Teen Titans Go! S3E15 Script

BBBDAY! (2015)





Teen Titans, let's go

Teen Titans, go


Oh, yeah!

Oh, my name is B-Boy

Today's my B-day

I wanna eat some B-cake

Yummy, yummy B-cake


Ah, bro...

Today, you are the center of the universe.

Now, get out there and make your friends sing you a song, watch you blow out candles and open up presents!


What's happening, everybodies!

[CHUCKLES] Look at you. Yeah, you will, all day long.

Ooh, someone is feeling the good feelings.

That's right! 'Cause today is my special day.

What's so special about today?

[LAUGHING] Oh, you.

Like you don't know, come on.

Let's get this party started.

Mmm, there are no parties scheduled today.

Oh, I get it.

You're all doing "it's a surprise" style thing. I love it!

I'll just step out of the room for a moment.

Make it a decade.


Ah, getting roasted on my special day... Classic.

One, two, cake is in the room.

Three, four, five, candles lit.

Six, seven, eight, party hats on.

Nine, ten. [GASPING]

They're ready.

[GASPING] You guys, you didn't have to.

Oh, you need more time to set up?

Okay, I'll be back.


No way!


You shouldn't have... Will you stop that?

We are trying to quietly enjoy our activities.

Oh, man, you guys must have some big plans.

What's in there? [CLATTERING]

What are you doing?

I thought maybe you had something for me that's like, square with colorful wrapping and a bow.

You know what I'm saying? You're freaking me out, dude.


Criminals. [CHUCKLES]

Good cover, dude.

Does this crime involve cake and wrapping paper?

No, there's a herd of elephants on a murder spree.


While you take care of all those elephant-murderers, I will wait here, ready to be surprised.


Titans, go!






Oh, they forgot my birthday.


Oh, great party, bros.


Okay, time for you to watch me open my presents.

[IN FUNNY VOICE] Today is all about you.

Oh, how cool. Wow. [CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]

So thoughtful.

[IN DEEP VOICE] Open mine next.

Bro, what are you doing?

Just enjoying my birthday since my real friends forgot.



We did not do the forgetting.

Yeah, dude, we knew it was your birthday.

Then why didn't you treat me like I'm the center of the universe?

Because other people's birthdays are so boring.

Awkwardly singing that birthday song.

The eating of the cake with the spittle and the candle waxes upon it.


Watching gifts being opened and pretending to care.

"Ooh, open another box with some dumb trash in it."

It's the worst.

[SHAKILY] I'm sorry my birthday is such a bummer for you.

But it's nice to have one day a year when all the attention's on me.

I totally forgot it was your birthday.

You guys should've told me.


You're the only one who really cares about me, Ray-Ray.

Ow. I don't care about you.

There are cosmic consequences to forgetting someone's birthday.

What time is it? Almost midnight.

Taking down those murderous elephants took all day.

This is bad. We have to shower him with attention before the day is over.

Okay, he has cake, presents, we just need to sing to him.

Everybody, come on.

ALL: ♪ Happy... Do not sing that song!

But, it's the only way to... That song is off limits.

We can't afford it.

We have to pay to sing the birthday song?

Unfortunately, yes.

Why would they use such a beloved song for their own financial gain?

We're running out of time. Come on, sing.

But there is only one the birthday song.

Just make one up. Easier said than done.

The Happy Birthday song is perfect.

Simple, on point, great melody.





Oh, the lovely baby.

Oh, say "Starfire."

[COOING] Say "Aunty Starfire."


Lucky baby.

So, Beast Boy is a baby, because we didn't celebrate his birthday?

When we go to birthday parties and just stare at the person while they eat cake and open presents, we create time anchors allowing the individual to grow older naturally.

Without those anchors the universe has no idea how old you are, and you can see the results for yourself.

Did I ever tell you about the time I got a free onion?

There was green ones, red ones...

[GASPS] [GRUNTS] Ooh, my hip.

There must be something we can do to fix him.

What if we sing to him now?


[GROANS] Too expensive.

Even if we could afford the rights to sing that song, it wouldn't work.

The only way to save him is to celebrate his birthday at the center of the universe.


The journey is perilous.

We may not make it back.

Well, maybe he's not so bad this way.

The baby is adorable.

And the senior has wonderful stories.

You're forgetting, middle age.

[SIGHS] Life.


[SHUDDERS] Let's go.


Welcome to the center of the universe.

Where everyone wants to be on their birthday.

STARFIRE: So festive!

Don't let the bows and goody bags fool you.

This place is super boring.

If we don't complete all the birthday rituals before that sparkler burns down, we'll be stuck here.

And we'll have to clean up after the party.

We can't let that happen.

Then let's start with the most important part, the song.

Happy... Ow!

We do not have the budget for that song!

[SIGHS] Life.


We'll just, uh, make up a birthday song.

How hard is that?


Hey, you, great job being born

You stayed alive again this year

La, la, la you are the amazing

Birthday person


With too much frosting


Did it work? Yeah.

[GIBBERISH] For this next ritual we have to take a good picture of Beast Boy while he blows out his candles.

How is the baby supposed to blow out the candles?

He doesn't have the lung capacity.

He's too young to even know what's going on.

I agree, it's all pointless but we have no choice.

Ah, Beast Boy...


Look at the camera.

Look over here, Beast Boy.


Look... Look at the camera!

He won't look at me.

Guys, help me get his attention!

Beasty, woo-hoo...

Look at the little shiny thing.

It's working. Bigger faces, funnier noises.

[EXCLAIMING] Look at me.

Just look over here. Look at me.

I'm dancin'. I'm dancin'. I'm movin'.


Now, he needs to blow out his candles.


Can you make the blowing for Starfire?

Ooh, yes, you can...

Oh, yes, you can.



Ew! Who wants to eat a cake with spit and candle wax on it?

I don't!


He did it!

No, a trick candle.

Ah, I hate those things.

No one thinks they're funny.


Did I ever tell you how I got this watch?

[SNORING] He did it.

It was disgusting, but he did it.

This is the last birthday ritual.

We have to watch Beast Boy open a present and pretend to be interested.


Don't get cocky. It's harder than you think.

A present, for me?

So thoughtful.

I'll just gently peel back the tape so we can save this beautiful wrapping paper.


He is taking all for of the evers.

Open it already.

Remember, we have to pretend to enjoy this.

How can I, when the present isn't for me?

Can you at least smile awkwardly?

[MUFFLED] So boring.

Oh, so skillfully...

Wow, that's a smart looking t-shirt there.

We did it!

[BELL TOLLS] Aw, yeah... [GRUNTS]

We have to get back, come on.

Everyone, through the door, before the sparkler burns out.


Sorry, I forgot your birthday, Beast Boy.

And we are sorry we intentionally ignored it.

We had no idea it was so important to stare at you all day and pretend to care about you.

It's cool.

Now, let's eat this cake.

With the spit and wax all over it?

Yeah, boy...