Teen Titans Go! S3E29 Script

Bottle Episode (2016)

Go

[OPENING THEME PLAYING]

T-E-E-N

T-I-T-A-N-S

Teen Titans, let's go

Teen Titans, go

[ELECTRONIC BEEPING]

What you got there, Beastie?

You means this fresh new shirt?

It has turtles on it, yo!

This one's the momsie turtle, this one's the daddy-o.

And this is the baby, Leroy.

Not your shirt, the big bottle.

Oh! You mean the big bottle?

Isn't it cool? I found it outside.

Well, I know what I'm doing today!

Let us enjoy this large glass container.

Oh, man! This is nice!

So luxurious!

Smooth on my face.

What? How? Why is there a giant bottle in the living room?

Because the living room is where Beast Boy put it.

This over-sized bottle is a safety hazard.

And I don't want to spend all day dealing with it.

What is wrong with that?

There's a whole world out there to explore.

In fact, right now we could be on an adventure in the Himalayas.

[VOCALIZING] That sounds expensive!

Yeah, let's just play with the big bottle.

It has to go. No way, bro.

If you want it gone, you gotta do it yourself.

[EXCLAIMING] Fine!

[IN MOCKING VOICE] Robin will handle it. Robin will handle everything.

[STRAINING]

Unbelievable!

Who drags a bottle into Titans Tower and leaves it in the middle of the living room?

[ECHOING] Hello!

Get out of there!

Nah-uh!

I'm living that bottle life, baby!

Ooh! I want to lives the bottle life, yo!

The life of the bottles is for me!

Bottle life, yeah, yeah Well...

If we all go in the bottle, perhaps we can move it from the inside.

ALL: ♪ Bottle life, yeah, yeah RAVEN: ♪ Bottle life

[SQUEAKING]

What was that noise?

I put the cap on, yo!

What? I put the cap on, yo!

How did you put the cap on from the inside?

Great.

Just as I predicted.

We're stuck in a bottle for the duration of today's activities.

Well, on the bright side, think of all the money we're saving.

[SQUEAKING]

Oh, yeah? Then I challenge you.

Make this experience interesting.

I know how to make this fun! Let's just sing some songs.

A song? Yes.

That's interesting and possibly humorous.

Okay, everyone. And a one, and a two.

[VOCALIZING]

Arrr! Oh The waves of yonder seas

A salty tale of a pirate Oh, come on, man! Not sea shanties.

We don't want to hear that.

These do not compare to the songs we have previously performed.

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

What are you suggesting?

We are already stuck in a bottle.

Which is boring!

And instead of coming up with a new song, you just want to flashback to old songs we already know?

Yeah, what's wrong with that?

Boring!

Nots to me, fool.

Let's take a moment and remember our favorite songs.

[CHIMING DISTORTEDLY]

Waffles, waffles, wa-ffles

Waffles, waffles, wa-ffles

Waffles, waffles, wa-ffles

Wa-ffles

Buns, ketchup, pickle, cheese

Put that patty in between

It's burger! What? What?

It's burger! What? What?

Buns, ketchup, pickle, cheese

Put that patty in between

It's burger! What? What? It's burger! Whoo!

I'm a boy A really real boy

I'm a boy A really cool boy

I'm a boy A really real boy

I'm a boy A real cool boy

You can catch an awesome tan

Real boy

Play in a big belly band Real boy

[RHYTHMIC DRUMMING]

Oh! She called you uncle 'Cause your jokes are lame

And you're far from funny It's a cryin' shame

When you hear them crickets You're the one to blame

[CRICKET CHIRPS] ♪ Ha, ha, ha, ha

It is not the cool If you ask me

You're acting like a glibnort

Do you see?

It's the U to the N the C-L-E

Uncle Jokes are bad for you and me

It's time to get cool Like right, right now

Y'all Titans really want to know how?

Well, it takes attitude and confidence

Mix 'em up together like that

Hey, Titans ♪ ♪ What?

Titans ♪ ♪ What?

How do y'all like my butt? ♪ ♪ Say what?

It's C to the double-O, L

You can't fade away

The way I feel for you

There ain't no word that can say

What I'd do for you

And every single day

I make it through this game called life

It's always filled with pain and strife

Reality will cut you like a knife

It ain't right

But with you by my side We will win this fight

In the battle of dark and light

Oh, take my hand Hold it tight

When we dance I feel all right I can't believe you just flashed back to old memories.

They weren't our full memories, just clips.

That is so lazy!

I wanted to sing a new song, have a new adventure.

Oh, look at Mr. Money Bags over here!

Those things are expensive.

But we've been doing great!

We can afford a little change of scenery.

You would think.

Would you like to pay for the luxurious trip with your golden pirate treasure?

Never mind. Now, come on!

Help me bust out of this thing.

No, I'm good in the bottle. Let's sleep in here.

[SIGHS]

I'm just concerned that you guys will become boring.

We're always doing exciting stuff.

Yeah! Likes that one time...

This is what I'm talking about!

Do not flashback!

Sorry, bro! It's too late!

We're remembering the times we did exciting things!

[CYBORG VOCALIZING]

[MUSIC PLAYING]

[EXCLAIMING]

[SWORD SLICING] [RAVEN SCREAMS]

[EXCLAIMING]

[LASERS FIRING]

[ELECTRONIC WHIRRING]

[ROARS]

[EXPLODES]

[TIGER ROARING]

[LASERS FIRING]

[WHOOPING] [CHEERING]

STARFIRE: So much of the excitement!

[STRAINING]

It's so great that you're all reminiscing. [GRUNTS]

But we need to get out of this bottle, [GRUNTS] before we become the most boring heroes of all time!

Dude, we're not going to do this every day.

This is just so we can catch up.

You know how aggressive our schedule is.

Consider this a bit of a breather.

Oh! You like breathing, do you?

Well, if we don't escape from this glass prison, we will die from lack of oxygen.

Such is the nature of the bottle life.

Fine. Enjoy your boring bottle.

I'm getting out of here.

It's not too late to have a real adventure.

[SHATTERING] [SCREAMING]

Ow! My leg!

That is the extreme injury.

Oh! Ow, ow, ow!

You have to admit, there's nothing boring about a compound fracture.

[SCOFFS] We have been beat up way worse.

Oh, yeah! Like that one time...

No, please!

No, not another series of clip length memories.

Will you hush?

We're trying to remember all the times we hurt ourselves.

[ALL EXCLAIMING]

Star? [GRUNTS]

[EXCLAIMING]

[EXCLAIMING]

[EXCLAIMING]

[SHATTERING]

Didn't that last clip just happen?

It's hard to believe that after all those injuries, we're fine.

Uh, I'm not.

Oh, yeah! We got the deformities.

Our bodies are ruined.

But it was worth it.

For the laughs.

[GRUNTING] Guys...

It's not too late to do something interesting. [GRUNTS]

I ask you now, ouch, as your leader.

Haven't I always pushed you to be your best?

Demanded from you nothing but excellence?

I don't know. Uh, I can't recall.

I seem to have forgotten.

You don't remember?

Nah, maybe you can remind us.

In a series of flashbacks, perhaps?

Don't make me do this.

It's the only way, dude.

[SIGHS]

I would never abandon those who would stand with me against the ever surging tides of evil!

So inspirational!

My heart just laced up its dancing shoes, baby.

Okay, Titans!

I have spent weeks designing an obstacle course to push us right to our limits!

You can do this.

Just because you're scared doesn't mean you're not strong.

[SCREAMING]

NARRATOR: After defeating the British with his sweet kung fu moves, Robin became the first President of the United States.

Man!

He really does push us to be the best.

Super inspirational, yo!

Perhaps Robin is right.

Being stuck in the bottle is boring.

Then we need to help him get us out.

Ready? For what?

For today's adventure, bro!

I hear the Himalayas are beautiful this time of year.

Let's do it.

[ROBIN EXCLAIMING]

[COUGHING]

We did it. Ouch.

We are no longer trapped in one location.

We are no longer forced to rely on old memories as a form of entertainment.

Who's ready for new exciting adventures?

[ALL CHEERING]

[WHOOPING]

Yay!

[CLOSING THEME PLAYING]