Taxi (2004) Script

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Thirteen minutes, 54 seconds. That's a new record! Yeah!

Yes, boy! What you gonna do with the girl but love her and pay her.

Give me my money. Give me my money. You still owe me.

Hey, everyone, shut the hell up for a second here.

As you know, today is Belle's last day.

Now, I'll tell you this... you're the best man I've ever had.

Come on, now.

Listen. I just want you to know, I just stayed ahead of you... because I know you enjoyed the view.

The view.

Anyway, we're all real proud of you for finally getting your taxi license.

Knowing you're behind the wheel in a taxi in our fair city... makes us wanna move to Albany.

I seen these sparkling in a window, I knew they had your name on it.

I thought it'd be perfect for you. Check it out. You'll love it.

Oh, wow. This is you, girl.

Oh, my God.

It's a titanium supercharger! Oh, my God!

That's gonna be some taxi, Belle.

It's just my size too! That's right, baby.

Please don't leave. I don't wanna go.

Time's up, man. Get your hands off my girl.

Get off me, man. Hey, baby.

Whoo!

Shut up. All right, back to work!

I gotta get the package there with a horse and buggy.

What you doing here? I took the rest of the day off.

All right. Wait a minute.

Wait, who you wearing perfume for? What?

Oh, no, no. I cut through Macy's. I got tagged.

Why, you like it? Is it me?

Let me tell you something. There's only one thing I like on you.

What's that? And that's me.

I got you a little something too.

What? Hold on. You'll find out tonight.

After our mind-blowing romantic dinner, date...

and et cetera.

Oh, hell, no. Don't tell me you forgot. No. Of course not.

I can't wait, baby. I know I may not be as exciting...

As that titanium thing. You saw it?

Whatever, baby. Just trust me.

I just got a 4:00 appointment at the Taxi Commission to pick up my license.

I'll be out of there by 4:30. Then I'm all yours.

B.

4:00 was five minutes ago.

Oh, shoot! I love you, baby! Later, guys!

Hey, lady, come on! I got an appointment.

No, no, no. No cut.

I got an appointment. Everybody here with appointment.

We take number like bakery. Go to the back, do not come here.

Right here. Ticket. Right there, take it.

Hundred thirty-eight?

Man.

Oh, he bought candles.


I'll make it up to you, baby.


Hey! What the hell is your problem?

Come on, let's go. What the hell is wrong with you, man?

Cabby, I need to get to JFK in 15 minutes.

One hundred bucks, I make it.

Whoo.

Done.

You jumped in the right cab today.

Oh, yeah.

I don't usually stop for white guys. My way of balancing the universe.

That's 14 minutes.

Buckle up for safety, mother...


If I miss this flight, it wouldn't be the end of the world.

No, don't worry. We'll be able to speed up once we hit the highway.

Come on, man, what'd I do?

Hey, look here, Hugo Boss, you might wanna hold on.


Nine minutes, 28 seconds. Damn, I'm good!

You know... Damn.

I'm good. I am good.


Don't you scratch them, you idiot.

Frank, man, where's your friend at? He'll be here.

It's all right.


Where's this guy, man?

He'll be here.

This is the guy?

Yeah, that's him.

Let's do this.

It's cool, right? Right. It's cool.

Come on.

They're in.

You know the drill, Frankie.

We're going to the fifth floor. Number 22, okay?

And don't try nothing.

This is an easy bust, Washburn. Don't do anything fancy. We clear?

Yeah. Nothing fancy, that's cool.

Stick to the plan.


It's okay. It's good.

Got the money?

No, no. Wait, wait.

I don't like it. I thought you said these guys are from Cuba, like us.

What's the matter? I'm not speaking to you.

You not from Cuba, okay? No, no, no. Forget it. Forget it, okay?

You know what? I don't like this. No.

You don't like it. I don't like it.

Okay, man? I don't like it!

You don't like it? You no speak English?

I don't like it. Read my lips. I smell something. What do I smell?

What do I smell?

I smell a setup. What am I smelling here?

What do I smell? Pig! Okay, man?

Don't do this. Okay?

You telling me that you don't trust me? That's what you saying?

I'm only gonna say this once, okay?

Your friend better come out from behind that door. Okay?

Or I'm gonna put a window in him.

Man.


Okay?

He okay, man. You're okay.

What part of Cuba you from?

Havana. Havana?

We from Havana. Cigar!

I love this guy.

The three of us are the same.

We must be brothers, eh? Who's your mother?

I tell you something right now. You guys are ever in...

Let's go. You ever in Havana, give me a call.

We'll have tequila, cerveza, okay? Mi Costco es su Costco.

He funny.

What part? What part?

You ask me where I'm from? What part am I from?

What part of Havana? Yeah.

You know, I live over on the corner of Castro Street.

You know?

So...

The show's over, pigs!

You all right? Goddamn it, Washburn!

How could there not be a Castro Street in Cuba?

Shut up, Washburn. Am I right?

Hey, stop! They're getting away!

Come on, let's go.

You can't drive like that. Give me the keys.

Come on, come on! No, I insist.

Give me the keys!

Okay.

Be careful. All right, I'll be careful.

Put my seat belt on.

Okay, my hands at 10 and 2.

Okay, I'll just move the seat up... Okay. Okay.

Like that. Too close. Back more.

Back more, back more, back.

Little back. Back.

That's good. All right, mirror's checked. I can see back.

Washburn, maybe...

I got it! I got it, man! Hand signal because I'm coming out. Coming out!

There! Go! Go! Here we go! Rock 'n' roll, dude! Yeah!

Washburn!


That's funny.

Get in here now.

I'm sorry, Marta.

Lieutenant. I'm sorry, lieutenant.

Andy, I know this is hard for you, especially coming from me.

Feels weird calling you lieutenant. You may not have to much longer.

I mean, look at this. There's $40,000 in damages, Andy.

This is two lawsuits here. And this.

Your face on the cover.

There's a better picture than that. Shut up.

I'm sorry, Andy, but this is just not easy for me.

Look, you're a good cop... you're a terrible driver. What is it with you?

Everyone has their weaknesses, okay? Superman has kryptonite.

Indiana Jones, snakes. You know, Whitney Houston has Bobby Brown.

Or vice versa.

I try to make the department look good, make you look good.

You look great, by the way. I'm not saying you don't. You're not like:

You know, you look... Okay. Enough.

You look like a lieutenant.

Beautiful. Hot.

Professional. Three cars you totaled.

Cop or no cop, that is 11 points on your license. It's gone.

Don't take my license. Gone.

Come on, don't do...

You're not gonna need it for your next assignment.

Sorry, babe, but that line at the TLC was ridiculous.

I cooked for hours. Come on. Look, all right.

Wine, satin sheets, even candles.

You realize what I went through to get that license? I won't be late.

Well, you better not be, because today...

I pulled out all the stops. Baby, I promise I won't, for real.

Five o'clock, at the restaurant.

All units, all units, robbery in progress.

Manhattan Savings and Loan, 36th and Broadway.

Suspects armed and dangerous.

Freeze! Police officer! I'm gonna need your car for official...


I love you too. Bye.

Hi, 36th and Broadway, Manhattan Savings and Loan. Step on it.

That's only two blocks up... Step on it! Thank you.

Okay.

Okay, that'll be $2.30.

Hey, I'm on a beat, man!

Now you owe me 5... Get out of the way!

Freeze!

You! We got a hot pursuit. Go! Do what?

You owe me 5 bucks! Maybe I wasn't clear.

I'm commandeering your vehicle.

Follow that car. Don't worry about speed limit, lights, nothing.

Oh, man.

All right, but I'm still running this meter.

Here we go. Hold this for me.

Hang on.


Yo, man, be careful with that!

Careful don't bag the bad guys.

Fake left, go right. I'll lay suppressing fire... down from my "pistolita" here...

My goodness. Did you just...? Drive! Drive the car!

Don't look at me, look at the road.

Come on.

What the...? Oh, come on, now.

Come on. What the hell are you doing?

Can't... Gotta get it.

Watch it. You... The steering wheel.


What the hell?

Why'd you stop for? Hey, man, watch that thing!

Dead end. They ain't going nowhere.

Let's do this, baby. Get my burn on.

You talking to me or the gun? You better not be talking to me.

There's nowhere to run!

Damn.

Damn.


Damn! I know, they got away. Damn!

You shot my taxi! You calm down now, ma'am!

Calm down. No need to get upset. No need to get upset? What?

You out of your mind? I've been working on this car for five years.

Who is gonna pay for that? Hey! See this?

This is a badge, okay? That means you're not allowed to scream at me.

Come on, now, give me the badge.

Come on, give it back. Come on, now. Give me that. Give it!

Hand it over, cabby! Nice and easy!

All right. Damn, be cool.

Be cool? I had to flip and pull this out of my ankle holster.

Now, give me that and shush! Okay. Be cool.

All right. Here, take your badge, man. All right.

Yeah. Okay, now what?

How you like it being pointed at you?

Quick, give me, give me... Drop your weapon! Hands in the air!

Freeze! It's okay, I'm a police officer!

Okay, slowly show me your badge.

Okay. Give me the badge. No.

Give me the badge. No!

Throw it over here.

I can't.

She's got it.

Freeze! Wait, wait, wait!

I said, freeze...

Washburn. Washburn.

He's such a loser.

Is he in there?

Washburn!

Washburn... you took a cab to a bank robbery?

You thought that was okay? Well, yeah. Yeah.

I was the closest to the scene.

If you hadn't taken my wheels... I didn't take them.

You drove through a bodega. You killed Detective Manuel's parrot.

Manuel knew what he was risking with the parrot on the stakeout.

I can't believe you. So ridiculous.

Of all pets, I mean, it's the one that talks.

What is that smell?

I know, I let you down. Mm-hm.

So see what's happening?

You're getting emotional, and you're taking it way too personally.

Personally? Yeah.

I'm your lieutenant! Of course I'm pissed.

Come on, Marta. You know what I'm talking about here. I'm talking about us.

Us. What?

Us. Talking about us.

You think that I... And you... I got it.

Got that. I'm with you.

What?

Mm-hm.

Okay, thank you. I'll be right there.

The FBI's here.

I'm gonna do something to you later.

Washburn!

So did you pay by the mile, or is there a flat rate for chasing bank robbers?

Quiet. Quiet.

Please give your attention to Agent Mullins, FBI Armed Robbery Unit.

Thank you.

This is tape of this morning's robbery. Watch close. It goes by pretty fast.

Four cameras, four perfect shots.

In and out in 35 seconds. Lieutenant, you have the witnesses' statements.

Miss Williams, I'm Lieutenant Robbins. This is Agent Mullins, with the FBI.

We wanna ask you a few questions. Am I under arrest?

Well, no. Then I ain't answering no questions... until somebody tells me who's paying... for my cab and when do I get it back.

Your vehicle is physical evidence now.

We have to run ballistics tests. Ballistics tests? On what?

We already know who shot my cab!

It was that idiot there with that dumb look on his face.

That's not fair. He wasn't on the scene. I'm talking about you.

Me? Shot my window out, could've shot me!

Don't talk to me like that! I'll talk how I want.

Get him out. Take his stinking ass out of here.

All right, all right. I'm sorry. Are you kidding me?

That is the FBI in there. You need to calm down.

Somebody better talk to him.

Sorry about that, dude. Sir.

The adrenaline's still pumping. Had a crazy morning.

I'm a little out of line, and I apologize.

You were the first one on the scene, correct?

Yes. I was the first one on the scene.

My first instinct is to give you a shot at leading this investigation.

However, I spoke with your lieutenant. You're off the case.

Permanently. What?

Nice meeting you.

I know.

Marta, you can't... Lieutenant, you... Enough.

Now, go clock in. You're late for your shift.

I already told you everything I know.

You can't hold me. Now, I want my cab.

Says you did a year in juvenile hall. That's sealed.

Joyriding. Graduated to reckless driving... fleeing the scene of an accident. Moving violation, moving violation...

Come on, everybody got a few tickets. Not 75.

And not on a bicycle, Miss Williams.

Officers at the front will give you the forms you need.

You'll get your car back when we're done with it. Two weeks.

Two weeks? Come on, man, this is bullshit!

That's not just my car, that is my job!

What am I supposed to do? Give piggyback rides to Newark Airport?

One more question:

Did you ever get close enough to see the guy driving the car?

No, sir.

All I saw was their taillights.

Can I go now?

Didn't I say 5:00? Where the hell are you?

I'm a fool, thinking you'd be here on time.

I tried. No, no, no.

I'm tired of hearing excuses, okay? I'm sitting in my cab, right?

All of a sudden, out of nowhere, this guy jumps... Hello? Baby.

Jesse.

What the hell could be so damn important?

After the freaking day I had. Hey, Miss Williams.

Miss Williams. Hey, hey! You again!

Go ahead, talk. I just wanna talk. I can get your cab.

Come on.

You gotta help me first.

Okay, just hear me out.

Five detectives on this case. We gotta catch these guys first.

All I got to go on is the M.O., modus operandi. That's police jargon for...

I know what it means. And it's not police jargon. It's Latin.

Whatever. It's both.

They were pretty quick. In and out in under a minute. Real pros.

Witnesses said they're Spanish or Italian.

Brazilian. They were speaking Portuguese.

You sure?

My first job was delivering food at Gauchos de Newark.

Brazilian. This is huge.

Why are we not doing this at the station?

A good cop has gotta bend the rules so that laws don't get broken.

Know what I'm saying? I'm not afraid to live outside the law.

You're living outside of your mind, that's where you live.

Reports here say that the man driving is 5'10".

Nope. No, no, no. If that was a man, so am I.

She looked like a model. Tan, blondish hair.

All right, as I was saying, it was a woman driving... and she was driving a Mercedes...

An Aud... No. No, no.

She was driving... Definitely, you saw her driving a BMW?

Right.

Yeah, but not just a BMW, it was a 760.

But the engine sounded lighter. Light. Yeah.

With that much torque, she had to have a torsion-damper system crank... and double-wishbone arrangement.

Wait a minute. You shot her tire out.

Yeah. Standard OP.

That's police jargon for... But she kept on going.

Because she had run-flats. Yeah, that's what I thought.

She had runs-flats on.

Armored tires. They seal themselves with gel when punctured.

They good, but they only go for about 50 miles.

If she wants to drive that car again, she'll need a new tire.

There's only one place to get that tire here, Lou's Garage in Secaucus.

What are we waiting for? Let's hit it. We'll take my ride.

There's my baby, right there.

This is your unmarked car? We found her.

A Daewoo?

Man, I know people. I can't be seen in this thing.

Open the door. I don't wanna get Daewoo on my hands.

Buckle up for safety, everybody.

Hard to do it with my holster on.

Okay, we're good.

Good, wipers work. Ten and 2. Mirrors work.

And here we go.

Damn.

Little ding. Man!

That's why you got bumpers, kid. That's why you got bumpers.

You trying to kill me? I'm not a perfect driving robot!

What are you doing? Here comes junior.

You can't... Oh, shit! Wait. Stop, stop!

What the hell are you trying to do, a 78-point turn?

Can you get us out of this spot?

Yes. Everyone just chill out.

Be real cool about it.

Well, goddamn!

Now, I'm turning the wheel. Turning the wheel.

What the...? Oh, my God! Wait! Wait!

Hold, hold! Wait. No, stop.

What?

What? What do you want?

What's the problem? Get over there.

I got... I got shotgun. Get your ass over there.

You got insurance? That's what I'm gonna need. Daggone whiplash.

You got a driver's license? Let me get my belt on.

Who gave you a driver's license? That's what I wanna know.

After I show you this place, I get my cab back?

Deal. I don't trust you.

Soon as I know this is the place... we'll go back to the station, I get you your cab back.

This is it? Yep.

If they getting that car fixed, they... They gotta come here.

So, what now?

We wait.


You can open your eyes now. I'm done.

You didn't see my nads, did you?

Man. So you got guy problems?

Overheard you and your man on the phone.

Want a little bit of wisdom from the man's side?

I'll give it to you.

Men are like cats. You know?

Sure, we'll play with a ball of yarn.

Unless you want us to play with the ball of yarn.

Trick is, hide the ball of yarn.

Don't hide it where you can't find it, you know?

"What's the ball of yarn doing in the fridge?"

Whatever. You know what I'm saying?

Cops are supposed to talk on stakeouts.

It helps the mission go by faster. Would you please shut up?

Okay. That's cool. You wanna be quiet?

That's cool. No room for chitchat. That's fine.

I don't care. I don't need to... I don't need to talk.

We'll just sit here in silence.

So you into cars, or...?

I mean, what got you into cars?

I mean, were you always into them? Did you just, like, stumble upon them?

Damn. My grandpa. Okay?

Yeah. What, he loved driving or...?

Yeah, he was a mechanic.

Taught me everything I know.

We used to live next to a track. You go to the track all day? That's fun.

No, we didn't really go that much.

I mean, we went to a couple races.

But, mostly, we would just listen to the races together.

We could hear those cars, those engines.

I got good. I got to the point where I could tell... who won the race without even seeing it.

Yeah, drive a NASCAR, that's my dream.

Wait, let me ask you something.

Why would you take a taxi to a bank robbery?

I mean, I have never seen that.

I got in a wreck in my last gig.

Bad guys got away. My lieutenant flipped out... put me back on the beat.

No vehicle. Oh, man.

What makes it worse, me and my lieutenant used to date.

Yeah, we went to academy together. Okay.

She got promoted...

I didn't.

You can cut the sexual tension with a knife.

Look. There they are.

Oh, man. Yep, that's her.

That's her.

Party time.

So, what we gonna do now? We gonna call it in, right?

Call it in? By the time we get backup, that soup will be cold. We go in now.

Shoot. Oh, my God.

Daewoo, I'm sorry. I take back everything I said. Start for me.

Hi.

I'm not actually with him. He's...

You okay?

Yeah.

Damn.

What are they saying? The redhead is saying... she doesn't wanna kill a cop. If we play it cool...

Then they'll leave us here, tied up. Okay. Okay, I'll play it real cool.

Okay. Hey, what was that wink for? Hey, trust me.

No, no, no, man. What...? What was that about?

Trust me. Trust you?

Yeah. Trust you again? Hell, no. No way.

No, no. Hey, excuse me!

Excuse me. No. Excuse me.

Excuse me! Hey! Excuse me.

Don't mean to interrupt. He's gonna do something. He winked.

Hey, what's wrong with you? With me? I got a problem getting shot.

Did you frisk him? Come on.

Frisk his ass again. He got at least one more gun.

Cavity-search him. I do not! I swear.

He got a gun, and he's gonna use it.

He crazy. Whose side are you on?

Mine! What?

You want a strip search? Is that what you want?

There's nothing up my sleeve here. You wanna check my shoes?

Go!

All right, you're all under...

Man, you're more dangerous than they are!

What are you doing, man?

I'm evening the playing field.

That's flammable gas. They won't shoot. This whole place will blow.

Man, we still in this place, you jackass!

Turn that off, and let's wait for the cops to come. The real cops.

Oh, my G... Oh, man!

You smell that, ladies?

That's nitrous! One shot, and boom!

Now, you wanna handle this hand to hand, man to chick... then we'll go home!

Hello?

Hello? Ace Dumbtura, they're gone.

They're gone!

They're gone! They're gone! They're not there.

Come on, we gotta go. Oh, damn.

This thing's jammed.

Oh, man.

Dumb-ass.

You can't... You can't die from nitrous oxide, can you?

It's laughing gas, stupid.

I hate you, man. What's that?

I hate your freaking guts.

You gotta be the dumbest cop I ever met.

We gotta go. We gotta get out of here.

We gotta get out. Okay, open the door.

Open the door, man! Move.

You stupid.

You're so freaking dumb.

Oh, wait, your car is on fire.

No. Come on. Daewoo can't take a little heat.

Drop the weapon!

Freeze! Oh.

Okay, this does not look good.

Here's the plan, all right? Ready? When he comes by...

Or that.

Wait for me! Belle! Wait up!

They've gone around the backside of the building. We need to go.

I'll tell you what, we'll go back to the station...

Search the files, see which... No, no. Hell, no.

We ain't going nowhere. You coming to my house... to tell my boyfriend where I was.

I had a man when I went to work today.

Okay.

That's the least I can do. Damn straight.

The most you could do would be to get my cab back.

You'll get your cab back when I catch these guys. Girls. Women.

Not before.

I'm getting a little seasick.

I swallowed it.

I don't know if this will work. Show your badge... because he is sensitive, and he is pissed off.

All right. I got your back right here. I owe you one.

What the hell? Jesse!

Baby, you home?

Wait. I can explain. I was with this guy.

Go home with him. I'm tired of your apologies.

Don't take that tone with me. I ain't apologizing.

Don't take that tone! I've been waiting! Because you all screaming at me!

I got this. I can handle this, all right? I can totally handle this.

What's up, bro? How you doing, man? Yeah.

Here's the deal-y, yo.

It seems weird, your girl hanging with a good-Iooking white dude... but, hey, I'm a cop.

My name's Detective Washburn.

At least let me explain! Oh, no, not again.

He's gonna give it back, right?

What's that sound?

Blowtorch.

Blowtorch! Hey, Jesse! Thank you.

Can I have my...?

At least let me explain! Man.

Damn!

Man. Well, I always wanted a money clip.

What the hell was that?

It was my badge.

You know what? Forget it. I'm gonna let him cool off.

Hey, wait up. I know you for seven hours...

I lose my cab, my boyfriend and my apartment.

You're batting a thousand. Yeah?

It's not enough you screw up your own life. This your place?

No. We're stopping to get something to eat.

You actually have a girlfriend?

Ma! Hi, Ma. Sweetheart!

I love you! I love you!

Ma, I brought company.

Nice catch. Jungle fever.

Well, you know me.

Excuse me. I'm not his girlfriend.

I ain't even his friend.

Mom, Belle here is a cab driver, and she witnessed a bank robbery.

She needs a place to stay. Get in here. Come in.

Come in.

Oh, you must be starving.

I have got the number of a joint that makes a General Tso's chicken.

It'll knock you on your goddamn ass.

Your mom's drunk? Always.

Where's my Daewoo?

Andy, did you do something to my car? Don't.

Andy. What?

Look at me, darling.

You didn't drive through another bodega?

That was you? What...? What...?

That was you on the cover of the Post!

You killed that parrot. No.

Mom, what'd I tell you about talking police business?

Sorry. He had a mustache.

I didn't recognize you at first.

See, they took his license away. That was the third car he totaled.

He even wrecked one of those armored machines...

With the battering rams. Who the hell gave him one of those?

He just mowed down three mailboxes, like that. That's a federal offense.

Yeah. Mom!

But Andy is not a really strong driver.

He had a bad experience when he had his first driving lesson...

So... Driving lesson?

You call that a driving lesson? Yes.

Dad let go and said, "Steer or you'll kill the family."

Yeah. It's good for you. We were going 90. I was 6.

And that's the way he taught you to swim.

I can't swim either. Yes, you... Well...

Can we drop it? Okay.

Sure. Right. Okay, Ma, lock it... nd down your brassiere it goes. Okay.

Oh.

Mommy's getting the spins.

That's it for me.

That's it. That's it for the kid.

Why don't you take good care of this little girl.

Daddy will be so proud of you. Thank you.

Good night. Good night.

Nice to meet you. Oh, nice to meet you too.

Yes. Yes.

She'll be back. My drink?

There it is.

Don't forget that. Mom, the bedroom's that way.

Okay, sweetheart.

Oh, you're just getting the blender. Oh, yeah.

That's... That's a 38-ounce blender, yeah.

It is getting late. Do you wanna crash at my place until your dude cools off?

Like I have a choice.

Stop playing. You live next door to your mom's?

Makes her feel safe.

She must not have seen you in action?

Oh, God, it feels good to lay down.

Good night.

What kind of grown-ass man lives 10 feet away from his mama?

I wouldn't talk so much, Isabelle Precious Williams.

Who told you about my name?

It's in your record, Precious.

"My precious." Go ahead. Say it again.

Say it again, see what happens. I dare you.

Precious.

I just remembered something the girls kept saying to each other:

Yeah, that's what I said.

That means "two more withdrawals."

I want five cars on 14th and Broadway, waiting, and I want them now!

Hey, I've made a major break Get out!

I've made a break. Oh, really?

Does that explain a car, registered to your mom, on fire in front of...?

What's important is they're gonna rob another bank.

First Financial, and they hit two minutes ago... and they're still inside. So I am busy. Now, sit down and shut up.

Damn, man.

Car 1070. Suspects still in the bank.

How would you like me to proceed?

Backup units are on their way. Do not let them leave.

I don't think there's sexual tension between you.

I think that is genuine tension. Like "she gonna fire your ass" tension.

I can't stand this. They're gonna catch them... and we're gonna miss the whole thing.

Please. Ain't no cop gonna catch that woman.

Oh, yeah, and you can, right?

If I had my taxi.

Right away.

And keep me informed.

Let's take a walk.

Find Washburn. Now.

Eddie B! Washtub!

I need your help. I gotta get the...

Crown Vic. Crown Vic.

I need the signatures of two officers, man.

Two, perfect.

One, two. You know Lieutenant Williams, right?

Williams, from SWAT.

She's a jujitsu master.

Really?

She has her own dojo. Oh, wow.

You have any fliers? No.

Sure don't. Okay.

Oh, man. You gotta Friendster me.

I want a flier. Hey, man, got the...?

Here you go.

Thanks, man.

Hold it right...

Shots fired! Shots fired! Officer needs assistance!

Suspects headed north on Third Avenue...

Towards the Queensboro Bridge. What?

What you doing? We'll lose her. Go! Why take the East Side?

The Queensboro will be a parking lot.

Oh, you ain't slick. You heading west.

You're driving the speed limit, okay?

We won't catch... You think you slick?

You know 68th will be gridlocked. Hunter College's semesterjust started.

Unless you're gonna drive through the damn school.

Of course! She gonna take Fifth. Hell, yeah.

There's room to maneuver down Museum Mile.

And I know your crazy ass ain't scared to get up on that sidewalk.

That's what I would do.

Now, if I'm right... which I believe I am... she gonna come out right about here.

Come on, let's go! Get her!

I told you! Too much torque, grandma!

Watch this.

Whoo!

Pull over!

Police! Pull over the car! Pull over right now!

What?

My badge.

Now, pull over. This means something.

It's your last chance! Come on!

You trying to dent me? Not gonna happen.

Damn.


Shit!

Damn! I was on her ass too.

Let me just...


No BMWs have come through here.

A red BMW cannot disappear twice.

I got a blue Beemer on Morningside.

Good. I'll take it.

Ten-four. Units, stand by... unless you have an emergency.

License and registration.

I'm gonna need you to pop the trunk for me.

I gotta open it myself. It's busted.

Shit.

Pardon me, miss.

Thank you.

Could you open the case?

Sure.

Here.

You ladies have a nice day.

Miss Williams, give me your license. I'm taking it away from you.

What? You heard me.

You're not driving a taxi again. Let's go.

But I made her pursue that car.

Really. Hello.

Well, her taxicab is in violation of 27 vehicle codes.

Did you make her do that too?

Yeah.

Yeah, I did.

I ordered the modifications, top to bottom.

Top to bottom. Weeks ago.

So there.

What kind of car is it?

Ford. Ford.

What model?

Nervous. Excuse me?

Roundville.

You're an idiot. Give me the license.

Crown Victoria. I don't know what that means.

Come on.

But, see, it's the picture. It's actually a nice...

Marta... Lieutenant.

She was trying to help. Do something. No.

They stopped three BMWs.

Let's take her so she can hear the officers' testimony.

Let's go. Let's go.

Blue Beemer. This chick didn't even know how to open the trunk.

Chick? What chick?

The driver. Oh, she was a foxy little...

Four women. There was no money in the car. I searched it.

What are you two talking about? Of course. A red BMW?

Might as well drive an ice-cream truck.

They drove a BMW, that's what we look for, then they change it.

Wait a minute. You're saying that all four robbers are women?

Yeah. And you saw them?

Yeah. Last night.

Damn it! When were you gonna share this information, Washburn?

I tried to... I tried to tell you this mor... Shut up.

Officer Preston, come with me. Let's go.

You're fired. You're not suspended, not on temporary leave, fired.

Miss Williams, I'm giving this back to you with a warning.

If I catch you driving that thing in my city again, it is mine.

Andy, as a friend, I'm sorry.

I tried this morning. I went in to... You left me no choice.

Now, give me your badge.

What...?

Hey, wanna share a cab?

Yeah. Okay.

Turn over. What? What?

All I ever wanted to do was just be a cop, you know?

I wanna be like my dad, you know? My dad was a cop.

You know, I let him down.

I let you down. You're screwed, you can't drive this anymore.

She did not say that. She said not to let the cops catch me.

I can see why you like that lieutenant. She feisty.

You like us feisty girls, don't you? So you gonna give it another shot?

Give it another shot? She fired me.

So? Redeem yourself. Catch these thieves.

Try to start this for me, please.

Come on. Come on.

That's it. Life!

Wanna take it for a spin? No, no, no. No, thanks.

You need to practice. No, I drive fine.

I'm not in the mood for a lesson. Who said anything about a lesson?

It's just me in the passenger seat, and you driving.

It's not a driving lesson?

Okay. All right.

Buckle up your safety belts, kids.

All right. Here comes Washburn.

Just a...

Just a leisurely stroll through the evening.

And here we go. Engine started. My bad. Okay.

Lights here. Good. We have drive two...

Which is good, the sequel to drive. Chill out and drive, man.

Come on, now, you just gotta relax.

Just... Come on, let's relax. Just...

I said relax, not hyperventilate. Don't... What...? You...

Look how tight you gripping the steering wheel. Damn!

I'm trying to get in my mode, in the game.

Why don't you let the game come to you.

See, that's your problem.

You try too hard.

You over-think things. You be kicking down doors that's already open.

You always trying to impress somebody. Me, your dad, your ex.

Come on, if you ever gonna learn how to drive... we gotta play to your strengths.

And thinking ain't one of them. So don't think.

Don't think. Don't think. Don't think. No.

Just clear your mind.

Relax. Okay, relax.

Listen to some music.

Oh, hell, no. Hell, no. No, man. No. That was pretty good.

Hey, no, no! I like this one. Oh, yeah. Wait.

Natalie Cole, this one. Yeah, this one's my favorite. I love this one.

I listened to this as a little kid. Used to sing it in my bedroom.

All right. I mean, I was, you know...

Under supervision, everything like that. Whatever.

Sing along to it. I don't wanna sing. No.

Come on, sing. Sing the song!

Okay.

All right. There you go. There you go. All right, now, put it in drive.

Okay.

Who said stop singing? Sing!

Sing the damn song! There we go.

Shoulders down.

Relax. Yeah.

There you go.

You got it. You got it, man.

Hold on to the wheel. There you go.

Thank you so much. Oh, dude, you driving.

Wait. Please just stop bugging for two minutes...

And let me just explain... Are you okay? I've been worried sick.

Yeah. Come here, girl.

Baby, what are you doing here? You left your phone here.

He called, and I explained everything to him.

And, Belle, he's a dream. Come on in.

So you're not mad? How could I be mad?

You was mad at me. I wasn't that mad. Come here.

I missed you. I missed you too, baby.

Oh, my.

This is like watching pay-per-view. Mother!

Clear your throat.

Hi. Hi.

Come on, let's go home. You're not going. I made dinner.

No, you didn't. No, I didn't.

But I made margaritas.

And we can order.

Oh, boy, can we order.

Let's be logical. Let's go through the story one more time.

Okeydoke. BMW pulls out in front.

That's the amazing thing right there. Getting a parking space in Manhattan.

Jesse's totally right. Wait a sec.

How do you get parking in front of a bank, two days in a row, in Manhattan?

The only places I ever find are no-parking zones.

Loading zones, hospitals or streets that are no parking for...

Garbage day. Yeah, the whole side of the street...

Is a no-parking zone. Of course.

They rob the bank early in the morning. They put the cash in the garbage can.

We chase the Beemer, the garbage truck picks up the cash, they meet later.

Even if you catch them, they ain't got the money on them.

The only thing they need is a garbage man.

We gotta find that garbage man. Bye, Ma.

Hold on. Where you think you going?

Bye, baby.

Wait, wait! Hey, what do you want me to do with this?

We can't wait till the morning. The FBI may have caught them by then.

I mean... You know what I mean. Just keep a lookout.

Hurry up.

VoilĂ .

Wait, wait, wait. You don't think they have an alarm?

Come on, it's not Fort Knox. It's the Department of Sanitation.

Plan B, plan B.

Police. We heard the alarm. What's going on here? Everything cool?

You all right? Officer Mullins.

This is Officer... Goodsnatch.

Hello. What do we have here? Obvious B and E.

Perps might be still inside. Way to stay cool. Way to stay cool.

Look, they even left their lock picks. Surely they got prints on these.

Gotta... Gotta tag these. What's your name, sir?

Verne. "Ern"?

Verne! Bern, where's the...?

Verne!

Bern? Verne.

Verne. Where's the nearest computer?

Computers are inside. Follow me.

We find out who works 36th Street... from Third to Broadway on Wednesday...

Leonard and Church on Thursday, bang, we got our man.

Okay. "Personnel. Routes." Here we go.

Routes. All right, 36th, Wednesday.

There we go. We got our man. Anthony Scalia.

Same garbage man got both routes. You see that?

"3 East 117th Street. Apartment 4R." Yeah. Let's go.

I'm getting used to your driving.

Here's the plan. I'm gonna need you to boost me up...

To that fire escape, okay? Cable.

Mr. Scalia, it's the police. Open up.

Thanks.

Stay back.

Damn.

Hello?

One last pickup, then you are free.

You bring us the cash again, then, hey... we let you go. We let your wife go.

After I bring you the money, how do I know what will happen then?

You don't.

But if you go to the police... you do know what will happen, no?

So that's the best way over here.

We get in from here, and I think the best way out is coming from here... so we can make it faster.

Your car, sir. Okay, girls, time to go.

Don't transfer me. I need the garbage route ofAnthony Scalia.

It's an emergency. Now!

Look, it was on the fridge.

He works midtown today, then he's off for two weeks.

Oh, my God, it's gotta be today. Yep.

Get me Lieutenant Robbins. This is Washburn. Marta...

Whatever you're gonna say, I don't wanna get into this now.

I got FBI all over my ass. Lieutenant...

With all due respect... I can't hear you...

Shut up, Marta!

They're using garbage trucks to get the money out.

Both robberies were on the same garbage man's route.

There's gonna be another robbery this morning.

I know. I'm 100 percent sure. Please trust me, will you?

What bank? It's gonna happen... somewhere between 23rd and 34th, east of Fifth.

Down! Down! Shut up! Everybody down!

If I see anybody's eyes, I'll shoot!

You, on the ground! Now!

Pull over. Stop. Stop.

Pull over.

One squad car?

She didn't believe me.

So? So, what we gonna do?

Hold back! Hold!

Hey, grab somebody.

Drop your weapons and step out of the car!

On the ground now!

In this skirt?

I don't think so.

Come on, come on.

Now, I'm going to drive away. And if I see any cops, the kid dies.

Okay, girls, let's go. Wait. Wait, wait.

Can't let you take him. Look, take me.

Okay? Robbins.

Marta. It's okay.

Okay.

Come here. Get over here.

Spread them. Let's make sure you're not wearing a wire.

Turn around.

Damn.

Oh, Jesus. Would you take me too?

Okay. Get in the car. Come on, come on.

Any cops follow me, she dies.

Belle, we gotta do something.

All units, all units... be on the lookout for a blue BMW...

Headed north on Park Avenue. This is air unit 1070.

We lost them. Have no visual of the suspects.

Suspects last seen in the vicinity of 42nd and Vanderbilt... near Grand Central Station.

Washburn, you stay out of this, all right?

Whatever you got planned, don't do it. I don't got a plan.

All units, suspects still at large.

Last seen headed north on Third Avenue.

Calling my own backup.

Be on the lookout for a blue BMW. Suspects are armed and dangerous.

Mario. Belle, what's going on, girl?

Yo, listen, listen. I need your help.

Mr. Scalia, I'm a police officer.

Come on, who's got them? Who's got them?

We haven't seen anything yet.

I got them. 57th and Third, northbound.

Damn! They're probably at... 65th Street, heading north.

Damn.

We don't have anybody up there.

I'm on my way.

Hey, I got your money. Against the wall.

Oh, shoot, you got a gun. Who are you?

Ifthey get past 125th, we're gonna lose them.

You got punk'd. Sit down.

You okay, Mrs. Scalia? It's okay. Help me.

It's okay. It's okay.

There you go. Thank you.

Come on, get out of here.

Oh, my baby. Thank you.

That's a cool car. You can have it.

Have fun.

They can chase him for a little while.

Oh, cool.

Where's Marta? Who's Marta?

Where did they go? They never tell me anything. I swear.

Oh, shit.

Oh, my God. Look at all this money.

I'm gonna take a couple thou for the damage to my cab... because ain't nobody paying for that quick enough. Oh, my God.

Hello. All right, check it out.

They stopped at Marcus Garvey Avenue and 122nd.

They're switching into two silver Beemers, M3s.

Put her on the phone.

Excuse me, Ma. What?

You got a phone call.

Hello? Chasing you around...

Has been so much fun. And this tip... What are you talking about?

I'm talking about your money. We got your money, all of it.

Hey, you tell her. Tell her.

That cop chasing you, not a real cop... Shut up. Be quiet.

He is a real cop. He just got fired.

What do you want, cabby? I'll tell you what I want.

What do I want? Trade. Trade.

I wanna trade.

The money for the girl. I always wanted to say some shit like that.

Come on.

Deal. Yeah, all right.

We make the exchange on 125th Street and 12th Avenue.

Three minutes. No tricks.

Three minutes. Whatever.

Let's get the rest of the money in the bag.

Yo, yo, my phone!

You heard her, Mullins, three minutes. Haul ass and stay out of sight.

Don't worry. We'll have the roadblock set up. Don't wait for us.

Either backup is lying really low, or they not here.

What if she doesn't take the bait?

Change of plans. Thought we had a deal.

Never said I was stopping.

We'll make the exchange on the go, if you keep up in that heap.

Washburn. Turn the car around!

"Don't wait for me." He must've thought he sounded so cool saying that.

What are we doing? We need a plan.

I'm working on it.


No more chitchat!

Give me the cash, or I shoot the girl! All right! Just calm down!

I got a plan.

But we need to stall. What?

Start the transfer, but don't complete it.

Trust me.

All right.

Too early! Not yet!

Trust me.

These two big trucks coming up, is this part of your plan?

Get me in! Get me in! Come on!

Truck! Too early, get out!

Get out! Get out of here! What?

Get me in! Get me in!

We gotta stall. What are you talking about?

Trust me. Hey, got a car coming!

The exit's coming up. We need them to take it.

This way! Less traffic!

Give me the cash! No more games!

Girl first! No! Girl first!

No! We'll switch same time! On three!

One! One!

Two! Two!

Three!

Brake!


Yeah!

Die!

Oh, shoot.

Jesus, you're hit.

That skank shot me.

We gotta get you to a hospital. Come on.

Stay down. Stay low.

Watch out. Watch your head. Okay.

What are you doing? What are you doing?

I should drive. Come on. No, I got it. Hang in there.

He's got it. He don't.

He's got it. You got it, don't you? Yeah.

I'm letting the game come to me.

Why are you singing? Don't stop.

Why is he singing? He sings. Don't stop.

He sings?


Hello. Yeah, get me St. Mary's emergency room.

Washburn, there's the exit.

The rooms are prepped for surgery. Pull up to the ER... and park in the white zone, but not...

Okay, let's get this woman to surgery!

Come on! Move it!

And when you get her there, prep her! Quickly!

Get to stepping, people! There ain't nothing for you to see here!

Move it!

Welcome, NASCAR race fans.

We got a lot going on this weekend.

Several NASCAR racing divisions are represented here today.

Rookie driver Belle Williams, with her new sponsor... the Banks of New York, is taking to the track for the first time... to practice for her racing division.

The crew stands to make money. We all bet on you.

You know where your money's good. Check the stat on the tires.

Yo, you got visitors. Hey!

Oh, my gosh, you look great. That's so cool.

You look so cool. Hey.

You look great. Hi.

I love it. How are you, Belle?

What do you think? It's our latest undercover assignment.

Russian mafia.

I buy it, I buy it. How are your sponsors treating you?

Oh, good. Check it out. They have hooked me up.

This is unbelievable. It's great.

I remember saving this one. I remember saving this one.

Hey, Jesse. What's up, man?

Don't tell me. What do you got? Probably a 358 Cl, four-barrel carb...

720 horsepower...

8500 rpm.

I'm impressed. Oh, he's got it written on his hand.

Mom... Come on.

She's wasted. Come on.

Oh, Jesse, come on, let's have a cold one, okay?

I'll be with you in a minute. She needs a cold one.

You watch your ass out there. I will.

Because it's mine. I will.

Anyway... We gotta split. Party time. Yeah.

Good luck. Let's go. Bye.

What are you...? I thought...

Sorry, I thought there was a moment. Did you not...?

You keep giving signals. No signals.

There's no moment.

There'll be others. There'll be others.

Hey, take care of yourself, Five-O.

And don't do nothing crazy or stupid, all right?

Crazy and stupid's my style!

That yours?

Oh, my God. That's your boy. That's your boy.

You ready to do this? Yeah, yeah.

All the cars are heading out to the track.

Practice is now under way.

We have a special announcement on the JumboTron... for Banks of New York driver Belle Williams, from Jesse.

Oh, my God!

Yes! Yes! Of course I will!

And we see NASCAR's premiere series driver...

Jeff Gordon, returning to the drive...

Congratulations, Belle. Thanks, Jeff.

You ready? Ready to try and smoke you.

Let's do this thing. All right, let's do it.

What's up, bro? How you doing? Yeah.

Yeah?

Get in the car.

Sorry. I pinched her butt. Mark. Tail slate.

All right, here we go. Here comes Junior.

What? Where he...? Oh, Lord!

What the...?

Cut!

Yo, where in the car?

Door panel on the left. Just pull it. Oh, say it, don't spray it.

They're after computers? No, they're after your balls.

Yeah. They're after the computers.

Next time you guys in Havana, give me a call.

We'll play PlayStation. You know, play... You know, hang out.

Eat a gordita. It's a taco inside another taco.

Soft inside of a hard one. More beef and beans, beef... another taco and into another one.

You must be starving, little baby.

Door panel on the left.

You make me mad, dude.

Door panel on the left.

Yeah. Just pull it.

I'm telling you, you could... Baby.

Be there.

I don't know why I'm putting the phone here.

Your shoulder has something to say. I don't know.

Just pull it.

Just grab it... "Grab it" is better.

I can't believe this day. This is the worst day of my life.

I sound like Barry White's illegitimate white grandson.


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