Teen Titans Go! S3E26 Script

Beast Boy's St. Patrick's Day Luck and It's Bad (2016)

Go

[OPENING THEME PLAYING]

T-E-E-N

T-I-T-A-N-S

Teen Titans, let's go

Teen Titans, go

[IN IRISH ACCENT] What up, me lads and lassies?

Top of the mornin' to ya, yo.

If that's supposed to be an Irish accent, it's not even close.

[SOUTHERN ACCENT] Oh, how bout' this?

Oh, that is much, much worse.

[DEEP VOICE] This is better, right?

Boo, I say boo!

[PIRATE VOICE] Argh, this be an Irish accent for sure, right?

Hmm, now you just sound like a pirate.

[IMITATING PIRATES] Indeed he do. Yar!

Yar!

Yar!

Yar!

BOTH: Yar, yar, yar!

Yar!

Yar.

ALL: Yar!

Is there a reason you're talking in bad Irish accents, Beast Boy?

You're kidding, right? Today's your day!

St. Patrick's Day.

I am not Irish.

But, you are a leprechaun, right?

Indeed. I mean, that goes without saying...

Yeah, everybody knows you're a leprechaun.

Why would you all think I am a leprechaun?

'Cause you're short.

I am not short! You're pretty short.

Beast Boy is shorter than I am.

I do not believe this so.

Oh, yeah? Let's do it! Back to back!

Back to back!

See, I am taller.

I don't think so, dude.

No, he's doing that thing with his hand, where he has it tilted to make himself look taller.

And did someone check to see if he's on his tippy toes?

I only know what I see, a leprechaun in denial.

[YELLING] I am not a leprechaun!

Relax, bruh!

You're secret's safe with us.

And we have no desire to take the pot of gold.

[YELLING] There is no pot of gold to take!

Sure. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.

St. Patrick's Day is all about the three "L" s.

Leprechauns, luck, and my favorite, pinching!

If you're wearing green, you get to pinch people who aren't.

[EXCLAIMING]

You're not wearing green, you are green.

That doesn't count.

My skin is green, and I wear my skins, momma.

Now get ready, I get to pinch all of you.

Not Robin, he wears the green pants.

You can pinch me if you want, Starfire.

That would not be in accordance with the pinch rules.

[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]

How about now? No, thank you.

I'll take that pinch, fool.

Ow! Pinch, pinch, pinch, pinch.

[CHATTERING]

ALL: Ow!

[LAUGHING]

[ALL GROANING]

I need some bacitracin. Oh, so satisfying! Oh.

Oh, yeah? Let's see how you like it.

We about to take you down to pinch town.

Yo, yo, yo, you can't pinch me.

I am wearing green.

ALL: Pinch, pinch, pinch.

Listen, if you pinch someone wearing green, you'll be cursed with bad luck, forever!

ALL: Pinch, pinch.

No! [GRUNTING]

[GROANING]

You've cursed yourselves with a million years of bad luck, matties.

Oh, yo, ho, ho!

Whatever. [ELECTRICITY ZAPPING]

Uh-oh.

All I got these days is bad luck

All I got is bad luck

All I got these days is bad luck

Some of that old St. Patty's Day

Bad luck

Getting stung by a bee on your face is real bad

Getting stung by a whole beehive is bad luck

Stepping in a dirty puddle is way too bad

But getting gobbled by a gator is bad luck

All I got these days is bad luck

All I got is bad luck

All I got these days is bad luck

Some of that old St. Patty's Day

Bad luck

Cutting your finger is too, too bad

Cut your finger at a vampire party is bad luck

To get struck by lightning is real, real bad

But getting struck by lightning twice

Is bad luck

All I got these days is bad luck

All I got is bad luck

All I got these days is bad luck

Some of that old St. Patty's Day

Bad luck

[VIDEO GAME BEEPING]

We're cursed, bro!

Yeah, I knows.

So much of the bad luck.

I am getting the worst of it.

Really? I thought you'd be, like, immune.

Because I am a leprechaun?

Ha! He admitted it!

[ALL EXCLAIMING]

Now give me some frosted oat cereal with marshmallow surprises!

The leprechaun has admitted its leprechaundriety.

I don't know what Starfire said, but he's definitely a leprechaun.

[LAUGHING] Leprechaun is the house!

Just tell us how to get rid of the bad luck.

Why should I?

You pinched me!

I am sorry.

I was all red and swelled up.

We apologize.

I had to rub all kinds of ointments in everything.

Ew. And now, you ask me for help!

We'll do anything to lift this curse.

Anything, huh?

Okay.

Pinchy, pinchy, pinchy, pinchy, pinchy!

[CHATTERING AND LAUGHING]

Now, will you tell us how to get rid of this bad luck?

Sure thing, momma. It's super easy.

You just go to the end of a rainbow and find a leprechaun's pot of gold!

That's ridiculous. Rainbows don't have beginnings or ends.

[CLEARS THROAT]

A rainbow is simply a meteorological phenomenon, caused by refraction and dispersion of light in air-borne water droplets, resulting in a spectrum of light, appearing as a multicolored arch in the sky.

Are rainbows truly devoid of the magic, as Robin has said?

[SIGHS] He's just trying to keep us from the pot of gold.

Typical leprechaun.

Bro, you gotta give us the lowdown on that rainbow science.

BEAST BOY: What Robin doesn't want you to know, is that when two leprechauns fall in love, they kiss and their happiness forms a rainbow.

Then they hide their marriage gold at the end of it.

Simple, yo.

But, how are we going to get two leprechauns to make a love connection?

What?

Our leprechaun is the updateable.

Where are we going to get two new leprechauns?

Leave that to me.

This is a waste of time.

Rainbows are not made from leprechaun kisses.

Nice try, but you can't fool us, short stuff.

[YELLING] I am not a leprechaun!

You know, I don't even think we're cursed anymore.

[ELECTRICITY ZAPPING]

[GROANING] Still cursed. Carry on.

Perfecto.

[SNIFFS] Mmm, what smells like the giant butt?

A romantic leprechaun evening wouldn't be complete without cornbeef and cabbage, girl.

Now, we just need some tunes.

[SOOTHING MUSIC PLAYING]

All right, I am feeling this.

Let's get of the way now and let the romance happen.

Look, there's one now.

[SNIFFING]

It's working! The leprechaun is making his move, yo.

Oh, they made the kissing.

So romantic.

[MUSIC STOPS] Okay, let's get up on that rainbow, and follow those leprechauns to their pot of gold.

[STRAINING]

ALL: One, two, woo!

[CHEERING] RAVEN: Oh, yeah!

This is like the wonderful dream!

Yeah, wait.

Does our bad luck affect us up here?

Nothing can hurt you on a rainbow.

RAVEN: Ow! Ow!

[GRUNTING]

[GRUNTING]

[ALL GRUNTING]

[GROANING]

Come on, guys! We gots to find that pot of gold.

[GASPS] Look!

It is the leprechaun!

So magical.

It's just me. Oh, wrong leprechaun.

[ALL SIGHING]

Cheer up, I see the pot of gold!

Time to get paid!

Now, each of you needs to take a coin to reverse your luck.

[IN IRISH ACCENT] Don't ya be touchin' me pot o' gold!

[GASPS] It's the leprechaun!

So where's the wife?

Tis a sad, sad tale. She left me.

Ouch, that was fast.

Now all I got is this pot of gold, as a reminder as me failure as a husband.

There, there. You will surely love again.

Thank ya, lass.

Now, how did ya find me?

It was you, wasn't it?

Tis a sad say indeed, when one's own kin turns against him!

[YELLING] I am not a leprechaun!

Oh, I think I would know, boy-o.

You must have grown bitter at your own kind over the years.

Being teased as the tiniest leprechaun in the clover patch.

Tiniest? I am way taller than you!

[ALL SPEAKING TOGETHER]

Looks, we just need some of you gold to break the St. Patrick's Day curse.

Oh, somebody's been pinching when they shouldn't have, eh?

[ELECTRICITY ZAPPING]

So, can they have some of your gold or what?

You can have all the gold you want, if the traitor can defeat me in a duel!

Just name your weapon.

Fingers and thumbs.

A pinch fight it is.

Now, just because you're smaller than me, don't expect me to be going easy on ya!

I'd expect nothing less, brother.

[IRISH MUSIC PLAYING]

[SCREAMING]

ALL: We knew it!

The gold is mine.

Bring it, wee one.

Rainbow pinch!

Shamrock block!

Sha-leah-ray!

You want some more? No!

I yield! Me pot o' gold is yours!

[ALL CHEERING]

The curse is lifted!

Now let's get out of here and celebrate St. Patrick's Day right!

[IRISH ACCENT] You guys go ahead, I think I am going to stay.

But why?

The pot of gold, the rainbow.

For the first time in me life, I feel like I really belong.

We wish you the best of luck, Robin.

Sorry about your wife. Tis all right.

I am just happy to have someone here to share me gold with.

I hope friend Robin will be happy in his new life.

My man's doing just fine.

Uh, actually, his wife came back.

[CLOSING THEME PLAYING]