The Last Flight of Noah's Ark (1980) Script






Hey! COSLOUGH: All right, Mr. Benchley.

BENCHLEY: Thank you, Coslough.

Noah Dugan?

Yeah. What do you guys want?

Well, you owe a lot of money, Mr. Dugan, and Mr. Parker wants it now.

You've got a hell of a nerve barging in here like this.

Where have you guys been anyway? Parker owes me.

That red-hot parlay I've been driving paid off in the ninth last night when Attaboy Star got his nose under the wire in front.

50,000 smackers. Fat city!

Fat nothing, Mr. Dugan. Attaboy Star was disqualified in that race.

Set back to third. Apparently, he interfered in the stretch.

You got 24 hours to come up with 5,000.

Mr. Parker's willing to wait a week for the rest.



That's just a reminder, Mr. Dugan.


Mr. Dugan, 24 hours.

How many jobs have you had in the last two years?


And on the last one?

Well, there was a little turbulence.

I'm sorry. The word's out...

Wherever you go, there goes trouble.

And I can't afford that.

Come on, Slabotsky, I broke both arms flying stunts for you.

I need a job. I would if I could.

Hey, why don't you try Tallmantz?

They're supplying all of the pilots for a war movie over at 20th.

You can fly those crates standing on your head.

Yeah, I saw 'em. The picture's been canceled.

War movies are out. Rocket ships are in.

I don't qualify.

All the pilots are made out of tin.

But I got that flight gassed up, ready to go.

Uh-huh, not with me. No, uh-uh.

You couldn't pay me triple to take it up.

STONEY: Dugan!

Oh, what a surprise. Here I was just thinking about you and you pop up out of nowhere.

Stow it, Stoney. I need a job or I wouldn't be here.

I thought you'd never ask.

Come. I'll show you.

This is your lucky day.

This is the easiest money ever made.

A straight hop to that Pacific island.

The flight plans have been cleared. One passenger, a bit of cargo.

You drop them there, refuel... What kind of plane is it?

You come back via Hawaii. Pick up another cargo, oh, and while you're there, take yourself a few days' vacation.

Have yourself a time! What kind of a plane is it?

The word is out, Dugan. You're in big trouble.

You've been playing the horses without very much success.

Open the door.

No job, no family, no friends with enough dinero to bail you out, with one exception, your old buddy, Stoney.

Open the door, Stoney. Will you open the door?

I know, I know you're a proud man, Dugan.

A man who hates to hang his head like a whipped dog.

Therefore, I don't want you to feel that you have to be excessively grateful to me for giving you this rare opportunity.

Open the door! You got it.


WOMAN: Children!

Close the door, Stoney.

Did I just see what I think I saw?

What do you think you saw?

Kids, and animals, and a moldy B-29.

The kids aren't going.

They're here to wave goodbye to the animals.

They were all brought up at the orphanage.

No, Stoney. No?

Animals and planes do not mix.

You never know what they're gonna do when you're in the air.

It's a hazard, it's dangerous, and it ain't worth it.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

Those are religious animals. What?

They were brought up at the orphanage.

The lady in charge is a missionary.

She said prayers over them. (DOOR OPENS)

Oh. There she is now.

Oh, come here, my dear.

Come, my dear, my angel.

I'd like you to say hello to your pilot, Captain Noah Dugan.

Hello, Captain Dugan.

May I present Miss Bernadette Lafleur and Miss, uh...

Charlotte Braithwaite.

Charlotte Braithwaite, who isn't going.

BERNADETTE: I'm so happy to meet you, Captain.

I've been looking forward to this day for such a long time.

I've been telling the captain about the wonderful work you've been doing with those wonderful natives on that wonderful island.

What was the name of the island? Makuarana.


But I haven't done anything yet. This is my first mission.

How soon can we leave, Captain? With me? Never.

I don't understand.

I'm not flying you and the Bronx Zoo anywhere.

But I've already paid. Well, get your money back, fast.

It's gone.

Well, you know, expense and...

Mr. Stoney, I hope this doesn't mean you've cheated me.

Because if that's the case, there will be retribution.

I'm a missionary, but I am not a pushover.

I'll go to the police.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute, please.


Dugan, I could go to jail.

Maybe they'll give you your old cell back.

What are you trying to do to me? Please. I'll make it worth your while.

I swear it. How much?

Two Gs upon your return.

I need 5,000 now. 5,000? I haven't got it, I swear.

Okay, okay. I want a certified check for $3,000 waiting for me in Honolulu, on my way back, or I don't ship your return cargo.

3,000? You got it. It's a deal.

Okay, let me see the plane.

CHILD: Boy, this is really nice.

DUGAN: Gangway, kids, gangway.

Watch it, kid. Those things are dangerous.

Brutus isn't dangerous, he's a friend.

Does he know that?

Lady, you are past your prime.

What? Huh?

Dugan, how about it?

CHILD: Petey, come back.

Stoney, I never saw anything... CHILD: Petey, come back here!

CHILD: Petey, come back here!

Bobby and Julie, what are you doing?

Petey went into this tunnel, and he'll hurt himself.

Oh, her duck.


It's started already, and we're not even in the air.

Excuse me, lady. Come here, duck.

Here, duck, duck. Here, duck, duck, duck.

CHILD: Don't worry, Petey. He'll get you.

Be careful, Mr. Dugan.

DUGAN: Don't worry, I know what I'm doing.

You stupid duck, come here. Yes.

Come here. Come here, ducky.

Come here. I got you! I got you, you little spatulated pigeon.

Try that again and it'll be candied yams and applesauce.



Coslough, you don't suppose our friend Dugan is trying to give us the slip here, do ya?


Yeah, that's what I thought. Come on, let's get over there.

Stoney, do yourself a favor and set fire to this bucket of bolts and collect the insurance.

And while you're at it, get yourself another pilot.

Mr. Stoney, if he goes, I go to the police.

Dugan, you can't walk out now.

That woman has the Lord's work to do, she needs you.

You're right, Stoney, I'll do it. But we gotta leave now!

Now? Now! You see that car over there?

There's two guys in there want to talk to me and I do not want to talk to them.

I don't care what you do. I'll fly your plane, just get rid of them.


Okay, let's get the rest of the animals loaded.

But Mr. Dugan... Move it, lady. We'll talk later.


Uh, yeah, I, uh...

I think he's in my office.

Follow me.

This way.

All right, Mr. Dugan, would you take Agnes?

She won't hurt you.

She won't hurt you. (SQUEALING)

All right, sweetheart.


Got him? Open the door for me.

Uh, yeah, he must have stepped out for a minute.

But he should be back shortly. Come in. Come in.

Let's sit down and wait for him here.

Yes. Make yourselves comfortable, gentlemen.

Sit down. Sit down.

Come on, you mule-headed slab-sided tub of meat!

Get up here before I leave you behind!

Hollering won't do any good.

Yeah? Who says? My dad. He knows all about animals.

He said you gotta talk slow and easy to them.

Let them know you want to be their friend.

Kid, I don't want to be their friend. I hate animals.

They stink, they're dirty, and they're dumb.

And they're dynamite when they get scared.

Brutus isn't dirty and he isn't dumb.

Watch out, I'll do it.

Oh, yeah, you're going to do it, huh? Yeah.


Here, Brutus. Come on, boy. Come on!


Yeah, well, you can put another bug in his ear, kid.

Tell him if he raises any kind of a ruckus while we're in the air, he'll end up on a barbecue.

You're the one that belongs in a barbecue.

Howling at helpless creatures.


Come on, Brutus. This is no place for you.

Come here, kid. Just watch yourself.

The ramp's going up. (RAMP LIFTING)

He'll be back.

He'll be right back.

Okay, kids, we're closing shop. Everybody off.

Uh, Miss, uh, come on. Let's get the little darlings off.

We're closing shop.

Be careful. Follow me, children.

So long, Petey.

I'll never forget you.

You really are my best buddy.

I'm going to miss you a lot.

And you be careful.

And you be a good boy now.


Well, it looks like the big day has finally arrived.

We're going to miss you something fierce.

I'm gonna miss you, too.

Why can't someone else go to that old island?

Why does it have to be you?

Because I'm a farm girl.

I can teach them what they ought to know.

(STAMMERS) I got to go.

Come on, miss, we got to pull out.

Bye-bye. Bye-bye.

DUGAN: Up you go. There you are.

That captain guy doesn't like animals.

He said they're dirty and they're dumb, and he'll barbecue Brutus.

She wouldn't let him.

She might need help.

Are we ready to start?

Just about.

Julie, I'm going with them.

They won't let you. They'll never see me.

I'll crawl through that hole like that man did.

But he started the engines.

Got to hurry. Bye, Julie.

Wait for me.

BOBBY: Hurry, Julie! I'm up.

I'm getting up. BOBBY: Hurry. All right, Julie.

Julie, I can't make it!



Aah! Bobby! Bobby! Bobby!

Bobby! Bobby! Bobby!

Here goes nothing.


Who's in that plane?

What plane? That plane!

Uh... It's Dugan.


Come on, the car.



They're waving us goodbye.


They're not the only ones.

Hold on to your bloomers, honey!

Come on, Coslough, step on it!

The car!

Coslough, do something!

Right, Mr. Benchley.

That'll fix 'em.

BENCHLEY: (SHOUTING) Coslough! Yike!

(LAUGHS) Yeah!

Who was in the car?

Bill collectors.

You owe them money? Not anymore.

Must you pollute the entire cockpit, Mr. Dugan?

Oh, I always smoke cigars for takeoffs and landings.

That's the tough part. You'll get used to them, Bernie.

It's Bernadette, Mr. Dugan.

Oh, well, have it your own way, Reverend.


(WOMAN SINGING) If I were a star A tiny star You'd be my starlight Half of me is me The other half of me is you

If I were a bird A tiny bird You'd be my wings For only half Of me is me The other half Of me is you Reaching out And touching hands Is a way of sharing

Having faith And caring Will always see us through

If I were a tree You'd be my roots We'd grow together Half of me is me The other half Is you


Do we have to listen to that junk?

Junk, Mr. Dugan? It's boring, Bernie.

Bach was one of the greatest composers who ever lived.

Don't you appreciate good music?

I'll tell you what, Bernie, I'll make you a deal.

You turn off that noise, and I won't smoke anymore.




Well, we're on course.

(SIGHS) So...

(EXPLODING) I don't believe it.

Thanks loads, Stoney. Thanks a lot.

Are we on fire?

Like everything else in this scrapheap, the automatic pilot is kaput, finito, finished.

Oh, that's all?

Mr. Dugan, don't worry. If you're tired and you want a little nap, I can manage. You?

Yes. You can fly?

Yes. Well, I've had a few hours' instruction on the mission's Cessna.

This is a little bit bigger, but with some help from you, I'm sure I could cope.

Cessna? Cessna.

Lady, you couldn't fly this crate with a couple hundred hours of instructions.

I wouldn't be so sure, Mr. Dugan. Anyhow, do what you want.

I was just offering.

All right, Amelia Earhart, be my guest.

Just keep your compass at 250 degrees.

That's very good, Bernie, I'm impressed.

You know, it's amazing what a couple of hours of flight instructions can do.

Aren't you gonna help me?

You said you knew how to fly.

Mr. Dugan.

Pull up, up. I'm pulling!

Up, up, up.

Up, up, up, up, up.


What the hell is this duck doing in here?

BOBBY: Leave him alone.

I'll get him. BERNADETTE: Bobby!

Julie... What are you doing in here?

We came here to make sure the animals made the trip safely.

Well, how did you get on board? Through the bomb bay doors.

What? You might've been killed.


It's Melinda. She seems awfully upset.

She probably heard about the barbecue.

Melinda? You mean there's more kids back there?

No, no, no, Melinda's the cow.

Brutus' girlfriend. She's getting sick.

She is? Oh, great. That's all we need.

What the hell did I get into?

You shouldn't curse in front of ladies.

Now look, kid, don't you tell me how to talk.

I'd better go... No, you stay there. I'll handle it.

Just keep your hands steady on the wheel and follow the compass.

You can do that, can't you? Aye, aye, sir.

Don't be scared, baby.

Oh, that's better.



Oh, shut up. All we need is another one like you.

JULIE: Mr. Dugan? Mr. Dugan, wake up.

Mr. Dugan? Brutus didn't mean it.

It's just that you shouldn't have yelled at him like that.

Mr. Dugan?


Miss Lafleur! Miss Lafleur! What? What?

There's been a little accident.

I'm scared, Miss Lafleur. What?

Brutus knocked Mr. Dugan out.

Oh, no!

Okay, okay, okay, children, I'm sure he'll come out of it.

Just, uh, loosen his collar, and Julie, perhaps you can wet a cloth and put it on his forehead, and let me know when he's okay and don't worry, God is my copilot.

I hope he flies better than you.

Peace offering. Thank you.

You're not angry anymore?

Ah, what the hell, Bernie. It's a new day.

In about a minute, you are going to see the most beautiful sunrise you've ever seen.

Keep your eye back there, back there as far as you can toward the tail.

Keep watching, it happens very fast, like an explosion. All red and orange...

You've never really seen one until you've seen one from up here.

What is it doing over there? I don't know.

I can't believe it. It's not supposed to come in off the wing, it's supposed to come in off the tail.

Excuse me.

We're still on course.

We've been flying the wrong course.

What do you mean we've been flying the wrong course?

I mean, the battery from this cassette player's been interfering with the magnetic field of compass.

It's been giving me a false reading. How long was that hanging there?

I don't know. A long time.

Oh, great. We had a certain amount of fuel to get us to your island, and we've burnt that up flying in the wrong direction for God knows how long. So, what're you gonna do?

What am I gonna do?

Oh, I'm gonna squeeze as much mileage out of whatever fuel we have left. Turn back?

No, we've gone too far.

DUGAN: Mayday, mayday.

Boeing B-29, Zero-November-Niner


Mayday, mayday.

Boeing B-29, Zero-November-Niner


Do you read me? Can anyone read me?

Hello! Hello!

That's great. Even if I knew where we were, I couldn't tell anyone.

Did you hear me?

Do you really think that'll do any good?

Do you think it can do any harm, Mr. Dugan?

Did you find any life jackets?

Just one, and that fell to pieces.

I'll kill Stoney.


What's that? What's happening?

We're running out of gas.

Are we going to crash, Mr. Dugan?

Don't worry, Julie. We'll make it.

Why don't you just land?

Just where would you suggest I land, Mr. Know-it-all?

Over there on that island.

Kid, you got the eyes of an eagle.

We're going to do it, Bernie.

We're dropping.

That happens when you've only got two engines holding up a four-engine plane.

Can we make it?

Well, it gets a lot more difficult with no engines, so you'd better start praying again, baby.

Kids, get into that engineer seat. Strap yourselves in, and hold on.

Hey, don't...

Thanks, Bernie.

Get behind that wheel, I may need some help.

Oh, Mr. Dugan.

Don't worry, kid.


There they go.

I'm gonna try and pancake her into the beach from the water.

Hold on!




Come on, let's go see how the animals are.

Thank you. You're welcome.

Thank you, Mr. Dugan.

You must be the best pilot in the whole world.

Ah, out of the mouths of babes.

Well, I'm sorry I badmouthed you, old girl.

You did real good, real good.



You just sit here quietly, all right? I'll get some bandages and a splint.

You might have sprained it. It's gonna be all right.

I don't think it's serious.

Well, Mr. Dugan, what does the situation look like?


I mean, what do you suggest we do?

I don't know, but after that, I'm going to take a swim.

Oh, really, Mr. Dugan.

God has given us minds, and we must use them.

Positive thinking is the key.

We have been spared, and we will be rescued, I'm sure of it.

But God helps those who help themselves.

We must search for any inhabitants of this place.

We must look for food and water.

But first, we must prepare ourselves for the night.

A corral must be built, the animals taken out and placed there.

The plane interior must be cleaned so that we can use it for sleeping quarters.

Oh, and some partition must be put up for privacy.

Oh, of course. Well, let's get on with it.

A little honest work never hurt anyone.

There's an ax in the plane.

We'll use that to cut palms to make fences.

Wanna bet she's also an Eagle Scout?

Not bad, huh? Mmm.

What'd you do? I'm afraid I've gotten some blisters.

Oh, well, a little honest work never hurt anybody.

Bobby! Come on. Bring 'em in.

BOBBY: All right! Come on, sheep.

Well, here we go again.


Come on. Come on, you stubborn thing.

Now... The pigs.


I don't know, just grab one.

Hey, come here, you. Come on, get back here.


I got one.





We'll be back.

Well, can't we come? Absolutely not.

There's no telling what's in that jungle. You stay put here.


Come on, Julie. Let's go to the corral.

Come on, Brutus. Come on.

BERNADETTE: I wonder if there are people here.

Ah, there's probably a Hilton hotel just around the corner.

Don't worry.

BERNADETTE: I hope they're friendly.

Bernie, I'm surprised at you.

Your religion dictates positive thinking, remember?

JULIE: Brutus!


BOBBY: Brutus. Brutus, come back here!


Brutus! Stop!

Brutus, come back!


Brutus, you're a naughty boy now.

Come along before I get mad at you.

That isn't the way.

BOBBY: Sure it is. Brutus knows.

JULIE: I wish I had Petey with me. Ducks know their way better than bulls.

This is not the way, either.

Yes, it is. No, it isn't.

BOBBY: You'll see.

Tell me something. What made you become a missionary?

I didn't think people did that anymore.


Mr. Dugan, do you really want to know?

Of course I do.


I come from a big family.

My mother died.

And I was the oldest, so...

I pretty much raised my brothers and sister.

When they were ready to leave home, I was out of a job.

The only thing I knew was helping people.

I tried nursing for a while, but that wasn't quite what I wanted, so then I thought of missionary work.

Why didn't you just get married and start your own family?

Oh, well...

I believed that wasn't the way for me.

Anyway, the welfare of others matters more to me than my personal desires.

Some guy let you down, huh?

Mr. Dugan, you have no right. I got as much right as you.

Walking around with your nose in the air, like you know more than anybody else.

I guess when you spend your whole life bossing little kids around, you think you can do it with grownups, too.

Hey, who do you think you are talking to me like that?

You insensitive... Ah-ah. Don't say it, Bernie.

Listen, stop calling me Bernie!

Whatever you say, Miss Lafleur.

Come on, boy, come on. Whoa, boy, whoa, boy. Whoa.


Come on, let's go tell Mr. Dugan what we found.

DUGAN: Must have been a military outpost during the war.

BERNADETTE: Those men are behaving as if the war is still going on.

And maybe they don't know it's over.

I read where the news never reached some of 'em.

What war?

Well, we'll just go right down there and disabuse them of that notion.

Are you out of your mind? They'd cut you down before you had a chance to open your mouth.

We don't know how many of them there are.

We've got to do something.

Yeah, beat a hasty retreat back to the plane, where there's a little armor between them and us.

Come on.


Watch it, Bobby.


BERNADETTE: Are we supposed to hide in here forever, Mr. Dugan?

What's the matter with you people? This is no joke.

They're out there waiting for us. They have real guns with real bullets.

I'll help you, Mr. Dugan.

Thanks, but that doesn't make me feel a whole lot better.

What would? A machine gun.

Well, it seems to me you might have a better plan.

If I had a plan, lady, I would've kept going the first time I saw ya.

I bet my dad could have figured out a strategy.

Hey, how about playing General Custer?

We could send Brutus out there on a cavalry charge.

He might get shot. Yeah.

If the war is over, now why can't we go out there and explain it to them? I'm sure we could resolve this amicably.

Amicably? We just crashed on their island in an Air Force bomber.

What makes you think they'd believe you?

I never lie, Mr. Dugan.

Can you say that in Japanese?

Hey, I don't care what you say.

I have a job to do, and I'm going to do it.



You come out! Surrender!

Be prisoner of war or die!

Friends, huh?

Those aren't exactly peashooters they're holding.



I don't believe it.


Last chance! I count to five!







Petey, get away from there!

Petey! Petey! Stay calm.

The grenade's a dud, too. Just stay where you are.

Here goes. Geronimo!



(SCREAMS) Get out of here!



And don't ever come back! You hear me?

I guess we showed 'em, huh?

You were terrific. Wasn't he, Bobby?

He was okay. Thanks a lot, kid.

Those poor men. They were humiliated.

Humiliated? I guess you'd have liked it better if they'd have shot me.

I did not say that, Mr. Dugan.

Well, then stop feeling sorry for them.

I still think we should make friends with them.

Your way isn't the answer.

I don't believe you, lady.

We nearly get killed and you wanna open a Sunday school for the enemy.

Now you listen and you listen good.

I'm in command here and I say that nobody, but nobody's gonna open peace negotiations with those guys until I say so.


Now we'll have to stand watch throughout the night.

You take the kids back to the plane. I'll take the first half.

Move it!


BOBBY: Good night.

Good night.

Mr. Dugan was very brave today, Bobby.

I still don't like him.

I thought you only smoked on takeoffs and landings.

Yeah. But tonight's special.

I figure if I'm gonna go, I wanna be doing something I like.

I wanna talk to you.

What about?

Well, if, uh, I have been less than considerate to your feelings, I'd like to apologize.

What's the catch?

There's no catch.

I just think...

That I may have said some things to you that I shouldn't have.

I guess that goes for me, too, Bernie.

I think we share a common problem.

We both seem to have a certain difficulty with relationships.

I just want to say that I'd like to try and get along better.

All right?


It's my turn on guard.



Well, uh, if you hear anything, holler. Be careful of that.

It would be the Christian thing to do to make friends with them if they come back, wouldn't it?

Don't forget to holler.

Hey, kids, did you see Bernie? No, why?

Where are you going? To find Bernie.

She's probably started World War III by now.

He really is a pain.

Come on, let's go swimming! I'm gonna beat you.


Hello, in there!

I come in peace!


Anybody home?

Don't be afraid. I'm a friend.




No, wait!


I come in peace.

In the name of the Universe Society of Quebec.

We're a friendly mission. We wish you no harm.

Go on!


I must speak with you. It's very important.

It's about the war with America.

The war is over.



Bulls, ducks, a cow, kids... What did I ever do to deserve this?


Mmm. Mmm?

Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm.



No, thank you. I can't eat another thing. Thank you.

You like?

I like... Too much.

You lucky.

Today, me cook.

Tomorrow, Commander Hiro.

Hiro. Hiro.

(LAUGHS) Him not so good.




How you like that? BERNADETTE: No more.

MAN: Take that!

BERNADETTE: No, please. No more. I've had enough.






Hiro, Cleveland, stop.

Mr. Dugan's a friend.


What's going on?

Look what you've done. You ruined everything.


You mean they weren't torturing you?

I'm perfectly fine. Can't you see that?

The war is over, Mr. Dugan.


And now...

I would like to introduce from the Imperial Japanese Navy, Commander Hiro.


And Lieutenant... Kurishima.

Known as Cleveland.

Captain Dugan.



Hmm. My mother visit America in 1924.

Her favorite city, Cleveland.

Name me for that.

Teach me first-class English.


And they have been here for 35 years with no contact with the world, not even a radio.

But they know now we're going to be very good friends.

Aren't we?



CLEVELAND: Yes, friends.

Now everyone clasp hands.






That's when they lost their comrades, the radio...

They spent years transporting what they had left up to the hill.

I mean, what courage.

What perseverance.

You're very quiet, Mr. Dugan. I told you not to leave.

That's it. Your pride's hurt.

I was dictated by a higher authority.

Huh? Oh.

Yeah, well, I was worried about you. And I thought you might need my help.

I can take care of myself just fine, thank you.

You don't give an inch, do ya?

What if they'd hurt ya? But they didn't.

Well, how was I to know?

So you came charging in like a bull in a China shop.

Well, Mr. Dugan, you, like the rest of the world, must learn that violence is not the only solution to problems.

Well, enough of that. Let's get the food ready.

You get it ready. I'm not hungry.


I'm sorry.

I said I was sorry.

You'll wake the children. Well, we can go outside.

BOBBY: Julie, come on. JULIE: Okay, I'm coming.

I don't wanna fight anymore. Neither do I.

Look, I may do things differently than what you like but I was trying to save you.

I know that now, Mr. Dugan.

And would you please stop with this mister stuff?

You only make me feel like my old man.

Dugan, just Dugan. That's enough.

Right, Dugan.

Look, Bernie, I must've walked five miles tonight trying to figure out what I'm feeling.

And what hit me is...

I care about you.

I'm sorry... Shh.

Good night. Good night.

BOBBY: Look out. 'Night, kids.

How can she like him?

Well, he's kind of cute. Cute?

Well, you know, Bobby, he's really funny.

He reminds me of Petey when I first got him.

Always squawking and trying to peck people.

But he didn't mean it.

I'm right about him. You'll see.


We won't make it, Dugan.

We'll make it. These extra fuel tanks are made out of rubber.

We can make a raft out of it and we can float off this mud pile.

It'll never work. Why not?

All you did as a pilot was get us crashed on a desert island.

So how come you think you can be a sea pilot?

Robert, the fact that we were off course was not Mr. Dugan's fault.

Kid, when your muscles are as big as your mouth, you'll be a real help.

So shut up and pull.

Come on, pull.



Make raft.

Sail away.

Go home. Be happy.




That idea no good.

On ocean, you die quick.

Well, if you've got a better idea, let's hear it.






Commander number one officer.

Him idea, number one.

No make raft. Make boat.

Make a boat out of what? Out of prane.


I have problem with R's.

Yeah, well, you'll have a lot more trouble making a boat out of that plane.

But prane already is boat, just wrong side up.



You see, turn prane over, what you got?

An upside-down plane.

No. You got boat.

Look, see. Look, see.

Tail becomes a rudder.

Rudder, huh?

And wings inside empty. Float good.

Better than raft. Better than raft, huh?

Make big sail. Have good power.

You're still gonna have one wing bigger than the other and that's gonna put you off balance.

And then the engines are gonna pull you down in the water.

No, I don't think so. Oh, easy fix. No problem.

You like idea?

I guess you think it's a great idea, huh?

Yeah, I like it. Well, I don't.

I'm not so sure I want anyone chopping up my plane.

Oh, believe me, it no fly again.

You want stay here until someone find you?

Well, a couple of days, a few weeks...

How about 35 years?


That's great. I'm proud of you.


I'm really proud. That's really great.

Why didn't I think of this?


Pull! Everybody, pull!





It's going!

Hey, those guys really know what they're doing.







We ready now! Turn over!



(LAUGHS) Okay. Okay.







I need a very large piece.

To put in the center.





Our flag strong.

Make good sail. You use.

Thank you very much.

I'll put it at the top of the sail, a place of honor.



What are you doing?

Getting the animals on board.

The animals can't come.


Well, it's dangerous enough without them.

We got to save ourselves.

You mean you're just gonna leave them here?

Well, they're only animals.

They'll be fine.

Look, I know you like them...

I love them.

They trust us to take care of them.

Yeah, I understand.

BOBBY: You don't understand.

You don't know about loving them because you don't even like them.

Julie told me you were just teasing about Brutus, but you really meant it.

This proves it.

Now wait a minute.

You be quiet.

You got stuck with all of us. Now you want to get rid of us.

Julie told me you're really nice underneath and you just talk grouchy.

And she said she was gonna still love you anyway.

Well, look, Julie. (SOBBING QUIETLY)

You have to understand.

You still think he's so great after all?

He's gonna leave the animals here to die.

Do you?



If we're going to take the animals with us, we'd better make them comfortable beds to sleep in, okay?


I love you, Mr. Dugan.

Bobby! Bobby!


The animals can come on the plane with us.


What's this?

Do you like it?

Well, I hate the name Noah.

Oh. I'm sorry.

I didn't know.

No, wait a second. It could be worse.

I guess we could leave it.




DUGAN: Bernie!


Any sign of them?

Have you seen them?

Where are they? I don't know.

It's almost high tide. If they don't get here soon, we've blown a whole day.

Are the supplies loaded? All loaded.

Well, we got to go now.


Are the animals secure?

They're okay.

If that plane sinks because of the weight of those animals, then I'm gonna cut my throat. Oh...

Get ready. We can't leave without them.

It's okay, they'll swim out after us.

HIRO: Wait!


Wait! Wait for us!

Wait, wait! Wait! Come on!

Okay. We're coming. We're coming.

Wait. Wait. Come on.

CLEVELAND: Okay. Wait.

What kept you guys?

We take care of business. Hurry!

But I thought you told me high tide was at 11:00.

Yes. 11:00.

Hurry. Hurry.

Of course. Eleven.

Please. You hurry. Hurry.

Get prane to sea. (EXCLAIMING)

Well, okay, okay. But you're the one...


I don't believe it.


Leave island, leave nothing.

Yeah, well... Well, what if we're not ready?

If... If the plane breaks up, if we got to go back for repairs?

All of your equipment, nothing left?

Commander Hiro very efficient.



Well, everybody, you know what you have to do.

Take up your positions.

(WOMAN SINGING) If I were a star A tiny star You'd be my starlight Half of me is me The other half of me is you If I were a bird A tiny bird You'd be my wings For only half of me is me The other half of me is you

Good work, you guys.

Well, Bernie, next stop, Hawaii.

God willing.

If I were a tree You'd be my roots We'd grow together For only half of me is me The other half of me is you

Hey, Dugan.

What? What is it?

I'm sorry I had to wake you, it's important.

I was reading the Bible and I got an idea about sending a message.

Oh, is there a chapter on radio repair?

Genesis 8:8.

"And Noah sent forth a dove from him

"to see if the waters were abated off the face of the ground."

Only one thing, Bernie.

We don't have a dove.

We're counting on you to deliver this message, Petey.

Keep heading that way until you get there.

Got it? (QUACKING)


BOBBY: Be careful, Petey!

Is he going to make it?

If he does, he'd better speak Chinese.

Hawaii's the other way.

Maybe lucky tomorrow.

Catch fish, hmm?

Oh. Yeah.

We could use some.


Dear Lord, thank you for what we're about to eat, and let us be truly thankful.

And if you have an extra minute, give Petey a little push towards Hawaii... Please?


Good girl, Melinda. You're doing just fine.

Here, Brutus. Here.


Brutus, you have to try and eat something, or you'll starve.

Good thing you're not seasick, Melinda.

Any eggs in the chicken coops, Bobby?

I'm going to check now.

Still no luck, huh?

Yes. No fish.

Well, maybe you're using the wrong kind of bait.


Commander Hiro say something wrong.

Not our fault.

I have five, Julie.

(SIGHS) Well, that's better than four.

I'll take them to the kitchen.

Brutus, try this.

It's real good for you.

Hey, what do you think you're doing?

I'm trying to make Brutus better.

Not anymore, you're not.

That's our food supply, and I won't have you throwing it away.

It's only a little bit.

Look, kid, our rations aren't gonna last forever.

So let's get one thing straight, animals get animal food, not people food.

You dish that out.

I'll take care of this.


Share this with Hiro and Cleveland.

Okay. Thank you. Okay?

For you, sir.

Is this mine? Yes.

Well, then I can do whatever I want with it, right?

Oh, yes.

Well, then I'm going to give it to Brutus.

Well, now I know why he likes animals. He's as stubborn as a mule.

Mules aren't stubborn.

It's just that some people are too dumb to get them to do what they want them to do.

He doesn't mean to be rude, he's just...

Don't give me any of that orphan boy flak.

He'll make out okay. I did.

I'm sorry, Miss Lafleur.

We checked every coop, and there aren't any eggs.

All right, Bobby.

Thank you.

Well, if our friends don't come up with some fish soon, we're down to emergency rations.

The hens aren't laying anymore, and Melinda, she doesn't want to give anymore milk.

Yeah, I know. And I'm sick of rice.

Well, look, if the chickens aren't laying anymore...

BERNADETTE: Yes, that's what I had on my mind.


Bobby, I know how you feel, but I'm afraid we're going to have to.

We wouldn't have to if Hiro and Cleveland knew how to catch fish.

The Japanese invented fishing, kid.

If they can't catch them, nobody can.

I bet I can.

Sure, sure. What are you going to do, talk them into taking the bait?

Now you look, me and Frankie used to catch a lot of fish back at the orphanage.

I'm not in the mood for a kid story right now.

I may be a kid but that doesn't mean I'm stupid.

Oh, Bobby, that's enough. Captain Dugan just can't...

Bernie, Bernie... He's right.

Let's hear him out.

Well, you see, there was a stream where we used to catch catfish.

And, you see, what we'd do was hang a lantern over the side of our rowboat at night.

And then, you see, the fish would swim up to the lantern to see what it was.

So why couldn't we fix up some kind of light here?

Bobby, you're a genius.

We got the biggest lanterns you could want.

Come on, kid, let's go fishing.







Not bad, eh? Mmm. Very nice. Nice.

Look, Miss Lafleur.

I know. It's like our private aquarium.

Come, let's tell the others to start fishing. There's a lot.

Can't I stay and watch?

You can watch later. Come on.

The more lines out, the better.

All right.








Oh, Julie.

Take it easy, Julie. What's the matter?

Over there!

JULIE: I saw a shark!

Julie, it's all right. He came at me!

Yes, yes, it's all right now. Okay. Okay.

Commander say shark reason no fish.

Then we gotta get rid of the shark.

Ah, dangerous at night.

Well, it's now or no more fish.

Are you with me? I'm with you.


Hmm... Okay.

Okay. We catch.



That's all we have left.

Well, we can't help it, Bernie.

We got to use it.

"Cast thy bread upon the waters, "for thou shalt find it after many days."


Ecclesiastes. Stick around, Bernadette, I'm full of surprises.

Tell the kids to stay below. It could get rough.

All right.


Put it in.




Come on!

Come on! Get the rope!


Hold on! Tie it down!


DUGAN: Hold on. Feels like a whale! Hold on.

DUGAN: Just be careful! Just hold it.

Just hold on, now. Hold it, hold on.

DUGAN: Keep holding on with all your might!



Let's pull! Come on, now!


What happened? I thought you had him!

DUGAN: Hey you, get off of there! Just get off.



Mr. Dugan!

No, Dugan! No! No! No, Dugan!

No, don't jump!

Mr. Dugan! (COUGHING) Come back, Dugan!

Don't worry. Good boy. Come on. It's okay.

Please, God, help him.


CLEVELAND: The shark! The shark! Dugan!

Dugan! Come back!

Hurry! Hurry!


Come on.

Come on! Come on, Dugan!

Hurry! Hurry! Up here!

Hurry! Come on, Dugan!


JULIE: Bobby! Bobby!

You okay?


I was wrong about you, Mr. Dugan.

I'm sorry. You're sorry, huh?

When the hell are you gonna get it through that thick skull of yours to do what you're told?

You nearly got yourself killed!

You nearly got me killed!

Cleveland, take him downstairs and get him changed.

All right. Okay, here we go. (GRUNTS)

That was a very good shot.

CLEVELAND: Drink. Drink.

Is hot.

Is good for you.

Mmm. Yeah. Thanks.

Julie, Cleveland, could you leave us alone just for a minute, please?



Well, how are you feeling?

I'm okay.

I'm sorry I had to come down on you so hard.

You were right. It was a dumb thing to do.

And I will never do anything like it again.

Well, everybody does a dumb thing every once in a while.



Well, we're on our way again.

What's the matter?

Come on, what's up?

That's funny.

We're floating around in the middle of nowhere, and this morning it hit me... It's all my fault.

Oh, Bernie.

It's my fault.

I dream up this idea of making farmers out of Makuaranas.

I bet they're quite happy as they are.

I forced my society into letting me go.

I convince you and Stoney to fly me in a plane that no sensible person should get into. I put a spell on the compass, and if it weren't for me, those children wouldn't be here.

What have I been doing?

Listen, Bernie, you've kept those kids going when they had no reason to.

You kept me going, too.

Are we gonna make it? You bet we are.

Petey's out there right now flying his little heart out, if he hasn't already reached land.

And I'm sure they sent word when we didn't get to your island.

Planes are probably looking for us right now.

And we're not far from shipping lanes, a freighter could come.

I love you.

I love you, too.

Big wind.

We better take the sail in. Mmm-hmm.




Will it be a bad storm, Miss Lafleur?

I'm afraid it will be, Julie.











Hurry up.

Come on, Hiro! (STRAINING)

DUGAN: Come on!


It's over!

We made it!

We made it!

For somebody past her prime, you're just amazing, old lady.

Just amazing.

Gonna take more than a storm to sink you!



Oh, you come quickly!

He fall down. Very bad.

I think he dying.

Easy, Brutus.


He is going to be okay, isn't he, Miss Lafleur?


He isn't.

He is going to be okay. You'll see.

Mr. Dugan?

BOBBY: He is going to be okay.


No! It has to be done, Bobby.

You don't want Brutus go on suffering like this.

No! Stay back!

Stay away from him!

What would your dad want you to do now, Bobby?

I never knew my dad.

He left me at the orphanage and then he went away!

They didn't care!

Well, that was then and this is now.

And there are people here who do care, Bobby.

Like who? Well, all of us care and we care about Brutus, too.

Stay back!

Stay away from him!







Goodbye, Brutus.




MAN: (ANNOUNCING) Now hear this, now hear this.

- All hands fore and art... (BUZZER RINGING)

I don't believe it. (CHEERING)

Believe, Dugan. Believe.

PRIEST: Do you, Noah, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold...

(WOMAN SINGING) If I were a star A tiny star You'd be my starlight Half of me is me The other half of me is you If I were a bird A tiny bird You'd be my wings For only half of me is me The other half of me is you Reaching out And touching hands Is a way of sharing Sharing Having faith and caring Will always see us through

If I were a tree You'd be my roots Oh, we'd grow together Half of me is me The other half is you