Roma (1972) Script

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The restoration of Roma (1972) was created from the 35mm version held by Titanus at the Cineteca di Bologna.

In 1972, after the first screening ofthe film in Rome, Fellini, along with the producer and screenwriter Bernardino Zapponi, decided to shorten some sequences for the international market.

Only traces remain ofthese shots in the production documentation and the Deposito Legale's positive print version, stored at the CSC - National Film Archive.

This copy is the version for the international market.

The restoration was carried out at the Immagine Ritrovata lab, Bologna, in 2010.

He's written from America. What does he say?

They eat everything out of cans over there.

The first image of Rome was a centuries-old stone rising out of the field just outside my hometown.

Later on, at school, we were told other interesting things about Rome.

This is the Rubicon... the river Julius Caesar crossed, saying, "Alea iacta est!"

Take offyour shoes, children. Take offyour shoes and we'll cross the river together.

Alea iacta est!

To Rome. To Rome!

The fascist shit, his head is split - half a head, they say Crossed the Rubicon one day and lost his balls along the way

Now we've got another meanie by the name of Mussolini Julius Caesar took a chance and led his army into France In those days, the French were Gauls and Caesar a man with balls

Bring me then Metellus Cimbers' petition and I shall examine it.

And now, hands, speak for me.

You too, Brutus?

My son.

Julius Caesar.

Sir, if I may say so, last night you had us all in tears.

It was a truly artistic performance.

Eternal gratitude to our humble web-footed friends.

To our humble web-footed friends with their excited quacking.

It's always that one, sir. Always the same one.

Woke the soldiers who picked up their weapons and saved Rome.

And you can hear their descendants quacking right outside the window.

Careful, now. Careful.

Return to your seats.

I won't tolerate any disorder. Stop it.

You are not out in the streets now. You're in school!

Barbetti! Stacchiotti! Ballazzi! I'll beat you to death, by God! saecula saeculorum, amen. On your feet.




Silence. Order.

Order and silence.

The bronze she-wolf at the Capitol.

Santa Maria Maggiore, one ofthe four Roman basilicas.

The tomb of Cecilia Metella on the Appia Antica.

The Arch of Constantine.

The altar ofthe fatherland.

St Peter's, Holy Mother Church's greatest temple.

Turn it off! Turn on the lights, somebody!

The lights!

Don't look, children. Close your eyes. It's the devil.

Whoever looks will go to hell. Keep your eyes closed.

It's the devil! The devil! Good Lord! On your feet!

But church bells are the voice of God.

We should turn on the radio, signora.

There's a blessing from the Pope. Just bring the soup here, you idiot!

Stay where you are! But, Severino, it's a papal blessing.

So put it on the salad!

Shame on you. You'll go to hell. Stay where you are.

On your knees. Don't pay attention to your good-for-nothing father.

Drop dead, you old bat!

For heaven's sake, folks, there's no need to push. We've got enough seats.

Three adults, two children and one maid. What?

Full price for a maid? Well, I'll be damned.

Shut up! Adele, keep an eye on that kid.

Carmela, the baby!

Hang on to my coat and follow me. Excuse me. Pardon me.

Besides, there's three shows today. Come back later.

May the gods smile upon you, Pompeo.

I have come to bid you farewell.

With what adventures, Priscilla the Christian?

I have a generous nature. But vengeance is a temptress.

Be on your guard, both of you. And yet, I love her.

No, no, have mercy!

I beg you, mercy! Let me go!

There are some seats. Hurry! Adele! Leonina! You sit over there.

My wife's purse was on that seat. Purses don't count.

Carmela, the baby!

Sir, you are an ill-mannered boor, that's what you are.

And you don't seem to realise who I am. I'm the school principal, that's who.

The principal, understand?

Rome: the parade of October 28 was in an atmosphere of enthusiasm.

The entire city was there to greet our leader and proclaim its faith in the glorious and indomitable destiny ofthe imperial fatherland.

His Excellency S. De Carolis took part in the jump through the hoop.

What a man.

Sons of the she-wolf flocked to the beaches of Rome where Italians and their automobiles paraded to the songs of the revolution followed by a box lunch which included bread, famous national cheeses and piping red tea.


The magnificent stone walls of the Pitti Palace seem to smile beneath the warm spring sunshine.

This lady was the wife of the local chemist.

Everyone said she was worse than Messalina.

And no need to play with yourself. That's what's nice about Rome.

It's big and nobody knows you. You are free to come and go.

What about the Roman women? What are they like?

The Roman women? They've got an ass as wide as that.

Quit fucking around and get out of my way.

Don't worry. I'm going.

Get your lottery tickets here.

Hey there, need a lighter? No, thanks. I've already got one.

I'll give you, as a present, a bolt offirst-class English wool.

Got a place to sleep tonight? In Via Albalonga.

I have a room with your own entrance and a cute little French girl.


Hotel Dragoni. Hotel Dragoni!

Veal at eight lire a kilo. What's this world coming to?

There's only two things you can be sure of.

That's right. Death and taxes.

I'm looking for the Palletta family. Fourth floor.

The elevator's broken.

David, I'm going to beat the hell out ofyou.

There, stupid!

You always do it wrong.

Where can I find the Palletta family?

Thank you.

He says to me, "Are you kidding me, or are you really stupid?"

"What do you mean?"

And he says, "Come on. You must be kidding." I say, "What do you mean?"

So? What do you mean, so?

The solemn military and religious rites at the tomb of the unknown...

I'm gonna throw the cat out the window!

His Excellency Count Racobelli attended and Mons. Troisi Ragusa was there to represent the Holy Sea.

Hey! Listen.

Ciao. Is your mother home?


Anybody home?


Antonietta! I did it!

Stay there a minute. I'm coming.

There's someone at the door. I did it! I did it!

Signora, that young man is here, the one whose mother wrote you from up north.

Shall I let him in?

How do you do? I was making pasta. Let me help you.

Come in. Come in, please. Thanks.

Make yourself at home.

The signora's not feeling very well. Come on. This way.

One of her ovaries is inflamed.

We'll just set it down here, all right? Come on. I'll show you the house.

Come in, come in.

I hope you don't mind children, because there's a lot ofthem living here.

This is the dining room. Florentine furniture. Nice, eh?

That's the signora's eldest son. Who is it?

He's going to work as a clerk.

Why did you have to go to the beach? How do you do?

Why shouldn't I have gone? Did you have to go at noon?

When, then?

My poor baby.

A bad sunburn, eh? Do you have a fever?

I think so, yeah.

Nice shirt you've got there. Thank you.

Are you afraid of Chinamen? He is one and he's even got kitchen privileges.

My God, it stinks in here. Why don't you open the window when you cook?

Bucatini matriciana sauce. Have some?

No, thank you. Very good. Delicious.

Let me out of here before I throw up.

Bucatini matriciana. Yeah, for pigs.

Signora, shall I show him the kitchen?

Yes, honey, show him the kitchen.

Oh, my God! What have I done to deserve such suffering?

The kitchen's this way.

After you. No, please, after you.

Antonietta, I did it!

I did it! I did it!

All right, so you did it. You don't have to broadcast it.

Just a moment.

Ciao. Good afternoon.

What did you bring me? Nothing, yet. What do you want?

How about you? Do you think there'll be a war?

Want to see the little granny? Sure. That's why I came.

Follow me.

She's littler than us kids.

Little granny! Look who's here!

Bless you. Thank you, and same to you.

Bet your granny's not that little. Bet your granny's not that little.

What's this? This is my room.

I haven't tidied up yet.

It's nice and sunny. Will you put down those scissors!

Good afternoon. Landi is the name. Marco Landi.

Remember me? I think so.

I made my debut with Camerini and I worked a lot with Gennaro Righelli.

I play the part ofthe bon vivant.

I was the butler in Heartthrob. Yes, of course.

But you're much too young to remember. No, I do. I really do.

By the way, you're a reporter, aren't you?

I could give you an interview. Sure, except I'm not working yet.

My friends, we have a newspaper reporter among us.

Hello. Hello.

I presume you will be staying here. Enjoy your meal.

I refuse to believe that the people of Great Britain, always friends, feel it their duty to lead Europe into a catastrophe by defending an African nation.

The resemblance is frightening.

Universally branded and without the shadow of any kind of civilization against this nation of heroes, artists, poets, saints, navigators...

Lucrezia! What do you want, Ma?

Send the young man in here. I want to have a look.

Antonietta, she wants to see him. All right, miss.

Shall I take him?

Ifthe Mediterranean is a shortcut for England and a permanent zone for Russia, for us Italians it is like itself.

Keep still for a minute or you'll knock me over.

May I come in?

May I come in? Yes, and bring him with you.

You're so young and distinguished-looking too.

You'll like it here.

I'm sure your mother wrote me, you know. Poor woman.

Did you show him the house? Of course, and he liked it too.

Good. You look like a nice boy. That's all. You can go now.

One more thing before I forget.

Look me in the eyes, boy. There's to be no fooling around in this house.

We're church-going people. We respect others and want respect in return.

I wouldn't come to your house and do anything dirty.

So let's live in peace and not bust each other's balls.

Ma, I don't want to eat today.

Poor baby. Not even a teeny bite? What has the sun done to you?

I want to lie next to you, Mama.

My God, why couldn't you stay home?

We brought two chickens with us.

Hey, do you want me to throw you in the oven?

And then we want to eat at Ostia.

Hey! Sit down with us.

Marcello, give him a chair. You're family now.

I'll put him with these friends, OK? Was it good?

That's short pasta.

No, you don't. I'll put the baby here.

Go on. Sit down.

You know the saying: "The devil takes whoever eats alone."

...cannolicchi, cheese and pepper, penne in hot sauce.

Let me make up my own mind.

What do you think? Take my advice. Cheese and pepper.

Cheese and pepper sauce. I had that for lunch. What else is there?

How about rigatoni in anchovy sauce?

All right, spit out that gum. You're going to eat now.

And you keep still.

Fettuccine with chicken giblets... Bucatini in carbonara sauce...

And then there's our specialities, kidneys, tripe...

Maybe the schiaffoni? I'll just try a small portion because I've been having trouble with my stomach all night long.

Take my advice. Have the pajata. What's that, pajata?

It's calf gut filled with milk.

Remo, don't forget this young gentleman.

Here, eat some ofthese. They're not snails. They're pigeons.

Giggetto, where are the bananas? Sorry, we're all out. Just one left.

Then give me that one. Do you think I'm crazy?

Who's that, Lallo's daughter? Whose do you think, the priest's?

Is she that big already? Isn't she cute? Can't tell her face from her behind.

I dreamt about poor Aunt Judy last night and asked her a winning number.

Then she fried this broccoli with a mint leaf. You should have tasted it.

You know what they say: "The more you eat, the more you shit."

I told you not to let him eat any tripe. He's had a fever since then.

All right, then give him a couple of snails.

But it almost killed him. Then I guess it'll kill me too.

Give her something to drink so she'll shut her trap.

Cheers! Go on. Drink up.

I want some ice cream! Where's my ice cream?

You got to me once already.

Hey, Verna! Come on down!

Come on down! What's the matter with you, anyway?

Come here before I beat the hell out ofyou. Come on.

Verna! Come on down!

Tell your sister to get down here before I throw her offthat balcony.

And hurry up.

I asked for a half-portion, but this plate is practically empty.

You can always order more.

Enjoy your meal everyone. Thanks.

Bon appetite. Thank you. Say thank you.

Slowly. Don't eat so fast or you'll choke to death.

Nobody's going to steal your plate.

I'm not feeling well. I've had heartburn since yesterday morning.

You have a big heart.

Silvano! Silvano! Here she is! I brought her down.


Here she is, everybody. "Verna the Sulker" has arrived.

What...? Now what's the matter?

Come on. Let's make up. Come on. Just leave me in peace.

Open that sweet little mouth ofyours. Come on. Open it.

You silly, stupid shit. You're the stupid shit.

Not me. You. That's who. You are both stupid shits.

These snails are too full of mint. I can't taste anything else.

Is that so? And not enough peppers.

Taste these, one of our most popular specialities.

I'll show you how to eat them. Watch carefully.

Here, take a pin and dig in.

You can learn a lot from snails, young man.

Your girlfriend will explain that to you one day.

I never eat snails in restaurants.

Only when I cook them myself because I soak them for four days first.

Then you can... suck them clean.

But I wouldn't touch these ones!

Don't listen to what she says.

In Rome we say, "No matter what you eat, it all turns to shit."

And what you eat tastes like shit. Excuse me.

Mary had a little sheep With the sheep she went to sleep The sheep turned out to be a ram Mary had a little lamb Where'd she learn those? Will you listen to that!

Some mother you are, teaching her that stuff!

You taught her, not me.

What do you mean me? I didn't teach her anything.

Pinocchio's nose was long As long as Pinocchio's dong Maestro, give me a "la."

All together now...

All right, all right, I'm coming. Torquato, bring this guy a drink.

Cough up some money for the orphans. We gave last year.

Give me that. I'll serve them. How about this, eh?

And you'd better eat it all. We don't believe in leftovers.

Will you keep still!

What about the Rome oftoday?

What impression does it make on the visitor arriving for the first time?

Inevitably, coming off the motorway one finds oneself on the Grande Raccordo Anulare which circles the city like one of Saturn's rings.

Scaratti at midfield?

Christ! We'll never win.


You bet on the wrong team.

Oh, get lost.

How much longer? It's about to rain. Almost ready.

Tough life, eh, boys?

Hold on tight.

Hey, you bloody gypsies, we're going to stomp the shit out ofyou today.

Go get your sister and we'll bust her cherry for her.

Can you hear me? Raise the boom as high as you can.

Move! Move! Move!

Let's kick the ruling class back out on its ass!

Tell me what you see. I'm framing Piazza di Siena.

There's a tourist bus coming into the shot. Shall I follow it?

Yeah, stay with it.

Do you want a picture? I'll take it for you. Oh, thanks.

You'll shine in a photo.

There. Don't move. Smile.

What are you framing now?

Domes and bell towers. It's beautiful. I can see the whole city.

The piazzas, the streets, people on their way to work.

Ifyou're seeing people on their way to work, it ain't Rome.

Get lost.

You're up so high you must be seeing another city.

That's what they say about Romans, and here we are sweating blood all day.

This isn't Rome anymore. Everyone's gone crazy. Too much of a hurry.

They've become mean. The true Romans have disappeared.

You don't think so? Just take a look around.

All you see are filthy hippies, students who don't want to study, transvestites, drug addicts, trash of every kind.

You're forgetting that this film will be seen abroad.

Ifyou show the perverts, the street whores, negative aspects, what are they going to think of our lovely Rome?

What is it?

He wanted to ask you ifyour film would give a Roman perspective on the important and eternal problems faced by modern-day society.

And we're not only referring to the problems in the educational system.

And the working world, with problems in the factories, in housing.

We wouldn't want to see the same old colourful Rome, easygoing, messy.

The usual bland and commercial image. That's not the only Rome.

But I think a person should be true to his own nature.

Lunch time!

Pino, what do you see now? The station and a small dome.

Yeah, it must be the dome ofthe old Barafonda Theatre.

That's what I'd like to film, for example, a variety show at the Barafonda Theatre, thirty years ago, at the beginning of the war.

Hey, shit-face! So you're here too, eh?

Will you move your big feet?

What do you say, Spino? How's it going?

Give me a light, will you?

Sit down! Just cos you ate some glass don't mean you're a window.

He can't help it. He's never seen one before.

Don't look too hard, you might hurt yourself.

Take 'em away.

Hey, Ciriola, how do you like that? She's really good looking, isn't she?

Hey, Pericles! Pericles!

Ding-Dong. What do you want? Shove that spotlight up your ass.

Here I am, ladies and gentlemen. Good evening.

Most comedians start things off with a joke or two before their routine.

Hey, get offthe stage.

Well, I don't tell jokes because I'm not very good at it.

So ifyou don't mind I'd like to present a few of my imitations.

After my successful tour of Roccasecca, Frascati, Marino and Zagarolo, I was greatly honoured to perform for the royal police force.

All right, shall we begin? Just a moment.

The first imitation is that of a man who has eaten too much.

I said get offthe stage.

And now, my second imitation.

What's the matter, are you deaf? The man said get off.

Sit down, you big loudmouth. Second imitation.

A young lady having a shower. Maestro!

Hey, do us all a favour and go away!

Yeah, go away!

Why? I've as much right to make a living as anyone else, haven't I?

Just disappear. All right, ifyou don't go, we will.

We'll pretend we enjoyed the act and you pretend it's over. OK?

I'm what's known as "stilé." Stilé, achmilé, you stink too.

Here you have the modern-day saturnalia, the variety show.

As you can see, it is a combination of circus maximus and brothel.

Listen, ifyou're going to start talking dirty, I'm leaving.

What did I say? I mentioned a brothel.

Even Proust, in Remembrance ofThings Past, gives us a lengthy description of a house of ill repute.

Oh, you and your damned Proust.

But I've got to work like everyone else.

Yes. So go out and find a job.

Hey, Maestro, strike up the band.

That's so funny.

Will you shut your trap? You guys are really making me laugh.

I'm laughing so much it hurts.

Goddamn bastards. Won't let decent people enjoy an evening oftheatre.

That man's a real artist, lady. Get lost.

I heard a little noise

Coming from the audience Get lost!

Listen, lady, what do you want from me?

Certain people shouldn't be allowed in here.

I bought a ticket to enjoy the show. So just shut up and leave me alone.

What are you trying to do? Ruin everybody's evening?

Ifyou're not having fun, go home and play with yourself.

Kiss my ass.

There. Madam, really!

You ought to be ashamed ofyourself. He's only human.

We're all humans, but we don't go around doing that.

He's going to get my purse right in his face.

What a bastard!

Right, you little shit, I'm going to smash your head in.

Have you lost your mind? I didn't do it. It wasn't me.

I saw you throwing those beans at me. I keep telling you, it wasn't me.

I'm gonna rip your arms off. Gonna rip 'em both off.

Pipe down, baldy.

Hey, Maestro, see ifyou can play this.

Stick it up your ass. How about this one?

Up your mother's too.

And now we come to the main attraction ofthe evening... the Amateur Hour.

Where did that big bloke go? The tall one with all those muscles?

He was right here a minute ago.

Did somebody shrink you? No.

Born premature? Yes.

I bet he was born even before Dad got through with Mother.

What's your name? Alvaro.

And what do you do? Tap dance.

Yeah, but what do you do besides that? I'm an electrician.

An electrician. And you learned how to dance from all those shocks.

OK, ladies and gentlemen, Alvaro!

An imitation of Fred Astaire.


I feel sick!


I feel sick! Help!

Hey, Chiodo, it's here.

Here it is. Here it is.

Give me it. Give it here.

Let me have it. Go on.

Make yourself a fur coat, Fred Astaire.

That's what you had for dinner, eh? Double-time, Maestro.

Ifyou'd thrown it at me, you would have eaten it for sure.

Your father's moustache! At least he wasn't queer like yours.

Same to you. I'll take care ofyou later.

Come here, darlin'. Come over here.

What's your name? Loredana Fiorini.

And what are you going to sing? "You Stole My Heart."

"You Stole My Heart."


Get back in the toilet, you bag of shit.

Have you got a match, young man? I really don't know why they let her sing.

Wouldn't you be better off at home, doing the dishes, girlie?

Thank you.

Whatever happened to talent?

I feel sorry for the poor girl.

Hope I didn't disturb you.

Come with me for a minute. What do you wanna talk to me for?

Just for two minutes.

You must have me mixed up with someone else.

I've not done anything, you're making a big mistake.

Go on. Move.

Ladies and gentlemen, the three Kants.

I said Kant and not what your dirty minds are probably thinking.

"Trotta Cavallino"!

Shut up!

You'd like to hear "Trotta Cavallino"?

I like it. It's a nice song, isn't it?

Hey, Orestes, give me a hand.

Your attention, please, everybody.

Attention! We interrupt the show to give you some good news.

After all, our country comes first!

The radio just broadcast the following war bulletin which I'm proud to read to you.

"The attack on Sicily by the enemy began last night

"backed by heavy naval and air support, including paratroopers, "has received a setback from our allied forces

"fighting in south-eastern Italy.

"German artillery have downed seven aircraft and damaged three steamships.

"This treacherous attack against our country's sacred soil will be crushed

"and the enemy thrown into the sea.

"For the greater glory of our fatherland and its Duce."

Long live Italy!

Oh, baby! Baby!

Where have you been all my life?

All right, that's enough from you. Now sit down!

Can I help it if I like women?

Watch out how you talk to my father!

I'd sit down if I were you! There it is!

I'm in love with you, angel eyes, you and your nice little bum!

Hey, isn't that the siren?

It's an air raid!

The audience is requested to go to the air raid shelter at number 104, 104.

Whose kid is this? Who gave me this little boy?

Please keep calm. Please keep calm.

Hey, Romolo! The chorus girls!

Over here! Over here!

Put that light out!

What time is it?

There I was, sound asleep, if it wasn't for that idiot.

Excuse me. What did you say? "If it wasn't for that idiot"?

What did I say? I don't know.

Speak up. What did you mean by that?

He didn't mean anything by it. I didn't mean anything.

It's unforgivable!

Certain people ought to be ashamed ofthemselves.

Especially now, with our country united as never before on the verge ofvictory, and you still hear defeatist remarks!

Shame on you!

Fascist Italy. The Duce.

They're your only hope.

And we must win. Yes.

And we will win. Right.

Do you want a cigarette?

Smoke ruin my voice. No very good.

Oh, you sing? Yes.

I learn in my city, Düsseldorf.

Have you been in Italy long?

I been to Roma, Milano, Bergamo, Como.

This Hans, oldest son.

What do you want?

This is my husband in Russia, Wehrmacht.

You come rest a little with me?

My boarding-house is very near.

They won't bomb us as long as the Pope's in Rome.

Good night, Anita.

Might as well say good morning.

What's that booming? My God, do you hear that?

Mother of God! They're bombs!

Help! Help!

We're being bombed!


Alberto's house has gone! The babies! The babies!

Help! Help!

Can I shoot a bit of it?

Go ahead, ifyou like.

A perfectly preserved mammoth's tusk.

We discovered it during construction ofthe Piazza Re di Roma station.

The Capitoline Museum has already asked for it.

Shall we go down? This way, please.

I could've used the subway trying to cross town this afternoon.

I wish they'd finish it.

What was that?

The ground beneath Rome is unpredictable.

Every hundred metres, we come across some important find.

Naturally, this slows up the work.

This is a very difficult contract.

We merely wanted to resolve the traffic problem with a subway like Munich's or Dublin's but here the ground has eight strata and we're forced to become archaeologists.

The first time the necessity of a subway for Rome was discussed was in 1871.

You mean 1971. No, exactly a hundred years ago.

Roman bureaucracy is even more unpredictable than Roman soil.

The paperwork which has passed between ourselves and the community of Rome is enough to fill the entire length of subway.

Right now we're passing beneath the Appio Quarter.

Agenore! Agenore, what's that?

My God, it's an earthquake!

Agenore! Oh, my God! My God!

The buildings overhead began to crack.

Are we coming to the end? I don't think so.

Hey, look at this, will you?

Looks like a big cork stuck in the end ofthe tunnel.

Where are we now?

Beneath the Appia Antica, near San Sebastiano Gate.

To your left you can hear the roar of a genuine underground river.

It emerges about ten kilometres from here at a place called "Cessati Spiriti."

What did he say? He said the noise comes from a river.

When will the whole thing be completed?

I don't know.

Michael, look!

How many hours do they work down here?

Ten hours straight, I think.

At this point, we had to change course again.

On the left you can see a necropolis with 400 skeletons.

Third strata.

Track 22!

Rinaldo, the current in the right channel has gone down!


Sir, I think we've run into another hollow spot.

It's been showing on the gauge for two days.

Do they sleep down here? I think they do.

We've got to suspend the work again, sir.

What's happened? Come have a look at the gauge.

Take the flame cutter to number three.

We've got a hollow spot as big as the Alban Hills!

What is it, Amirildo? Don't you feel well?

I don't know what it is.

Ragu, the right wheel!

The right wheel, Ragu!

Hey! Stop the drill!

It goes like this. Now we know there is an open space on the other side.

The archaeologists will make us suspend work for a couple of months.

It could be a cavern or some catacombs.

We could try testing the wall very carefully in different spots.

Start up the cutter.

Stop the cutter. Stop the cutter!

Michael, look! There are Roman paintings! Frescoes! They're fantastic!

Down this way, sir.

A Roman house from 2,000 years ago.

Michael, look at their faces.

Keep your mask on.

It's as ifthey were staring at us.

Look! Aim the light down there!


Hey! Look at this! What's happening?

The frescoes are fading.

It's the air from outside.

The fresh air is destroying the frescoes.

Oh, no! How awful!

Michael! What can we do? We've got to do something.

Do something!

For these disenchanted youngsters, huddled together like puppies, making love is not a problem.

They might do it, or they might not.

But it certainly isn't as complicated as it once was for us when our amorous yearning led us to the nearest brothel.


Come on, move!

All right, stop messing around like yobs just out of prison.

Go and screw your grandma!

Where are you going? How old are you? Show me your ID.

Let's go! Move it! Upstairs!

Come on, who's going to be first?

Come on! Come on! Can't you see the tongue she's got on her?

Come on, boys, make up your minds! You too, Gramps.

What's the matter? Are you all asleep on your feet?

All right! Enough ofthis shit!

Pretty soon I'm going to turn off the lights and kick everyone out!

Have you got blood in your veins or water?

Every one ofthese girls is an artist. Are you guys blind?

Now get your asses upstairs. All right, let me by. Let me by.

Let's go upstairs, girls. Come on.

Come on, boys. The young ladies are all here.

Teresa! Where the hell's my coffee?

It's coming. I already ordered it.

You wanna come with me, yes or no? Come on, come on, soldier boy.

I don't want to sleep by myself. I don't want to sleep by myself.

Hey, Rita, turn around.

I wouldn't take you even ifyou gave me food for a month.

Why don't you go take the next train back to Naples, fuckface?

Come on, honey!

Ifyou wanna stand there and jerk off, then go home and do it.

What kind of men are you?

Ifyou keep waiting, it's going to drop offfrom old age and not even the cat will eat it then.

It's closing time.

They're all pretty and they're real artists!

Is Dolores back? She went to have a bite to eat.

Who's going to come upstairs with the pride of Florence?

That's a good boy.

Look! Those tits must weigh 40 pounds each.

Shut your fucking trap!

What's an ugly, skinny bitch like you doing in a nice place like this?

So why'd you go upstairs, then? Just to make fun of a working girl?

Two. I've got a good mind to call the cops.

I'll throw you down the stairs three at a time, you bastards.

Come on! Come on. Come on. Come on.

There she goes again. Every time it rains, she gets hysterical.

Marcella. Watch out for her nails. All right. Who's my next victim?

You thieving bitch.

Nives, calm down. Wanna come upstairs, handsome?

Let's go. Let's go.

Shut up. Tonight you can pack up and get out.

Two monkeys!

Let the lady by! What is this shit?

Think you're a bloody cop, do you? Don't shove me around.

Ladies, up to your rooms, please.

All right, gentlemen. Everybody out, please. Out.

The ladies are going to eat.

We're closing.

Turn offthe lights. We're closed.

Go get some fresh air. We're closed. Everybody out.

All right! Time to go home.

Everybody out. Time to go home!

All right, buster! Cut it out. I'm not your sister.

Who knows why, why we live And why the fuck we die

But there were also some very sophisticated houses which would make your heart beat in fear and excitement.

Sit down, sit down.

What's the matter? What's everybody so quiet about? This won't do at all.

Come on, who wants to come up to my room for a game of chess?

How are you, darlin'? Don't you love me today?

This morning I woke up feeling aroused. OK, gents, who's going to be first?

Here I am.

I can't wait to get back to my room. Let's not waste any time.

Come on!

Babies, are you afraid of mama? Last chance, gents.

I'm off. I'm going up to bed. Last chance, gentlemen.

I'm all on fire! I'm all on fire!

Where the hell do you think you are? It's not your home.

All I want is one good man.

Come on! I'm Spanish and hot.

Come on, men, move it!

Come on!

Oh, my babies, shame on you!

Who nailed your feet to the floor? Dad! See if I've got something in my eye.

Where's my nice little sailor? Who's going to ride my ship?

Where's my nice little sailor?

I'm so excited, I can't even think straight!

Take anyone you want. Come on and quit pretending.

I've seen you here before, stupid.

Gentlemen, shame on you for keeping all these beautiful ladies waiting.

All clear! All clear!

But I have to leave.

No, you don't, not yet. I'm not losing my job on account ofyou.

Damn it! Some bigwig, I bet.

Gentlemen, please remain where you are and don't leave the room for the next five minutes.

Thank you.

I see.

Ladies, upstairs to your rooms, please.

Hurry up, please. Thank you.

Who's arrived, the mayor? Who knows? Maybe it is.

Maybe so, l don't know I don't know, maybe so

Experience, my dear. That's what counts in life.

Ifyour son's experienced, he'll never have any problems.

I think that dark guy wants you.

But if he's not experienced all he'll get is a royal screwing, right?

It's so true. Dolores is always right.

Not always, no.

You are very beautiful, you know.

Where are you from?

Santa Maria la Bruna.

Where's that? Near Pompeii.

Is that your son? Yes, that's my son.

But you... How long have you...?

Two years.

Listen, I mean, how did you happen to...

What the hell. I found myself alone, and Assuntina said, "Come with us.

You'll like it, you'll see. I'll introduce you."

Lace me up?

To tell the truth, I can't complain.

The signora likes me and I've got everything I need.

Does that mean you wouldn't want to leave this place?

To do what?

Haven't you ever fallen in love? Haven't you ever met someone...

Sure I have. And this is the result.

Listen. Couldn't we see each other sometime?

Do you ever go out?

Some morning, whenever you want, we could go to the beach for lunch.

Really, I'd like to take you out.

Let's make a date.

Tomorrow, OK? The day after tomorrow?

Perhaps you have heard of Princess Domitilla.

Her mother Fabiola, her grandfather Eugenio and her ancestors further back were all born in this palazzo where today Domitilla lives alone.

Salvatore! Domenico!

Can't you hear the carriage? He's arrived.


At last.

Your Eminence! Thank you. Thank you so much.

Princess Domitilla! There. There.

How nice it is to see you all again.

Good evening.

I hope you are all well, with the grace of God.

You must be Francesca, is that right?

Yes, I'm Francesca, Your Eminence.

Ah, my eyes aren't what they used to be.

And is this little rascal still causing his mother trouble?

It's not true. How can you say that?

But of course, I was only joking. Well, isn't it little Filippo!

Remember when you used to drink the wine out ofthe ampullae?

And who are these little devils? Augustarello's children, eh?

How do you do? We've already met.

I gave you your first Communion.

This little blond boy I've never seen.

What's your name? Giulio.

Are you good? I bet only when you're asleep.

And now offto bed, eh?

Good night, children, and God bless you.

Good night, Your Eminence.

IfYour Eminence will come this way.

My friends! Please sit down.

Ah, yes, why, even today there was an audience with people who want to tell the Pope how to run the church.

What can you do? Be patient, I suppose.

"Fire's for burning and patience for learning" as we say in Rome.

I remember your grandfather. He was a good man, Don Eugenio.

My compliments.

Please! Please!

My friends.

Please sit down. Thank you.

Peppino, Gervasio, you may begin serving.

Ah, you've finally arrived!

What would you like, Your Eminence?

A mint to freshen my mouth, thank you. Ah, a mint. I knew it.

Here we are.

Your Excellency. Why not?

Thank you. I'd love one.

What would you like, Monsignor? Monsignor.

I must tell you that when I was little, I was quite a mischief maker.

What did he say?

He said when he was young, he was a rascal.

Mama used to make a liqueur just like this for the guests and she would have to hide it from me.

The minute she wasn't there, I'd climb up and drink it out ofthe bottle.

Your Eminence, I can't believe it.

I'm sure that even as a baby, you were a saint.

A long life to His Eminence.

How much time has passed.

Everything seems so far away, so different.

I'm sorry to leave this life in a city which is no longer home.

The Rome l knew was different.

People were nicer, more respectful.

Everyone knew everyone else.

Monsignors, cardinals, the Pope.

They were all either friends or relatives.

Friendship with the church has been lost.

The marvellous balls in villas and palazzos with all those cardinals dressed in red wandering about the house.

It was like living in a painting and at Christmas.

Now, why should I suddenly remember that?

The little presents Monsignor Altieri would give me.

Wax statuettes, crosses out of woven straw and a lot of velvet for the toy manger.

And all of it gone, lost over the years.

Who knows where all those little wax statues have gone?

For the following presentation of ecclesiastical fashions, we welcome His Eminence and our other illustrious guests.

Model No. 1: habit in black satin, along traditional lines, for novices.

The same model may be done in another type offabric such as silk or wool, according to the season.

The boots are in leather and suede in two colours.

Navy blue and black for harsher climates.

Model No. 2: tourterelle immaculée.

Starched cap with flexible wings.

Useful also for interiors with poor air circulation.

Model No. 3: little sisters ofthe purgatory's temptation.

The world must follow the church and not vice versa.

And now for the more casual modes: quicker to paradise!

Here you have Model No. 6 for country priests.

Sacristan variations for first-class ceremonies.

The sacerdotal vestments have passed through evolution:

Anitto, viviale cotta, vianita and casula.

All types ofvestments are made today ofvery light fabrics in the most brilliant colours, which don't fade.

One, two, three, go!

Balloons! Balloons! All colours and shapes.

First he has a drink before he eats an egg, then he has a drink while he's eating the egg, and now he wants a drink because he's eaten an egg!


Won't he get sick from all those eggs?

Balloons for you. For children and for grown-ups too.

What the hell do you want? Go on, it's red!

They're making their movie all over the place but not paying anybody.

This pork's from genuine Ariccia pig! How about a slice?

"Rooky" here! "Rooky" here! "Leal" silk! "Pletty sirk scalf!"

"Pletty sirk scalf."

Hey, Brit, do they sell pork sandwiches in Germany?

Leave Grandpa alone! Let him sleep. Why bring him along?

Hey, Torquato! Some petrol!


Antique paintings. Fancy frames!

Very cheap!

I'm going back to the cemetery tomorrow. Fancy coming?

They gave him a nice spot. Really sunny!

Hey, you bystanders, where are you going?

Why don't you eat here?

Hey, young man, where are you going to feed her?

Your wife! Well, come on over then and buy her a decent meal for a change.

Checco! It stinks like hell over here!

Did you have to give us a table next to the manhole?

It's not true! That's the smell of history, honey, centuries.

You shit! You shit! I'll slit your belly open.

You always believe everything that dumb bitch tells you?

There! It's Gore Vidal, the American writer. Let's ask him.

Good evening, Mr Vidal.

Do you mind if we disturb you forjust two minutes?

Well, you ask me why an American writer would want to live in Rome.

First of all, because I like the Romans.

They don't give a damn whether you're dead or alive.

They're neutral, like the cats!

Rome is the city of illusions.

Not only by chance, you have here the church, the government, the cinema.

They each produce illusions like you do and like I do.

As the world dies from overpopulation...

Yes, by Americans.

...too many cars, poisons.

And what better city than Rome, which has been reborn so often?

What place could be more peaceful to wait for the end from pollution and overpopulation?

It's the ideal city for waiting to see if it will really come to an end or not.

To the end!

Get out! Clear the piazza!

Why? We weren't bothering anybody!

Hurry up! Move! Move! Move!

Ifyou don't mind, I would like to say this - despite the recent and incredibly permissive laws which protect the guilty man more than the innocent, the restraining measures of our police force are successful in keeping at an acceptable minimum the outbreak of delinquency in a city, or in a society, where protest movements, drugs and a desire for wealth are actually regarded as legitimate goals.

They were minding their own business. You have no right to beat them!

I'm a witness! Have you gone mad? I'm a teacher, I'll have you know.

They've turned our piazzas and monuments into a rubbish dump.

Right! All they think about is sex.

Don't worry, madam. They're not really hurting them, believe me.

He's beating the hell out of him! He's killing him.

Belt him one! You clowns!

Are you fighting or dancing? I think they're engaged.

You're nobody! You're nobody!

You're just a lucky bastard, that's all!

He's a champion! He could kill all ofyou.

He's a real champ!

The camera. Somebody swiped the camera!

Somebody stole the camera!

This lady you see walking home along the wall of an old patrician palazzo is an actress from Rome, Anna Magnani.

In a way, she's a symbol ofthe city itself.

What am I?

Rome: she-wolf and vestal virgin, noblewoman and fishwife, sombre and festive.

I could go on until tomorrow morning.

You'd better go home and get some sleep, Federico!

Can I ask you a question? No, I don't trust you. Ciao!

Good night.