The January Man (1989) Script

Hey, cowboys!

Want some sugar?

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year!

Should auld acquaintance be forgot...

No. I would never forget you.

I'll never forget you.


After you, my dear Alphonse.

Thank you.

Oh, dear!

Call me if you get blue.

I am blue.

Call me.

The phone will be ringing by the time you get home.

Here I go.

Wait till she gets in, please.



Happy New Year.

Happy New Year, honey.


Gracie Mansion, please.


They've multiplied.

Lord Jeffrey Amherst was a soldier Royal and true And he summoned all the Indians Into his sight Oh, Amherst, dear Oh, hello.


Line up!

Hello, Pepino.

Hello, little Lord Byron.

Come here and lay one on me.

Four, three, two, one!

Happy New Year!

Frank, wait a minute. Forget it.

Just forget it.

That's easy to say.

You don't understand.

See, I don't care anymore.

I don't care what makes sense anymore.

I don't give a rusty fuck... if they boot me down the City Hall steps... and send me back to the Bronx!

We gotta get this guy!

Everything that can be done is being done.

My daughter was with her last night.

It was my daughter, my child.

It could have been her. This is not politics anymore.

Everything's politics!

The hell it is! I can't even sleep.


When you point your finger at some guy... and you say this is the guy that could do the job... ain't the flashbulbs going?

Don't you read it in the papers the next day?

Get me your brother... and get him now... and get him before you go to the ballet, Frank.

Get those hoses up here!

Come on. Move your ass!

Move it!

Get it on, Tony!

OK, Tony, turn it up!

In the windows!

Put it in the windows!

Turn it on!

Get that pressure up!

Turn it on, damn it!

Chief? Yeah?

I'm looking for one of your men.

Who are you?

Franklin Starkey.

I'm Chief Sunday. Who you want?

Nick Starkey. He's in there.

Well, get him out here.

I have to talk to him.

It remains to be seen whether or not he is coming out!

What the hell are those guys doing?

Tell them to get the hoses up!

That window! Over there!

Get jumping now!

Come on! Move it! Move it, damn it!

Stay with it.

Hey! Advance that line!

Hi, there.

I'll take it from here, Nick.

I wonder if I could get a cup of coffee.

Preferably espresso.

I'm not happy to see you, Frank.

You should be.

I've come to take you away from all this... and make you a big shot.

I never wanted to be a big shot, Frank.

That's your thing.

You must be up shit's creek to be here talking to me.

The mayor knows you're good at this kind of thing.

You must be out of your mind with amnesia... to be here talking to me.

Now calm down, Nick.

I'm a fireman!

We're going to reinstate you.

I'm a fireman now!

We're going to take all the heat we have to from the press.

I run into these fucking buildings when they're on fire!

You're gonna get a commendation for what you did tonight.

Please, don't bother on my account.

That was very heroic.

Go, Frank.

There's a lot between us.

None of it is good.


It's my career.

All right.

I'll come back.

Frank... on one condition.

What do you think of Maria?

Who's Maria? The ballerina.

She doesn't trust her partner enough.

Should she?

I don't think she has any other choice.

Where's Frank?

I don't know. He's late.

In that case, let me see you through intermission.

Mrs. Starkey, where's the commissioner tonight?

Here he is. Excuse me.

Duty calls, and Christine goes.

I was beginning to think you wouldn't make it.

I had to go...

I had to talk to Nick.

He's going to be reinstated in the department...

He's going to be the new special investigator.

How is he... Did he agree?

You look flushed.

The dance was very stirring.

Usually you're bored.

Did he agree?

I can't believe it.

Why not? After all, he is my brother.

That never stood in your way.

Are you siding with him?

Franklin, you should know better than that.

What did you have to promise him?

Hi, Ramon.

I'm thinking. I am thinking.

All right.

Hi, Ed.

Will you get that animal, please, and put it at her feet.

Don't smile, Olympia.

"Beware the jabberwock, my son!

"The jaws that bite, the claws that clutch!"

Watch your hands, buddy!

Like that? Stay. Very good.

Shut up!

Ed, why didn't you use your apartment?

You've got the light.

Look, I'm making dinner tonight. Can I borrow my table?


Just languish there, darling.

Don't molest anything.

Ed... you want a job?

What's a job? Work... for money.

Money? Yeah. Do you remember money?

Yeah, I remember it.

What do you think?

It is irritating to me that I need money.

I shouldn't need it. I don't agree.

It's good every once in a while... to get roped into somebody else's, you know...



For money?


I'm going to have a press conference... tomorrow morning at 10:00.

The governor, he's letting me have his best speechwriter.

He's gonna write the statement.

The fucking guy is a poet.

I'll have the hard-liners... wringing their handkerchiefs out before I'm through.

The prodigal son with the right stuff... forgive and forget.

"For everything there is a season."

How do we face the terrifying spectacle of Nick Starkey... what he may do, what he may not do.

Anyway, I wanna get going.

I want to start working on it tonight.

I want to get all the borough presidents.

I want them standing up there with me shoulder-to-shoulder... and if I can get that prick with the scarlet cape... the cardinal, to stand up, I'm gonna get him up there, too.

And, you, you're going to be to my right.

Now, what I want to do...

I want it to look like the city is united... in bringing Nick Starkey back.

I don't want it to look like his brother's... bringing him clean underwear or something like that.

I'll take care of all the questions.

No matter how rough they get, I'll be as pious as hell.

And when it's over... take a break, let them have a shot at you.

And then give them some hard talk back... two or three minutes, but be conservative.

Very, very conservative.

And if you blow, blow with dignity.

I'm going to be dog meat after this.

No, you're not.

If he comes out of this looking great...

I'm an asshole for firing him.

If he blows it, I'm a schmuck for bringing him back.

If he blows it, we're all unemployed.

And if he gets the guy, we're all heroes.

That's the news.

It's like Elizabeth Taylor says...

"There is no deodorant like success."

What is it?

Captain Alcoa is here.


He heard.

OK. Send him in.

I won't do it!

Do what?

Hey, don't bullshit me besides screwing me.

We're all having a bad day, Alcoa.

Nobody needs your volume.

Nick Starkey is no policeman!

Well, his record shows otherwise.

He don't belong in the department.

That's for me to say!

He's like a... he's a fucking beatnik!

He's got a beatnik mentality.

Maybe that's what we need, is a beatnik.

Sure, seems funny down here and now... but it don't feel so fucking funny... in the middle of a murder case... when you've seen those girls dead!

Who do you think you're talking to?

Jesus Christ!

Who the fuck do you think you're talking to?

You think I'm your wife?

You wanna fuck me? Don't mess with me.

You mess with me, and you better have a goddamn sense of humor... the size of Lake Michigan to find something to laugh about.

If I send you a rubber duck to work with... that is the news!

Can you understand that?

Do you understand?

So then, it's true.

It's true.

When? Tomorrow.

So you get out of here, and you be a good boy.

And if Nick reports to you, you treat him like a god.

Do you understand that? Can you understand that?

And if he wants anything, you give it to him.

If he wants your wallet, you give it to him.

And you keep me posted.

No. Never mind trying to say anything.

Just shut up and get out.

Go on! I'm trying to have a meeting here!

So... did Nick agree without a fuss?


Well... what do you have to do?

I let him cook dinner for my wife tonight.

Come in. Door's open.

It's been open for two years.



What, is it snowing?

A little.

Well, take off your clothes... coat!

Make yourself comfortable.

I got to change.

How you doing, Sam?

How are you? Good.


What is it?

Why did you make me come here?

I wanted to make you dinner.

You always make me things that I hate.

I try to.



The wine.

It's breathing.

I decanted it an hour and a half ago.

How much did it cost?


I won't like it.

I never like any wine that costs less than $20.

No matter how good it tastes?

That's right.

I'll pour you a glass.

What do you think? I hate it.


This is balsamic vinegar.

Sprinkle some on the octopus.

It's great.

Where did you get that scar?

A burn from a fire.

Right. You're a fireman.

Till yesterday.

It's hard to picture.

A burning building... everybody else runs out, you run in.

Basically, it's a maniac's job.

Marinated eggplant?

No, thanks.

Have you forgiven Franklin?

For what? Did he do something wrong?

He betrayed you.

Did he?

He needed a fall guy, and he gave them you.

Did he?


His own brother. That's right.

How should I feel about that?

I guess you should be mad.

Then that's what I am.

I'm mad.

Anything else that I should be mad about?

Yes. What?

Me. Right.

I should be mad about you...

and that is my fucking curse.

I am... still mad about you.

I should go.

Yeah. You should.

You hate the food, and you married the wrong man.

I'll get my coat.

You might as well, Christine...

'cause I am not gonna sleep with you... not while you're married.

I'm not gonna sleep with you.

That's right, you're not.

Not if you beg me on your knees.

I may covet my brother's wife, but I am not gonna boff her.

You have not changed.

Neither have you, but you should.


Haven't you missed me?

Please, don't.

When you close your eyes, don't you see my face?

Nick, don't.

How do you make love to him after me?

How do you get wet? Do you think about the money?

There was a check.


That last night I saw you, two years ago. Here.

There was a canceled check on the table.

I don't know what you're talking about.

There was a canceled check on that table right there... made out to my brother Frank.

After you left, it was gone.

Are you accusing me?

I'm telling you.

You're wrong.


Thanks for stopping by.

All right. You've got about one more minute.

I can take one question. One more, that's it.

Mr. Mayor, do you really think Nick Starkey... can expect the support and respect... of the police department... given his ungraceful departure of two years ago?

Now understand this.

There was no hard evidence of graft, all right?

What's going to happen to him?

Just a second. Let me finish... or you can come up here and do it.

Now, because he was under a cloud... we were under a cloud.

So we made what you might call a political decision.

And he was wonderful.

He put the department's good ahead of his good.

He could have fought it, but he knew what he'd destroy.

And I respect him for that.

And at this moment, I think he's the obvious choice... in this dangerous juncture of time to lead the investigation.

Because we have to do something... and I think that Lieutenant Starkey... can make it happen.

That's all for today.

The show is over. I gotta go.


Commissioner Starkey, how do you feel... about your brother being named special investigator?

I'm very glad my brother's been reinstated.

Obviously, I was grieved... by his difficulties of two years ago... and hoped the day might come when he could resume his career.

That day has come.

No one is happier than me.

Yeah, you look ecstatic.

That was police...


Come in here.

Yes, sir?

When Lieutenant Starkey reports, keep him away from me.

Give him Olson's old office.

Lieutenant Starkey's already reported, sir.

He has?

Yes, sir... and he didn't like Olson's old office... so he took the big one down at the end of the hall.

He doesn't like Olson's office?

He said the light was no good.

What light?

You know, sir. The sunlight.


What's he need sunlight for?

For Ed.

For Ed?

Yes, sir.

Who's Ed?

The painter.

That office doesn't need to be painted.

He's not that kind of painter, Captain.

He's... you know, he paints paintings.

He's an artist.

What's going on here?


You told him?


You told him about the painter?


I got a sweet tooth for this shit.

I love it.


Hi, Butch.

Captain Alcoa.

You want some espresso?

Do I hear crickets?

Yeah. It's a tape. Isn't it great?

Who's that?

That's Ed.

The painter?

That's right.

You want sugar?

Why's the furniture in the hall?

I didn't want it. I wanted space.

Did you miss me?

I don't have anyplace to put that furniture... if it's not in here.

I don't want it.

But I'll tell you what I do want... all reports, photos, news accounts... background of any kind on every one of the murders.

In order of priority... everything on that last murder first.

Second priority... everything on the very first murder.

You must have a shitload of stuff by now.

We do.

It's like a library.

It's in 202.

Then leave it in 202. I'll go to it.


And put Ed on the payroll.

As what?

My assistant.

No. I'll assign you an assistant.

I need Ed.



I need an NEC computer...

Lotus Agenda.

We have about five Bedbecks.

Bedbeck's no good. I need the NEC.

I need the NEC.

You're not drinking your espresso, mon capitaine.

Oh, well. I've got to go.

Where you going?

I'll be back about 3:00.

Where would I be going?

It's a beautiful day.

I put on my best dress and go to a funeral.

Hang in there, Ed.

Up yours, copper.

But we must meet calamity with introspection.

Allison Hawkins was a member of the Hawkins family.

She is gone, but the Hawkins family remains.

The family remains... and something of Allison remains in them... in each of them... and in all of them.

You are in shock now, and you are in pain.

When this coffin is shouldered and carried from this church... grieve your grief... let it go.

Trust in God.

Grieve, repair... live.

Open your hymnals, please.

I'm sorry. Are you OK? I'm fine.


Do I know you?


You're Nick Starkey.

I know your brother.

Good for you.

Were you following me?


You were the prettiest one at the funeral.

Can I buy you some hot chocolate?


So... do you usually go from funerals to ice skating?


It makes sense to me.

It does?


What's funny?

My father thinks you're a genius.

I am.

You know... let's forget this.

You don't want to question me?


What's the matter?


In a hundred years, we'll all be dead.



My friend Allison and I spent New Year's Eve together.

I keep going over our conversation in my head.

We didn't really say anything to one another.

It was like most conversations, I guess... except it happened to be her last.

And then today... that funeral...

I just kept thinking... how much of life is wasted.

I mean, we're sitting here, we're talking to each other.

I mean, shouldn't we be really talking to each other?

All right.

I saw my brother's wife Christine last night... and she and I were an item at one time... and so it was a very painful evening.

And now today, I see you... and I find you very... attractive.

And I'm feeling vulnerable because of last night... and so my feeling is... my instinct as a man is...

I don't want to ask you a lot of pushy questions... because I want you to like me.

In fact, how real do you want this conversation to get?

Because saying these things out loud... has made me want to go to the next step... and say to you... this restaurant's a five-minute walk... from seven hotels.

It is?

It is... and I'd like to... get a room in one of them... right now and take you there.

You would?

Yeah, I would.

What do you say?

In a hundred years, we'll all be dead.

What do you say?

Just exactly how old are you?



Is something missing?

Nothing's missing. This is what happens.

What are you talking about?

I knew when I came back down into this world...

I'd start having weird behavior like this.

Like what?

23 years old.

So what?

And look... you're on top.

I've got to get out of here.

So go.

What if I had a heart attack, and they found me with you?

I'm speechless.

So... where we going now?

Where are we going?

How do you figure that?


I haven't felt safe.

I feel safe right now.

Let me have a little more of that.

All right.

Show me where Allison Hawkins lived.

Which window was hers?

You see that right there, next to the lights?

Come on. I wanna take a look.


Oh, Lord Jeffrey Amherst Was a soldier Royal and true And he summoned all the Indians Into his sight...

Come here and lay one on me.

Everybody knows where I live.

I kept having these nightmares last night.

I know my house is safe, supposedly... but it's giving me the creeps.

Everybody knows where I live.

I'm gonna have to get back to the precinct.

I got to work tonight.

I understand.

You can stay at my apartment if you want.

You'd be by yourself.

Could I? Sure.

That would be great.

I'll... call my father and make an excuse.



Ed, why are you still here?

I'm just trying to get the hang of this.

Go home.

This is... Bernadette.

Bernadette, this is Ed. He lives in my building.

She's gonna stay in my place tonight... so would you show her in?


Hi, Ed.



You're welcome.

So long.

So, go.

Ed, I'll see you in the morning.


Where you going?

For a walk.



To get away from you.

What have you figured out about the case?

This guy, whoever he is, he's fabulous with locks.

In seven of these cases, the guy picked the lock.

Some of these locks were supposed to be unpickable.

What else?

He's not just smart with locks.

He's just smart, very bright in a useless kind of way... and cracked as an old teacup.

You don't get away pulling eleven separate murders... unless you've got a brain like a Swiss watch.

You don't murder eleven women... unless you're plain fucking crazy.

Or you haven't figured out the motive.

I haven't figured out the motive.

That's a separate problem.

I mean, I know the motive.

What is it?

This man has a lot of anger towards women.

That's fucking brilliant.

It must have been his mother.

Blue ribbon's an interesting touch.

I mean, blue ribbon... it's an award.

Maybe the mother... rewarded the kid with something that strangled him.

Maybe the constant rewarding by the mother... was the thing that caused the feeling of being strangled.

I bet this guy overachieves like gangbusters.

I'm walking here! What are you? Crazy?

"Prime cut."


What are you talking about?

I'm about to know when he's going to kill the next girl.


I'll call you in an hour when I got it figured.

Listen, Frank.

You and me, we got something in common with the murderer.

We do? Maybe you do.

Just like him, we've got a mother.

Don't go comparing our mother to his.

Just like his mother, our mother had an affect on us.

Don't you say a goddamn word about our mother!

You see? She's dead, and we're still fighting over her.

She had a big effect.

Get back to talking about the case.

It's like with your wife.

Don't bring my wife into this!

I'm warning you.

You're right. It's really about our mother.

Frank, I got one thing to say to you... and it's hard, but I gotta say it.

And if you can accept it... a lot of other shit's gonna fall into place.

Frank, Mom loved me more than you.

That's why I took the fall for you, Frank.

I wish you'd just fucking die.




Bernadette, isn't it?


Mrs. Starkey.

I think we met at the mayor's birthday party... and at the opera, also, I think.

And now here.

And now here.

Would you like to come in? No.

He's not here.




No, I think I'll just be going before there's a traffic jam.

Oh, my God.

Hiya, Cone.

You know what a prime number is?

Any number...

What is it?

Any number that can only be divided by one and itself.

Whatever you say.

There are twelve prime numbers possible out of 31 days.

These are the dates of the murders.

Eleven prime numbers.

What's the twelfth?


What's today?

January 4th.

Then it's tomorrow night.

He's going to kill the next girl tomorrow night.


I don't know.

I better leave you to figure.

You're the real thing.

You're a real shamus.

Alcoa, I know when the guy's gonna hit again.

You gotta give me your cooperation here.

Fuck you!

And don't even look at me.

I don't work for you.

You work for me.

You think you can come in my office... stand in my face and tell me the news... like I'm some monkey-do lieutenant?

Fuck you!

You are not a policeman!

I am a fucking policeman!

Get it, you dilettante fuck?

No matter what the mayor says!

I'm going to need a backup unit tomorrow night on call.

Maybe all night.

If I ever get my hands on a shred of paper... that proves that you were on the take back when...

I will delight in getting the charcoal for the barbecue.

I'm gonna need the team in the van... with the motor running.

Tomorrow's the night.

That's when he's gonna hit, maybe for the last time.


I don't know yet.

Yes, Captain Alcoa.

Get me Emergency Service unit.

So, Christine, I understand you had dinner with Nick.


I want to know what happened.

Did he say he was going to do anything further... or talk to anybody further about the... scandal that happened about two years back?

I mean, not that there's anything to talk about.

He thinks there's a check.

A check?

A canceled check made out to you, Frank.

From who?

Well, it would be a crooked road, Eamon... but I think it would be traced back to you.

Does Nick have this check?

No. I don't even think he's looking for it.

You don't?

No, I don't think so.

I think he's much more interested right now... in fucking your daughter.

What are you talking about?

You don't understand what I'm saying?

I'm sorry. Picture it. Just...

Look at your cigar and think of your daughter.

Don't bother to get up.

It's all right. Roger will see me home.

What are you doing?

I'm checking into a hotel, Frank... and out of the whorehouse.

Lovely meal. Thank you.

Thanks. Good night.

All done.

It's here.

What's here?

Tomorrow night is here.













These are the rooms where each murder was committed.


Have you got my paper?

No paper for 12-C, sir.

Let me take a look and see if my paper's there.

Holy Jesus!

Can you do a whole part of town this way?


You want to see the big picture?

Oh, God.

Nick, can this voodoo and meet me out front.

There's been another murder, but we got the son of a bitch.


Hello, Captain.

Hello, sir.

The woman's upstairs, named Lana Pico.

Strangled in her own apartment.

He strangled her, walked to the dining room... jumped right through the fucking window.

Look at that.

The son of a bitch has the ribbon right in his hand.

It's gonna make a great picture for the Post.

How'd he get in?

Broke in through a window opposite the air shaft.

Broke in?

Yeah. The window was gated.

He kicked it in and waited for her in the bedroom.

Wait. Nobody gets through.

Can we just get down there?

Hello, Alcoa.

Hello, sir.

And you are? Detective Reilly, sir.

Good to meet you, Reilly.

Killed himself?

Yes, sir.

Hi, Nick. Not him.

Pretty ironic, huh?


He killed himself.

We didn't need Sherlock Holmes after all.

Can we see you over here, Commissioner?

That's my father's car.

All right. Go ahead.

Hi, Dad.

What the hell are you doing here?

And what are you doing... Never mind. I heard.

I heard. We'll talk about it later.

You just get out of here before they take your picture.

What's the matter with you?

Would you do what I say! You get out of here.

Don't become a liability, little girl.

Apparently he just jumped, sir.

Oh, my God.

There he is.

The whole city is frightened to death for a year... because of just one guy.

Thank God that's over.


What do you mean, "maybe"?

I don't think this is the man.

What? He strangled the woman.

He's got the ribbon in his hand.

What the hell are you talking about?

Why'd he kill himself?

How the fuck do I know?

He murders eleven women.

No problem.

He murders one more, he feels so bad... he jumps out the window?

I don't buy it.

Why'd he break in the window gate?

He never broke anything before. He just picked the lock.

Then there's the date... not a prime number.

It doesn't figure.

Let me tell you something. Life is like that sometimes.

You were wrong, that's all.

I'd like to take a look at the apartment.

You want to see the apartment, Commissioner?

I'll be up in a minute.

Eamon, could you take a look at this?

What is it?

A statement for the press.

You gonna make it?

Yes. All right.

Mayor, what's the story?

Did they get the strangler? Get back.

It's all over.

The commissioner will have a statement for you.

Can we leave? Sure.

Excuse me.

The commissioner has a statement for you.

Mr. Commissioner! Rumor has it that this is the strangler!

Why was the mayor here tonight?

Tonight comes to an end twelve months of fear.

See you, Nick.


All right, I'm a fireman!


What are you doing here?

Ed let me in.

He was wrong to do that.

Nick, what's wrong?

I'm very tired!

Why don't you come here and sit down.

They want you, they need you. The rest of the time...

Can I help you?

You! You're the mayor's daughter!

I could do a number on him, but I wouldn't bother.

What are you talking about?

Don't you get it?

This wasn't it. That wasn't him.

Then who was that?

Some guy. Some other crazy!

And tomorrow night, while your father and my brother... and all the other slobs who only care about the way it looks... and don't give a shit about how it actually is... while they're all slapping themselves on the back... the January Man... is going to get his January Girl.

So stop him.

I've been fired. So solve it anyway.

Nick, I woke up here today.

I saw how you live. I see what you like around you.

I understand you want to run away from these people.

I understand.

It's their responsibility. No.

They don't know what that means.

I'm tired.

I know.

I know you are.

So we're going to go to bed, OK?

And then we'll sleep.

And then tomorrow, after a good breakfast... you're going to catch the killer and save the girl.

How old did you say you were?

Shut up.

A hundred years, we'll all be dead.

But the stars will still be shining.

The stars.

Of course.

And all the constellations.

At this time of year...

Virgo has just become visible in the eastern sky...

I love this.

The recent appearance of Halley's Comet...

Time is running out, Nick.

Named after an English astronomer, Edmund Halley...

In order to be brilliant... you got to be in touch with the universe.

Halley's Comet swings across our skies... once every 75 or 76 years.

That wasn't the guy last night.

Yes, it was.

Don't you read the paper?

The commissioner called me himself... to say the case is closed.

He made it clear that I should give you abuse... shit work... so you'd resign.

I don't think he even wants you in the fire department.

Why are you telling me this?

Because I don't like you. There's no place for you here.

But I respect you.

It's like the army... wartime hero, peacetime fuckup.

That's you.

Transfer back to the fire department.

I ain't got the stomach to be your brother's stooge.

I need a backup team, maybe a decoy.

I need your help for twelve more hours... then I'll go back to the farm.

I can't, even if I wanted to.

Don't give me that, skipper!

I can't get Emergency Service.

The commissioner says, from now on... all E.S. Orders go through him.

I ain't gonna put a decoy out on the street without backup.

All right.

You got what you got.

That's all the support you're going to get.

I'll look the other way till tomorrow... and then I'll expect a request for transfer.

And in the meantime, unless you see a man strangling a woman... don't call for backup... because it ain't gonna come.

Can you just lift your hair?


How's that feel?


Feel anything?


I like attention as much as the next girl, but...

No. It's fine.

Actually, it digs in a little bit right here.

I'll put some tape over that.

All right.

There's a puzzle in the computer I got to sort out.

Let's get downtown.

All right.

Here we go.

Can you mark the 11 buildings where the murders took place?

Can you make the rest of the city disappear... and just leave the dots?



Ed, there's a star missing. Find it.

Get a star chart to scale.

Find it, superimpose it on the map.

Then we'll know the building. Find it.

OK, now... we got one more problem.

Which window on which floor?

You got all that into the computer, right?

All right, Ed.


I'll be right back with the stars.

Very good, Eddie.

OK, he likes to fill in squares.

Let's fill in the murder windows.

OK. Find the pattern.

OK. All on the same floor.

Down one here.

Back up to the original floor.

Let's make the distance between the dots uniform.


What do you suppose it forms?

It can't be another astrological sign... so what is it?

Now, what is that?


I feel like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop.

It was a nifty theory.

There's seven notes in a row.

It goes...

What's that?

I just made it up.

Seven notes in a row...

No. Go back.

What is that?

That right there.


That. What you just did.

I love, I love My little calendar girl

I love, I love my lit-tle Ca-len-dar Girl Yeah

16th floor.

We're lucky in that there's only two single women... living on the 16th floor with windows facing this way... and one of them is currently visiting Disneyworld.

You're getting to be a real cop, Ed.

Thank you.

This is it.

Keep going.

We'll set up in here.

All right.

One of us always watches the door.

We'll take thirty-minute shifts.

If it's the guy, we just take note, let him go in.

If it's the woman, you know what to do.

Bernadette, you take the first watch.

What's for dinner?

Nothing edible?

Prime number, Virgo, and "Calendar Girl"?

I can say it now.

I had my doubts.

Why don't we just take him now?

Right now, it's just breaking and entering.

We got to surprise him in flagrante... homicido.


Listen, we're with the police department.

I am a police lieutenant.

Lieutenant Starkey. See?

There is a man... a killer, a strangler... waiting right inside your apartment door.

If you'd gone through that door, you'd be dead now.


So we're going to send someone in in your place... and we're going to catch this man.

Do you understand?

Is that all right with you?

All right.


Oh, God.

All right.

You ready, Bernadette? Yeah.

You scared?

It's going to be all right.

Now listen... you open the door, you close the door.

You start to take off your coat.

As soon as you feel that ribbon, you start screaming.

Be a piece of cake.

And what's the next part again?

I save you.

Don't forget that part.

If I close the door behind me, how are you getting in?


I thought you were supposed to shoot the lock off with a gun.

I don't have a gun.

You don't?

Stop worrying.

Ed, I think it'd be best if you don't come in the apartment.

You got it. I'm an artist.

I'll watch the woman.

Let's go.



Hang on!

Come on!

I'm coming!


Hang on!


You son of a bitch!


Nick, come on!




Go ahead and do your worst, you dirty, murdering pig!

You all right?

I'm alive.

My name is Lieutenant Nicholas Starkey.

You... are under arrest.

You have the right to remain silent...

You really want to play this out?

I had a hard time finding you, and I'm not about to let you go.

Call Alcoa!

You have the right to legal counsel.

You're... shit!

Give me the 2nd Precinct, please. It's an emergency.



Hello, Mrs. Starkey.

Hi. Lieutenant Starkey's not in his office.

I'd like to speak with him.

Do you know where he is?

I really don't know where...

Get the commissioner, three squad cars... tell them to get to this address.

And tell them to get the fuck there!

Nick's going at it with the strangler.

I thought the strangler was dead.

So did I!

And get me a car and get me the fuck there!

Get the fuck out of my way!

Sorry, ma'am. You'll have to excuse us.

Of course.

Hi. Hi.

Hi. Where's my door? It's on the floor.

Good. Grab the elevator.

How am I doing?


Stop kicking me. I hate that.

I told you to stop that. You're not getting away.

Why don't you just fucking accept it?

I hate this job.

See? I told you to stop.

But, no. All the force necessary, you know.

Do you hear them?

All right.

That's it.

You want to fight?

All right. Come on!

Deploy these fucking men properly!

What's going on?

Nick's in there with the strangler.

What about the guy we got?

It came over the radio on the way here.

They just made the guy we pegged for the strangler.

He got out of the loony bin about three days ago.

He's been in there two years.


OK, are we rolling?

Sorry, lady. Police personnel only.

Do you know who I am?


Get down!

Come on.

I wonder if I could get a cup of coffee.

Preferably espresso.

Does anybody know this guy? Who he is ain't important.

That's the problem with him.

He's nobody.

Get the photog out here!

Let's go! Come on!

What are you doing here?

I left Frank.

You'll never change.

Go away.

You love me. No, Christine.

I loved an idea I had that looked like you.

Here's the check.

Darling... don't say I never gave you anything.

Good luck, Bernadette.

The world's either great or wretched, isn't it?

So many people are just finished.

You think?

I don't know, really. All I know is I'm going home.

I quit.

The job?

Yes. I'm going home, I'm going to mix some paint... and I'm gonna try and do something original.

See you.


I want to make you dinner.

You know... in a couple of days.

That'd be nice.

I want to make you haggis.

What's haggis?

It's a Scottish dish.

You take the stomach of a sheep, and then you stuff it... with the sheep's lungs, liver, and heart... some onions, suet, and oatmeal.

And then you boil the whole thing.

I don't know. Sounds a little weird... but I'm game to try it.