Shiki-Jitsu (2000) Script

Studio kajino presents once upon a time returning to my hometown

the 1st day 30 days remain

Do you sell cigarettes?

We don't carry them I'm sorry

Out of cigarettes?



Ritual It's a ritual

Oh, before? By the tracks?

Yes, I was performing a ritual Oh... sorry I intruded then

What's it for?

It's a secret!

Do you know what tomorrow is?

No Tomorrow's my birthday ritual the 2nd day 29 days remain

I'm still swirling It's a dark, lonely place I thought you could maybe rescue me somehow, I still feel that way Unsure what to do I'm moved by the scent of rain Thanks for those smokes And...

Happy Birthday No!

Tomorrow's my birthday

the 3rd day 28 days remain

The simple act of pursuing her was sufficient Having reached an impasse in my work and in myself, I sought to acquaint myself with everyday ennui, sired by apathy and restlessness Ever-fleeing the authenticity of my own experience, I was entirely spent by a life, composed of accumulated fictions

Um... are you always alone?

Not today Yesterday?

Not really Tomorrow?

I'd rather not be

I'd rather not be alone either say, do you know today's date?

Monday Yesterday?

Sunday Tomorrow?

Tuesday Did you perform your ritual today?

Yes It will make my wish come true Your wish?

When my wish comes true, I can disappear completely Disappear, leaving nothing in the world behind That's why I have to keep performing the ritual Until then, the red umbrella protects me

say, what's tomorrow?

Can't you figure it out?

Tomorrow is my birthday And so...

I'd rather not be alone the 4th day 27 days remain



Why did you follow me, that first day?

Why are you following me now?

Well... because you intrigue me Same here, then

This your place?



My unsound heart and the consuming loneliness of longing for someone Perhaps anyone will do As long as that someone will love me constantly, ceaselessly, it will suffice

“Is this true love?”

“I feel at ease with you”

“We're compatible” I ponder such ideas everyday Sick Dad and Morn are sick Everybody's sick And I'm... sickest of all

What's wrong?

Maybe I shouldn't have come It's not that No one's stood there before...

I mean, it's unusual So I felt strange Strange? Do I look weird?

No, not at all You look just right Like my room?

Probably I like it Because only my favorite things are here

Including me?

Yup You're one of the gang I'm OK here I like coming back here

I'm home, mother

Listen, your sister...

You listening?

She never listened to her mother It's too late for regrets now!

Listen to me, or you'll end up like your sister!

Both of you share that man's blood Guess it's hopeless I've had it! Where are you!

Not with that man again I won't stand for it!

Will you ever...

Pick up the phone and call me!

All right, all right, I get it I worked myself to the bone to raise you and now you abandon me At least your sister had a heart How infuriating!

Listen, you keep up this selfish behavior and you'll pay for it I swear you will You, you, you...

How dare you talk to me that way Your father tortured me, doing whatever he wanted And now my own daughter hates me so much!

What's the point of living...

I'll get out of the hospital tomorrow, and it's your birthday, too Please Won't you come home Sure

Know what tomorrow is?

Probably, your birthday, right?

That's right So let's play together again I don't want to be alone on my birthday

the 5th day 26 days remain

What are you doing?

Rainy days are days for my father and sister They're both dead And tomorrow's my birthday...

No doubt for her, the truth is only an enemy that wounds her The days of her life pass in loneliness, a darkness without exit I longed to ease her sadness and anxiety, if only a little Even if only to atone for my own past

Can I be with you?


Know what tomorrow is?

Tomorrow's your birthday

the 6th day 25 days remain The time is

5:59 AM and

30 seconds

The time is

5:59 AM and

40 seconds

The time is

5:59 AM and

50 seconds

The time is exactly


The time is

6AM and 10 seconds

Good morning!

I'm going to give you a tour of my house First, this is, the secret 4th floor And this...

This is Lucy

The secret...

3rd floor

And this is...

the secret

2nd floor

And this is... the secret

1st floor

There's a basement No!

That's absolutely secret! You can't go in there!

And this is... the secret

5th floor And this is

the secret What?

6th floor And this is the secret

7th floor!

Why are they all secret?


They're our secret And finally...

This is the secret roof!

These... stairs... I'm beat

Getting old...

You like high places?

Not really I do Sometimes, I come here to check Check what?

That I'm still OK

The sky is pretty The stars are pretty The moon is pretty The light is pretty If I don't exist, everything's pretty Maybe it's better if I didn't exist How about my blood?

Maybe it's pretty

Maybe I'll look

See, I'm still OK I didn't let go Still OK to be alive

A blank-faced mosquito falls A huge mosquito Much, much bigger than I It slumps and is still A much larger creature caught it and took flight, the mosquito in its grasp It flew up and passed right over me But it released its grasp and the mosquito fell Still blank It drifted down, down, down

What's that?

The inside of my head Such an interesting head It's your turn to talk About what?

Something Something, huh Anything I want to hear you talk

You know fireman?

No Well, when I was a kid, he was like UltraMan His enemies attack him and in the end, he dies He ignites So he dies fireman ends up burning He yells “Fire!” but actually he's afraid of fire...

Maybe he's fireman 'cause he burns But that wasn't what you wanted I don't really get it, but it's interesting That's what she says, but I wonder...

Actually, all she wanted was to hear someone's voice Actually, all she wanted was to stop feeling lonely

Know what tomorrow is?

Your birthday, right?

Echoes from the creaking arcade roof opening and an all too ordinary sky disturbed my ease

Can I see you tomorrow?

If I'm still alive the 7th day 24 days remain

You like cars?

Not so well as boats and trains, but well enough I like 'em Cars Why?

Because my big sister did

Where were you?

I was back at the hotel getting my things That stuff No, I mean where were you 'til now I took my usual route here, the bookstore, department store, and the toy store today No I mean where were you before you came here!

Oh... Tokyo

Why'd you come?

What? I wanted to think things over I was kind of tired Tough time?

Well, there was a lot going on But really, it was all about nothing You're just like my mother Mother always said life is full of tough times

Must be a wrong number No cell phone calls today?

Yeah, the deal's already done

What are you doing?

What? Nothing...

My usual work exhausts me So I'm keeping my distance

Actually, I wanted to make live action films, too Live action films, films Films?


Why don't you? Why not? You should From now on, you're “Director” I'll call you Director Director...

Cut it out Cheers I want blue, the blue one This? This blue?

Ready, go Hey, you cheated It stopped

Say, say say, Know what tomorrow is?

Tomorrow? Tomorrow's your birthday

You got that right, Director the 8th day 23 days remain

I'm still OK today

I'm finished

Yes, yes, I start shooting today but there's no telling...

Yes, yeah

An outline by...

Reel 1

Rolling I'm rolling I'm shooting you

Say something

She seems to have escaped

Does my outfit look OK?

Is it right for the film?

Sure, I think it looks fine I don't know much about clothes

I'm not up on clothes It's cute

Are you shooting...

It's moving


Happy on the train?

Happy on the train with you

I've never been here

The unknown Yeah, it's exciting The streetcar is a perfect means of escape from the tedium of my days The scenery flows by cinematically The sound effects are punctual My fantasy about her expands I won't be bored for some time Our idle routine, the days I spend with her, like a lukewarm bath, her faint smile, all seem to agree with me Each day, a countdown towards death I dare not risk negligence All the more reason to film her, I think Images, especially animation, simply embody our personal and collective fantasies, manipulating selected information, and fictional constructs Even live-action film, recording actuality, does not correspond to reality Conversely, reality, co-opted by fiction, loses its value

“The inversion of reality and fiction” None of this matters to me anymore My consciousness, my reality, my subject, all converge in her Certainly, she longs to escape into fantasy Certainly, I long to escape from fantasy I wanted to keep a visual record of these contradictory phenomena But, my behavior is really no more than an excuse for my inability to communicate except through images

This is the way to the mystery basement No trespassing Because the camera is prohibited, I cannot show you anymore Your pardon Outside circumstances force me to omit the 1st through the 7th floors

Next, the roof

So, this is the roof Wow, it's high...

This is where she always checks herself You know what tomorrow is?

Yeah, your birthday, right?

Each day, she postpones the morrow, by transforming today to yesterday A typical day in her life the 9th day 22 days remain She never goes to sleep before dawn But awakening before 6AM, she dials and listens to the time As far as I can tell, she hardly sleeps at all

You'll die Hey , go to sleep!

Aren't you sleepy? Don't you want to sleep?

I'm scared to sleep When I close my eyes and sleep, something really heavy seems to crush my head I push it away and away and away, but it keeps bearing down I can't avert my eyes And so I don't sleep I faint But I like tomorrow coming Because tomorrow...

You know what tomorrow is?

Your birthday, right?

Terrified to face the truth, she rejects even sleep Not that there is actual truth in the ambiguity of human memory Her best and only means of survival depends on her destruction and renewal of memory Certainly many more days bear forgetting than joyful commemoration What is it that I want from her?

You'd better get some sleep You're shooting again tomorrow... the 10th day 21 days remain Again, today, I record her image Because I find in the act of capturing her being according to my own will, for my own purpose, relief from my own life Images transform my real past into fiction Each of us edits and alters our memories By giving form and existence to this process through images, I reinvent my past, whitewashing it, into an idealized history Re-creating the present as something invulnerable, as a world of fiction and fantasy We are the same Only our methods differ

Look what I found

What's that, throw it away Do you read this stuff too?

No I don't I don't Liar I am not Why not?

Well, I read the softer stuff You do read it Disgusting Like Playboy, or whatever

“Females drowning in their lust, coming wherever they please...” Don't read it

“Normal sex doesn't do it” Stop it

“The nymphomaniacs who lust for kinky settings” Cut it out It's embarrassing

Throw it away It's dirty

You like this stuff too

What can I say It says, vavoom


You like it No, they're too big You do like it

Do you like sex?

Well, all men like sex And you, Director?

Well, the Director neither likes nor dislikes...

I don't dislike it...

So you do like it I don't like it

'Cause if you do, you're no more than male and female Just like everybody else So I hate it!

I really hate it!

A Kumoha 42 street car The type: 20 meters with driver's seat Two doors and benches on either side Semi-cross seats perpendicular to the floor Street car color, Grape #2 Capacity 104, 68 sitting, 36 standing Weight: 45 tons Built in 1933 These two cars are the only ones of this type still operating in Japan Wait a minute

Hello Yeah, in Ube Yeah, I'm shooting I can't tell whether it's any good or not I'll email you an outline when I'm done Tell me what you think Yeah, sounds good Sure It's from a woman again Dirty Director!

No, it's not like that Lucky you At least once a day you get to talk to someone It's not like that I don't care who it is At least someone calls you

Want it?

Give it back


That night, her smile disappeared with the falling rain

Hey, you OK?

I'm coming in

It'll rain tomorrow It'll rain tomorrow

What are you doing!

Tomorrow's my birthday!

The 11th day 20 days remain

Today is my father and sister's day I like rainy days Because when it rains, all the merry people in the world finally walk with their eyes downcast That's why I like rain!

The rain she loves What she keeps bottled up on sunny days, flows as from a broken darn when it rains Her feelings of loneliness Sorrow These emotions elevate her, preventing her from engaging in a certain behavior And... engendering her complex reactions to the phenomenon called rain What is the sadness that she harbors?

No doubt the deaths in her family In this moment I acknowledge yet again, that in her heart, she yearns to cease existing the 12th day 19 days remain A brand new morning's here A morning of hope Open your heart with joy Look up at the sky Open your vibrant heart to the song on the radio to the fragrant breeze NOW, 1, 2, 3...

I'm OK again today

Having something to hold onto when you're scared is good enough in itself

And this is my secret ritual space It always has to be flooded It's a really sacred place

But as of today, it's open The Director can come and go Video camera OK

Not the other one?

This one's cooler An umbrella here Umbrella

Don't you need it?

As of today... this What's that?

A videocamera Matching Did you ever have fun?

A hesitant reply isn't a good sign, is it?

OK then...

A favorite place?

Favorite place... This sort of place isn't bad...

I loved the desert The desert?

Desert A simple place with only sand and sky Really beautiful But it was beautiful because it was unpopulated No humans there to warp it A beautiful world without people That sounds lovely Like railroad tracks?

What? Yeah Why?


How shall I put it... Because they are mechanical And then rails are fixed, right?

As long as you ride them you needn't choose a path Perhaps that's a relief And you?

I like them Why?

Because these two rails will never come together And yet, the two are one That's why!

They left me Abused and then abandoned I tried everything but my fear made me tremble The magical powers of a pair of dice still sway me undiminished If only one day I could say I'm so glad I met you I hum to myself

My umbrella! My umbrella!

If I died in your place How would the skies part How would the wind flow

Beneath the steps of that dark red space you used that sharp stick and struck my bursting... over and over...

It's no good, I can't write Hopeless Maybe time to give it up What'll I do if I quit What do you think I'd...

Oh, sorry I'll call you back Hey, what are you doing?

The 13th day 18 days remain

Today, she didn't venture near the roof, or to the railroad tracks She never attempted to leave the room

Tomorrow's my birthday Tomorrow's my birthday

Be happy Be happy

She never discussed what frightened her, what she wanted to escape She no longer saw anyone but herself I no longer exist inside of her That day passed without our exchanging a single word, a single glance, or lifting the camera to shoot For I hadn't the courage to capture her like this Her unrelenting oppressive reality began to bear down on me as well

the 14th day 17 days remain Unbeknownst to me, she had found a cat that day

Look mother, isn't this cat cute?

It's called Jam Look, it's mother, mother Our very, very kind mother Let's say hello to her, Jam

You know what tomorrow is?

Tomorrow... is my birthday the 15th~19th day 16~12 days remain Her ritual remained interrupted Since that day, she hadn't climbed to the roof, or visited the tracks, but played with the cat all day Playing with the cat seemed to allow her to avoid herself She still slept rarely, and now barely ate, only played with the cat Nothing else worth recording took place Except that of course we neither spoke nor exchanged a glance I remained locked outside her Here, Jam!

Why don't you come

the 20th day 11 days remain The cat slipped away that day The photographer's dream The writer's soul The director's obsession The actor's disease Red cheeks Swelling lips Tightened strings The human heart is fragile and is easily captured An evil song drifting through the dark envelopes the girl You can eat this Announcing, My true mother's arrived the girl dances wildly, wildly wildly

She never did come home that day And suddenly I noticed that I was somewhat relieved the cat had gone

the 21st day 10 days remain

Um... the cat?

Mother My mother was inside me I've become my mother

Cut it out!

What are you doing!

Cut it out!

Calm down

Why! Why weren't you with me then!


Calm down!

Calm down!

It's your sound

It's beating away

A gentle sound...

I've never heard it before...

Don't go anywhere, OK?

Don't disappear like that, OK?

Don't ever leave me alone again, OK?

Promise Because tomorrow's my birthday

Sure... OK

You have to be with me on my birthday Forever and ever, OK?

What are you thinking?

What? Oh, sorry

the 22nd day 9 days remain

For real!

Hey, hey, Wake up! Wake up!

It's past 6

No... hold on...

Don't climb

Up We go



Your heart says I'm OK

There... there...

Which line today?

Amusement park

I can handle this

Sorry, there's someone scary

Director! Monkeys!

Monkeys and goats

I made a huge discovery this morning

Guess what I'm not scared to fall asleep anymore Just because you were with me, I could close my eyes just like that And like, I wasn't scared at all Nothing came crashing down

Actually, my body felt really light I could just sleep This is amazing!

This is really amazing Do you understand what this means?

Amazing discovery!


Great angle The Wind's not so bad when I lie like this You're right

Cuddling is nice, isn't it I like it Yeah In a way, I like this better than that Don't believe you No, really Huh, well then, what do you like about it?

That it's warm It's warm...

For me, when I wake up in the middle of the night, you're beside me Your face is right there It's so reassuring Amazing, isn't it?

I know what you mean But your mouth's always wide open and you drool You... fool!


Can you make it?

All these used tires look like people's ex-teeth

Let me shoot too OK? I want to shoot, too No, it won't be my film anymore Who cares, c'mon Let me, let me

This? This OK? Is it working?

Give it back Say something Don't shoot me Why are you upset?

I'm not upset Liar It's true Do I look upset?

You do I am not upset

I wonder...

I'm tired lately Tired?

Huh, I see So what!

Want me to mother you?

Yes, please OK, good boy, good boy I'll mother you more

Will you mother me then?

I want a piggyback Piggyback?

Yeah, piggyback For real?

A two-shot

I'm dizzy Dizzy

Know what tomorrow is?

Sure That's right, tomorrow's my birthday Tomorrow's my birthday Tomorrow's my birthday

Tomorrow's my birthday!

The 28th day 3 days remain

It's nearly a month since I met her I'm fed up with the endless “yesterdays,” and lulled by the “todays” Anxious, too, that tomorrow may bring change yet eagerly awaiting the change it may finally bring What do I want from this reality I share with her?

The constancy of the past or the change of the future However, these were no more than idle doubts that shifted with my moods

You snore every night Sounds just like a hedgehog These days will come to an end Eventually, I'll part with her Even my life will end one day All the more reason to treasure these slight, fleeting emotions But the excess of boredom and the excess of intimacy were simply exhausting me And I realized that gradually the times that being with her depressed me, outstripped the times that I enjoyed it

Someday that'll happen to me

You know, today, there was this blue car in front of the shrine, and this car, you know, was really cute...

Hey, you listening? You listening?

I've gotten really good Oh, it stopped

I'm off to the store

He hates me?

Hates me?

He hates me Hates me, hates me, hates me!

I'll be left alone again I'll be left alone again They left me Abused and then abandoned I tried everything but my fear made me tremble The magical powers of a pair of dice...

...still sway me

If only one day I could say I'm so glad I met you I hum to myself

Listen, your sister...

You listening?

She never listened to her mother It's too late for regrets now!

Listen to me, or you'll end up like your sister!

Both of you share that man's blood Guess it's hopeless I've had it! Where are you!

Not with that man again I won't stand for it!

Shut up, clueless!

You're so patronizing!

All you ever want is for me to be grateful!

Always, always, always You're just patronizing me!

You don't even have a clue what it is I really want! Not a clue!

How dare you!

You only remember what you gave me, but not how you mistreated me Right?

Or what, we're even-steven for all your troubles?

Go ahead and die! I won't care!

Shut up, shut up, shut up!

Why were you nice to me then?


Why don't you answer

Why don't you answer

Her heart is overcome by a world awash in cruelty, harshness, hatred and loneliness But that is the way of the world Each of us fears its absurdity, and curses it And yet, the world is immeasurably vast, and gentleness, mercy and empathy linger in our hearts I desperately wanted her to know this reality as well Hello...

Hey, there What's wrong

But her heart is so delicate, so vulnerable Am I really capable of embracing the endless darkness inside it?

Perhaps I'm incapable of accepting her...

I find myself enveloped in an anxiety I cannot shake Today, again, I can do nothing the 29th day 2 days remain

6 in the morning, she's back to her usual self She's returned to her little world constructed entirely of her protections, denying the existence of whatever can harm her Except now she has chosen to rely on me Yeah, it always sounds good She begins another day of life, brimming with fantasy, plastered in self-deception, sealed by oblivion My own faint panic, “I've got to do something” is futilely idle

What are you doing?

Nothing, work

Let's go outside then

Shoot your movie, that's your job, right?

Is that work?

It is your job

In Japan today, all forms of expression, beginning with images, serve only as either time-killing entertainment for those without occupation, or as momentary respite for those who are afraid of pain People desire either real scandals amplified into rawness, or, the illusion of beautifully adapted fictions It is true of me Unable to create appropriate relationships I escape into a fictional world, constructed on a fantasy of daily life Even this film, when completed, will become a device to deliver a certain amount of stimulation devoid of surprises, and a measure of time spent in peace Who wants images beyond that? Who needs them?

By then, I had abandoned her as a visual construct I didn't want to film anything As long as she was present, I didn't need to make a film I had always been entranced with the idea of being madly loved, and loving madly And yet this was a stupendous burden, exhausting Could I really bear it?

Long time...

So you were back

Hey, wait!

Wait, dammit!

What's that about?

I gotta go

Hey, don't bother I said wait! Hey, hey!

Give it back, I know you've got it Hey! You do, right!

No, I'm not my sister!

You're crazy!


You OK?

Hello Sorry about that...

A reunion? Right now?

A toast to his triumphant return!

You forgot, right?

Oh... Sorry, sorry

Where were you?

And you?

Where were you!

With some woman?

No, what are you saying?

I was out drinking with my old friends Liar, liar It's the truth Liar

And where were you Liar!

I'm not lying It's the truth

There's nothing left

Nothing but your heartbeat

Ever kissed someone?

I have

Maybe I haven't ever

Have you ever killed someone?


Maybe In my head

Me too

You want sex?

If I have sex with you, will you stay forever?

Actually, you like it, right?

Much better than cuddling You just put up with that, right?

You want to see and touch my breasts, right?

Then, have sex with me

But don't go anywhere Don't abandon me

I'll do whatever you ask

Don't hate me

Don't start hating me


No, no!

If I do this, I will become my sister...

I'll become my sister!

I'm... Still...

If I died in your place How would the skies part How would the wind flow

Beneath the steps of that dark red space you used that sharpened stick over and over striking my quivering lips swollen to bursting tasting of sorrow and betrayal That song has left me I peer back again and again at that dreamlike state

Oh, hello Sorry, I'll call you back later

Hello How unusual Calling at this hour Cat got your tongue? Hello, hello...

What are you...

Come to bed

You read this?


What'd you think?


It's your movie

Because you have to?

Are you with me because you have to be for work?

No, that's not what I meant Just like my father?

Just like my sister?

Just like my mother?

It doesn't matter if you don't like it Am I worthless?

Do you hate me?

Are you going away?

Tell me you won't Tell me you won't That woman on the phone...

You were just tempted when she called you, right?

What woman? She's nobody...


I can't hear you

I can't hear your heartbeat

There's one answer Two answers

Three answers

How many answers?

What makes you like this...

the 30th day the day before By 6 that morning, she had disappeared

Are you a friend of my sister's? You dating her?

Well, yes, something like that Huh... That girl got a boyfriend...

Oh, sorry I never thought she'd do it Her sister appeared instead Finally, she'd rejected even herself It's none of my business, but be nice to her, OK?

Come to think of it, she always liked this kind of place I feel sorry for her Parents split up when she was young, Father walked out on both of us Wound up dead with the new woman Did it rain on that day?

No, in a fire A fire?

Yes, on her birthday And, your mother?

A streetcar hit her On her birthday, she'd always cry, Why did they leave me?

Our mother was a terrible person She blamed anything bad on someone else It was Dad's fault, that woman's fault, my sister's fault, my fault, the world's fault It never occurred to her the fault might be hers My poor sister She was always compared to me She only heard nagging “Why can't you be like your sister?” It was like she was no good She must have suffered

I wonder how she'll ever learn to like herself

There's someone I'd like to see Corning?

None of your business, butt out You...

New guy, huh... Must run in the family

Listen, out the crap You only show up when it suits you What's with that face? Same as last time?

Seen my cat?

Listen, you...

My cat, my cat, you know, Jam No I don't How the hell would I know?

Liar, liar, liar, liar...

You deny attacking my little sister, too?

What are you talking about? You are her, not her sister No I'm not Your sister went away a long time ago You ranted about killing her I say I'm not You were babbling some crap about how you killed her


You do this to me all the time You ask me to let you stay 'cause you got nowhere else, then you split Now it's about some cat!

You come wandering back ranting about a cat!

Don't mess with me!

Say something!


After all I did for you!

You don't get it, do you!

What an idiot

Don't ever go again

What the...

What the...


Oh, great Being with you makes me crazy Drives me nuts

You're crazy Demented Both of you

Wanna be like your sister Well you already are Sleep around, get knocked up, spitting image of that sister you love Huh!

I'm sick of you both No...



Crazy, right?

HEY, you pulling the same, “Go away” crap on him?


Sister! Sister!

Your sister used to say...

“My own sister scares me” Don't! Don't!

Why does it always have to be so damned dramatic Forget it Give me back the ring, the ring Don't touch me!


How dare you “All I did for you” me!?

You never did a thing yourself!

My sister did everything!

Who do you think you are!

I've had it with you!


Spit it out! You!

Please stop Give back the ring!

Who you callin' stupid! Who doesn't get it!

Calm down Let go!

I've had it!

Go away!

Get out of my life!

Give me a break

Sister, why were you with that guy?

That guy...

After you disappeared, he came after me

Why did you have to go away?

But it's too bad You pretended to like me, but you didn't So God punished you

Be happy Be happy Be happy


Be happy Be happy Be happy

You had a phone call Who?

It was... your mother No...

She's still alive

I gotta kill her

It's not true, 'cause she's dead It's not a lie She's coming to see you tomorrow

Tomorrow? What for?

Don't know... Maybe she's worried about you After all that?

After all...

She calls you all the time Why'd you answer my phone?

Keep out of my business!

I'm sorry But it's what's best for you Liar!

I'm not lying Liar!

Go away! You go away, too!

Don't run away!

I'm not running!

You run away from everything you don't like, and wind up in your own little world Not true!

You just deny anything you don't like Not true!

That's why you want everyone to go away!

Shut up! Cut the crap! You depress me!

Why are you still here? I told you to go...

Because I...

want to be with you

I... like... you...


It's true I like you You're lying just like everybody else I like you


I like you

I like you

I like you

Why are you so nice to me?

I wonder...

Let's go home

When I was little, my mother cursed my father to drive him away Mother's curse came to pass and my father left I tried hard to keep her from driving me away

But she told me Even though she never told my sister It was my birthday

A red umbrella and red shoes

My mother bought them for me when we went shopping together

The first things that weren't my sisters hand-me-downs They matched my mother's But my mother threw them away She called them old She didn't need them When I saw that, I thought, she'll do that to me one day I'm scared of being alone But I'm scared of mother, too

So I cursed everyone to drive them away The curse will come to pass on my birthday So my birthday always has to be tomorrow

But mother didn't go away So I had to kill her in my head, over and over But suddenly, I realized that I had to leave So I began dressing up Tomorrow

would bring my new and happy life

But I don't know

what to do about tomorrow

You never know about tomorrow All we really know, is that tomorrow we'll still be together

What do you say?

Want to try to see your mother?

The 31st day the day

You've been OK?

You've been OK?

Leave me alone

I can't leave you alone But you did

Your own mother leave you alone?

For a long time I left you alone for a long time?

When did I leave you alone?

When did your mother leave you alone?

Ever since I was little, you always left me alone...

You only cared for my sister

Excuse me Did her sister pass away?

Is she still alive?

We are apart, but...

She worries about you, too

She called me the other day We'd been out of touch

I'm sorry, it's not that I left you alone I was so busy thinking...

about myself, that maybe I didn't think about your feelings Maybe I was difficult for a long time Maybe I was no good

Always complaining, always getting angry Maybe I never did anything for you Maybe I only... thought about myself

Maybe I couldn't really love you



I really want you to come home I know it's selfish...

I'm lonely

I know that's selfish of me What about when I was lonely?

What about all those years when I was lonely!

All those...

You couldn't have cared less when I needed your love, but now you're lonely, you come to get me!

I'm sorry, I'm sorry What! After all this time, now you're lonely!

Is that what it is?

That's how it is...

That's how...

When I was lonely, you just ignored me...

Now you...

Pm Go away! asking you, go away!

Just go... Just go...

Just go away, now!

I'm sorry No!

I'm sorry, sorry, sorry I'm sorry I'll be waiting

Just once, won't you come home?

Won't you come home just once? Please I know...

Please come home...

I'm sorry


Wake up from your dream?

Or is this part of your dream?

Are we still dreaming a dream?

But this is our reality... Your reality

Your birthday

will come, on the day you were born

Smile, please smile

Thank you the 32nd day the day after

What day is that?

December 7th My birthday

the red hair I got from my mom braided in two swaying in the wind why, why, I still don't know calmly I stood up scissors in hand and cut off those braids it was a sunny day Shunji IWAI the future had no meaning Ayako FUJITANI I was helpless, had no words Jun MURAKAMI but the scent of the way home it was tender Shinobu OTAKE I can live somebody was laughing Suzuki MATSUO it was a very sunny day Megumi HAYASHIBARA

Chief Executive Producer Yasuyoshi TOKUMA Executive Producer Toshio SUZUKI with no more hair Based on the novel, “TOUHIMU” by Ayako FUJITANI I cut off my arms Cinematographer Yuichi NAGATA Production Designer Yuji HAYASHIDA dancing, with my bloody arms Sound Yasuo HASHIMOTO Kazunori SHIMIZU without you Editor Souichi UENO there was nothing here Costume Designer Sachiko ITO Hair and Make-up Designer lsao TSUGE but only the bright sun Composer Takashi KAKO it was a very sunny day Theme Song “Raining” couldn't even cry Written, composed, performed by Cocco the land had no limit beauty surrounded me I was singing in a white dress the line of people far away I could've cried with a rain like today it was a sunny day the future had no meaning I was helpless, had no words but the scent of the way home it was tender I can live somebody was laughing it was a very sunny day

A Tokuma Shoten Production Producers Nozomu TAKAHASHI Miyuki NANRI

Written and Directed by Hideaki ANNO

beyond the 33rd day unknown