]

Mimi? Mona, right.

Sorry. Do you know the name of that producer selling his place up on...

Yeah. Thank you.

Yeah, sorry.

Bye.

Jerry Duran?

Jerry Duran? Used to be huge.

[TIRES SQUEALING]

Joe, somebody's stealing your car.

Yeah, but look, it's insured, so it's okay.

No, it's not okay.

Hey. Get out of the way! Get out of the way!

Out of the way!

Stop! Police!

Stop!

[HORN HONKS]

All right.

[RICOCHET]

Whoa!

Get out of the car! Get your hands up!

Stop! Stop! Stop! Get down! Get down!

Down on the ground!

Get your hands where I can see them, guys.

Behind your back.

Don't cuff us, dude.

We weren't stealing your car, man.

We're repo guys.

You kidding me?

Nice shot, slick.

Now we got to spend the afternoon booking car thieves? Filling out paperwork?

They weren't stealing it, Joe.

What do you call it?

Repo.

Apparently, you're behind on your payments.

[LAUGHS]

You assholes. Get out of here.

Get out of here, goddamn it! Get out!

Shit. That was a good tire.

Hey, Roy.

Joe Gavilan just left.

Yeah, he was in here looking for K-Ro.

He must've been the other guy backstage.

'Toine, listen to me. It's taken care of.

It's not taken care of.

If it was taken care of, Gavilan wouldn't be here in my face.

After tonight, K-Ro's just a memory.

Not after tonight. Take care of it.

Take care of it now.

By the time Homicide finds him...

Get it taken care of. Now.

♪♪♪ K. C!

Kimberly!

Shawna.

You dog, you.

Yes?

L.A.P.D. Mr. Duran, please.

One moment, please.

You just shut up and let me do the talking, all right?

Gentlemen?

Mr. Duran, Hollywood Homicide.

Detective Joe Gavilan. My partner, K.C. Calden.

There must be some mistake.

I think I've got a buyer for your house.

I won't go a penny under 5.7.

I was thinking closer to 6.

So that's what, five bedrooms?

Six bedrooms upstairs, six baths.

Guest house has two baths, two bedrooms.

And the servants' quarters, two bedrooms, two baths.

Now, this room's a beaut.

You got a whole view of Benedict Canyon. It's...

Hey, don't you have something to do in the kitchen?

There's a lost wax fountain down at the bottom of this.

It's a piece of work. You should see that, and this is our living room.

Mr. Duran, are you still making music and movies?

When I can, kid.

Well, uh... what are you doing on Friday night?

Friday night's a long time away, kid.

Beautiful house, Mr. Duran.

Thank you.

I've got a desperate buyer.

Give me a three-day exclusive listing on the house.

If I don't sell it in that time, deal's off.

I'll give you 48 hours.

The great... and the near-great.

I used to be huge. I could be huge again.

You're still huge to me, Mr. Duran.

You got 72 hours to sell my house.

Thank you.

Let me show you the door.

Joe Gavilan. Look, I found you your big house with class, but you got to get over here right away.

There's a lot of interest.

Man, what's up with you, man?

I got $6 million.

You been talking about a house. Show me the house.

3500 Shadow Hills Way, Beverly Hills.

How soon...

Within an hour? Okay, great.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Gavilan. Yeah, Leon?

Mando's got something for you. Hold on.

Yeah, Joe. The kid who split the club...

K-Ro, born Oliver Robidoux, 5/78.

Went to Leuzinger High in Compton.

Graduated '95.

Address unknown.

Oliver Robidoux...

I hope they do haul you in and turn the fire hose on you.

Leon, that name ring a bell?

Robidoux, Robidoux... That sounds familiar.

Yeah, a Motown singer.

Olivia Robidoux.

Used to sing backup for Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell.

Stella!

Put Lopez back on.

Run Olivia Robidoux, will you?

Music, unions, ASCAP, anything.

Get back to me, all right?

I hope they do haul you in... K-Ro... and turn the firehose on you...

Hey.

You stinker, you whelp of a Polack, you.

K-Ro is one Oliver Robidoux.

I think his mom was this backup singer for Motown named Olivia Robidoux. We're finally getting somewhere.

All right, let's go. Hey, uh...

Look, I've got to... I've got to show the house.

Now?

How about you cover the autopsies for us?

Joe... I don't like dead bodies.

Come on, I'll owe you one.

You coming to my play on Friday night?

Uh, yeah, I'm coming to your play. Sure.

Well, there's still some seats open.

All right, I'll bring some people, okay?

All right, you got a deal.

Hey, Shawna, can I get a lift?

Of course.

Cool. See you, Joe.

Let me take that for you. Thanks.

It's good to see you again.

Man...

[HUMMING]

Jesus! Sorry about that.

There's towels over there, K.C.

We got a juicy one here.

[SAW BUZZES]

K.C. Calden, Hollywood Homicide.

Willie Palmero, South Bureau. Body drop in Vernon.

Couple of crispy critters here, eh?

I think it was a professional hit, a straight-up execution.

And this earring?

Off one of the guys.

I bet they were wearing work boots, weren't they?

Sizes 9 and 11?

How did you know?

Jesus Christ.

Willie, I think these guys shot those guys.

Beautiful home, huh? Cool crib.

This is me.

The great... near-great used to hang out here.

For sure?

Yeah.

Wow.

He wants seven.

Man, tell him kiss my ass.

No, now, wait. Here's the deal.

You offer 5.5. He counters with 6.5.

You come back at 6.

Give him 48 hours. He'll take it.

He's desperate. [CELL PHONE RINGS]

For sure?

For sure. Excuse me.

Gavilan.

K. C: Joe, yeah. I got two bodies down here in the chop shop that could be the triggermen.

What do you got?

I got the earring and I got the boots, and I booked them into evidence.

Man, what's up?

Police business. You seen the library?

I don't need no library.

I need a pool.

Turf warfare.

Guys do their own dirty work.

I think these guys were capped to cover somebody else's tracks.

You like tennis?

Too much running.

I absolutely agree with you.

No, not... uh, look, good job, kid.

I'll talk to you later.

Yeah. Okay.

[SAW BUZZES]

So, Julius... what do you think?

Okay. I'll go 5.5.

All right. My man.

Bring the left foot back.

Root it there, and come up into Warrior 1.

Let your arms just raise up.

Spread your arms to the sides.

Exhale. Come back down into Warrior 2.

Exhale and then bring your right arm down to your knee and sweep the left arm across.

Extreme right-angle pose.

Sweep the arms up, move your feet to parallel.

Pull your arms back around behind you...

then just feel yourself open.

Very good.

And continue that on the other side.

I'll be right back.

What are you doing here?

I got something for you.

How did you find me?

I'm psychic.

Really?

No, not really. I'm a detective, for chrissake.

I didn't know you taught this stuff.

You make some dough?

Yeah, I make 20 bucks a head. Donation.

Donation? Unreportable?

$20 times 40... 800 bucks a whack?

Cash?

Class...

All right, when you're done with this pose, we're done for the day.

Namaste.

Get back here.

Namaste?

Some racket you've got here.

Money and sex...

This is not a racket, all right?

These are real people with real feelings.

All right? They need me. I'm their teacher.

And I need them too.

It's what's called a symbiotic relationship.

You probably wouldn't know about that.

You have a good day. Thank you. Nice practice.

Excuse me, K.C.

Do you give private lessons?

I don't, but I could. If you talk to Kimberly, then we'll set something up.

Okay, thank you.

K.C., thank you. I feel really... open.

That's a good thing. Okay? See you later.

Great class.

Thanks, Shawna.

Okay. Maybe I got into it for the sex, but it's not about that anymore.

I mean, this spiritual shit... there's really something to it.

I mean, I'm out of my body sometimes, man.

Seriously.

I mean, this stuff really works, and then these girls come in, and, I mean, they're everywhere.

Oh. Oh, it's spiritual.

Deep...

And shallow.

Deep and shallow.

This is why I came.

It's the report on your dad's shooting.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Gavilan.

Gower and Franklin.

Thanks for understanding, Joe.

What's up, Cleo?

Have you talked to Vice?

No, I haven't talked to Vice.

Not going to talk to Vice until I talk to your girl.

You're going to have to give me a name.

My girl is ready to talk.

I've heard that before.

She says she was working a Sartain Records party, overheard some guys smoking crack, started bragging.

About what?

Evidently, the people behind the Klepto murder were the same ones behind H2OKlick.

That's hearsay.

Hearsay to you. Pillow talk to the D.A.

You want to deal?

I don't know. Give me a call tomorrow.

I'll run it by the D.A.

This girl better be for real.

Look, I got to make this work. Things are getting ugly.

I hear you.

What we got on Gavilan so far...

First of all, he's still seeing Cleo Ricard.

In fact, he saw her earlier today.

God, he does this right in my face.

He's just completely defiant.

Yeah, well, he's clearly continuing to work her as an informant.

Yeah, I know.

That's enough to relieve him of duty right there, but, you know, I don't want him relieved of duty.

I want him to hang.

Well, his financials don't add up.

He's paying off three ex-wives.

He's got two kids.

He's got two kids in a fancy college.

He's got a great big house.

He's got that big stupid car, you know?

I mean... What about his real estate thing?

He hasn't made a sale in ages.

Well, my source tells me he's getting money from somewhere to keep it afloat, so get me more surveillance.

Okay.

Alrighty.

[WATER SPLASHES]


Dominique?

Close enough.

♪ Love me right ♪

♪ What's the matter with you? ♪

♪ Hold me tight ♪♪

[SNORES]

[THUMPING]

[DOOR CREAKS OPEN]

Where did you get the key?

Under the flowerpot.

[CLICKS ON STEREO]

How did you know it was under the flowerpot?

I'm psychic. Good security for a cop.

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ Every day There's something new ♪

♪ Oh, baby ♪

♪ Honey To keep me loving you ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh, honey ♪

♪ And with every Passing minute ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Oh, baby ♪

♪ So much joy wrapped up in it ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Heaven must have sent you From above ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Heaven must have sent Your precious love ♪

♪ Oh ♪ Bad cop. No donut.

♪ I've got a song to sing ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Tellin' the world About the joy you bring ♪

♪ Sweetheart ♪

♪ And you gave me A reason for livin' ♪

♪ And ooh, you taught me ♪

♪ You taught me the meanin' of givin' ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Heaven must have sent you From above ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Heaven must have sent Your precious love ♪♪

Everything okay?

Oh yeah.

Everything's fine.

Just a tough case, that's all.

Used to have a feel for a case early on.

Thank you.

So, you really think you can predict the future, huh?

Mm-hmm.

How's that work?

Sometimes... I see things.

It just comes to me... and sometimes I flip a coin.

Other times...

I just make shit up.

Happy anniversary.

What anniversary?

You and me. Three weeks.

That is so sweet. You remembered.

I didn't.

I mean, dates don't really matter, except they do.

We think human time, but rocks think geologic time.

Do you understand what I'm saying?

I don't.

The only date that matters is the day I found you and left that jerk.

Does he know it's over?

Bennie's in denial. He's hanging on like a mongoose.

It's sad, really.

Bennie?

Macko.

You don't know him. He's not in your division.

Bennie Macko?

Bennie "The Executioner" Macko?

That sounds like my Bennie.

He's the guy who's trying to bury me, for chrissake.

Does he know about us?

Of course not... and who cares?

It's over. We're finished.

Guys aren't like that, honey.

Guys keep score.

[PHONE RINGS]

Gavilan.

Yeah, Jerry... Mr. Duran.

Yeah, I can do that.

Okay.

Got the buyer and the seller inches away from closing, and this guy wants... breakfast.

But that could be great, honey.

Mercury's not in retrograde for another week.

It's good time for deal-making. It's perfect time.

What did you ever see in Bennie Macko?

I guess I just have a weakness for cops.

Lock up when you leave.

Whoa... What have we here?

Oh, my...

Nice shoes.

Good morning, Mr. Duran. Julius.

Have a seat.

This is my attorney, Marty Wheeler, who just happens to be Julius' attorney as well.

Small world.

Is that a conflict of interest?

Not for me.

Okay, let's talk.

Julius was ready to go to 6.3 or 6.4, and you drove the price down to six.

Wait a second, you wanted 5.8.

Six is a score.

You never told me 5.8 would do it.

I was negotiating. For whom?

Look, you wanted 5.8.

I was about to get you six.

He was ready to go to 6.4.

Maybe 6.5, but you said the price was 7, and it never was 7.

Now, look, guys, calm down.

This is a good deal for both of you.

The deal's off. I want 7 million.

Seven?

Yeah.

I won't go a penny over 6.5.

Good day, gents.

Asshole.

I was that close to closing the deal when Jerry Duran starts dicking around and blows the whole thing.

Calm down, Joe.

Getting excited never solved any problems.

What do you know about problems?

How many girls are waiting for you in the hot tub, that's your idea of a problem.

Joe, you don't respect me wanting to be an actor, do you?

I just don't get it.

I mean, don't you ever just want to explore all the possibilities of who you are?

I just want to pay the mortgage and escape with my dick still attached to my body.

It's that one over there. I'm a simple man.

Why don't you go around behind?

I'll give you a second.

Okay.

I'll take the front.

[KNOCKING]

Ms. Robidoux? Police.

[KNOCKING]

Just want to ask you a few questions.

I always thought you could sing much better than Tammi Terrell.

She got the breaks. I didn't. That's life.

Mind if I come in?

Joe, he's around front! Joe, he's coming around front!

I got him!

He didn't do anything!

Ms. Robidoux...

♪♪♪ Hey!

I ain't dished it, cop!

Why you comin' to my mama's house?

I ain't been to your mama's house!

Fuck!

Jesus Christ, man. Get out of the water.

Wait.

Don't make me come in there after you.

I'm knee-deep in duck shit.

There's two feet of duck shit, cop.

That's fine. Hey, get out of the water, man.

What you going to do, shoot me?

Huh?

He wants to shoot an unarmed nigger.

Get out, man. You're under arrest.

I didn't do nothing.

Get out of the water!

♪♪♪ Hey!

Too slow, cop!

Hey!

Christ!

Why are you laughing?

Kick away. I'm going to catch you.

Never going to catch me, cop!

Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.

♪ I've got sunshine On a cloudy day ♪

Stay right! Sorry! Your right!

Your right, your right.

All right.

Police brutality!

Get down!

Don't swear at your mom. It's not nice!

Damn it.

Settle down.

You see where that got you?

I didn't do nothing!

You're still caught, and you got duck shit all over you!

How do you like that, huh?

Center yourself.

I'm calm, okay?

I'm calm! All right, all right.

Get up. Get up.

K-RO: You young-ass brat.

If it wasn't for this old man up here, you wouldn't have caught nothing... nothing, even if you had roller skates.

I can't believe I let your old ass catch me.

JOE: Talk to us.

L.A.P.D.

Lame-Ass Punk-ass Dickheads.

Settle down, son.

L.A.P. D...

Settle down.

I ain't no snitch, and I ain't no bitch.

I ain't got to tell you shit.

You are just talking yourself into a hole.

Take my cuffs off and I'll kick your ass!

Will you shut up?

Shut up!

I ain't did shit, man.

All right! That's it! That's it!

Let's take this sucker to the station, partner, huh?

Harbor Division Substation.

K-RO: Crooked-ass police.

I'm going to call Johnnie Cochran, Chemical Ali, Robert Shapiro, one of them... where do I call my mama?

It's gonna be a rap, man.

What is this, man?

JOE: This is Harbor Division, son.

Nice quiet place. We can reason together.

Here we are.

Harbor Division.

This don't look like no police station.

Get him out of the car.

My pleasure.

Get him out. Come on.

This don't look like...

Get out of the car.

This ain't no police station.

Yeah, this is a special station for a special asshole.

Police station, my ass!

[AUTOMATIC GUNFIRE]

Hey! Not again.

Bastard! Come back here.

Come on.

You okay?

Yeah, I'm okay. You?

Okay.

Any opportunity, right? Come here.

Somebody doesn't like you.

You're no fun to be around.

You all right?

Somebody wants you dead.

He okay? Yeah, he's okay.

He just pissed his pants.

I want to talk to my mama.

You're the man.

You got nothing on my boy.

Respectfully, ma'am, we've got a puddle of piss at the crime scene, and your son has a weak bladder.

And what does that mean?

That means we take your son down to the station.

We ask him some questions about what he saw.

He answers, we book him into custody.

He lives.

He doesn't, we let him go.

He dies.

He didn't do it, and he ain't getting involved.

All right, uncuff him.

Let the jackals hunt him down.

You know what I'm talking about...

Hey, hey, stop, stop.

Stop. Shh.

The young men that got shot all were rappers since they were little boys on the street corner, and they all wanted to be with Antoine Sartain and Sartain Records.

That was their Motown.

I don't get the music.

You ain't supposed to.

After a few albums, they want to go out on their own, and they find out the record producer's keeping all the money, the way it's always going to be in the music business.

Sartain goes to the joint for a while.

Klepto, the first to rebel, tells Sartain, "I'm going to hire a lawyer to get out of my contract I signed in high school."

Sartain get out of jail.

You know what happened next.

You telling me Antoine Sartain had his own groups killed because they wanted to go off on their own?

Makes a powerful statement to anybody thinking about breaking a contract... don't it?

I told you what the picture looks like.

You have to put the pieces together your own self.

We'll take care of your son for you, ma'am.

Antoine Sartain?

He was a busy guy in the gangster network.

Had a lot of contacts on the outside.

The music guy, right?

Big time.

Yeah, he was smooth, but he was a psycho.

And the guy, he was wired.

He had this attitude, like, he could get anything he wanted.

Any... contacts, friends, something we can follow up on?

There was a white dude.

He came to visit him every single week.

Every week for a whole year, without fail.

Got a name?

Yeah... Hey, Meyers, what was the name of the white dude?

He came to visit Sartain every week.

[COMPUTER BEEPS]

Wasley.

Leroy Wasley.

Leroy Wasley?

"Officer Calden and his partner, "Officer Leroy Wasley, "working undercover cocaine buy.

"A standoff developed.

"The suspect demanded to see the cash.

"Officer Calden demanded to see the cocaine.

"Officer Calden was shot twice in the chest.

"Suspect got away with $100,000.

"Some suspicion that Officer Wasley may be involved with the drug dealers."

If the Feds thought that Wasley was dirty, why would they let him back up my dad on a $100,000 drug deal?

Because they couldn't prove it, I guess.

"After an exhaustive four-month investigation, "the case against Officer Wasley was dropped due to a lack of evidence."

Joe, I want to kill him.

Easy. Easy.

There's a real can of worms here.

Wasley wasn't the only backup.

"There were three uniformed officers

"out in the alley.

"Two of them took off after the suspect.

"One of them... came into the room to find out..."

Oh, my God.

Look at this name.

Bernard Macko.

Bennie Macko?

Bennie Macko.

Wasley and Macko. Macko and Wasley.

Something's going on here.

Oh, God. I've got to be somewhere.

You okay?

Yeah, I'm good. Go. Go ahead.

Take it easy.

JOE: Hey, Rubes.

Look, I.A.'s on my ass.

Grab some takeout and meet me up at Mt. Olympus.

I don't want to go to the house, okay?

♪ Lights, camera, action Showtime ♪

♪ We work Back in no time ♪

♪ Yo hurt can't With my kind ♪

♪ You must be Losing your mind ♪♪

[GUNSHOTS]

♪♪♪ Rube?

Ruby, where are you?

Rube?

Oh, dear.

Detective, you found me.

You're under arrest, young lady.

Please don't put the cuffs on me.

You have the right to remain silent.

Do you understand?

That's Gavilan with Marty Wheeler, attorney for the music business, gambling industry.

Sleazeball. You know him.

Here's Gavilan drinking on duty.

We've got photos, date, time stamped.

Yeah, okay, this is not criminal.

I need criminal shit.

Well, boss, this may not be criminal shit, but, um...

What is this?

Nice house.

You think so?

That's Gavilan's house.

That's his front porch...

It's a classic whose time hasn't come.

And her car was there all night.

Where is he now?

We lost him.

Where's she?

This is a very romantic idea.

You're a stud.

No. My partner's a stud, but I've got a few... veteran moves.

If I take my ginkgo, I can still remember where I put the Viagra.

You really like this house?

I'll offer you 675, and not a penny more.

Collateral?

You're looking at it.

[KNOCKING]

Sergeant Gavilan, we're taking you downtown.

[YAWNS] What a night.

Just one question, asshole. Why me?

You got no probable cause.

I'm a good cop.

Yeah.

You have the right to remain silent...

Here we go...

You have the right to have an attorney present during questioning.

Do you understand the rights I've just explained to you?

Yes, I do understand the rights you've just explained to me, but you know what?

I'm not going to remain silent, and I do not need an attorney, because this is all bullshit, and you can put that on the record!

There is absolutely no need to take your tie off during questioning, Mr. Calden.

Why's he taking his shoes off?

I've got questions for you to answer.

You've got questions for me to answer?

I got questions for you to answer.

My first question is how does a lightweight needle-dick pencil-pusher like you get assigned to I. A?

Oh, he's up on the table.

What is he doing?

He's on the table.

This conversation's being recorded.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

This will reflect very badly on you...

Gavilan.

What, he's got a phone?

Jerry? Slow down, Jerry.

Excuse me.

I'm busy here.

Ommm...

Okay, he's omm-ing.

There are some discrepancies with your income and spending.

You mean I'm spending more than I'm making?

Is that news?

Keep talking.

I think he's centering. He's finding his center.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Gavilan.

What is this?

Julius. Calm down, Julius.

It's not over. Julius, it's never over.

Get him off the phone.

Guys?

[CELL PHONE RINGS] Gavilan.

Cleo?

Police business.

Joe?

I can't talk to you.

I'll call you back later, all right?

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Gavilan.

Hey, Ruby.

[LAUGHING]

What is going on?

The muscles, man. I mean, that's...

Make him talk!

I have got the most intense compression of the L4 and L5.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

We have allegations of commingling of funds.

I've been told that some yoga and some massage is really...

Oh, yoga, yoga, yoga. That's great.

You can't hold out for seven. Jerry, seven...

Okay, that's great.

I think that's enough. I'm sorry.

We're that close, Jerry. Jerry?

That looks really hard.

His position.

His position looks really hard...

He's not even... he's not even talking, is he?

To do.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

A tree?

Now he's a tree?

This is a setup, and it will not hold up.

I'm sure Joe Gavilan is next door right now, maintaining complete professional integrity.

And you know it!

What the hell is going on?

Did you say anything in there?

Of course not. You?

My phone wouldn't stop ringing.

Yo, K. C!

This is insane. Can you figure this out?

No, but I played my last card buying you a couple hours, so you can figure it out.

What did you want to talk to me about?

I like you, Joe.

Don't bullshit me.

You didn't talk to Vice, so I made a deal with them.

What are you talking about?

They agreed to back off if I agreed to testify.

Testify against whom?

You.

I was approached by Lieutenant Macko.

Said he heard that you and I were involved sexually, and maybe you and some of my girls had, you know, relationships.

The kid too.

Look, I don't know what you did to piss this Macko guy off, but he cut me a deal, and I took it.

And you're telling me this because you like me, huh?

Yeah, Joe. I thought you should know.

Bitch!

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Gavilan.

Joe, listen, Bennie's going to the D.A. Right now, not even waiting until the morning, and the stakeout at Sartain's house says he hasn't been seen in 24 hours, and he hasn't been at Sartain Records either.

All right, thanks.

What?

This guy, Sartain.

I don't even know where to find him.

Wait a second. I got one idea.

Hey, Rube, you ever done any psychic work for the police?

You going to be home for the next half hour?

Great.

What are you laughing at?

[HUMS]

It's going to work.

This is ridiculous.

Joe, be quiet, please.

What are you doing?

I'm getting centered, and if you don't leave me alone...

Joe, leave her alone for a second.

Flip a coin, make some shit up.

I don't care.

Sorry.

Continue, please.

[HUMS]

There's a house on Sunset Plaza...

Yes?

But nobody's there.

We must move quickly.

Move quickly.

Turn right.

Right?

I see Rodeo Drive.

What happened to Sunset Plaza?

Give her a break, Joe.

We're getting close.

Hold on, hold on.

We're here.

Here? Here, yeah.

Here? Okay.

Here.

Thank you. Thank you.

In here.

You sure?

Shut up.

Welcome to Beverly Hills.

I am not in the mood.

That would look so great on me.

Ruby... How nice to see you.

I love that. How much is it?

Don't worry.

That is cute.

You like that?

She's shopping.

Let her shop.

We have it in black and purple as well.

I'm out of here.

Goddamn it, Joe.

Do you have that in size 2?

Yes, we do.

This is ridiculous.

You've got to give her some space, man.

We got nothing else to go on.

Sartain! Right there!

In the black S.U. V! Get the car! Go!

Hey! [HONKS]

Move it!

Do you have the keys? Yeah, they're in there.

Hey! Hey!

Come on!

Hey, stop!

Stop, damn it!

You owe me $10.

I'll get it to you later.

Hey, stop!

Stop, goddamn it!

Go! Go!

I'm going!

WASLEY: Don't speed.

You're in Beverly Hills.

Goddamn it, I don't want a ticket.

There he is.

Jesus, don't do this. Out of the way!

Out of the way!

Get out of the way!

That's him, Danny.

Right here. Turn.

Out of the car. Easy, boss.

Get out of the car.

I quit!

Damn it.

Joe, you all right?

Son of a bitch. Come on.

Go! Go!

♪♪♪ Stay with him.

I am not going back to prison on this bullshit!

Get out of the way!

Jesus Christ! Stop!

Policia! Apurate! Police!

Move the truck! Get out of the way!

Move it!

Jesus Christ, if it's not one thing, it's another.

This is Gavilan in pursuit of possible 187 suspects.

Black Escalade, eastbound on Sunset.

REPORTER: Flying over the Hollywood Freeway, all of a sudden we hear about this chase on the eastbound side of Sunset Boulevard.

If you're driving anywhere in the Hollywood area, heading to Mid-Wilshire and Beverly Hills, I suggest you stay away.

The police need you to stay out of the area.

[SIRENS BLARE]

Get out. Watch!

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Gavilan.

Are you okay?

Yeah, honey. We had to go.

The guy showed up right across the street.

There really is something...

I know.

Look, I got to go. I'll talk to you soon.

Take care.

MAN: We've got two more black and whites joined up on the chase in pursuit of a silver Mustang convertible, black Escalade, Sunset Boulevard, doing about 50 miles an hour.

Those black and whites chasing me or them?

Both of us now.

Goddamn, you just committed three felonies... twice!

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Gavilan. Yeah, Jerry. No, I can talk.

You'll take 6.9 now?

I don't know. It might be too late.

I'll make a call.

Go, go, go!

Cut over! Get out of the way!

Watch it! Sorry.

Let me know when you're back on the street.

All right, it's almost over, don't worry.

Be advised, we're getting crowded up here.

We've got a lot of news choppers in the sky.

The air babes are up here.

It is not just crazy in the streets.

It is crazy up in the air right there.

We have one, two, three... I see Vera, Jennifer York...

I see Lauren, Vera over there...

[SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

You get a deal on that house yet?

They're dicking me around, but I'm working on it.

Watch it! Watch it!

I'm watching!

Julius, he says he'll take 6.9 now.

That's what he says.

Let me make a call. Bye.

Get off Sunset! Go! Go!

I got them.

Is that Joe Gavilan?

Looks like they're going to try to travel right up towards Hollywood Boulevard, where we've got a huge crowd right in front of Grauman's Chinese Theater.

I don't know what's going on there, but this is a very, very dangerous situation.

...and we're going to honor him in one of the most famous traditions here in Hollywood...

Watch it, watch it, watch!

Goddamn it! Idiot!

That's it! That's it! I'm driving!

All right, all right.

You think you can do better?

Go ahead. Be my guest.

Damn it! You're trying to kill me!

All right! Go!

Trying to kill me.

Go ahead.

This is a tradition that started back in 1927... when a little dog named Zorro...

Oh, yeah, this is much better. Thank you.

Jumped out of Mary Pickford's car... into wet cement.

Nice driving.

S-sorry.

The Mustang was just hit by the Escalade, and this chase came to a screeching halt right in front of Grauman's Chinese Theater, where apparently, someone was getting their star.

[GUNFIRE]

Go! Go!

I got Wasley!

Get out of the way!

Go! Get out of the way!

Police! Police! Stay down!

Mayhem is breaking out in front of Grauman's Chinese Theater, resulting in a foot pursuit down Hollywood Boulevard.

They've got their weapons drawn.

Shots have been fired.

People are scrambling, trying to get out of the way.

Everyone is just running around down there.

It's a mess.

Excuse me. Sorry. Excuse me.

Look out down there!

Holy shit!

Oh, God...

That was not the way I planned it.

I'm a cop. Help me up.

Thank you.

Whoa. I'm okay. I'm all right. Thank you.

Hey, move, move.

Move!

Hey! Get out of the way! Police!

Get out!

Stop!

Shit.

Hey! Police. Get out of your car.

What the hell?

I need your car. I'm sorry.

I'll get it back to you.

My family's in there.

I've been robbed! Police! Somebody help me!

Get out of the way! Watch out! Police!

Police!


Don't worry, kids.

You need to slow down.

I can't slow down. I'm chasing this guy.

It's kind of fun, huh?

No, it's not!

We're going to die.

I know we're going to die.

Yes, actually, we will die.

No, you're not going to die.

I don't mean right now.

Hey, get out of the car! Police! Police! Get out!

Hey, look...

Get out of here.

That's mine!

Give me that!

Bitch!

Asshole!

Move! Police! Move!

Move, move, move!

Goddamn it!

You all right?

Watch out!

Move! Move! Move!

Hey, kids, Hindus say that life is a rebirth.

Ganesh had his head chopped off by his father.

They put an elephant's head on and he was immortal.

You're crazy!

It's not a bad thing if we do die, all right?

Get out of the cab!

It's my cab!

My cab!

No, man, it's my cab.

It's my cab!

Get in the car!

Police! Police!

I am the police!

For chrissake, get in the cab!

Move! Move!

If you wreck my cab...

Don't worry. Sit back. I'm a very good driver.

KIDS: I don't want to die!

We're not going to die, all right?

My God, you're crazy!

Shut up, okay? Please!

Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

Wait a minute, man. Where's my fare?

How much?

$10.

$10... $10. There's a tip.

[FAREBOX BEEPS]


[GUNFIRE]

♪♪♪ Hey, hey!

Whoa.

Hey, hey, cop! What about 6.75?

I don't think that'll do it.

Not a penny more!

Get down! Get down! Get the hell down!

Get up. Get in front of the door.

Get in front of the frickin' door!

Come on, come on, come on. What are you doing?

[DIALING]

Uh, Jerry?

I've just been with Julius, I've twisted his arm, I have a firm offer for 6.75. 6.75.

Yes, sir, 6.75. Firm.

I... You will? You will?

Oh, God.

You will? Oh, that's fantastic.

I'll, uh... I'll have the paperwork started first thing in the morning, as soon as I get to the office, okay?

Well, I've got to run now. Thank you very much.

I'm a real estate broker.

Hey.

[WOMEN YELP]

[GUNFIRE]

Uh, yeah, he needs a pop-out trailer, cook, driver, trainer with a gym that travels, dog walker, hair and makeup guys.

I'll fax you the rest of the perks.


Don't shoot me.

Don't shoot?

Don't shoot me. Don't shoot, Wasley.

Please don't shoot me. "Please"?

Are you shitting me? "Please"? You're not going to beg.

I'm begging you, man. Please don't...

H2O didn't beg. They screamed and hollered.

They didn't beg.

Fat-ass Klepto ran a couple of yards.

You can run.

I don't even want to be a cop anymore.

I want to quit, and I won't tell anybody about this, I swear to God.

Just please don't shoot me.

I don't want to die, okay? My father was your partner.

Just please, God, just don't shoot me, okay? Please.

Shut up. Don't you talk about your father.

Your daddy didn't beg when he got shot.

He was a good cop.

Please... just don't shoot me.

Don't do it!

Don't do it, Wasley.

Don't.

That was a great performance.

That was probably good enough to be at least a Golden Globe.

I don't know about an Academy Award, but definitely a Golden Globe.

I believed it myself.

I mean, all the, you know, "Don't kill me, man.

Don't freaking kill me."

I mean, I especially liked that part where you talked about killing my father...

but it's okay, because I got it all right here.

See that?

Your confession and my performance, all on one tape.

That will sell great.

Air Six, suspects are now on the rooftop of the old Broadway Building.

Shots have been fired.


Air Six, Air Six, get on the horn and get these news choppers out of here, now.

I can't work in here. I need orbit room.

You've got to move them back...

He's telling us to get out of their way.

[SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

But we are not moving.

We are not moving.

The L.A.P.D.'s trying to kick us out of here.

We still don't know who the good guy is, who the bad guy is.

I've never seen such drama in Hollywood before.

♪♪♪ Air Six, we're on the roof.

♪♪♪

[SCREAMS]


Where is he?

You want me to get him out, Joe?

No, leave him for the coroner.

Where's the kid?

Down that way.

You okay?

Yeah. You?

Don't I look okay?

Where's Sartain?

[WHISTLES]

And Wasley?

Good job.

Good thing you didn't kill him.

Ah, you know me, Joe.

I don't like dead bodies.

I got arrest warrants for Gavilan and Calden right here.

Hey, separate them.

I don't want them talking to anybody.

Nobody talks to them until they get downtown.

Shut up and turn around, Bennie.

What?

Cuff his ass and take him downtown.

What are you talking about?

Get your hands off me, son of a bitch.

You're making a big mistake, pal.

You can kiss your career goodbye.

Good.

Call my lawyer.

[SIRENS CHIRP]

Great job.

You know, you don't have to come tomorrow night if you're not feeling up to it.

I said I would be there tomorrow night.

I'll be there, all right?

All right.

Damn it!

Oh, grow up, you animal thing, you!

Will all of you please just get out of here?

If you lay one hand on me, I'll...

My sister's having a baby.

Let go of me, you sons of bitches!

We should get him in the bed, put a cold towel on his head.

I think some coffee would do him very good right now.

Let's get him into the shower.

Let go of me, you sons of bitches!

Take it easy. Come on.

[WATER SQUIRTING]

Aah!

Poker should not be played in a house with women!

Baby!

Eunice, I want my baby girl down here.

Eunice, I'm just going to keep on calling if you...

Stella!

Quit that howling out there and go back to bed!

Eunice, send my baby girl down here!

She ain't coming down 'til you quit, or I'm going to set the law on you.

Stella, come down here, baby.

You can't beat up on a girl and expect her to come back.

You suck.

Sit down.

Have some respect, or I'll kick your ass.

Stella, come down here, baby.

Eunice, send my baby girl down here.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

It's Calden.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Gavilan.

Yeah, I'll be there in 15.

West of Coldwater, huh?

I can be there in 10.

Stella!

Oh, baby, don't ever leave me again.

♪♪♪

♪ I've got sunshine On a cloudy day... ♪ Hey, officer, help me out.

Yeah.

What's going on?

Looks like you got a 187 and a possible 927D.

Thanks a lot.

You bet.

He says we have a body and a half with some pieces missing.

Ooh, an Easter Egg hunt.

You know, you were pretty good in that play.

You really were.

You think so?

Yeah. Yeah.

I don't know if I'm much of an actor, Joe.

Maybe I'm just a cop.

What do you mean, just a cop?

You really thought I was good?

Hey, I already said you were good.

Don't go begging me.

Looks like we're going to be here for a while.

Let's get going on some chow, huh?

Cheeseburger, well done, onion, pickle, no mayo.

No rabbit food, okay?

I'll have the same.

♪ I guess you'd say ♪

♪ What can make me feel this way? ♪

♪ My girl ♪ ♪ My girl ♪

♪ My girl ♪

♪ Talkin' 'bout my girl ♪

♪ My girl ♪

♪ Ooh hoo ♪♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Aw, hey ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Y-A riders ♪

♪ Don't get no better From the women to the weather ♪

♪ Californ-I-A, Y-A Where every day is Friday ♪

♪ They call me young Roscoe The Philly Fanatic ♪

♪ I give the people What they want ♪

♪ Keep the party crankin' ♪

♪ Get all the homeys in the club Tryin' to make it happen ♪

♪ And all the ladies want To creep at least one time ♪

♪ To see if it's true ♪

♪ What all the homegirls Be sayin' about my bloodline ♪

♪ And it ain't nothin' Like a sunny summer day ♪

♪ In the city of L.A. Livin' busy gettin' paid ♪

♪ That's how we do it In the West ♪

♪ We sip and we spit it Like fluid in the West ♪

♪ And I can make you love it If you don't ♪

♪ Bump it if you won't ♪

♪ Nothin' like bomb music From the West ♪

♪ Layin' under palm trees ♪

♪ Wit' lil' mamas Feelin' the breeze ♪

♪ Now, I don't think I ever wanna leave ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ I love Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ Roll into the club In a 6-4 hoppin' ♪

♪ Pull up and I see It's already poppin' ♪

♪ Tell me what we doin' Barbecuin' ♪

♪ Doin' it under the influence The music got you movin' in it ♪

♪ Nobody on the wall ♪

♪ Nobody still at all It's like a protocol ♪

♪ The way I got 'em all Waxin' their fos up ♪

♪ Ridin' around wit' twenties On their donuts ♪

♪ Pancake wit' enough bass To insinuate earthquakes ♪

♪ While the sun just bakes ♪

♪ Havin' fun Up in the sunny states ♪

♪ Pumpin' the brakes At the yellow light ♪

♪ My seatbelt on tight ♪

♪ Don't need no cops On my tail tonight ♪

♪ And when you go to the club I'm in the back ♪

♪ Party people Tear the club up ♪

♪ And make 'em feel it From L.A. To the Bay ♪

♪ Now, put your dubs up ♪

♪ Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ You know, you got me movin' ♪

♪ Movin', rollin' Dippin', smashin' ♪

♪ Smashin' ♪

♪ I'm goin' to show you how the Gs do, baby, baby ♪

♪ Y-A-Gs do, baby, baby ♪

♪ You know, you got me movin' ♪

♪ Movin', rollin' Dippin', smashin' ♪

♪ Smashin' ♪

♪ Show you how the Gs do it Baby, baby ♪

♪ Y-A-Gs do, baby, baby ♪

♪ G's up ♪

♪ Is Cali in the summer When it really heats up ♪

♪ It gotta be the hood Homey throwin' heats up ♪

♪ And G's up ♪

♪ You got a Benz on frost Put your keys up ♪

♪ Pedals to the floor And ease up ♪

♪ And when the groupies approach You gotta speed up ♪

♪ You might see Roscoe the Young Gaud ♪

♪ In the club sippin' wine ♪

♪ If you don't We can freeze up ♪

♪ We gonna shout Ten zeroes on my contract ♪

♪ I might sign 19 Spittin' hot wax ♪

♪ I got my mind On money, women, and fos ♪

♪ Hot-boxin' the Benz Rollin' the the windows up ♪

♪ Roll wit' tint glow ♪

♪ Homeys roll wit me Ten in the most ♪

♪ When I'm outside or posted up in the G ride ♪

♪ Flaunts it, Lorenzo ♪

♪ But tempo is faster then When you drive so fast ♪

♪ Your rims glow off Off the moonlight ♪

♪ And fear spins slow ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah We do it just like this ♪

♪ Yeah We do it just like this ♪

♪ Y-A ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali ♪

♪ I love Cali In the summertime ♪

♪ Love Cali in the summertime ♪

♪ Don't get no better From the women to the weather ♪

♪ I ain't goin' nowhere You dig? ♪

♪ You know we love it In the summertime ♪♪