Teen Titans Go! S1E6 Script

The Date (2013)

(Robin)

'Two, three, four, five.'

Yes.

[mumbling]

Two, three, four, five.

[continues mumbling]

Yes. Knew it.

[creaking]

Ooh, what you got?

Uh, nothing.

What you got?

Nothing.

What you got?

Nothing!

[buzzing]

[smacks]

[hissing]

What you got?

[crashing]

Yoink!

Come on, guys.

That's mine.

So what is it?

[both laughing]

It's one of those fortune-teller games

'that the little kids play.'

[chuckles]

Robin plays baby games.

Okay, yep. I'm a big baby.

Can I have it back now?

No way.

Not till we know our fortune.

You first, beasty.

Pick a color.

You know my color, bro.

G-R-E-E-E-E-N.

Oh!

What's my fortune?

What's my fortune?

Please be millionaire.

[instrumental music]

"You will..

... marry Starfire?"

Well, it doesn't mean I won't be a millionaire.

Now can I get it back?

Nope! My turn!

B-L-U-E.

And my fortune is

"You and Starfire will have seven kids." What?

That's gonna be awkward since I'm already marrying her.

(Cyborg)

'These are strangely Starfire-specific fortunes.'

It's because the fortunes are for me.

Oh!

Ooh!

Starfire does make you act a little nuts, doesn't she?

[male narrator]

There was something about Starfire that made him nuts.

Not the kind of nuts that put a knot in your stomach or made you wanna climb a mountaintop to shout out your feelings.

No, the nuts that made you hear voices in your head voices like mine.

There's this new restaurant opening tonight that she wants to try, but I don't know how to ask.

We can help you.

Really?

Me and Cyborg have asked out tons of girls.

And they went out with you?

No.

Of course not.

But we asked.

So, sit right there and learn from the masters.

[sobbing]

Please! Just go out with me.

[sobbing]

If you say no, I don't know if I could take it anymore.

Think this is the wrong approach?

Oh, please don't say no.

I already love you though.

Just be yourself.

'Just go out with me.'

[both sobbing]

[growling]

Hi, Starfire.

Hey, Starfire.

[chuckles]

Hey, Starfire.

[in Spanish accent]

Hola, Starfire.

No! Duh.

[knocking on door]

'Enter.'

[exhales]

Yes, Robin?

[instrumental music]

[squeaking]

[gulps]

Uh..

[stammering]

Is this a game?

Duh! What?

Tsk! Ooh!

[imitates Robin]

[both speaking gibberish]

[giggling]

Thank you, Robin.

Your game was most enjoyable.

Uh, yes. Good times, huh?

Wait. Star, there..

[clears throat]

'There was something else.'

'You know, that new restaurant that's opening tonight'

'uh, I thought maybe you'd like to go.'

[gasps]

I would love to.

You would?

Indeed.

But I cannot.

Speedy has already asked me to go with him.

Speedy?

How's it going, Robin?

Speedy.

Speedy had always been the chief rival of Robin.

First as a sidekick, then a hero and now for the affections of a strange but endearing alien princess.

At that moment, Robin knew he would do anything in his power to stop Speedy from winning over Starfire.

Even though reason said he should be more concerned with the voice he kept hearing in his head.

This guy?

Are you kidding?

How can you stand to look at that face?

I'm standing right here.

Ugh! Not to mention that voice.

I have always felt you two share many visual and auditory similarities.

Don't you get it, Star?

He's all wrong for you.

Is that not the purpose of the date?

To find out if one is compatible?

[grunts]

[video game music]

[clattering]

Whoa. What's wrong?

Speedy already asked her.

Oh, bummer, dude.

It's okay.

Are you sure you're okay?

You have that look again.

I have a plan.

Why is Speedy tied to a chair?

And in his underwear.

Speedy has a date with Starfire tonight and I'm going to keep it.

Something tells me he's about to blow any chance he has with Starfire forever.

Just keep an eye on him for me, okay?

Sorry, dude.

We would never do something like this.

Would you do it for a Scooby Snack?

Done and done!

Oh, yeah!

[classical music]

What am I doing?

Tying Speedy up, taking his place?

I can't go through with this.

Finally, Robin had come to his senses.

Though Starfire was his dream he could not compromise his conscience.

Hello, Speedy.

Yup. That's me.

I'm Speedy.

Have a seat!

Why, thank you, Speedy.

I find your being a gentleman compatible with several traits I possess.

Ow.

Ha! Never gets old.

Okay, very funny, guys.

Come on, let me go.

No.

Let me go.

No.

Let me go.

No.

Let me go!

Sorry, dude.

Not till after the date.

[sighs]

Okay.

Thank you.

Let me go.

No.

Let me go.

No.

Let me go!

No.

Let me go.

No.

[clock ticking]

Let me go.

No.

Let me go.

No.

Let me go!

Oh!

Kidnapping is so boring.

Wanna get something to eat?

What about him?

Let me go.

No.

Hey, Rave.

Will you watch Speedy for us?

Like a hawk.

You're the best.

[roof crashes]

Exit's the other way.

(Starfire)

'Is this really necessary, Speedy?'

(Speedy)

'Totally. This is what I do on all of my dates.'

[bell dings]

Oh, score!

I am beginning to wish I declined your invitation tonight in favor of Robin's.

Wait, but I thought you said Robin and I were basically the same.

I was factually incorrect.

You have nothing in common with Robin.

Goodbye, Speedy.

Yes!

[elevator bell dings]

No.

Robin, what are you doing here?

That's what I wanted to talk to you about.

It's time you learned the..

Excuse me.

[yelling]

[upbeat music]

[laughing]

[yelling]

I used to think your staff was lame but this is kinda fun.

[music continues]

[squeals]

I'll take these.

[gasps]

Are you okay, Robin?

Speedy has been acting quite strangely.

Yeah. I think he's a little, uh...you know?

He's not the one who's hearing voices.

Don't make me come in there!

I learned something important today, Robin.

Perhaps I have taken you for granted.

You are the kindest, most honest..

Robin had finally won Starfire over but at what cost, he wondered.

Yes, Robin was ashamed of the way he acted but deep down, there was still a good person.

He knew if he were to live with himself tomorrow he'd have to come clean today.

So he did.

He told her everything.

And hearing his actions out of his own mouth only made him feel worse.

His actions were just terrible.

Terrible!

You probably hate me, don't you?

Robin, you did all that for me?

I did.

Does that mean you're..

[crashes]

[echoing]

You are out of your gourd!

That's what I've been trying to tell him.

Huh?

I don't believe we've met.

I'm the voice in Robin's head.

And I am--

Absolutely stunning.

[giggling]

It is nice to meet you, disembodied voice.

What do you say you and me get out of here?

I would like that.

[elevator bell dings]

After you, my dear.

[giggles]

And what started as a chance encounter between a voice and a girl would soon blossom into the most wonderful--

Are you coming?

Uh, sorry. Be right there.

[theme music]