Night of the Comet (1984) Script

Since before recorded time it had swung through the universe in an elliptical orbit so large that its very existence remained a secret of time and space.

But now, in the last few years of the 20th century, the visitor was returning.

The citizens of Earth would get an extra Christmas present this year, as their planet orbited through the tail of the comet.

Scientists predicted a light show of stellar proportions, something not seen on Earth for 65 million years.

Indeed, not since the time that the dinosaurs disappeared, virtually overnight.

There were a few who saw this as more than just a coincidence.

But most didn't.

I'm showing you the top of the line here.

This is the best we have. This is $9.50.

$9.50? But wait a minute.

This is $8.00, okay? This is $7.50.

This lady over here, she's wearing the $7.50.

Yeah, I like it. Let me tell you about this thing.

Blow on it there.

See? See how nice that is?

Isn't that great?

I know you got $9.50.

Will it work? Oh, yeah.

I know it will.

This spring, look at it.

Isn't that nice.

And the other side. Look at it.

Isn't that great? $9.50.

Enjoy the movie.

Excuse me, where's the men's room?

One minute. Do you work here or not?

Hey, Regina.

Regina, give that thing a rest, will ya?

In a minute, Mel.

Look, I don't pay you to do that kind of stuff around here.

Regina, I want you to clean everything up so we can get out of here in time to watch the comet.

Everything's cleaned up.


I want you to take this flashlight and walk the house.

Aw, Mel, they throw things at me.

Who cares?

Walk the house.

Have you ever been hit with Dots, Mel?

Milk Duds? Those things hurt.

I-- I don--

Oh, how are you, sir?

The refreshments are right over there.

Thank you. Thank you.

I don't want those weirdos cutting up the seats, you understand?

Okay, okay, okay.

Replacing Reg in third place is Reg, third place.

Wait a minute.

Somebody named DMK in sixth place.

When did this happen?

Look, don't be an overachiever, you'll fit in better with your age group, okay?

This is really annoying.

Regina, Regina, look this way.

Regina! Look at me!

Read my lips.


Walk house now, hm?

Okay, Mel.

Let me take this for you.

Uh, uh, that, that's great, they go to profits.

And listen, stay out of the projection booth.

And stay away from Dupree!

I'm gonna fire that guy some day.

He's been doing to me what he's been doing to her in the booth.

David, that was a scream.

You're right, I'm gonna check it out.

You stay here.

I'm talkin' about a mint condition print of It Came from Outer Space.

In 3D, man.

Yeah, right, Tres Dimensiones.

Look, you know as well as I do, you got film freaks who'd go down on you for a bootleg print of that.

Oh, a hundred bucks?

Hundred bucks, right.

Something wrong with the phone here or did I hear you say a hundred dollars?

Look, a hundred dollars isn't going to get it this time.

Because I'm gonna have to spend the night in here waiting for you to bring the print back.

Think I'm gonna miss this comet thing for a lousy hundred dollars?

Okay, $110's a little better, yeah.

Hey, Reggie, here's the deal.

You leave, I let you in the back door.

Okay, I leave, you let me back in. Mel thinks everybody's gone.

Larry, do you know anybody named DMK?

No, ow!

No, you gotta have the print back by 6:00 in the morning.

You know, if we spend the night in here, we're gonna miss the comet.

It's not like you can't see it on television, you know.

All right, hey, get your guy here in an hour.

Yeah, well, maybe I want to see it for real, okay?

Hey, television's real. Television's very real.

So, what do you say? I'll give you $15.

Are you kidding?

We spend the night in here and we end up making it.

And you give me 15 bucks?

Do you know what that makes me look like?

Reggie, I'm not giving you 15 bucks for making it with me.

Okay, well, just so we have that straight, okay?

Yeah, for sure.

I mean, you'd be worth a lot more than 15 bucks.

Everybody knows that.

The first earthlings to see the effects will be in Newfundland.

Or Newfoundland.

This is expected to begin at-- at 2:04.

That's Pacific Standard Time. Hey, Sammy, Sammy, Sammy.

Uh, interesting, uh, sidebar to this story is the fact that all telecommunications seem to be out in that part of the world.

Uh, this could have--


Samantha, you sound pissed.

I just had it out with Doris once and for all again.

She wants me to like, haul chips and dips around for her little comet party.

Yeah, well, speaking of Doris, look, I need your help.

Tell her that, uh, you know all about this field trip that I'm gonna take, okay, with my science class?

We're gonna go to the observatory to watch the comet.

She won't go for it.

She'll go for it. Just tell her, okay?



Reggie's on the phone.

She's not having car trouble?

She's gonna be out all night with her science class at the observatory.

I know all about it.

We gotta get outta here.

Yeah, hi, Doris.

What's this about a science class, Regina?

Well, you want me to do better in science, don't you?

I want you home in five minutes after you finish work.

If you want to watch the comet, you can do it here.

Look, Doris, like, I'm 18, okay?

And I can watch the comet wherever I want to watch the comet.

Here, Samantha.

You and your sister share a lot of secrets.

I want you to share this one with her.

If it were up to me, I couldn't care less what she did.

But if your father makes it back home without some Sandinista blowing his brains out, he's gonna hold me responsible for any kind of trouble you two girls get into.

What we have here is a chain of command.

The Major jumps on me, I jump on you.

Did you get that?


Now, are you going to join the party?

Join the party for what, Doris?

So I can watch Chuck from across the street stick his hands down your pants?

I think that's something Daddy should know.

Chuck's a nice guy.

He's certainly nice to be with while Daddy's down in Banana Land.

You were born with an asshole, Doris, you don't need Chuck.

Looks like a-- a-- a real nice crowd we have out here tonight.

Sarah, Chucky.

Hey, where have you been? You're gonna miss everything.

It's gonna start. Oh, kids.

I'll never marry another man with kids.

In 1910, Halley's Comet returned.

Everybody thought they were going to die then.

What was that?


You want to know what bugs me about all this?


Well, I'm always afraid someone's gonna see us, you know?

See us how?

There's no windows. They can't see through walls.

Well, Superman can see through walls.

Not these walls, they're made out of steel.

Used to be a fire law.


Superman can see through steel.

Nope, it's the one thing he cannot see through.

That's lead, you nerd.

Lead? Yeah.

I mean, Superman can see through steel like it wasn't there even.



Well, I guess I'm the only one who's not outside watching the meteor shower.

I just might put the radio station on autopilot and sneak out myself.

This is the big K in Los Angeles.

A great looking morning in Southern California.

Fifty thousand watts of coiled steel and passion FM in the AM.

It's wake up time in the city of angels.

And I'm Steve LaBeau.

God damn it!

What? What?

I've been waiting by that door for the last 30 minutes and that pinhead hasn't brought the film back yet!

Oh, give the guy a break.

I mean, people are late sometimes.

No, something's wrong.

If he screwed that film up, we could all be in a lot of trouble.

I'm gonna go over there on the bike.

Aw, jeez, don't I get an Egg McMuffin or anything?

You could do me a favor.

I did you a favor last night.

That guy calls, you tell him I'm on my way over and I'm very, very, very, very pissed!

Hey what about my 15 bucks?

Tell him you're pissed too.


You trust people you get screwed over every God damn time.

Oh, is that you?

Yeah, it's about friggin time.



End of you, DMK.

You're history.

God, bad smog.



Oh, damn it!

Just great!


Places closed everywhere.

I hate days that start like this!


Oh, damn it, damn it!

Uh, gross.


Whoa, what is this, trick or treat?

Come here!


Come here!

Come here, your ass.

Uh, look, I don't know what your scene is, but don't do anything stupid, okay?

No, no, you don't seem to understand.

I've been trained to take care of myself.

You know what I'm saying?

I don't want to hurt you.

Oh, shit.

No, let go!

Let go of me!


Come on, come on, come on!



Samantha? What?

God, what are trying to do, give me a heart attack?

I thought you were Doris.

You know she decked me last night?

Knocked one of my teeth loose even.

Wait till Daddy hears about that.

You know how he's always telling me to be careful with my mouth on account of the dental plan doesn't cover anything cosmetic.

Ooh, anyway, get this--

I think Chuck and Doris spent the night together last night.

Wait till Daddy hears about that.

I mean, even if he isn't pissed off about my mouth, which I can't imagine.

What's happening?

Oh yeah, I guess you are a little confused.

God, you look terrible.

I ran away last night after she slugged me.

Left a note and everything.

I didn't have any place to go, so I spent the night in a lawn storage shed.

Pretty gross with the Synerol and everything.

God, look at this kitchen.

I'm not cleaning this up.

So anyway, since I was still here this morning I thought, "Hey, I'll go to pep squad practice and split after."

Except for I don't know if pep squad practice is on or not.

I can't get anybody on the phone.

Sammy, you can't get anybody on the phone because everybody's gone.

What? Would you grab the milk please?

I swear to God!

You made me swallow my gum.

There's nobody! I mean, there's nobody!

Oh, right, nobody. I'm sure.

Come here. Hey!

Hey, back off!

This sweater cost 80 bucks.


Stupid dog.

Look. Look at this!

At what?

Doris isn't at Chuck's.

I'll show you Doris.

Here's Doris.

This is all that's left of her. This and dust.


Here's Chuck.

Where are the kids?

It's Saturday morning. Where are the God damn kids?

They're around.

They're not around.

Look, if you're trying to scare me, you're doing it, okay?

I'm not trying to scare you.

Then stop it.

I'm not doing it!

You try calling someone.

Not just your pep squad-- anyone.

Nobody's home!

Unbelievable, that's song number sixteen on the survey this week.

Don't forget, we preview the top 20 every Friday night.

A great way to start a super weekend here in the Southland.

Get down.

Are you sure this is the radio station?

Yeah, just go on in. Well, don't push.

Do you think whatever happened happened everywhere?

Like in Burbank and places like that?

We'll ask the DJ. He does the news, doesn't he?

Search me, I always change the channel when the news comes on.

There's something in here.

So, where is he?

I mean, somebody has to run this stuff, don't they?

We Got Trouble, Not Us-- that's the name of the song.

And I'm Steve LaBeau trapped inside your radio.

The guy who really cares about you.

I mean, who else would sit in this little box every day just to play music for you.

Well, it? time to reach into the old mailbag here.

- I got a letter from-- Beam me up, Scotty.

Okay, girls, hold it right there.

You, the blonde, get into the light.


Why don't you just let my sister go and maybe you and I can work something out.

I'm not going anywhere. Shut up!

You got the wrong idea. You, into the light.

I'll give you to five. One, two-- no?

All right, let's try it this way.

Five, four, three-- Okay, okay.

Do you get a lot of dates this way?

Open your eyes.


Hey, I know what you're thinkin' but--

That you're a cretin?


You haven't seen those freaked-out zombies runnin' around here?

Yeah, I was jumped by one.

Well, you got off lucky.

Me and this girl pulled into town this morning.

You don't work here?

No, I drive a truck.

I was headin' to San Diego with this girl I picked up.

We were lookin' for a gas station.

That's when we spotted one of those--

Whatever they are.

Looked like it was eating--

Looked like it was eating a cat.

A dead cat?

Semi dead.

Who'd want to eat a live cat?

Beats the shit out of me.

This girl freaked out.

Took off running.

I spotted her about... twenty minutes later.

Looked like one of those things had...


Torn her apart.

Oh, God.


Oh, shit.

What's with her?

I think she's gonna be sick or something.

This guy she knew--

Same thing might have happened.

Is it safe around here, do you think?


I checked it out.


Are you all right?

My name's Hector.

What's yours?

Just leave me alone, okay?

Look, I..

I know we got off on the wrong foot.

But considering what the alternative is, I think we should try to get along, what do you say?

Listen, this is no time for an attitude problem.

Your little sister seems to be taking this a lot better than you.

That's 'cause she doesn't know what's goin' on.

And you do, I suppose?

Whatever's going on isn't just here, it's everywhere.

She thinks we're gonna be rescued.

That her dad's gonna come back from Honduras with the God damn Green Berets.

She could be right.

Give us a break, Hector.

Where'd you spend the night last night?

I spent the night in the back of my truck with the girl I picked up.

What else do you want to know?

Skip it.

Steel's gotta be the answer.

If Sam spent the night in a lawn storage shed--


Again, I'm an employee. I can't--

Just our way of saying Merry Christmas to you from all--


One, two, three, four.

This is Samantha Belmont, one-third owner of the Greater Los Angeles basin speaking.

You guys?

Hey, is anybody there?

Where'd you get this, a dime store?

Beats me.

It was given to me.

Yeah, well, it might be all right for date night in the barrio, but if we run into any more of those guys outside, we're gonna need a little more stopping power.

Date night in the barrio?

And here's some other changes.

Most of you guys had finals this week.

Huh, later. They're history. They're canceled.

The legal drinking age is now ten, but you will need ID.

Let's be real.

I'll be taking requests from all you teenage comet zombies on the hit line.

That's 5-5-5-4-4-8-7.

Get it? 5-5-5-hits.

Do you know where the Armed Forces Reserve Center is at Los Alamitos?


My dad used to take us there for target practice.

They store automatic weapons there.

You know how to use 'em?

Come on, Hector.

The MAC-10 submachine gun was practically designed for housewives.

I got a call.

It came in on the hit line.


Hello. It went dead.

Did they say they were okay? I don't know.

They said they were in the desert.

The desert. What desert was it?

- I don't know. Shit! Think!

Why don't you just pull your gun on her?

Maybe you can scare it out of her.

They said they were like, part of a think tank, a research group or something.

Where, was it in this State?

I forget.

Okay, let's take it real slow.

Did they mention a town?

Uh, someplace they were near, like maybe Blythe, Bishop?

Uh, what about Edwards Air Force Base?

If I knew, I'd tell you. I didn't expect the call, you know.

I didn't take notes or something.

Just try and remember.

You think I'm not telling you something on purpose?

Well, if they'll stay put, we can get them.

From a psychological standpoint, the radio station represents a link to normalcy.

I don't think they'll wander far as long as it's operating.

Dr. Carter, I'd just like to say up front, I'm opposed to this.

There's no reason for us to bring those people or any other survivors back here.

What about the disintegration factor?

You just want to let that happen?

We don't know that the condition is progressive.

I think we've established that, Audrey.

Partial protection seems to result in a slowing of the overall effect.

But progression is steady in any case.

Drying of the body fluids-- Oh, get to the point, Oscar!

We've heard this a thousand times. What about the dust?

Ultimately, there is nothing left but calcium dust.

Right, so there isn't even enough hope to warrant bringing anybody back here.

So, what you're saying is, we shouldn't even try.


We don't want to be caught in the city after dark.

We'll leave tomorrow.

We've had an indication of some survivors in San Bernardino, as well-- four, maybe five.

Wait, girls, just shut up!

Samantha, did they say anything else? Anything?

Yeah. They said be careful on the street.

Because some people were exposed to the comet a little bit.

What happened to Doris is happening to them.

Only slower.

And like... they're dangerous.

Like what happened to Larry.

You're not gonna blame me because the phone went dead.

I'm not the phone company.

Nobody's the phone company anymore.



Where were you guys earlier?

Oh, shit. My license.

Oh, shit!

I know you guys are probably going to give me a ticket or something, but I am really glad to see--

It's the weekend comet sale.

Everything must go.

Big savings on tuners, turntables, car stereos.

Also demos and crate damaged items.

This weekend only. Henry's Stereo Warehouse.

Fourth and Alameda. Free coffee for the adults.

Free balloons for the kids.

Number one.

This is from your stepmom, you punk.

They're here, they're here!

What's wrong? It's okay, I got it.

You've got her? Yeah, I got her!

Sammy, Sam, it's only a dream.

I know.

I know.

Is there anything I can do?

I'm fine.

Interstate Technologies is an equal opportunity employer.

Looks like the weather is shaping up for a great weekend.

You know, it's hard to believe that there's only 11 more shopping days till Christmas.

Good luck finding a parking space within hitchhiking distance of a mall.

You know how jammed it can get.

She Okay?

Yeah. I guess so.

Come on in, have a seat.


I have to go to San Diego tomorrow.


My mom.

Some friends, my sister.

But you know they're gone.

I know, but...

I still have to find out.

I mean, you guys know for sure, but I don't know.

Did you have like, a close family?


Pretty close.


No, not really.

My real mom hung around till my dad came back from Viet Nam and then she split.

So, it's been mostly me and Sam.

And Dad and Third Special Forces.

Smoke Bomb Hill.

Fort Bragg.

But, then around about sixth or seventh grade, it became real obvious that we weren't boys and we were never gonna go to ranger school.

So, I guess Dad figured there was nothing more to offer us.

So, he found us a new mom.

Went off looking for a war.

What about the um...

the guy?


Oh, he and I weren't going steady or anything like that.

Look, don't go to San Diego, okay?

I have to.

But I'll be back.

Please, okay?

What'll you give me if I come back?


I'll give you Florida.

Florida and Texas.

Florida, Texas, and Hawaii.


I wanted Hawaii.

When I come back...

I'll take you to dinner.

Your choice.



See, this is the problem with these things.

Daddy would have gotten us Uzis.

The car didn't know the difference.

So, did you make it with him last night?


The good humor man, who do you think'?

Jeez, is that what's buggin' you'?

That's no answer, man?

No, I didn't make it with him last night.

Why are you so weirded out?

Oh, right, Reg, why should I be weirded out?

My sister, who swiped every guy I ever had my eye on, has now swiped the last guy in the whole freaked-out world.




I don't know who you are out there, but I have a gun.

So, if I were you, I'd split while I had a chance.


Look kid, just stay away, we don't want any!


Get outta here, you little creep.

Lucky for you I like kids.

Jesus! There goes the neighborhood.


Audrey, what's the code?


We found survivors.

How long will the blood tests take?

Not long.

I've talked with some of the others and we decided that it would be more beneficial to conduct the blood tests in the field.

So, I want you to go to L.A. with the rest of the group.

Whatever the majority wants.

You don't seem to hold majority rule in very high regard.

If something's wrong, it's wrong.

Majority rule doesn't have anything to do with it.

But it goes straight to the core purpose of our group, which is to survive.

You'll grant me that?

The core purpose never included bringing outsiders to the facility.

It's about the twelfth can you've downed this morning.


Yeah, well, what are you going to do when your complexion freaks out?

Dermatologist is dead, you know.

I know, and I'm getting a rash or something too.

Oh, God, you and your rashes.

Hey, I'm sorry if the end of the world makes me a little nervous.

So, do you like him?

Come on, Sam.

I'm just interested.

Yeah, well, I guess so.

I mean, he's nice.

There was this new guy at school, Paul Morgan.

He transferred from Taft. Junior.

Oh, I don't hang around with juniors much.

I liked him.


I mean, he was from Taft, but...

he was nice.

Kathy said he was probably going to ask me out.


She was flunking algebra and she was trying to figure out some way to keep her parents from finding out.

This was a really lucky break for her.

No wonder I'm breaking out.

Think we could go home and change?


Why don't we get a little creative?


Do you have your, uh-- Do you have your MasterCard on ya?


Good, 'cause you don't need it.

The stores are open!

Hey, Reg, which do you like better?

This or this.

Um, the second one. Yeah, definitely.

How come? 'Cause it'll stay in style longer.

Come on.

I guess you're right, actually.

Yeah, we gotta think of these things, you know?

All right, let's do it.

You know, I've been thinking.

Don't set any dangerous precedents.

What if Hector's got the same problem we have?

Such as?

Such as no guys.



I mean, what if Hector's gay?

I'm sure.

Think it over. You said he didn't come on to you last night.


So, that means that the last guy on Earth is either a gentleman or a fag.

I mean, what are the odds. In L.A.?

Things could be very interesting around here, Regina.

Attention shoppers.

I trust you've got credit cards to pay for all that stuff.

What's the matter? Lost something?

Check with lost and found on the second floor.

Didn't find this one.

You dirty rat.

Get her, boys.




Take it easy.

Well, I think it's time to take the high ground.

Listen, you guys.

We're expecting some friends here any minute.

Look, you just split now, okay?

And we'll tell them not to hurt you.


No imagination.

Look, over there. Sitting duck.



Eat glass, creeps.

How'd you like that?

You guys are a bunch of wimps.

You can't hit anything.



♪ Da-da. ♪

Get her.

Knock that shit off.

Hello out there in television land.

All right, here's the deal.

If bachelorette number one isn't out here in half a tick, I'm gonna ice bachelorette number two.

Got it?

Come on.

Let her go!

I'm sorry, miss, I can't have you holding one of my people hostage.

Even if you pull the trigger, I can still take him out.

And you.

Come on, Willy, she means it.

Miss, you're not getting the point.

I can't have you holding one of my people hostage.

You're crazy!

I'm not crazy, I just don't give a fuck!

What do you think, 20, 30 minutes?

No more.

They could be anywhere by now.

Let's go back.

Let's apply a little deductive reasoning.

Deductive reasoning?

Where would adolescents with nothing to do go?

See, we worked really had to get ahead in this business, girls.

And we don't get shit for it!

But we do it because we know we can work our way up through the system.

And the system works.

Why, just a few days ago, we were only stock boys.

Now we own the store.

The American way.

And then this happens.

What are you talking about?

Well, I'm talking about you.

Coming in here and ripping us off!

What do you want?

You want us to pay for it, what?

You wouldn't believe what we want from you.

In your worst nightmare, you wouldn't believe.

Let's play a game!

It's called scary noises.

This is the closest shopping arcade.

But the whole area is an absolute monument to consumerism.

All we can do is hope.

Check all the floors including the basement.

Isn't that a scary noise?

Wanna hear it again?

Gosh, the suspense is killing me.

Let's do it again.

An E-ticket attraction.

Let's do it again.

Now, wait a minute.

I don't think there's really a bullet in here.

No, now see there, it's loaded.

I just needed to be a little more patient.

I think this is it, girls. I really do.

Uh... we're not with these guys.

Really, like, we just met 'em an hour ago.

I mean, look at this stuff that we have.

Look at this skirt...

It's ironic.

Of all the great minds of the world, all the great intellects, who should survive?

Or almost survive.

I don't have to see the result of the blood test.

I can guess what they say about that one.

You're right.

It would be senseless to take her back.

Look, I'll stay and take care of it.

Then if this Hector person shows up, I can run tests on him too.

Of course, uh, it would be out of the question to let you remain by yourself.

I'll stay here with you.

Listen, thanks for suggesting that I wait for Hector.

I mean, I know Reggie'll probably get him, but I'd like to have a shot at it.

Samantha, I need you to lie down.

Hector's not exactly a fox, but... considering what's left, he's not bad.

He sounds cute.

Is he coming back?


But we should wait for him at the radio station.

That's where he'll go.

What's that?

Um, I'm gonna give you something.

For what?

Well, your skin's been a little irritated.

Yeah, a rash.

It could be a rash, but it could also be something else.

It's one of the main symptoms of--

The comet, no.

See, I always get rashes like, when I have a fight with Doris or I break up with a boyfriend.

It's nerves, and you know, the way things have been going around here lately, I'm surprised I don't look like strawberry Jell-O.

But if I do have that stuff, this'll get rid of it, right?

Yeah. God, you had me worried.

Don't worry.

Just a pinch, now.


So you guys are like, geniuses, right?

Yeah, I thought so.

We have a couple of geniuses at my school.


Yeah, they're both wimps.

Is, uh...

Is that it?

What did you want me to do, Oscar?

Take her out back and shoot her in the head?

I simply meant I was glad it was... painless.

I don't think we have to stay around.

She didn't think that he was coming back.

I feel we can wait.

But, uh...

I-- I feel the radio station is the more logical place.

Listen, Oscar, you were right about the condition being progressive.

But it is also accelerating, apparently.

We don't have weeks.

We have maybe hours.

I don't know.

We have a commitment.

But I do know, I don't have enough to debate the issue.

I am not going to be a party to taking anybody else back.

You have to live up to it.

What do you expect me to do, Oscar?

Go for my gun?

Of course not.

Hey, it's 450 FM in the PM.

I'm Steve LaBeau, and you're listening to 50,000 watts of rock and roll at tower of power over the City of Angels.


Merry Christmas.



Hi. Hm.


Did you happen to see two girls runnin' around here?

One's a cheerleader.

I'm not thinking straight.

I wrote everything down, but...

I think I misspelled it.

That pad on the table.

You need this?

No, thanks, I have one.

Seems to be the perfect Christmas gift this year.

I'm gonna miss Christmas.


I want you to know that I thought they were talking hypothetically.

Until they found the first survivors.

Then they really did it.

Some of those survivors were just kids.

Hey, wait a minute. What's all this about blood?

They think they can generate a serum.

A serum?

We were exposed. Not a lot. Just enough.

They left the ventilating ducts wide open.

The fans going.

Very scientific.

Very stupid.

In 36 hours you will be able to vacuum up the last of them up from the carpet.

Hey, you know what?

She was right.

You are cute.

Santa Claus.


Have you ever had hepatitis?

Darn tags.

Do you have a pair of scissors?


Have you ever had hepatitis?

Cute kids.

They a part of you guys?


They're survivors just like you are.

Neat girl, huh?

If you like the type.

Come on, kids, come with me.

Have you ever had hepatitis?

No, I had mono once, though.

Caught if from this guy named Randy Sharp.



- Are you pregnant? Nope.

Thought I was once, though.

That's not important.

That's what you think.

That was the longest three weeks of my life.

You know I can't remember.

How much blood were we expected to get from these people?

Uh, 300 ccs, yes, that's it. That can't be right.

If we draw 300 ccs a day, they'll expire altogether.

No, I don't think so, now that we've terminated brain functions.

I mean, they're brain dead.

All they can do now is manufacture blood.

Well, maybe.

Well, we aren't going to get anything like 300 ccs out of those children.

No, but we will out of that teenager.

I hope she's just as healthy as she looks.

Boy, did you see her hair?

What I've give to have hair like that.

What is this place?

Do you have diabetes?

I mean, is this some sort of, I don't know, underground hospital, or what?

You're a very strong willed young lady.


You have cancer?

No, I am a Cancer.

I just want to know where I am and what I'm doing here.


Oh, gosh, uh, could you hand me that arterial--

Got it.

Well, it's up to the respirators now.

Why don't we prep the children?

When we're finished with them, we can start on that girl.

They're so cute.

I love working with kids.

Yeah. Oh, don't forget the lights.

Are you taking any medication?

Have you had any medication within the last 24 hours?

Where's my sister?

Dr. Carter, may I see you a moment?

All right.

I mean, she should be here by now, shouldn't she?

Even if Hector didn't show up?

Your sister's dead.


I realize this comes as a shock, but she had been exposed, and in 48 hours she would have died anyway.

It was quite painless I can assure you.

My, you both have nice, strong hearts.

Are we gonna get shots?

No, no shots, I promise.

Audrey? Not back yet.

Listen, we may have a situation on our hands here.

I can't locate Rogers anyplace in the compound.


I can't rule out the possibility that he may already have gone into transition.

We can't wait for Audrey.

You're gonna have to start with the children and that one in there.

We need blood to develop the serum.

We don't have enough for everyone.

We're not robots, Doctor.

We're not all gonna fall over at one time.

Some of us will last a little longer while others of us have more immediate need.

You're smart. You can figure that out.

Psychology? not an exact science, but my God, man, anybody can add two and two!

I'm very sorry about your sister.

It's a tragedy.

It, uh, it truly is.

And I can understand your hostility, but no matter how upset you are, breaking an expensive piece of equipment won't solve anything.

I mean, striking out at inanimate objects is really quite childish.

Even you should be able to realize that.


Howdy, partner. How you doin'?

Who are you? My names Hec.

Hec Gomez.

Hey, them's real fine duds you got there.

You a Maytag repairman? How'd you find this place?

Well, uh, this lady back in L.A. sent me.

Hey, you been to L.A. lately?

It's cleaned out, man, I'm tellin' ya.

Hey, come here, I wanna show you somethin'.

Come on.

Hey, you know how the Harbor Freeway's always bumper to bumper?

Well, you can go 150 miles an hour if you want to.

Me and this baby.

We go through them freeways like turkey crap through a tin horn.

Hey, uh...

You like girls?

Look in here.

She's dead. She ain't dead.

See, this lady shot her up with sodium pentothal and make this fella think she was dead.


So you wouldn't suck her blood out, you asshole.

Son of a bitch!


Excuse me, everyone.

I'm afraid our adolescent guest has escaped.

She's quite hostile.

She may have already gone topside, so please, take a moment to look around you.

Check those rooms and I'll check this one.

Let's go.

Everything's under control.


You said no shots.

This isn't a shot, sweetheart.

It'll just--

You'll just giggle and then you'll feel a little sleepy.

That's right.

And when you wake up, do you know where you'll be?

Where? With Santa Claus at the North Pole.

In fact, you'll live with Santa Claus for the rest of your life.

Hey, there's no such thing as Santa Claus.


You don't believe in Santa?

Life support systems.

Wilson, come with me.

Keep an eye on her. Right.

Now, Wilson!

Forget the door! Turn off the alarm!


I don't know.

My parents told me never to breathe anything from strangers.


Get your hands up.

What are you guys doing?

They said if we breathe this, we could go to the North Pole and see Santa Claus.

That's so sick.


Holy shit!

Whoa. Sam?

I give, I give.

They said you were dead.

They were exaggerating totally.

Hey, that's a great outfit. Thanks.

Is that guy in the hallway dead?



You can give up if you want to, Wilson.

But we still have the two children and that girl.

I forgot my football.

We'll get you another football.

We'll get you a stadium.


Get everybody topside. Now!

What about them?

Screw them.

Okay, kids, going up.

Put your hands down, kids.

God, don't be so stupid.

Come on, kids! Who are the kids?

I'm Brian. I'm Sarah.

Yeah, and I'm Aunt Reg and that's Aunt Sam and that's Uncle Hector.

Can I have my bunny?

In a minute. Beat feet, Uncle Hector.

Uncle Hector?

Hey, it's my bunny, you know?

Where have you been?

Can we change this?

Arranging a hotfoot for your friends.

I really hate this music.

Give me a break!

What are you doing?

I'm not kidding, I get car sick without my bunny.

Come on, Reg, give the kid the bunny.

We've stopped, why have we stopped?

Son of a-- Don't shoot them, you idiot.

Okay, kids, cover your eyes for Uncle Hector.


Think tank, huh?

Uh, look, couldn't we just like, leave?

Think over this!

We can get them.

- Hey, we'll be taking off now. We have to get them.

Look us up at Chasen's. Uh, we'll party down, huh?

Come on. Come on, come on, this is fun.

The kids would like to say good-bye, it's been fun.

Hope to see you around real soon.

Is that gasoline I smell?

Wait, wait, don't, don't!


All right, Hector.

Let go of her! Leave her alone!


- Reggie. It's all right.

- It's all right. It's okay.

I got you.

It's all right.

It's okay.

I got you.


Okay, kids, smile, come on.

Oh, don't-- God, you're so cute! You're just so cute-- wait.

Mr. Bunny needs to be in this picture too.

So, okay, that's great.

Can I take this jacket off?

It itches. No, you can't.

I just want to take another picture, all right?

Please? No.

Now, you just hold on to that.

Stay there. Okay, perfect. Oh, brother.

There's still a few zombies around.

Don't slouch. And Sarah--

Hold that.


Did the flash go off?

Can't tell on these things.

Hey, if you're gonna throw those guns away, can I have one?

Don't look at me.

I mean, I don't know where she gets that stuff.

Smile, Hec.


Maybe I could be a nun or something.

Ooh, I just love these pictures.

You've only taken about 30 of 'em.

You know, we're going to need some more film soon.

Let me straighten your tie. Okay.

God, they look like the Brady Bunch.

What are you waiting for?

Can I see 'em?

We're waiting for the light to change.

We do not cross against the light.

Are you nuts, Auntie Regina?

You may as well face the facts, Samantha.

The whole burden of civilization has fallen upon us.

What's that supposed to mean?

It means we do not cross against the light.

That's totally stupid!

There's nobody here!

See, we're talking ghost town!

See what happens.

God, I'm sorry, but you shouldn't cross against the light like that.

Hey, you guys are survivors too, huh?

What? Nothin'.

Great car.

Thanks, I have 23 of them. You want to go for a ride?

More than you know.

We don't know anything about this guy.

Where's he from?

What's his name?

What's your name. Danny Mason Keener.

Danny Mason Keener, okay?

Yeah, all right, well, just be back by midnight, okay?


The burden of civilization is on us, okay?

Oh, yeah.

Bitchin', isn't it?