Soul Men (2008) Script

Marcus Hooks and the Real Deal, take 6.

That's three names. You want me to sing the main line?

Oh, yeah, here we go, here we go.

Tonight we take a musical journey south, where the legendary soul band Marcus Hooks and the Real Deal developed their signature sound.

1, 2!

Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh They started out singing for pennies on the street corners of Memphis.

Pull the string And I'll wink at you I'm your puppet Mm-hmm, yeah I'll do funny things If you want me to I'm your puppet

I'm yours To have and to hold Darling, you've got Full control Of your puppet But by 1972, Marcus Hooks and the Real Deal had become one of the biggest R&B acts in the world.

Nothin' like sweet soul music To bring us together They played to sellout houses all over the world.

They'd sold 6 million records and influenced a generation of American musicians.

Dance to the sweet soul music Yahh But that all ended on July 24, 1977, when Marcus Hooks began his solo career with a dramatic concert at New York's Madison Square Garden.

Ladies and gentlemen, Marcus Hooks.


Ooh-ooh-ooh Hey, boy, hi.

Hey, boy, dance.


But while Hooks became a music legend, the journey took a decidedly different direction for former band mates Floyd Henderson and Louis Hinds.

Renowned for their signature dance stylings from their one breakout hit, "Walk in the Park," the duo broke up in 1979.

Citing creative differences and a desire to pursue separate projects.

Back off! Freeze!

Get your hands up! Let me see them!

Oh. Wait. Wait, wait. It ain't... Ohh!

The gun ain't real! Ow! It ain't real! Ow!

I'm just broke, God it!

I ain't tryin' to hurt no!

Watch your damn hands!

Police mother brutality!

While Floyd Henderson...

Come on down to Floyd's Car Wash, where everything is done by hand.

...combined his showmanship with an entrepreneur spirit.

And don't forget about Super Soul Sundays, with a full body wash to guarantee a free rimjob.

Come on. Get your rimjob.

Come get your rimjob.

Come and get your rimjob!

Whatever happened to the forgotten duo...

The Real Deal?

Baby, turn the navigation on.

I hope we can find this place sometime tonight.

He gonna love it there.

They got Craftmatic adjustable beds, clap-on lamps.

Y'all better shut up back there, I'm tellin' you.

I'm gonna reach back there and pop one of them little boys upside the head so bad.

I think that's it, Uncle Floyd.


Now, I can't believe I let you talk me into this bullshit.

What you talking about? It's beautiful. You don't like this?

It's a death camp.

Oh, how is it a death camp, Unc?

We got 36 holes of golf.

Three swimming pools.

You know the ratio of women to men here is 5 to 1, Unc? 5 to 1.

That mean you got 'em everywhere.

You can't even move. There's women...

Every time you look around, women crawling between your legs, arms, anything.

I mean, damn, Unc. And if you're worried about the business, I got that.

You taught me everything you know.


Yeah. You know something, son?

You're real crafty.

Appreciate that.

See, first you move into my house.

Then you take over my business.

Aw, man, I ain't taking... Oh, yeah.

Then you move me all the way out to the Valley, man, so can't nobody hear me scream. Right?

Actually, that's why we're moving you here.

So the nurses can hear your ass scream.

You remember you fell on that floor for three days and couldn't nobody hear you. I remember.

Yeah. Now, stop being bitter, man. Enjoy yourself, Unc.

There are your golden years, player.

Now, come on in the house and say bye to Charlene and the kids.

Fuck them kids.

Fuck the kids?



Ohhh... yeah, baby. Ohh! Ohh!

Ohh! Oh, give it to me. Give it to me nice and hard.

Oh, ípapi, sil Ooh!

Oh, right there!


Uhh! Ohh!

Ooh. Don't stop, baby.


No, you're not getting away.

Hoo hoo! Hoo hoo!


Uhh! Uhh! Yeah.



How's the hip?



Okay, Mr. Henderson. I'm gonna need you to, uh, stands up, face the window, and bend over the table.

My problem ain't back in that area, doctor.

Look, Mr. Henderson, your sleep problem can be a symptom of a myriad of different conditions, some of which, you know, are... well, you know, back in that area.

I don't like nobody behind me like that, Huds.

I'm telling you, I just don't like nobody playing with my penny. I'll be very gentle.

I'll be in and out before you know it.

Just bend over. There you go.

Hold on, now. Get a good grip.


Just relax.


Sittin' on The dock of the bay Watching the Tiiiiiide Roll away Ooh ooh All right, again, Mr. Henderson, there's absolutely nothing wrong with you.

So take those for insomnia.

Give me a call if anything changes. All right?

All right. Do me a favor.

Stop being so hard on yourself, Mr. Henderson.

Retirement can be a tough transition.

All right?

Okay. Oh, yeah. Hey, listen.

Don't mix those sleeping pills with alcohol unless you want to kill yourself.

Okay. Who's next?

And for those of you in the Southland, tomorrow's gonna be another beautiful day with bright, sunny skies and temperatures into the mid-80s.

A perfect day for some golf.

And that's gonna continue right into next week.

Gorgeous blue skies and sensationally warm.

It doesn't get any better than that.

This just in.

Soul music fans around the globe are mourning the loss of Marcus Hooks.

The legendary singer and songwriter apparently suffered a massive heart attack while performing last night in front of a capacity crowd at Kungstrardgarden Park in Stockholm, Sweden.

His body's being flown home to New York, where a memorial service will be held next week.

The seven-time Grammy Award winner was 63 years old.

I'll do anything for you We're back in just a moment.


Kezian Motors. Can I help you?


Hinds, telephone!

Dealing drugs out of my garage?

Listen, you doing something illegal, I'll find out and send your ass back to prison so fucking fast, it will make your black monkey head spin.

You know, there was a time I would've knocked your teeth down your throat for saying some shit like that to me.

But I'm a changed man.

I'm trying to be all centered and shit.

Now, I could'a called you a unibrow-shaving, pilaf-eating, greasy-ass goat fucker, but I didn't, did I?

Uh-uh. 'Cause I didn't want to hurt your feelings, and I didn't want to piss you off, just like I know deep, deep down inside, you don't want to piss me off, either.

Now, do you? Uh-uh.

Uh-uh. No. Uh-uh.

All right.


Scruffy, Kibbles...

Yeah, this is Louis.

Hey. Mr. Hinds.

It's Danny Epstein calling from New York. How are you today?


Marty's son.

Oh, yeah?

Shit, I ain't seen you since you were in diapers.

Yeah. Well, I assume you heard about Marcus' passing, yeah?

Oh, yeah. I'm crying the tears of a motherfucking clown.

Okay. Here's the thing. VH1 is putting together a farewell tribute at the Apollo, and they got a lot of big names lined up.

And they want Henderson and Hinds to perform, right?

That's right! The Real Deal back together again.

It's a great opportunity.

You talk to Floyd?

I did.

Mr. Henderson is in.


Then I'm out.

Born under a bad sign Been down since I began to crawl If it wasn't for bad luck You know I wouldn't have no luck at all

Hard luck and trouble...

That is disgusting.


I don't believe this. Hmm.



Ohh. Damn!

Ooh. Fuck happened, man?

Hell if I know. I came in, found your ass laying there.

Bullshit. You looked me dead in my eyes.

Man, you recognized me.

I didn't recognize you. You done changed.

I come all the way down here, and, man, you gonna look me in my face and knock me the fuck out? Should've called first.

How the hell I'm gonna call and you ain't got no phone?

What kind of person ain't got no land phone?

Kind of person don't want to get no calls.

You don't even know why I came down to this old fucked-up-the-ass neighborhood.

I talked to little Ep. I know why you're here.

And the answer is no.

Did he tell you we're at the Apollo and they sold out?

Did he also tell you who gonna be there?

Booker T. Jones. Isaac Hayes. Bootsy Collins.


I don't care.

Do it for Marcus.

Fuck Marcus.

Well, do it for me.

Fuck you! Come on, man.

This is our shot. At what?

At a comeback, fool. If we do this shit right, we can get a record deal and get back on the road like we was 30 years ago.

I ain't trying to be like 30 years ago!

I ain't trying to make no comeback.

I'm gone, and I want to stay gone.

Don't make me beg you, man.

Lao-Tzu says, "Free from desire, "you realize the mystery.

"Caught in desire, you see only the manifestations. "

What the fuck that even mean, man?

That means...

get the fuck out.

Well, I guess you don't give a fuck about the money, then, huh?

What money? It's a funeral!

Nobody get paid to sing at no damn funeral!

How much?

40 grand.


No, down the middle.

No, no, no, no, no, No, no, no, no!

That ain't even enough.

What the fuck you mean that's not enough, man?

I got a lifestyle to maintain here.

What kind of lifestyle, man, you filthy motherfucker?

You got a pantry full of dog food. I don't see no dog.

Dog under the bed, nigger! You lucky he ain't attacked your ass when you came in.

You're the dog, motherfucker!

Look, man, what happened to all that fucking money you done saved, man?

Saved? Shit.

I don't remember shit from Watergate to when the space shuttle blew up.

Hmm. Money I saved.

Okay, what about the royalties? I used to get over $30,000 a year off that shit.

I lost my royalties in a poker game. All right?

Poker? Listen here, man.

If you serious about un-assing me from my lavish surroundings here, man, you gonna have to be a little more flexible in your thinking. Say, oh...


Man, you must be higher than a motherfucker.

We always split shit straight down the middle.

Ain't gonna be nothing to split if I don't show up, now, is there?

And I ain't showing up unless I get 60%% % of the proceeds.

You rich anyway, motherfucker.

I seen your little car wash commercials on the TV.

I transferred all my business affairs over to my nephew.

I'm on a fixed income, man. So what?

So your drawers!

That's why that 20 damn thousand dollars look good to me right now. 16!

That's your cut of a 60/40 split.

And those are my terms.

And they're non-negotiable.


Fatherfuck you, man.

You're gonna tell me 60/40.

You don't dictate to me!

I'm Floyd motherfucking Henderson.

You and Marc, I made you and that motherfucker!

You can't sing, hum, or motherfucking skip.

Ain't that a bitch?

Skip on these motherfucking nuts!

You and Marcus, may you rest in shit.

Motherfucker. I'm Floyd fucking Henderson, you Apostle-faced motherfucker!

This motherfucker slams this door in my face one more time...

I'm tired of this motherfucker!

Always had a problem with this bitch.

He ain't nothing. He's ignorant!

Motherfucker's just a idiot.

Chihuahua-head motherfucker, man, sitting up there, always want to tell somebody what to damn do.

He gonna sit there and talk the fool?

Ooh, my blood pressure's high, motherfucker.


Don't let this motherfucker get you like this.




First of all, I clearly want to state this for the record.

And I find this arrangement we got, man, despicable.

But I'm Floyd Henderson. I'm a trouper.

And you know I'd do any doggone thing, man, to see this group get back on its feet, 'cause you know that's the type of motherfucker I am.

But in the meantime, I'm going back to my $600-a-night hotel room, and I'm gonna have me a nice hot bubble bath to wash some of this filth and dirt and grime from this black fucking hole you live in.

Then I'm having me a nice, juicy-ass steak, oh, yeah, the size of your motherfucking back.

Then I'm gonna take me a shit shower and shave.

And I'll be here at 6 a. m.

To take you to the motherfucking airport.

You got me? I don't fly.

And I get up at 8.

My cousin out the penitentiary, I'm gonna have him kill this motherfucker!

Man talk to me like I'm a motherfucking kid.

I ain't no motherfucking kid.

Every time we... we start on the road, he starts in saying the same shit.

Hey! Who's got my lunch?

Who are you?

I'm Phillip Newman, sir, the new intern. You hired me, like, 20 minutes ago.

Chuckles Newman's my uncle.

He's the one that told you... Stop talking.

Very good. I already got a job for you.

Okay? Bing, bang, boom. Look at that.

Yeah. Henderson and Hinds, Marcus' old backup singers, are being real dickheads about this tribute thing...

Oh, my God! Henderson and Hinds! The Real Deal.

They're the only band that got to play three songs on a sing episode of Soul Train.

Don Cornelius was there as a witness, and I got it on VHS.

They don't do that here. All right?

Yes, sir. This is a record label, not a fan club.

I want those two old fucks there on Saturday, and I want you to make that happen.

Got it?

The Real Deal is back, and they not gonna stop us now.


Ohh! Shit.


What the fuck is that, man?

This is a gun.

I never travel through Klan country without one.

You got a problem with that, pops? Yeah, I got a problem with that, man.

The last time I saw that gun, you were pointing at me, and you were shooting it.

Listen here, Floyd. We ain't two old friends out for some Sunday drive down Memory Lane. All right?

Fact is, I can hardly stand the sight of your ass, so you best not to provoke me.

Or what's gonna happen?

There's a lot of empty road between here and where we trying to go.

Where a nigger could disappear and where nobody'd miss his black ass.

Well, let me see that gun.

Let me see it!

Be careful, fool.

You don't think I know how to hold a gun, man?

I'm a member of the NRA, man.


Where's... Now, what's... God damn it!

Oh! Shit!

Damn! Ohh!

Drive! Drive! God damn it it, drive!

Ohh! Help me!


Grab the wheel, fool!

Look out! Now, turn! Turn!


What the hell is wrong with you!

Don't shoot no gun in a car!

You said... The safety wasn't on there.

Safety, my ass!

Safety wasn't...



Negro Retards' Association!

Dumb motherfucker.

What the fuck is that?

R- E-S-P-E-C-T.

Been a long time since we saw our name in lights.

What our name doing up in lights?

We're at the Apollo Theater this weekend.

We ain't been on stage in over 30 years.

Now, the last thing you want to do is stink up the joint. Am I right?

And I got us free dinner to boot.

Man, we sure are lucky I kept these threads.

Do we look good!

Better hope that button don't pop off and kill nobody.

God damn, I wish these pants weren't squeezing my nuts so tight.

Maybe it'll help you hit those high notes.

I don't need help hitting the high notes.

Yeah, right. We'll see. We'll see.

Ha ha! Busting out.

Ladies and gentlemen, tonight, the Flagstaff Motor Inn is proud to present to you back onstage for the first time in nearly three decades the unforgettable sweet soul sounds of...

The Real Deal!


Don't you ever Be sad Lean on me When times are bad When the day comes And you are down In a river of trouble And are about to drown Just hold on I'm coming Hold on I'm coming On my way Your lover When you be cold I'll be your cover Don't have to worry

'Cause I'm here Yeah.

No need to summon me there

'Cause I'm here Yea-ah Hold on I'm coming Yipes!

I'm coming Just hold on I'm coming Just hold on I'm coming Look here. Reach out to me for some satisfaction.

You know, Floyd, all she got to do Is call my name For quick reaction Yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah Ooh! Aah!


Ooh! Ooh, ooh! Ooh!


Lou, Lou, you all right? You all right?

I can't breathe!


Ohh! Keep going. Keep going.

I can't breathe.

Ladies and gentlemen, please forgive us for this technical difficulty.



Fucking eye, man!

I'm sorry, man. I got on these tight slacks!

Well, then, I'll sue your fat ass!

You sue these nuts.

Go on, get on outta here. Jesus!

Take it from the top.

How are we gonna take it from the top?

I'm rewed up to go, man, You can't hardly breathe.

You may need a chest X-ray. I'm good!

Is there a doctor in the house?

I love you, Debbie.

Get off me, Ernest T!

Lou. Lou. Lou. Calm down, man.

Ain't but 12 motherfuckers out here, man.

It's still a audience!

I don't care if it's two or three. It's a audience.

That's what I'm talking about.

Your attitude is fd up.

Same thing that messed us up back in the day.

No. You know what fucked our shit up back in the day?

No. I don't know.

Oh, you know goddamn well what fucked our shit up back in the day.

Oh, I do, huh? Yes, you do!

What fucked our shit up back in the day was you sticking your johnson in my woman!


Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Floyd Henderson.

This fool is Louis Hinds.

We are The Real Deal, and that's for real.

I want to thank you for being a super audience here tonight.


I'm sorry I hit you, Debbie. Come back.

Shut the fuck up, or I'll knock your dick in the dirt.

Drunk son of a bitch.


Happy Hey, Louis, are we gonna talk about last night, or we just gonna let it fester?

All right. Well, I was a little rusty, okay?

That's a insult to rust, ain't it?

Well, what about you, motherfucker?

Last night, look like you were stuck in cement.

I had a hip replacement, Louis.

Well, you should've paid a hundred more dollars and got the deluxe model with some rhythm in it.

'Cause that motherfucker you got, it ain't working. Oh, that's fine, man.

But that's not what we talking about.

I'm talking about Odetta.


Louis, if I thought there was still gonna be a problem between us... You went where you shouldn't have gone, period!

Now, there's some shit that's just etched in stone.

First and foremost is thou shall not dig for diamonds in another brother's mine!

Bullshit, man. You gotta take some responsibility here.

You think she didn't know, man, about all of your smoking and drinking and drugs and other women? She knew.

She came running to me telling, "My man Louis did this. Louis did that. Hold me, Floyd. "

All right, well, getting the pussy is one thing.

You ain't had to marry her. What?

You'd have to be a zip-down fool to let her slide through your fingers, man.

All right, well, if I'm a fool, then you are, too.

You think I don't know that? She hurt my heart, too.

Good! That's a poor motherfucking comfort.

But it's comfort, nonetheless.

Every night I'm telling Whoopie Every time you're here, you're making

- Whoopie Whool Whoopie

Well, how many times did you say you was married after Odetta?



I married this girl named Estelle to get over Odetta.

Then I married Henrietta.

She wasn't no good for me.

Then I married Josephine.

She definitely wasn't no good for me because she met Carl.

All right. That's three.

Who was lucky number four?

Her name was Consuelo.

She left me and went back to Cuba.

Ha ha ha! People actually go back to Cuba?

She said she'd rather spend the rest of her life under that dictatorship than spend another night with me.

How 'bout you? How come you never got married?

I almost hooked up with this girl down in the Philippines, in Manila.

Wow. But, uh, I couldn't learn to speak Tagalog, and only English she knew was, "Me love you long time for two dollar. "

Yeah, I wasn't no good at relationships after Odetta.

You ever hear from her?

Who, Mai Mai?

No. Odetta.

Oh. No, man.

I heard from her, man.

It was sometime around Christmas.

You know, in that place she was living in Tulsa. You know?

Fuck it. Pow, pow, pow, pow, pow.

What you doing?

I saw a coyote. Whyn't you put that thing up before somebody get hurt, man?

How come you think I don't know how to handle no damn piece, man? Think?

I know.


Yeah, come fuck with me now, Louis.

Come on. You think I'm soft, huh?

Yeah. I'll bust one in your ass.

Floyd, you keep fucking around, I'm gonna stick that gun so far up your ass, you gonna taste gunpowder every time you talk.

Well, let me... Shit!

God damn it!

Louis, that was a accident. I swear.

I'm sweating. My hand's wet.

You all right?

You warm? You hot?

You dizzy? You light-headed?

Louis, I swear I would never want to hurt you, man.

I thought about killing you, but I'd never want to hurt you.

All right. In our continuing tribute to Marcus Hooks, we're reaching all the way back in this next song.

Lou. That's us, man.

- Listen. ... Martin Hooks and The Real Deal.

Number 3 in 1969... "I'm Your Puppet. "

Pull the string And I'll wink at you I'm your puppet

Mm-hmm, yeah I'll do funny things If you want me to I'm your puppet Come on, Lou.

I'll say this for him... that motherfucker could sing.

No doubt. No doubt. Come on, help me... help me out.

Second verse. Second?

"Pull my strings. " Kiss.

...your puppet What... You ready?

1, 2, 3.

Hit it.

Pull another string, and I'll kiss your lips I'm your puppet Ohh, ohh, ohh

- Tap. Yeah Snap your fingers And I'll turn You some flips I'm your puppet Man, my hip hurt like anything. Drop step.

Drop step? You know I can't do that right now.

Go, Lou.

Owww! Man.

Oh, sweet. Do it, Louie. is wiggle...

Oh! Oh! Oh!

I'm your puppet

- Oh, yes, I am One more time.

- There you go, Floyd. I'm your puppet Oh! Come on now.

- Mmm, yeah Yeah, I got it now.

- I got it. Yeah I'm your puppet So where'd you book us next?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

This is it?

Come on, children And gather around Want y'all to see We're putting down It's a thing Everybody can do So come on, children Do the boogie, too Boogie ain't nothing But gettin' down Boogie ain't nothing But gettin' down I got to boogie for you Floyd Henderson What is it?

Boogie on down Whoo-hoo!

Louis Hinds Boogie on down Listen to the band We'll make it through All we got Is the boogie, too I got to boogie for you Whoo Hey, you, what you got, baby? You got to boogie for me?

Come on, now. Oh, yeah Come on.


Come on, fiddler.

I knew you were gonna try to take over.

Look at him.

Go on, Lou.

Come on. Oww!

Boogie ain't nothing But gettin' down Boogie ain't nothing But gettin' down Boogie ain't nothing but getting down Ow!

Boogie ain't nothing But getting down Come on. I got to boogie for you I got to boogie for you I got nothing but boogie Nothing but boogie for you Ooh I got nothing but boogie Yeah Nothing but boogie for you Boogie, boogie, boogie, boogie Oh, yeah Boogie, boogie, boogie, boogie Boogie, boogie, boogie, boogie Oh, yeah I got to boogie for you Aah!

Share the love, baby.

All right, all right.

You know you pulled the Al Green up there, right?

No, I didn't, Lou. Don't start that...

We barely got offstage when you ran your ass back out there.

Look, an encore is at the audience's discretion.

You're supposed to wait till they ask for it.

You know they wanted it. I don't care what they wanted.

That shit was unprofessional.


Say, I'm starting to remember why I love the road so much.



If my instincts serve me right, you're about to find yourself another room tonight.

You know those little blue pills make you go blind, right?

Mmm, mmm.

Don't call me when you get that four-hour erection.

Hey, now, baby girl.

Yeah, yeah. Come on.

Oh. Aah!

Yeah, give it to me.

Those little pills, give me strength.

A little strength.


I'm going to fuck your brains out.

Oh! Oh, you're heavy.

Uh, what's wrong, baby?


I just, uh, you know, I...

I just never been with someone like you before.

It's true what they say. But let me tell you something.

Floyd Henderson gonna be nice and gentle.

Your first taste of dark meat gonna be smooth and sweet, trust me.

No, I didn't mean that.

It's just, uh, you know, I've never been with someone so old.


You ain't no teen queen your damn self.


Come on, come on, come on.

Come on, mama. Come here, baby.

Baby, baby. Look here.

Let's take our decades of sexual experience and combine them for one night of exploration and bliss, can we do that?

I won't disappoint you.

All right.

That's what I'm talking about.

I want to suck one of them titties.

Oh, yeah? Well, I got something to show you.

Ooh. Ooh, hoo.

I'm so hot, I'm about to fuck myself.

Bite my lip off.

Oh. Look!

Oh, shoot, I'm leaking, girl.

Tonight I ain't got no control like that no more.

Now, I hope you don't mind a little hair.

Baby, I found my sexual awakening in the '60s.

Nothing I like better than a big old fluffy...

Damn, girl.

That's a whole bunch of hair you got down there.

Yeah, I call it the natural look.

You sick?

I know it's big.

You need a pick.

You want me to shave it?

We ain't got the time or apparatus for that type of job.

Okay, disregard.


Oh! Oh!

Look who's coming to dinner.

Right on time, ain't it?

They call me Mr. Tibbs.


You know what I'm gonna do for you?

What you fixing to do?

You ever had a velveteen rub?

A velveteen rub.

Ain't... Ain't no cheese involved, is there?

Because I'm lactose intolerant.

Oh, yeah.


You're choking my chicken!



That's quite a show you got going under the big top there, Sparky.

I had to take another one of them damn pills in the middle of the night, man.

This woman insatiable, man. I'm shooting dust.

Oh, Floyd.

I'm right here, baby.

You ready for some more?

Yeah, come here.

Come here.


Think about that, boy.

There's my stallion.


I missed you. Oh, you missed me?


Mmm. You need a little air on this thing.


Oh, you bad boy.

God damn.

You like that, huh?

I'm your little kitty cat.



You little whore.

You're one to talk.

Oh, did you take out your teeth for him?

You watch how you talk to your mama.

Please, you can't talk to me like that.

You're not my daddy.

That's right, who's your daddy?

You're my daddy. Your big daddy.

Rosalee, are you in there?

Actually, that's my daddy.


What are you thinking, Mama?

You ruined everything.

I hate you. You little brat.

You're a dirty... all right, I love you.

Mmm. Call me a lot of times.

Mama, what is wrong with you?

I renounce you. You're a whore. Aah!

I'm a whore? Yeah.

You just shamed the whole family, you and the black man.


Whoo! That was fun.

So come, take me by the hand We'll leave this troubled land

- Yeah. I know we can I know we can I'll be damned, man.

Them broads stole our money, man.

Whoo, yeah, but they earned it.


Yeah, man. It's Floyd Henderson, man.

We got a situation.

What's the problem?

Well, my ex-partner, the degenerate that he is, man, got some trailer trash hos, man, rip us off.

Oh, wow, I'm sorry to hear that.

Is there anything I can do?

Yeah, there's something you can do. We need money.

If we don't get no money, we ain't gonna make it to the Apollo.

I'm not sure what the procedure for that would be.

I mean, there's just a lot of red tape here.

You know, uh...

I'm going to have to get back to you.

- You do that. Get back with me now. Mr. Henderson...

We ain't gonna get very far on ten gallons of gas, I can tell you that.

I know where we can get some money.

I know how to get some money.

Ain't no love, ain't no love Like my baby's love Ain't no lonely days Ain't no lonely Ooh, shit. What the hell is...

'Cause I ain't never, never found me a girl Oh, hell, no. You didn't.

Yes, I did.

- To love me like I do Oh, yeah Hey.

Hey, hey, you're... What is wrong with you?

Don't be grabbing on me like that now.

I will knock your ass out before I let you go ring that doorbell.

Come on, get up on me, man. Come on.

You really want this? Huh?

Huh? Come on... Oh! God damn.

Oh, man. Come on... What?

Oh! What's wrong, what?

I got a pain in my chest, man.

Come on, man. Stop fucking with me.

Look like I'm fucking with you, man?

Come on, man, do me a favor.

Get my heart medicine out of my bag.

You got some heart med... Oh! Come on, look.

Come on, man. Hurry up, man.

Hold on, man!

God damn, you got enough stuff in here to start a drug store!

What it say on the bottle?

Sucker, motherfucker.

I'm gonna get your ass for this.

I'll leave the light on for you.

What up, dawg?


We're friends of, uh, Odetta's.

Odetta? Yeah, is she in?

No, she ain't here, man.

Is she coming back?

Seriously doubt it.

Not unless we fitting to have a zombie attack or some shit.


What's up, Fu Manchu?

Cleo! Yeah?

Get your ass out here!

Two old niggers looking for your mama.

Come on in, man. You're letting the heat out.


Cold outside.

Your arthritis gonna kick up.

Who's that?

I don't know.


Uh, how you doing, ma'am?

My name is Floyd Henderson. This is my...

I know who you are.

Guess you didn't hear about the funeral.

Funeral? Odetta...

When did she pass?

Well, she got sick right after Christmas.

After that, it went pretty fast.

So why'd you come to see her?

What, she owe you money or something?

Oh, no. We just in the neighborhood.

Cleo, I can't find the bologna!

I'll be there in a minute!

Hurry up!

Well, if my mama wasn't dead, I'd tell her you stopped by.


Just hold on a second. C-L-E-O!

What the hell you want? I'm sorry...

I told you this was a bad idea to come here.

Come on, man. Don't go there.

Let's just go, okay?

How old you think she is?

27, 28?

I don't know how old she is, and I don't care. Let's go.

Chillax, let me see something.

What are you doing?

Floyd, what the hell are you looking for?

Damn it.

I'm just confirming a suspicion.

That's all I'm doing.

September 14, 1981. Bingo.

It kind of works itself out, don't it?

Put it back.


Odetta left me, man, Thanksgiving Day, man, 1980.

So? So you do the math, motherfucker.

Do the math? Nigga, please...

Oh, shit. You hear that?

Hear what?

Listen, that bass line, right there.


Son of a bitch.

Oh, my name is Lester, the Court Jester All you other rap niggas done messed up I take you to school a semester Take you to court and sequester Yeah! I'm judge and the jury Bruce Lee, Fists of Fury.

You want to whip me, the L-E-S-T-E-R Grab my girl by the waist Slap my girl in the face When my mama died, I moved inside her crib Hey, hey. Les, Les.

Hey, man, what you doing in here?

We're here trying to make some music.

That what y'all doing?

I don't see no musicians.

Listen, you know who played the base line on that stuff you got running under those so-called lyrics?

My man, right there.

Yeah, right, man.

He ain't no damn instrumentator.

Hey, yo, Big L, check it out, man. It's them, man.

They ain't bullshitting.

Let me see this here.

The Real Deal, huh?

Hey, I mean, so what if we jacked your shit, man? Huh?

Good artists borrow, great artists steal, man.

You know who said that? Pablo Picasso.

But literary scholars sometimes like to attribute it to T.S. Eliot.

Hell, no. It wasn't no damn Missy Elliot, man.

No, man, it was Bay Bay and them.

Bay Bay, yup.

That was Bay Bay, for sure, hey, Bay Bay.

Look, man.

You know what? I'm sorry.

I shouldn't have sampled your music without permission.

Why don't we all do a song together?

A song called "Fuck You and Your Bass Line. "

That's what I feel about it.

Here what I think about your damn bassline.

Henderson and Hinds!

Take that shit with you.

Gold-faced motherfucker.

I made that shit gangster, that's what I did.

Let me tell you something, man, you...

Hey! Stop it!

Stop it!

Hey! This is my house. You hear me?

I don't need this shit right now.

You gonna talk to me crazy in front of my boys?

Why you still talking? Shut the fuck up!

Pay-Pay and Zig-Zig, let's dip, man.

Bye, old niggers.

Feel free to utilize my facilities while you're here to make yourself another hit.

I know you ain't had a hit since Ike hit Tina.

Get out of here.

Get the fuck Out my grill

'Fore you get killed My name is Lester the Court Jester.

What a disrespectful son of a bitch.

Just lay off. Just lay off?

I know your mama taught you better.

Odetta would've whooped his damn ass.

The fuck you know about what my mama would've done.

Were you here when she was dying of that cancer?

I don't think so. I think Lester was. The hell you know.

You're right. I don't know nothing.

That's right, he don't know shit.

No, he don't.

Now I'm going to go change and get dinner started because you guys are staying, right?

Oh, no. We need to hit the road.

Yes, ma'am. We are staying.

Okay, then.

Hell, it's what Mama would've wanted.

Oh, yeah. That's Odetta's child, all right.

Okay, I put some sheets on the bed in the guest room for you guys.

Thank you.

That's Carla Thomas, right?

Sure is. Your mother's favorite.

So how come you guys only put out that one album?

Well, when we wasn't fighting over your mother, we had a problem in our record sales.

Yeah, as in we didn't sell any.


Well, you'd never know it wasn't a hit, as much as Mama played it.

About 100 degrees, and you got a leather jacket on.

Appreciate it, Sam.

She said, being on the road with y'all was some of the best times of her life.

Oh, good days. Good days.

I wish I could've seen that.

Say, why don't you come to Memphis with us?

Memphis? Yeah.

What? We got a gig.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Floyd, Floyd.

The girl got a life.

She ain't got time to be ripping, running up and down the road with two old niggers.

Why not?

Memphis is fun. We always have fun in Memphis.

You'll enjoy it. Trust me.

Fun? Look like I got time for fun?


Hey, Louis.

You know, Cleo was telling me that Odetta never told her nothing about her father, not even his name.

But she did say he was a musician.

You ain't said nothing stupid to the girl, have you?

Like what?

Oh, like, uh, Cleo, you know, I'm your daddy.

Well, I'm still feeling out the situation.

What the fuck was that that "You ought to come to Memphis with us" shit?

Now that, right there, that's a recipe for disaster.

Louis, Louis, I know this ain't easy for you.

But I never thought I'd have a child.

Now I'm part of this big old circle called life.

A piece of Floyd Henderson, man, might be here to live on, and maybe forever.

If you don't shut up and go to sleep, a big piece of Floyd Henderson ass might not wake up in the morning.

Oh, Louis, Louis.

I respect the fact that you want to cloak your pain with your anger.

Good night.

Oh, hey! What the fuck is that?

What's wrong?

You been taking them dick pills again?

I though it was my cholesterol meds, I swear I did.

You can't be spooning with a motherfucker with that!

What's wrong with you?

Uh, I... Nasty son of a bitch!

Give me some covers. I'm gonna sleep on the floor.


Go on, then. Sleep on the floor.

Nobody wants you, Louis.

I don't like boy pussy no way.

I hope your back hurt like a motherfucker.

Better my back than my asshole.

Nasty... I'll beat your motherfucking...

All them years I spent in prison, ain't nobody roll up on me like that.

I was going to ask you about that.

You ought to be ashamed of your goddamn self, nasty son of a bitch.

Like I never had

When I'm feeling bad Come on and comfort me Oh, baby, you know the way I showed you how to love me right So comfort me tonight Come on and comfort me, honey You know the way, baby

'Cause I showed you right

I want it, I want it Why don't you

Comfort me?



Mr. Henderson. Mr. Henderson?

No, this is Louis.

Mr. Hinds.

It's Phillip Newman of FC Management.

How are you, man? I'm a huge fan.



I think I've solved your cash flow problems, my man.

I've withdrawn $10,000 from my old parents' savings account to tide you over until things get sorted out.

Who'd you say you was again?


I wrote you letters when the man had you locked down in the pen, you know?

I know you're innocent. Shit ain't right.

Okay, Phillip, um, look here.

We're on our way to Memphis.

Um, why don't you meet us at, um, the fountain at Peabody Hotel, 5:00?

Memphis. All right!

I'm hungrier than a mo...

There you are, girl. You make up your mind?

You want to go to Memphis with us, or not?

What you gonna do?

What happened?

Nothing. Nothing happened.

Nothing happened.

No. Uh-uh, uh-uh.

Let him get his whupping.

Why you hit her?

The hell you gonna do about it, man?

I'm the nigger with the gun, man.

Oh, shit.

Damn! Ugh!

Aah! Come on.

Get your albino Ike Turner ass up, uh-huh.

Come on.

Aah! Okay! Oh, shit! Aah!

My follicles, man!

Look her in the eye and say "I'm sorry I hit you, and I'm never gonna put my hands on you again. "

My bad, baby. I ain't... Say what I told you to say!

I'm sorry I hit you. I ain't never gonna do it again.

Now, say you're sorry for sampling my bass line and for stomping on my partner's record.

I'm sorry for sampling your bass line and stomping on your Real Deal record. Okay.

Now, we taking a road trip, and we need some gas money.

I ain't got no money, man!

Can you help us? I saw you out there selling that shit.

It's weed, it ain't crack man! I ain't got...

Give me the money! Okay, okay.

There's money in my shorts...

Ain't nobody reaching in your drawers, get it out!

Okay, okay.

I got to reach around my meat, man.

Here. Take it.

Take it.

Oh, damn. My hair hurts.

Take it, man! Aah!

Ow! You're breaking my arm!

Oh, hush.

That's just a little Chinese submission hold.

This is what it feels like when I break your arm.

Shit! Break his arm.

Oh, bastard!

I know motherfuckers like you, Lester.

Used to see them in the yard every day.

You'd better hope you don't never go inside because you, you straight up bitch material.

What about my car, man?

What about your car?

Oh, shit.

I ain't got no clothes on.

This is bullshit.

So what? You run around with your drawers hanging off your ass anyway.

I wasn't really gonna shoot you!

Get the fuck out of here.

See, I'm the nigger with the gun now.

You better hope my arm don't get better.

I'm gonna learn karate and kick your ass!

Fuck you!

It was a good thing you stepped in when you did what you did, partner, because if I'd have got a piece of him, I'd have fucked his shit up entirely, and you know that.

Come on.

I'm too old to be tussling with the motherf...

I'd have shot him. I'd have popped...

I'm six, seven years older. I'd have, like, tussled...

Whoo Welcome back to the Soul Patrol.

I'm Isaac Hayes.

I want to give a shout-out to Floyd Henderson and Louis Hinds, The Real Deal.

They're back in Memphis tonight performing at the House of Soul.

Train number 1 is gone Welcome back home, fellas.

Train number 2 is gone Train number 3 is been gone How long must I wait for you Look out with it.

Whoo, hey, yeah It's the Memphis train The Orpheum Theatre!

Our show's up in there.

How long must I wait for you?

Yeah, yeah Ooh, wee The Memphis train Let me try it one more time Say, ooh, ooh, ooh, wee Oh, my God.

Mr. Henderson, Mr. Hinds, let me just start off by saying...

Thank you.

What's up?

Phillip, tonight we're playing at the House of Soul.

Make sure you be there, baby.

Right on.

Hello. Welcome to the Peabody. How can I help you?

You can help me by giving me three of your best doggone suites, baby.

Well, it'll be my pleasure to assist you today.

May I see some identification, please?


Right there.

Go to hell, Louis.

Mr. Henderson?

It is I.

Will you excuse me for just a minute, please?



Ahh, I-I'm sorry, Mr. Henderson, Henderson.

We're unable to accommodate you.

Perhaps we could recommend another hotel.

For what, man? I'm in Memphis.

I want to stay at the Peabody.

Yes, sir, I understand you've stayed with us before, and apparently, that's the problem.

It seems that the last time you stayed here...

March 12, 1978, to be exact... you hosted a party, during which the room and several other areas of the hotel sustained extensive damage. Uh-oh.

I don't recollect nothing like that.

I think that's the night Sly and Bootsy came by with the fire-eater.

Is that the one with the snake?

That's the one. Hmm.

Perhaps you could put those rooms in the name of Louis Hinds.

Yeah, perhaps.

Louis Hinds, we'll try that.

I'm sorry you had to see that, Linda.

What's on there? Let me see that shit.

I want to see what's on there.

I need four rooms, Don.

Your best available.

Oh, hey, guys.

Your tailor gave me several choices for tonight.

He said he's going to stop by around 7:30.

What the fuck?

Did you catch the sale over at the Build-A-Pimp?

You like that? It's fly, huh?

It's a get-down, get-down. It's live. It's funky.

And I think I'm going to get some poonanny.

To be honest with you, I haven't been laid since Friends was on television.

So this is my night.

You sure that ain't one of your children?

You gonna sing real nice tonight.

Who's the girl singer?

Oh, my goodness! Look at here! Oh, man.

Hello, Louis. Good to see you.

You good, man?

Hey, good-looking.

Claudette. How you doing, girl?

I know you still ain't upset about what happened in Baltimore that...

Oh! What's wrong with you, woman?

You going straight to hell, Floyd Henderson.

What you laughing at?

You want some, too? No.

Fuck you.


Fuck you, fuck you Now we have no girl singer.

We just got to find a replacement, that's all.

It's too late.


You know all our songs, right?

Ho ho ho. No offense, man, but I'm not playing with no rank amateur.

Come on, Wolfman, this ain't no rank amateur, man.

This Odetta Whitfield's daughter, man.

Ain't got to recognize.

Shit. Let's roll, then, baby.


She can sing, can't she?



Oh, oh!

Here we go.

Oh, yeah.

If music makes you move You can really groove Groove on If you feel like you want to make love Under the stars above Love on Love on If there's something that you wanna say And talking is the hard way Rap on

'Cause whatever You want to do Ow You got to do your thing

If you feel like you want to scream If that's your way you let off steam Scream on Scream on If you feel like you want to sing

'Cause singing is your thing Sing on Sing on If you want to make love all night

'Cause you feel it's right Right on Oh, yeah, girl.

Right on

'Cause whatever You want to do You got to do your thing

I'm with the band. Yeah, it's a dream.

Yeah, it's a... it's a total dream.


I play the harmuffica.

Wa, wa I'll save you a seat.

'Cause whatever You want to do Yeah, baby, oh

You got to do your thing Yeah


This is the most insane night of my life.

You know Isaac wants to put me in his studio?

He says he's got a song that'd be perfect for me.

Oh, he does, does he?

Uh... Come on, now. It ain't like that.

Oh, it's always like that, like movies.

Well, I'll be careful.

Just trying to look out for you, that's all.

Thanks, guys, for everything.

You got to do your thing, hey See you later.

If you feel like making love

'Cause that's your thing Right on Man, ain't that the Real Deal car?

Sure is, homie. You a fan?

Hell, yeah. I'm a big fan.

You know where they at?

'Cause I need to holler at 'em.

Actually, I'm their manager.

Really? Their manager?

Hold on a minute.

Oh, hi, Floyd. Hey.

Come on in. Check this place out.

I could get used to this.

I'll bet you could.

Let me get you a drink.

Yeah, I'll take one.

But hold on, before you do that, there's something I want to say to you.

It's been a blast connecting with you.

I want you to know that.

That's sweet of you.

And if you need anything, like money or something like that, don't you hesitate to call me now.

Not that money gonna make up for the lost time between us or nothing like that.

Lost time?

You have to understand, Odetta never told me nothing about you.

Had I known about you from the beginning, I'd have been here from the start. Whoa, whoa.

Floyd... She never said nothing to me about you.

You're not my father, Floyd.

You're not listening.

See, the thing you... what's that? Say what?

You're not my father.

I- I'm not?


How do you know?

Because he knows who I am Or he did.

I mean, for all I know, he could be dead.

I get a little money from him every once in a while.

It's a blind trust he set up years ago.

Something to do with his music royalties.

Music royalties?


You knocked up my wife, motherfucker.

Ooh. You stole her from me first.

What is wrong with you?


You lost your...

You didn't tell Cleo, did you?

No, I didn't tell her.

I should've told her, though.

I'll bet you laughing your ass off, wasn't you?

Going around, talking about I'm the girl's daddy and big round circle of life, all that bullshit.

Giggle, giggle, motherfucker.

Well, just a little bit.


Look, Floyd...

Floyd, put it down. Put it down!

Dawg, come on!

You need to quit before you get hurt.

Oh! Oh! Whoa! Oh!


Look, Floyd, I didn't mean for it to happen, all right?

You know how she was.

Come here.

Come on, man. Stop acting a fool.

You all right?

Aw, shit. Quit acting a fool!

Fucking dad!

What the fuck is wrong with you?

Time out.


Still got a little pop in your punch there, partner.

Pop this, motherfucker!



Shit. Ugh.

You dirty motherfucker, hitting me in the nuts.

Ooh! Shit.

Louis, you just can't keep whooping on my ass.

I'm a motherfucking man, baby.

I'm a motherfucking man.

Louis, how come you won't see your own daughter?

Oh, motherfucker, I wanted to see her, but, you know...

It's time... After a while, you know, it's just... it's just too much.

Why didn't O tell her?

Why didn't Odetta tell her, man?

What was she going to tell her, huh?

That her daddy was a alcoholic dopehead convict that fucked up everything he touched, hmm?

No, no.

She was better off without me.

Oh, shit.

Anyhow, it's too late now.


It was a mistake getting to know her.

Lou... What?

What is wrong with you? You having a seizure?

What? What?


Oh. Cleo.

Cleo, wait. Ow! Excuse me.

God damn it. Wait!

Let me talk to... ow!

Move, God damn it!

Come here, Cleo!

Call the police.

Hey, yo, white boy.

You really in the music business?

Why, do you have a mix tape?

Shut the fuck up, white boy!

And stop sweating so goddamn much.

You smell like bacon.

And I'm a Muslim on Saturdays.

Fucking wrong with you, huh?

How you white and got a afro?

That ain't cool.

Damn, my head hurt!

Hey, there go Cleo. There go Cleo.


There go my baby, right there.

Where she going?

Where to, honey?


Oh, hell, yeah.

There go that old Snoop Dogg-looking motherfucker.

Real Deal, they fitting to be real dead!

I'm coming for you, old man!

Hey, yo, Les, let them old motherfuckers have it, man.

I'm going for it. Go for it, nigger.

Get them motherfuckers.

Hey, hey, hey.

Come on, now. You know I'm the only who drive the Mothership, man.

Watch this shit with Lester about to kill on these motherfuckers.

That's how we live, we do it like that.


I'm back!



Oh, shit! Motherfucking Lester got fucked up!

God damn!

I'm out of this motherfucker...

What about Lester, man? Fuck Lester.

Yeah, fuck Lester!

You don't even know Lester, man.

Why you run over me, man!

You old dirty bastard!

Old Jim Brown, Fred Williamson, two-the-hard-way motherfuckers!

I'll kill you, I swear...

Aah! Shit!

Let me kill you one time at least, man!

You done fucked up the Mothership.

I ought to stab you in your throat.

Fuck you! Aah!

You hear that?

Shoot that motherfucker, Louis.

Get your hands up!

I can't, nigger. My arm's in a brace.

Drop the weapon now! Come on!

This is my first time ever being in here.

Quiet, please.

This filthy-ass motherfucking place, man, got me itching.

Yo, turnkey!

Come on and let me out of this motherfucker!

You might want to wrap your mind around the fact that we're gonna miss that show.

Fuck you talking about, man?

We gotta be in New York tomorrow night.

Uh-uh. Not me.

I've had enough. I'm done.

What, you're walking out on me, Louis?

Look, Floyd, I was doing just fine before you showed up at my door.

That's the thanks I get for pulling you out of that fucking rat hole.

You was just sitting up in there, just sitting there waiting to die.

Negro, please.

You ain't no different from me, Especially since your nephew put your senile ass out to pasture and stole your business.

Fuck you, Louis.

Crawl back under that damn rock you've been living.

I don't need you.

I'll do this shit by my damn self.

Yo! Turnkey!

Come on and let me out of this motherfucker.

I've had enough, man. I want my lawyer.

Relax, relax.

You ain't gonna need no lawyer.

Witnesses say your story checks out, so you, sir, are good to go.


Whoa. Hold on there, Chuck Berry.

You're gonna need a lawyer.

Seems crossing state lines is in violation of his parole, Not to mention possession of firearms and driving without a license.

No license?

Step back for a minute.

I hope your ass rot up in here, you criminal-bound motherfucker, you.

As Lao-Tzu says, "Let things flow forward as they may. "

And I'm gonna let it flow, too, baby.

And I got some Blackanese philosophical shit for your ass, pal.

You get by, Lou, but you don't get away.

You sit in shit, you start to smell like it, so check the crack of your ass.

Here's something else for you.

Here go her number.

Call her... Daddy.

Fuck him, man!

Let's get on out of this motherfucker.

He ain't worth two damn flies smashed.



Hey. Yo!

Can I make a phone call?

You walking out on me, Louis?

I've had enough. I'm done.

You all right, man?

Um, yeah, yeah. I'm all right.

You're not all right. You can't hardly breathe.

You need a chest X-ray.

I ain't trying to make no comeback.

I'm gone, and I want to stay gone.

That's the thanks I get for pulling you out of that rat hole, just sitting there waiting to die... sitting there waiting to die...

- die, die... It's too late.

Is there a doctor in the house?

Keep it short.

- Hey... Hello.

It's Cleo. Please leave a message.

Cleo... um, this is, uh, Louis.

Louis Hinds.

Your father.

Wow, um, feels funny saying that.

I've, um, I've never said it before.



I didn't mean what I said.

I was...

Odetta was the love of my life.

The worst thing that ever happened to me was losing her and you.

But you turned out great.

She did a wonderful job with you.

You know your mother was an amazing woman.

And I just want you to know I'm really, really glad I met you.

And I wish I...


All right.

What the fuck do you think you're doing?


Busting your ass out of jail.

What the fuck does it look like I'm doing?

Back up, Red. Get your keys out.

Open that cell, okay?

Deputy, don't listen to him.

He will not shoot you. Not on purpose anyway.

Don't let him get you fucked up, Red.

I'll kill you disco-dead.

Now open that doggone cell, man.

Stop shaking. If you shake, I'm gonna start shaking.

Next thing you know, kapow!

Go on in.

Now hand him the keys.

Hand them to him.

Okay? Floyd.

You sure you want to do this?

Does everything gotta be a fucking argument with you?

God damn! Come on out of there!

Close the door, Lou. Lock it up.

I'm a hostage.

You're gonna be a dead hostage if you don't shut the fuck up.

Now look here, Red.

I like you, almost.

You call anybody outside your mama, kapow.


Let's get out of here.

Anybody following us, man?

Not yet.

But you can bet your ass they will be.

Lou, we gotta dump the Mothership, man.

We gotta dump it.

You'd abandon the Mothership?

We're fugitives from the law.

We gotta start thinking like it.

We're not fugitives, O.J.

You're a fugitive. I'm a hostage.

That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

Wait, wait, wait.

Hold, hold, hold, hold, hold, hold.

Look at that right there, man.

Ain't that Lester's car?


We're hungry, man. Come up with some baked chicken or something.

They're at it again.

Oh, shit! Lester's car!

You hear that? What?


Oh, my God! Oh, God, no! Oh, God...

Mr. Hinds. Mr. Henderson.

It's so good to see you.

Oh, my God.

Oh, it was so hot in there. You have no idea.

If there's anything I can get you, like a latte, I'm here for you guys.

But first I really have to pee, so I'm just gonna hop on out.

If you could give me a hand out of here.

I've been locked in there, and they've had the woofers going all day.

Oh, my God.

I just have to pee real bad, so if you don't mind.

It's so good to see you.

Oh, Mr. Hinds...


The body of Marcus Hooks arrived at Kennedy Airport earlier this morning, and in a processional befitting a king, will make its way to the Apollo Theatre, where it will lie in state...

I'm watching it right now.

...appropriately enough, in a piano-shaped coffin for the thousands of mourners gathered to pay tribute to the beloved soul pioneer.

Meanwhile, in related news, authorities continue the search for Floyd Henderson and Louis Hinds, following a daring jailbreak early this morning.

The two backup singers were on their way to New York City to perform at tonight's tribute honoring their one-time partner.

Fucking A!

Local economy is getting a big boost from...

Yeah. No, no. L... I understand.

Uh, that's my other line.

I'll call you back. This is Danny.

Hello, Mr. Epstein.

Phillip Newman. I broke your stapler last week.

- Are you kidding me? Hello?

Where the hell are you?

Listen, I called because I just wanted to let you know that everything's cool, and we're still on target.


You're with Henderson and Hinds?

Yes, sir.

They say "motherfucker" a lot, but they're really good guys.

All right, well, good.

You can give them this message.

The network just called, and they're off the show.

But they can't do that!

Oh, really? It's VH1.

Have you seen Flava of Love?

They can pretty much do whatever they want.

And another thing, you're fired.

Motherfucker! What the fuck?

What'd he say?

Uh, he said I'm fired, and... and, uh, and you're off the show.

Are... Are you serious, man?

I'm so sorry.

Nnn! Nnn! Nnn!

You know, uh, according to the map, that road leads to the turnpike.

I think we've still got time to make it.

Make what, Louis?

You heard what the motherfucker said!

It's over!

Fuck that.

This shit ain't over till we say it's over, all right?

Things have changed, and I have achieved a state of mental clarity.

Ain't that a bitch?

You hear what this motherfucker said?

Ever since I knocked on your door, man, you've been beating my balls at every fucking turn.

Now all of a sudden, you've got a state of clarity.

Where was your clarity in L.A., Lou?

You can't just dial that shit up like you calling for a pizza, motherfucker.

You got to go inside, do the work.

Consequently, I have a confession.

Floyd, you were right about me.

I have given up on a lot of things in my life.

But I ain't giving up on this. All right?

Come on, man, we've been through enough shit the last few days.

We can do this.

And I dare anybody to try to stop us.

Let's go, motherfucker.


Get your ass in the backseat.

Ain't no stoppin' us now We're on the move

There's been so many things that's held us down But now it looks Like things are finally coming around Don't you let nothing, nothing Stand in your way I want y'all to listen, listen To every word I say, every word I say Ain't no stopping us now No, no, no We're on the move The movin' groovin'

Ain't no stopping us now Full sound and switch on all the floor monitors, all right?

Look at that. That's nice and subtle.

I'm on it, then. Sound check.

Okay. Thanks.

Mr. Epstein. Yeah?

Hey, thank God you're here.

Oh, God, this isn't happening.

What are you doing here? I thought I fired you.

I just wanted to tell you I'm not alone.

You guys are insane!

Good to see you, too, Little Ep.

Yeah, this is never going to happen.

You'll be arrested the moment the cops spot you.

We don't care anything about that.

We just want to do our song.

Oh, one other thing. You got a few minutes?

Yeah, I got all the time in the world.

I'm just producing a television show with dozens of huge musical acts that goes live in 171/2 minutes, but you know, let's grab some coffee and have a little chit-chat.

Wow. How long's he got?

We don't know.

All right.

I'll see what I can do. Okay?

Thank you.

Ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen, please take your seats.

The ceremony will begin shortly.

I'll get it.


The Black Moses.

How's it going, man?

Hey, what's happening?

What's up, baby?

Hey, fellas.

Hey, what's happening?

The man. My man.

Okay, all right.

Heard you were here. Just wanted to wish you luck.

Oh, by the way, brought somebody by to see you.

Oh, is that right?


Okay, everybody, let's move on out of here.

Come on.

All right, you heard what Mr. Henderson said.

After you, young man.


I'm sorry I ran out the way I did.

I'm the one who ran out.

There's no need for you to apologize.

Can I help you with your tie?

Yeah, sure.

You know what you're doing?

Yeah, I know what I'm doing.

Here you go.

Mm! Ohh!

You all right?

Yeah. Just some water, please.


All cameras are on point.

We just added two mics.

Mr. Epstein! You better come quick.

Come on, I'm serious. Come on! It's important!

All right. Take care of those.

15 minutes, Danny.

He just collapsed.

I think he's in a lot of pain.

Open your hand. Open your hand.

Right there, right there.

Okay, okay.

Be strong, brother. Hang on in there.

It ain't time for you to check out now.

Check out? What?

Come on, man. Everybody knows, man.

My aunt was taking the same doggone pills, man.

Took her about a week before she wasted away to nothing, just kicking and screaming.

I don't know what killed her ass, but if she was taking those, she had a bladder infection.

Say what?

Look, Doctor Dumbshit, I got a kidney stone.

Hurts like a motherfucker when I pee, but it ain't gonna kill me.

So you're not dying?

From the first slap and cry, we all start to die.

But I ain't on no accelerated program, hell, no.

Ain't that about a bitch?

All that damn hard work, busting your ass out of jail, and you ain't even dying.

I was kinda looking forward to seeing you go.

Excuse me, Danny. They're on in two.

All right. Where we at, guys?

Okay, I'm good.

The Apollo, the mecca.

This brings back memories, man.

How many times you think we've performed here?

Ooh, uh... ooh, five-oh.

50, really?

Five-oh. Oh!

Come on. Move, move.

That's them! Hold it! Hold it!

All units report, all units report.

Suspects have been spotted.

All units, apprehend them quietly and by the book.

Hey, Lou, do you think they're gone, man?

I don't have X-ray vision, motherfucker!

How would I know?

Lower your voice, Lou. Doggone it, man.

It's so dark in here you can't see shit.

Hold up.

Let me see if I can reach my lighter.

Don't light no lighter up in here, man.

We'll blow up like a barbecue.

Hold on one minute.


Marcus motherfucking Hooks.

Long way from Linwood Street, huh, motherfucker?

Fuck Linwood Street and him.

He used both of us, and you know it.

Come on, man. He just thought he'd be a bigger star going solo.

He was right.

No he wasn't.

He didn't want to split the money three ways.

Just look at him, sitting there with that old shit-eating grin on his face.

You think you're all that, motherfucker, don't you?

I have to admit, every time I think about you, I could just choke the shit out of you!

Stop it, stop it!

Floyd, he ain't thinking shit. He's dead.

Say, ain't that my watch?

See? You thought I stole that mother...

I told you this motherfucker was a klepto!

Shit, look at that.

That's nice.

Probably stole that, too.

Motherfucker always had good taste, though.

I'm gonna keep this.

Hey, Louis.

You think if, you know... if he wouldn't have, you know, died, you think we would have got back together?

Oh, hell, no.

But you know what?

We are together, and I've been thinking about our little arrangement.

I'm gonna go ahead and break you off 50/50, all right?

Wow, Lou, that's... that's real black of you, man.

Because there ain't no money.

Say what?

Well, you said it yourself.

It's a funeral.

Nobody pays you to sing, man.

You lied about the money?

Yeah. You motherfucker.

Hey, you can't say it wasn't worth it.

Well, I could say it.

But I'd be lying.

I love you, Lou.

My nigger.

But this motherfucker, you know, I can't help it.

Every time, I could just kill this motherfucker!

That's why he left, because you was always picking on him.

Stop fucking with him.

He fucked with my happiness.

Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Isaac Hayes.

Where the fuck are they, Danny?

My good friends, please join me in saying farewell to brother Marcus Hooks.

It's Louis and Floyd!

It's the Real Deal!


Marcus Hooks and the Real Deal, back together again.

Give them a hand.

Reunited, y'all.

They got their shit together.

Yes! Let's go!

Stand by. Move in on my command.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Come on, Officer detective person.

Please, just, you know, come on.

Let them sing one song. One little song.

It's not gonna hurt anybody.

The Real Deal!

All right. One song.

But it better be good.

One song. The good one.

How's that hip?

Locked and loaded, baby.

Let's do this.


Let's take a walk in the park.

1, 2, 3, 4!

Oh, yeah When the river gets to rollin'

And then you add a bowlful of soul in And then I tried to let it all go then Oh, yeah Oh, it's easy to me You see, the way I ride the rhythm You see, the truth is all I can give 'em And the lyrics can come from livin'

Oh, yeah, oh, it's easy to me Oh, yeah Music comes out of my heart Something like a walking the park It's just a walk in the park Oh, yeah And no one else in here, I heard it I don't know what I've done to deserve it You don't question it while you serve it Oh, yeah Oh, it was given to me I got something you inherit I don't know that you was born to share it And if you shoot, be sure you wear it Oh, yeah Oh, it comes naturally to me Uh-huh-uh Music comes out of my heart Yeah Something like a walk in the park It's just a walk in the park Oh, yeah Oh, yeah!

Y'all having a good time out here tonight?

This is what I'm talking about!

You know about that walk in the park, man?

Sure I know about that walk in the park.

You do? I'll tell you what.

Show them. Got to get down.

Ladies and gentlemen, let's give a big Apollo welcome to the stage for the first time, my daughter, Miss Cleo Whitfield!

To make something out of nothin'

That's what we all got in common So just hold on tight, I'm comin'

Oh, yeah, yeah Said to me I'll give you something you can believe in And then enjoy yourself this evenin'

And don't you dare think about leavin'

Oh, yeah Sing along with me Music comes out of my heart Something like a walk in the park It's just a walk in the park Oh, yeah, oh, yeah Oh, yeah Music comes out of my heart Something like a walk in the park It's just a walk in the park Oh, yeah Music comes out of my heart One song.

Something like a walk in the park A walk in the park It's just a walk in the park A walk in the park Oh, yeah Music comes out of my heart I'm their manager!

Something like a walk in the park Walk in the park It's just a walk in the park Just like a walk in the park

Oh, yeah


Yeah, ooh, yeah

Doo-doo-doo doo-doo-doo Haah You're gonna sing real nice tonight.

All right, y'all.

Got that funky time I can feel it Any time the camera or the mic comes on, I don't cheat myself.

That was rule number 1 I was taught as a kid.

And I definitely can't cheat the audience.

So I give 150%% % every single time that I do anything.

Even the way I live my life.

I just cherish each doggone moment.

A black preacher's something else, ain't it?

You can't pay your rent after you come from church.

And if you ask the preacher for the $5.00, he'll be like, "Fuck you in the name of Jesus. "

My comedy is not fictitious.

My comedy has to come from my heart.

Charlie Chan was a hell of a man. All right, let's rehearse.

He went through China with his shit in his hand.

Had five women against the wall.

I betcha five dollars that he fucked them all.

He fucked them hard.

He fucked them long.

He fucked them till his shit got sore.

He went to the doctor, and the doctor said, "Sorry, Charlie, your dick is dead. "

He said, "Doctor, Doctor, that can't be true. "

"Yes, sir, Charlie, your balls are too!"

I've been performing all my life.

So being in front of an audience has never been a problem for me.

It's time to go?

Well, go on, then.

You want to leave a lasting impression on your audience.

You know, and that's something I was taught, too, when I first started.

Always make them remember you, or remember something about you and the film.

I'm going back to my $600-a-night hotel room, have me a nice-ass, uh, piece of pussy and shit.


Cut it.

Okay, just breathe. Breathe.

I'm not even in yet.

I got to boogie for you I got nothin' but boogie Nothin' but boogie for you I got nothin' but boogie Nothin' but boogie for you Boogie, boogie

I want to say thanks to you all because you all made me... yeah.

I wouldn't have no TV show or movies.

You all was coming to see me, and you all made me...

Chattanooga, Louisiana, Mississippi.

So thank you.

I think if I had a few free passes like a lot of people, I don't think I would be as successful as I have.

My task here on Earth is I have to work harder than the average bear.

It look easy, don't it?

But it's not.

Thank you, sweetheart. Thank you.

I never can say goodbye No, no, no, I I never can say goodbye No, no, no, Even though the pain and heartaches Seem to follow me wherever I go Though I try and try to hide my feelings They always seem to show Then you try to say you're leaving me And I always have to say no Tell me why Is it so I never can say goodbye No, no, no, no I never can say goodbye I keep thinkin' that our problems Soon are gonna all work out But there's that same unhappy feeling That makes that anguish twist that doubt It's that same old dizzy hangup Can't live with you or without Tell me why Is it so I don't wanna let you go I never can say goodbye I, I'll never Say goodbye I won't say goodbye I won't try I won't let you go Won't say goodbye I can't say goodbye No I won't Oh, yeah I won't say goodbye I won't try Can't say goodbye Won't say goodbye I can't say goodbye No I want you all the time