Tango & Cash (1989) Script

Okay, let's do it.

10-4, 20 William 12.

You are eastbound, pursuing tanker truck.

Backup is available.

Air Unit 3 is in the area.

I can handIe this myseIf.

This is Air Unit 3. Forget it, Tango.

We'll take over. Drop back.

Drop dead. I've been on this case for 3 months.

We're out of ourjurisdiction. Sheriff and CHP are on the way.

Do whatever you're going to do.

Good luck.



He's crazy!


GIad you couId drop in.

Like jeweIry?

Fuck you!

I prefer bIondes.

Do the honors.

-Captain. -What's going on?

Letting the IocaIs do their thing.

You bIew out the truck window.

-Two guys are in the road. -I noticed.

-We're out of our jurisdiction here. -True.

-What's going on? -I heard a rumor about this truck.

-What about it? -It's not a truck.

It's a gas truck.

It's a major moving vioIation.

Check the first paneI?

FuII of gas.

We checked the whoIe truck! There's nothing in it!

You're out of your neighborhood, city boy!

I want your badge and weapon! I want your ass!

Who do you think you are?!

He thinks he's Rambo.

Rambo. . .

. . .is a pussy.

What do you know, it's snowing!

Anybody want to get high?

I'II be damned!

Not bad for a city guy.

Ray Tango.

He's done it to us again.

If it isn't Tango, it's Cash.

Tango and Cash! Cash and Tango!

These two cops are driving me crazy.

We must do something about this.

I agree. I wouId Iike to handIe this myseIf, Mr. Perret.

No, we wiII handIe it.


Not that way.

I have something eIse in mind.

Hey, Cash!

Armani with a badge!

Look out!

PoIice business!

This is my car!


What are you doing to my car?!

Son of a bitch!

What's wrong? Got a headache?

You crazy!

What did you do with my car?!

I beIieve in perestroika !

WeIcome to America!

Tango, I saw your picture in the paper.

Ray, Iook at this.

BIind Iuck!

-Catherine's in your office. -That's great!

You just don't take off. . .

. . .on the spur of the moment. It's--



-Very! -It's not that big a deaI.

I'II be gone a month or two.

It takes that Iong to buiId a house, not take a vacation.

A dance tour is not a vacation! I just want to get away.

You have aII you need in this town.

Grime, crime and sIime.

No, thanks. I 'd rather go.

Okay, but give me the phone numbers so I can reach you.

Why don't I caII you?

Why don't you caII me?

Catherine, if you feeI stressed, don't run away.

Stay and we'II deaI with this together.

Don't make me feeI guiIty.

I just need some time aIone, okay?

I promise, Lieutenant, to be a good girI.

There it is!

The key word.

"Good. "

You're teIIing me you'II be good because you know. . .

. . .automaticaIIy, I think you'II be bad.

What's a margin caII?


Your stockbroker's on Iine 3.

Don't Ieave.

HoId on.

I have a pIane to catch.

Catherine, don't go.

Think positive.


Harvey, it's me.

-It's good you wore a vest. -HardIy needed it with these.

HaIf-Ioad soft Iead sIugs.

This guy was reaIIy sIoppy.

Look at this.

This shirt cost $9. Get me a new vest, okay?

Whoa, pizza!

Who was fucking with my gun?

The sight's shifted.

-Maybe you dropped it. -I didn't drop it.


Get anything out of him?

No, he doesn't speak EngIish. Our interpreter says he wants a Iawyer.

Let me question him.

The guy who just tried to bIow you away? Forget it!

Stay away from him, Gabe.

So, you don't know any EngIish?

I don't know Chinese, so we'II have to give you a crash course.

But I got a feeIing you'II be a quick Iearner.

Come here. Sit down.

This is Iesson number one.

The next Iessons get harder.

Who hired you?

I don't know I don't know!

No! Wrong answer. try again

I think he's one of Quan's men.

I don't know his name. I swear!

Look at that, FIattop.

You're speaking Iike a native aIready.

-What is this? -EngIish 1 01 .

Your scumbag Iawyer won't be here for a whiIe.

Is there anything you want to share?

Think hard A deaI. Tonight.

4942. . .

. . .Front Street. 9:00.

Very good.

My compIiments.

Pretty good for your first Iesson. Don't forget to wash your hands.

There's a big bust going down, 4942 Front Street.

-Is that reIiabIe? -Yes. A phone tap.

-Fantastic. -What is this?

Downtown cIown versus BeverIy HiIIs wop.

-AII the news that's fit to print. -I don't get you.

You make a shitIoad of money. Why do you do this?


Good oId American action.

If you want to stare death in the eye, get married.

Is that a proposaI?

GabrieI Cash.

How many miIIions? How many?

How many this time?

Oh, God!

Ray Tango!

He Ioves to dance.

He waItzes in and takes aII my drugs. . .

. . .and then Tangos out again.

I've had enough.

Too much teIevision. . .

. . .can hurt your eyes.

Now do you see why we can't kiII them?


I do not see.

It wouId be much quicker.

And easier.

Quicker. . .

. . .and easier.

That's how you make a cake.

Or cIean a toiIet bowI, or shop. . .

. . .by maiI.

But it's not how to run a muIti-miIIion-doIIar business Iike ours.

Mr. Quan.

On the east side. . .

. . .your part of the city. . .

. . .GabrieI Cash. . .

. . .has cost me $60 miIIion. . .

. . .incIuding guns, drugs and other enterprises. On the west side. . .

. . .Mr. Lopez. . .

. . .Ray Tango. . .

. . .has cost me even more.

Two IittIe mice. . .

. . .and so much damage.

But if we kiII them, we risk aII-out war with the poIice.

They're heroes aIready.

Why make martyrs of them?

Instead of death. . .

. . .we have a game.

A game that onIy we can win.

Within two weeks. . .

. . .I wiII take deIivery of the Iargest shipment of weapons that. . .

. . .we have ever handIed.

Within that time. . .

. . .Tango. . .

. . .and Cash. . .

. . .wiII be safeIy tucked away. . .

. . .behind bars.

Aren't they beautifuI?

You aImost got yourseIf kiIIed, paI.

It's the other way around.

I puII this trigger, your throat's hanging off that waII.

PuII that trigger, I'II bIow you in haIf.

You never had a chance to hit me with that gun.

Not this one.

You know me?

You're L.A.'s second-best cop.

I heard the same about you.

-Stay off my case. -Your case?

I've been on it 3 months.

Then you're stupid. I've been on it 30 minutes and I caught up with you.

-Stay off my case. -Nice tie!

How do you want to do this?

I'II go first. Cover me on three.


-Two. -Three.


What's the score?

My turn.

Don't move!

Don't move your hands.

His hands aren't going anywhere.

Do the honors.

He's wired.

This is aII wrong!

-You ought to be a cop. -Did you expect this?

No, I didn't, and I didn't expect you, either.

Why is he wired?

Got me. Good luck getting anything out of him. But this is your show...

. . .so I'm gone. Ciao, babe.

Drop your weapons!

-Freeze! -We're cops!

Wait! We're on the same team! Just read this, damn it!

I'm going to bIow both your fucking brains out!

-No probIem. -I'm convinced.

He's hystericaI.

-I'd Iike a receipt for that. -Me, too.

We can taIk about this.

That's my gun.

What's it doing here?

That gun was in my Iocker.

It's not your gun now!

It's evidence.

-Why's your gun here? -They stoIe it.

TeII me what you did.

I don't know this man. I didn't come with him.

So with your permission, I'II be Ieaving. Ciao.

You didn't come with him, but you're Ieaving with him.

You're making a mistake.

You're going down for this.

Get these bastards out of here!


-You're bad karma. -I hope you got a good Iawyer.

Perret says use this tape.

-Did Tango shoot a federaI officer? -No comment.

Was Cash there too?

No comment.

What do they have?

They got a .380 with Cash's fingerprints.

They think it's the murder weapon. BaIIistics is checking it.

They were at the scene of the crime. No one was seen coming or going.

What eIse?

The tape is ready.

What tape?

-Show us the money. -lt's in the suitcase.

-Open it. -lt's all there.

-Count it if you want to. -We want to.

Where's the stuff?

Right here. Direct from the police lockup.

You know, l like dealing with cops. lt restores my low opinion of human nature. ln that case, you'll love this.

Lts. Ray Tango and Gabriel Cash, two highly-decorated officers...

...go on trial today...

...for slaying an undercover agent during a sting operation.

Tango and Cash insist...

... they are victims of a setup by criminal figures...

...aimed at taking the two cops out of action.

Expert witnesses will lead off the prosecution 's case.

Mr. Skinner, you've heard the tapes.

Can you make a judgment about its authenticity?

I have no reason to beIieve it isn't genuine.

How did you test this tape?

I took sampIes of the suspects. . .

. . .comparing them to the tape with an osciIIoscope.

They matched.

When this is over, remind me to rip his tongue out.

With a tow truck.

When I entered the premises, I saw the two suspects, the guns. . .

. . .the money, the drugs, the dead body.

When those guys showed up. . .

. . .I figured it's aII gone sour.

I was going to go and cIear everything up. . .

. . .when they kiIIed him.

When this is over, Iet's pay Jabba the Hutt a visit.

I 'II bring the chain saw.

I'II bring the beer.

Detective Cash assauIted me.

He put a chair on me and sat on it.

I couIdn't find a piano.

This bastard can speak EngIish!

The squarecrow can taIk!


What do you caII it?

As the attorneys for Tango and Cash left the courtroom...

... their mood can only be described as grim.

They face an uphill battle...

...if not an impossible one.

Ray, somebody set you up good. I feeI we shouId cop a pIea.

You can guarantee minimum security?

AbsoIuteIy. That wiII be the deaI.

Does Cash's attorney agree?

If he's smart, he does.

I want to taIk to Cash.

I need to work on my statement for the court.

What do you want?

First, to say I'm not fond of your kind.

What kind is that?

You're a gIory hound and a hot dog.

That stings.

TeII me when the critique is over.

It's over.

-My Iawyer wants me to cop a pIea. -Mine, too. 1 8 months.

Lompoc Country CIub.

The gym opens at 5 a.m. You can start pumping earIy.

-Who set us up? -I don't know.

I got a Iot of admirers. You?

A few.

Look, if we cop a pIea, we cop it together.

You mean that your Iawyer wanted you to make a deaI. . .

. . .but you didn't want to Ieave this gIory hound hoIding the bag, right?

-Right. -What a generous guy!

-I'II make the statement. -I wiII.

No way. You'II screw it up.

When's your birthday? When were you born?

-Why? -Day and month.

-You want to do my horoscope? -Just give me the month.

-May. -February.

I got seniority. I'II make the statement.

August 1 6.

I read your records. That's when you were hatched. August 1 6.

I got seniority.

AII rise.

The court is now in session.

The HonorabIe Judge McCormack presiding.

Be seated.

Your Honor.

The defendants wish to change their pIea.


Very weII, counseIor. What is the pIea?

Your Honor, may I approach the bench?

Proceed, Mr. Tango.

It's okay.

Your Honor, I've been a poIiceman for 1 2 years.

I think it's the best organization in the country.

I've been toId I'm too aggressive in capturing criminaIs.

If that is a sin. . .

. . .I'm guiIty.

I've aIways worked with good cops.

You are.

They're doing a tough job.

I onIy hope that with this triaI, the whoIe department. . .

. . .is not judged by what has transpired.

Thank you.

Not bad.

Have you anything to add, Mr. Cash?

-Yeah. -No!

Mr. Tango has spoken very eIoquentIy.

I wish I couId be as forgiving.

But I can't, because. . .

. . .this whoIe thing. . .

. . .fucking sucks!

This is a piIe of shit!

Your Honor!



Be seated, Mr. Cash.

Your Honor, the defendants wish to pIead no contest. . .

. . .to a charge of voIuntary mansIaughter.

This is part of an agreement?

Yes. The state recommends a sentence. . .

. . .of not more than 1 8 months in a minimum-security faciIity.

Mr. Cash, Mr. Tango, do you enter this pIea of your own free wiII?

Yes, sir.

The agreement is acceptabIe to the court.

The defense and the state wiII deIiver the proper documentation.

Court is adjourned.

Now that Tango and Cash are behind bars. . .

. . .you needn't be afraid anymore.

What's wrong, gentIemen? You don't share my enthusiasm.

Mr. Perret, I am sorry. . .

. . .but I cannot appreciate these games you keep pIaying.

Forgive me for asking, Mr. Perret. . .

. . .but what happens in 1 8 months when they get out?

Use your imagination.

What makes you think they'II ever get out again?

Now go take care of your business.

I got a feeIing this is going to be a great year.

Ever hear of shock absorbers?

WeIcome to CIub Fed.

What a vacation!

End of the Iine. Get out.

You, this way!

What do you have to say now, genius?

I don't think there's a goIf course here.

Make yourseIves at home sweet home, boys.

This is a mistake, right?

My underwear is riding into my throat.

They're not there?! They were on the bus!

I'm trying to trace them.

They were transferred off the bus near VictorviIIe.

We got to find them.

Your underwear probIem is soIved.

I noticed. You can stop hoIding in your stomach.

Come on! Somebody bribed the prison board! That's why we're here!

They're as crooked as everybody eIse in this deaI.

I'II teII you one thing. Whoever set us up is fucking connected.

Do you think it's Quan?


No, wait! I got it!

It's Lopez!

Lopez! FoIIow me through here.

Lopez has a guy pretend to try and kiII me. . .

. . .and cIaim that Quan hired him.

He feeds me bogus information about the setup.

Lopez figures, no matter what, I'II think it was Quan.

AII the time it's Lopez, and now I know it.

What do you think?

That with your I.Q., you're unarmed and stiII very dangerous.

If you're so smart, teII me who set us up, SherIock HoImes.

-I don't know yet. -You don't know shit!

What are you doing?



Don't fIatter yourseIf.


I don't know you that weII.

Don't worry. Someday the other one wiII drop.

You just keep taIking, tripod!

Sure, Minnie Mouse!

By the way. . .

. . .I bet they stick us in the generaI popuIation.

They don't put cops in generaI popuIation.

Never put cops in generaI popuIation, huh?

Cash, I'II Iight your fucking boweIs!

I'II stick brown sugar up your ass!

Shit, I put haIf these guys away.

Tango, you're going to be my bitch!

I'II kick your fucking ass!

You know what I hate?

-Litter. -Goddamn it!

I forgot the marshmaIIows.

I don't think rehabiIitation is working here.

They're just misunderstood.


Bring them to me!

Bring them to me!

Cops! Cops!

Bring them here!

Come here!

I want to taIk to you.

Hey, punk!

When I get out of here, I'II tear you a new ass.

You know Captain DynabaII here?

I Ioved you in Conan the Barbarian.

If you need me, me and my ass wiII be in the neighborhood.

You fucking pig! It's over for you!

You're going to be very popuIar here.

Funny, I don't see your fan cIub, either.

That crapper is mine!

And what am I supposed to use?

I don't give a shit! Just don't use that.

Okay, bud. We're going to get one thing straight right now.

That is yours!

WouId you mind stopping that?

Thank you.

I appreciate it.

I'm not afraid of you.

See that?

I kiIIed him.


He was my best friend.

Crazy peopIe fear no one.

Look at that!

Sugar is up. I cannot beIieve this!

Let's dance, Tango!

Come on, Cash!

Get the bag on him!

KiII him!

KiII the fucker!

You're dead meat, Tango!

They got you?

What's it Iook Iike?

Let me guess.

The weIcoming committee.

Either that or a surprise party.

Don't make a move.

We'II taIk our way out.

I doubt they're into smaII taIk.

If we panic, we're history.

The infamous. . .

. . .Cash and Tango.

Dishonored, imprisoned.

A shamefuI faII from gIory!

Who are you?

Just think of me as somebody who. . .

. . .doesn't Iike you much.

The surprise party is out.

Shit! That's the guy I foIIowed to the setup.

Don't panic.

Tarty Tango! You're a pretty boy, aren't you?

I'm panicking.

How wouId you Iike me to change it for you?

-I wouIdn't. -How about you?

Maybe you first.

Don't panic.

I'II cut your throat, yank your tongue out the hoIe. . .

. . .and tie it in a Windsor knot.

-I don't wear ties. -Brave boy!

You want to cut my throat?! Go ahead!

You want to cut off my head?

You can bowI with it! Just don't Iet him do it!

I don't want to get kiIIed. . .

. . .by this Iimey jerk-off!

I want to get kiIIed by an American jerk-off!

You wanker!

Put it away for now.

Just for now.

Some of your other friends want to say heIIo first.

What are you doing?

-Buying time. -For what?

I don't know yet.

Shit, it's Conan.

-We'II get FUBAR now. -What's FUBAR?

You'II see.

ReaI bad-ass cops!

You don't Iook so tough now.

Do you, you fuck?!

He means you.

This pig and his cop friends. . .

. . .broke my ribs, my Ieg and my jaw.

You broke that jaw?

He deserved it.

Why did you do that?

Why? I was having a bad day!

Like now?

Don't panic!

Don't panic!

Rats in a maze. . .

. . .men. . .

. . .in a cage.

PIace your bets! Which bIoke survives?

Who's brave?

Who fries first?

Cook, you bastard!

Tango, you got any famiIy?

Yeah. You?

I go steady with an aIimony check.

First, Mr. Cash.

No, don't do it.


It's alright, man

Fuck you.

Son of a bitch!



Fuck you


Fry, Tango

Get them the hell down!

Off the scaffoId!

Lock this pIace down!


You fight this one. I'm burned out.

You Iook Iike heII, Cash.

Matt, is it reaIIy you?

It is.

Am I gIad to see you!

My arm.

-Who's he? -Matt Sokowski, assistant warden.

My C.O. when I was a rookie.

You guys are in deep shit.


Who set you up?

I think we just met him.

If this creep wants us dead so bad, why doesn't he shoot us?

Why pIay this game?

He has a boring nightIife.

-How'd he get in? -Anything can happen here.

AII you need is cash. We have the best guards money can buy.

You got the bucks, you get what you need.

Once you're back in generaI popuIation, they'II naiI you.

You got onIy one choice: escape.


I'II get a spoon and start tunneIing. . .

. . .and you can chew through the bars. This is buIIshit!

What's with him?

He's upset. He misses his wardrobe.

What do we do?

Listen, I got a pIan worked out.

We trust him?

We've known each other 1 5 years.

-We trusted our Iawyers. -And the judge.

And that got us nowhere. Now trust me.

Now that is a risky proposition.

I got a present for you.

You're unbeIievabIe!

I do miss my wardrobe.

This is the ventiIation system.

Enter it from the utiIity shaft in the yard.

This main ventiIation shaft Ieads beyond the waII.

I can shut down one fan and Ieave this door unIocked.

I'II get you the right work detaiI and Ieave tooIs at the shaft.

This way Iooks faster.

-No, it's Ionger. -Let's stick to pIan A.

Let's get you to the infirmary.

Why your pIan A?

It's better than your pIan B, which you don't even have.

Not yet, but I wiII.

My partner in pain.

Sokowski got us trash detaiI. Let's go.

Whoopee! Race you to the dumpster.

It's set for now. Come on.


I'm not going.

Did you have a brain meItdown?

Look, I have an aversion to getting FUBAR.

-What's FUBAR? -"Fucked up beyond aII recognition. "

I don't trust Sokowski!

He's a cop, for Chrissake!

What's this?

My fiancée, SIinky.

Up, SIinky.

Let's see how business is.

You are one mistrustfuI, maIadjusted human fucking being!

I Iove you, too.

I'm not coming back for you.

You're making a big mistake.

You don't have to. Hope you make it, Cash.

Let's go, you're Iate!

I hope you and Cousin It. . .

. . .are very happy together. . .

. . .and raise a beautifuI Iitter.



You're haIf an hour Iate, asshoIe!

I'm doing my best, boss.


There he is!

Let's go!

Out of my way!

-What are you doing here? -I got IoneIy.

I can't hoId it aII day!


Come on, Cash!

This way!

Move it!

Your friend Matt waItzed you into a trap!

How couId you be so stupid?

Matt's dead.

They cut his throat ear to ear.


This is the way.

You'II Iike this. It's the best ride in the park.

This way!

-Know where you're going? -AbsoIuteIy.

-Sure you know where you're going? -Yes, exactIy!

Then get your ass up there!

Come on!

-This is the onIy way? -No.

We can go back. Let's go!

This way!

-You sure this is the way? -ExactIy!

Let's go! Sector 4!

Don't touch those wires.


-Know what? -What?

I 'm reaI tired of eIectricity.

Nag, nag, nag!

-Now what? -No probIem.

SIide down those wires and we're home free.

That's your pIan?

We'II fry.

You know anything about eIectricity?

If you onIy touch one wire and don't touch the ground, you're safe.


I don't know.

Me either.

I owe you from back there.

So you can go first.

-You'd stiII owe me. -I knew you'd say that.

If I don't make it, wiII you even try?

Depends how cIose you get.

What's wrong?

Come on, dog!

Come on, dog! HeeI!

Move it!

Come on, Tango!

Come on!

Speak, doggy!

That was fun.

Jesus Christ! What did you do, stop for coffee and Danish?

I hate Danish.

We have to get out of here.

-Nice doing time with you. -EspeciaIIy in the shower.

If it gets too hot in the streets. . .

. . .go to the CIeopatra CIub. Ask for Catherine.

-She'II know where I am. -Got it!

I reaIIy do owe you one.

Quan and Lopez on Iine one.

Put them on.

GentIemen, I've aIready heard about the escape.

Mr. Perret. . .

. . .this is most disturbing.

We are being threatened by two maniacs.

I think we must take some action.

There you go thinking again. That'II be the cause of your downfaII.

Try to controI your fear.

These men are convicted kiIIers and fugitives.

They won't Iast Iong on the outside.

Mr. Perret, we cannot reIy on the poIice. I insist--

Don't insist!

Insistent peopIe make me angry.

Everything is under controI.

Cover your tracks.

You're beautifuI!

Hope they're aII right.

Attention, commencing live fire test.


I knew you'd come here.

How'd you get out?

I need to change cIothes.

We have the same taste in cIothes.

Do you need a speciaI weapon?

I need a big gun.

Are those big enough?


I aIways knew we had the same taste in weaponry.

Check out my new invention in senior citizen home protection.

WeII, you know, the gun boots are great.

See you, buddy.

Knock, knock.

From the Iook of your diet, you're not counting caIories.

Too busy counting the money you got for setting us up?!

I didn't set you up.

Am I judging you unfairIy?

HeII, yes! I had nothing to do with it!

Nothing to do with it?

Can we be frank?

You're Iooking anemic.

You need. . .a IittIe iron in your diet.

You switched those weapons. . .

. . .and pIanted the murder weapon at the scene, didn't you?

They paid me.


I don't know.

You FBI guys are brainy. Think, think!

An EngIishman with red hair.

And a ponytaiI.

"You're going down for this. "

Remember those Iyrics? But you're going down.

It doesn't matter. They want me dead. My Iife isn't worth shit.

That's true. But I need you anyway.

Take me in! I'II teII them aII I know! We'II heIp each other.

I hope you got paid weII, WyIer.

Want to spIit it?

Who are you?!

Why are you here?

Who the heII do you think you are?

Excuse me!

Who hired you?

Lucky it's soundproof. Nobody wiII hear me beating the truth out of you.

You've got aII my greatest hits.

And Tango's.

You put together a nice compiIation.

He said he'd kiII me.

-Who? -He didn't say.

I swear!

And you got to authenticate your own work.

I am the foremost expert.

Not for Iong if you keep using this junky equipment.

It's state-of-the-art equipment.

What do you want to know?!

-How were you contacted? -By phone.

-How'd he get the tape? -By maiI.

I forgot the address.

But I recorded the conversation.

-I can pIay it for you. -Great!

Captain Schroeder, pIease.

He has to be there. WouId you check?

TeII him his favorite stockbroker is back in town.

$5 cover charge.

-Catherine here? -Who?

Don't know her.

Catherine here tonight?

We have Iots of Catherines.

Joe! Sticks!

-Where's my beer? -You're distracting me. Be right up.

Cover that exit. Come with me.

What do you think you're doing?

HoId it.

-Kiki, nice work. -Wait.

I'm Catherine.

OnIy one person caIIs me that.

Ray Tango said you couId heIp me find him.

I haven't seen Ray IateIy.

There's a poIice convention out there.

Is there somepIace eIse we can taIk?

Is he okay?

Not if I don't get out of here.

Through the aIIey.

They'II cover it.

Any other ideas?

Hey, EIvis!

What size are you?

HoId it.

Let's have a Iook.

Something wrong?

Let's go, Lynn!

Hey, Red.

Aerobics instructor?

Get your hands off my property.

Any chance of a three-way?

Dykes on bikes.

So you knew who I was aII aIong.

You and Ray have gotten Iots of press IateIy.

I bet.

We were set up good!

I know. Ray couIdn't have done aII the things he's accused of.

You I'm not so sure about.

God, how did this happen?

SIiding off a high-tension wire into pine trees at 40 mph. . .

. . .tends to sIip a disk or two.

Maybe we can sIip it back in.

-How's that? -Are you kidding?

Six or seven more hours of this and I'II be fine.

What's the story with you and Ray?

What do you mean?

You know. Do you Iove him? Hate him?

None of the above?

I Iove him.

You do?

Of course. He Ioves me, too. He just has a funny way of showing it.

You guys see a Iot of each other?

He comes and goes as he pIeases.

That's insensitive.

But I Iive my own Iife.

Good for you.





I'II move it around reaI sIow.

-Don't stop. -I can do this aII night.

Prove it.



-Deeper. -My God!

-I can feeI it going in! -Harder!

It's aImost in!

God! It's aII the way in!

Hey, sIeazebag!


Do you screen aII your guests?


Freeze! Drop the duck!


Great poIice work! Way to stay on top of it, Cash!

-What are you doing? -Nice to see you too.

You aImost naiIed your captain.

At Ieast I saw him! What were you doing in there?

I was getting ready to make my move.

-Your girIfriend? -My sister!

My what?

My sister.

That's great! I don't mean that.

I know it Iooks bad.

I never deIiberateIy punched out anyone in my Iife.

But I'II hammer you into the Iawn.

Don't you know how to use a doorbeII?

Just stick out your finger and push.

Isn't this 1 25 Orange Grove Street?

It's my pIace. I have some rights in my own pIace!

It's my roof, my house, and I Iet you dweII here.

I pay rent!

-It's Iate. -Check your maiI!

In Tango's defense, he has been in prison.

Excuse me, my pantyhose are riding into the unknown.

Way up in the unknown.

TeII me one thing, seriousIy.

What were you doing on the couch with Queen-for-a-Day?

None of your business.

Catherine. . . .

She got the brains and the Iooks. How do you figure it?

I don't.


AII right, that's it!

Are you running us in?

No, but I can onIy keep the department off your backs for 24 hours.

The feds are on the case!

SIip into something a IittIe more butch.

Get rid of Daffy Duck and cIear your names.

AIready started.

What's that?

This tape wiII cIear our names.

CompIiments of the forger.


Yeah. So what have you got?

A quarter to four.

Start here.

We ID'd that creep from the warehouse.


His name's Requin.

Look him up. The address is right there.

You got 24 hours to find the guy who set you up.

-When's the cIock start? -5 minutes ago.

HonestIy. . .

. . .what did you do with the EIephant Man?


Come in the house. Change cIothes.

You'II make a very ugIy bride someday.

Are you proposing?

-BIue one's nice. -BIue it is!

Sorry about my behavior tonight.

I want you to be okay.

I'm okay.

I can't beIieve it. How did you get out of prison?

Cash had a friend on the inside.

Sorry, I had nowhere to go but here.

Where eIse are you supposed to go?

-The North PoIe? -SeriousIy, what wiII you do?

Maybe you shouId turn yourseIf in.

TaIk to the press.

-How's the career at the cIub? -That's great!

You're being hunted and you worry about my dancing?

I'm not worried.

If you need a IittIe extra cash, I can buy you a bond or something.

It's seven and a quarter yieId.

Big money.

You heIp too much.

No, I don't.

I work so much, I don't get a chance to see you.

Don't feeI guiIty.

I Iove you.

Put her there.

Push 'em back, way back!

I've got to go. I can't put you in jeopardy.


I have fiIth and scum to deaI with.

I'm here!


Let's go.

See you.

-Mind if I taIk to her? -No.

I want to say I had a wonderfuI time. . .

. . .untiI Captain Fantastic Ieaped in and smashed through your door.

When this is straightened out, couId we get together again?

Yeah, that wouId be nice.

We couId go to the baIIpark--

Can I taIk to you?

I don't think my sister is your type.

Easy, mate.

Come on.

I expected you.

PonytaiIs are out this season. How are you, Cash?

Getting better by the second.

-Party on the roof. -Can I invite Mr. Potato Head?

WouIdn't be a party without him!

PIan A.

Fun party!

Thanks. Requin, it's a heII of a view!

Who puIIs your strings?!

Piss off! BoIIocks to pIan A!

I Iike this. The view's great up here!

What'd he say?

PIan A's a Ioser.

HoId on. Give me a name, Death Breath, or you'II end up in a baggie!

Up yours, asshoIe! You ain't worth a toss.

Drop me.

Do it!

PIan A's a Ioser.

Big time! Go to pIan B.

You got one?

Hiroshima. Ring a beII?

Can we taIk?

Not now, I'm busy.

Just a second, please Seriously, you're getting a IittIe radicaI?


BIowing a man's head off with a hand grenade is a touch much.

You got your way, I got mine.

I'm gIad you don't want to taIk.

He'II taIk if I shoot him in the Ieg.

I want aII of him!

Maybe he doesn't know anything.

-I don't care! -What?

You're a cop!

I was a cop! But we're on the run because of this dirtbag!

It's payback!

That's enough!

I heard about you.

You're a Section 8.

I didn't beIieve that weird buIIshit. . .

. . .but you're for reaI!

If you don't want to get sticky, get back. . .

. . .Jack.

You got it, sicko.

You bIew it, paI. He's out of controI and I can't stop him.

I'm not going down for this.

I'm gone!

So Iong!

You got my vote for Psycho HaII of Fame, asshoIe!

You reaIIy do Iook Iike shit in a ponytaiI.

No. I'm sorry.

Bye-bye, birdy. Bye, baby!

I don't want to hear it.

Perret! You want Yves Perret!

Who's he?

The bIoke with me in prison.

-Where's he now? -The desert. Ryko AirfieId.

Think it's true?

It's not raining and he's in a puddIe.


You feII for the oIdest routine in the book. Bad cop. . . .

Worse cop!

You sIeep with my sister?


Did you two bump ugIies?

I was so drunk, I don't remember.

Come on, worse cop, we're Iate.

My contribution to birth controI.

BIoody heII!

BIoody dud.

-What about my sister? -It's a free country.

-Meaning? -Everyone is free.

And your sister is very free.

I'II kiII you.

Ok, what's happening?

Oh, my God!

DoubIe-armored, buIIetproof gIazing.

1 20mm cannon on the driver's side.

Transfer case has torque spIitting.

It'II see 60 in 5 1 /2 seconds and puII high-tens in the quarter.

What is that?

That is an RV from heII. Care to join me?

-So? -I'm impressed.

-Very impressed? -Very.

Does he have gray matter, or what? Owen, gone! Home run!

This wiII go through a brick waII.

-We are in business. -That we are.

Do you know the firepower we've got here?

This is a vioIent work of art!

Who hoIds the pink sIip? Satan?

Take a Iook inside.

Didn't he invent your bazooka boots?

Owen has miIIiseconds of genius.

What's this?

UItra-booster. It's nitrous oxide.


Who cares? We'II take it.

No, you can't It's one of a kind, a prototype.

Trust us. We won't even scratch it.

We're fuIIy insured.


Run Perret through the computer.

Okay. I'II see what I can dig up.

Is Owen famiIy?


Ryko Airfield was abandoned by the Air Force 10 years ago. lt's in private hands now. There's construction...

...but the main building is a mile from the perimeter.

Thanks, Owen.

Looks quiet.

This is insane.

Very insane.

Things are about to get bIoody.

They couId.

If one of us doesn't make it, I want you to know that. . .

. . .you're the best cop I've worked with.

I want you to know something, Ray.

If you don't make it back and I do. . .

. . .I wiII date your sister.

I got nothing against you.

I don't want Catherine to get that 2 a.m. phone caII. . .

. . .saying something's happened to you.

I don't want her to Iive Iike that.

Nothing wiII happen to me. I'm charmed.

I'II teII you what. I'II stay away. . .

. . .untiI you give me your bIessing. Fair enough?

In that case. . .

. . .never.

Thought so.

Time to work. Something's on the computer.

The information on Perret.

-We're at the Iocation. -And a very serious gate.

-Is this pIace fortified? -Don't know.

Use extreme caution.

Listen to him.

Yes, Mommy.

My God!

ReaI subtIe!

We're in!

Let's get out!

Come on.

It Iooks Iike we're in a goddamn pit!

Come on!

To the right!


I'm going for it!

ReaI subtIe!

Where'd you Iearn to drive?

Stevie Wonder.

-We're on fire! -We're cooking now!

-It's a dead end! -We're in a goddamn maze!

We're bIocked!

He's pIaying with us!


Come on!

Get the sons of bitches!

-Do you want the good news or bad news? -The bad.

We're aImost out of gas.

The good?

We're aImost out of gas.

He must own a used car-Iot.

Take them!

AII right! That's the Iast of them!

Home team!

-Behind you! -What is that?!

Not the WeIcome Wagon!


What's that noise?

Don't worry. A few speed bumps!

Let's get out of here!

I need a gun!

Are you hoIding out on me?

Why is yours bigger than mine?

Genetics, peewee.

Why aren 't you guys talking to me anymore? Say something.

Perret has to be in there.

It's the onIy buiIding Ieft standing.

Any chance he'II surrender?

Not IikeIy.

Remember. . .

. . .use extreme caution.


Nice coIIection.

Toys for tots.

No more owes-ies. We're even.

-Why? -I just saved your Iife.

We'II discuss it Iater.

Let them come.

We are ready.

Bombs for tots.

Facility destruct sequence...

...now engaged.

Somebody activated a bomb.

Wonder who.

-How do we stop it? -We don't. We get Perret.

Get me a toy, too.

We onIy got 1 1 minutes.

The Raiders had 3 touchdowns in 1 1 minutes.

But they had 3 time-outs.


Look out!

You okay, Cash?

-CIean exit. -You're Iucky.

I've been shot before. Never feIt Iucky about it.

Stop compIaining.

-Right side. -Got it.

-Some hobby! -We got our own TV show.

Let's get out.

Not yet. Game's just starting.

Over here.

Let her go!

AII right, Requin.

You want me? You got me.

I got you both now.

Two for the price of one.

Pretty boy's trying to get the drop on me.

Drop your fucking gun or I'II drop sister here!

Drop your gun, Cash.

I can take him.

Drop your goddamn gun!

I drop it. . .

. . .and we're both dead and you know it.

If you don't drop it, we aII go up.

Recognize pIan B?

She fancies me.

Might even Iose her head over me. Know what I mean?

You don't know my mate here.

He's Iooking forward to kicking your brains in.

Ain't you?

WeII, pretty boy. . .

. . .I'd Iike you to watch me. . .

. . .pIeasure your sister sIow and easy.

But I onIy got a few minutes to carve you up!

We never taIked about pIan C, asshoIe.

FUBAR. Big time.

Find Catherine.

When the Great Scorer comes to write against your name, He'II mark. . .

. . .not that you won or Iost. . .

. . .but how you pIayed the game.

What buIIshit!

This game has cost me!

I'II bIow him into the ozone.

Know which one?

I do.

I Ieave you with this thought.

AII you need is a gun.

Got it.

So do I.

Let's take him aIive.


One. . . .

-My sights are off. -Mine too.

Cash, get the door!

Hurry up!

-She all right? -Yeah.

How'd you know who to shoot?

The ring.

No, the monogram.

It was reversed.

-What about the ring? -On the wrong hand.

Are we cIever or what? Let's bIow this pIace.

20 seconds, Cash.

There's a Iot more poIIution in the sky tonight and it's caIIed Perret.

Kiki, are you okay?

I'm okay, I'm just worried about you.

Thanks. I'II Iose my arm because I saved him.

Catherine, it's a scratch.

Cash, you got sIoppy and stumbIed.

SIoppy? I took that hit for you!

After aII I've done for you, you're stiII ungratefuI.

For me?

This is no time to argue.

He can't accept that he's the number two cop.

He can't handIe it.

Dream on. You got your version, I got the truth.

Admit that you guys work weII together.

No matter what you say, Ray. . .

. . .I've at Ieast earned the right to date your sister.

Over my dead body.