The Mistle-Tones (2012) Script

(SINGING) Jingle bells, jingle bells jingle all the way Oh, what fun it is to ride In a one-horse open sleigh, hey!

Jingle bells, jingle bells jingle all the way Oh, what fun it is to ride In a one-horse open sleigh Dashing through the snow In a one-horse open sleigh O'er the fields we go Laughing all the way Bells on bobtails ring Making spirits bright What fun it is to laugh and sing A sleighing song tonight

(SCREAMS)

(PANTS) Mr. Bonkers...

If you boil me to death in my own shower, there'll be no one here to feed you.

(GASPS) What time is it?

(GASPS) I'm late!

(GRUNTS)

Bonkers, what happened to my dress?

GOTH GIRL: (SINGING) Jingle bells, jingle bells Jingle all the way Oh, what fun it is to ride In a one-horse open sleigh, hey!

Jingle bells, jingle bells

-Close your eyes. -Jingle all the way Oh, what fun it is to ride In a one-horse open sleigh

(SINGING) We wish you a merry Christmas We wish you a merry Christmas We wish you a merry Christmas And a happy New Year!

Good tidings we bring to you and your kin Good tidings for Christmas, and a happy New Year Come on!

(GASPS)

Ah! I still got time! I can still make it. (GRUNTS)

(SINGING) We three kings of Orient are

(CAR STARTING)

Bearing gifts, we traverse afar

Field and fountain, moor and mountain Following yonder star

-O star of wonder, star of night -Fa-la-la-la-la-la La-la-la-la-la La-la-la-la-la

-Westward leading, still proceeding -Fa-la-la-la-la-la

-Guide us to thy perfect light -La-la-la-la-la-la

(SIGHS IN RELIEF)

OLD LADY: (SINGING) Hark the herald angels sing Glory to the newborn king Peace on earth and mercy mild...

It's okay.

-(SIGHS) -(CAR ENGINE RUNNING)

(ENGINE STOPS)

With...

Thank you, Annette!

Wow, that was, uh... That was beautiful.

Yay.

(ALL APPLAUDING)

Great job, girls.

There is a lot of talent in this town.

(CLEARS THROAT) As you know, the Snow Belles have been the very definition of Christmas spirit in Ridgefield for over 40 years.

Becoming a Belle is a big deal.

Now, we have a very difficult decision to make.

So, to all of you, we wish you good luck.

And, most importantly...

(SINGING) We Wish you a merry Christmas And a happy new year

(ALL APPLAUDING)

You can go now.

-(CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY) -(DOOR OPENS)

(PANTS) Wait! Wait!

I'm so sorry I'm late.

My cat, my car, and that stupid snowplow.

I'm sorry. Please tell me I didn't miss the auditions.

Holly... Oh, sweetie, I would love to let you try out, but we only have the church till 8:30, so... (CHUCKLES)

But it's only 8:20.

(CLICKS TONGUE) Ooh, yeah. You just missed it.

I'm sure that's really disappointing.

Please, Marci, I've waited years for a spot to open up in the Snow Belles.

Now that Ingrid's gone...

-May she rest in peace... -(QUIETLY) Yeah.

I cannot miss this chance.

Marci, her mom founded the Snow Belles.

You have to let her try out.

Look, Marci, I have wanted this so bad.

It's all I ever think about. Look at this.

I designed new costumes.

I got new arrangements of classic carols.

I'm just asking for a chance, please.

I'm sorry. Maybe another spot will open up soon.

(WHISPERING) In fact, Barb's vocal cords are aging much faster than her face.

So fingers crossed. (CLICKS TONGUE)

(SIGHS WEARILY)

Oh, I'm dying for a gingerbread latte.

Let's go, girls.

(SINGING) O holy night The stars are brightly shining It is the night Of the dear Savior's birth Long lay the world In sin and error pining Till He appeared And the soul felt its worth A thrill of hope The weary world rejoices For yonder breaks A new and glorious morn Fall On your knees O hear The angels' voices O night Divine O night When Christ was born O night O night O night O night divine O night O night O night O night divine

(ALL APPLAUDING)

Wow.

Thanks for making that decision more difficult.

(BLOWS RASPBERRY)

Yeah. Okay.

Well, we're gonna go deliberate...

And caffeinate.

(SNAPS FINGERS) Let's go, girls.

(CHUCKLES)

(CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)

(CHUCKLES)

-Hi, Mike. -Hi, Holly.

Hi, guys.

-Hi. -Hi.

-Hi, Jessica! -Hi, Holly.

So, how'd it go?

-(TELEPHONE RINGING) -(PEOPLE CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)

You killed it. Come on, you killed it, right?

(CHUCKLES)

Oh, yeah! I told you you'd get it!

And can I be the first one to say, "Thank God"?

Because if I had to hear you talk about making the Snow Belles one more time...

AJ, I don't talk about it that much.

Really? Because every time you say "Snow Belle", (CLEARS THROAT) I add a paperclip, to this.

Wow. That is a huge waste of office supplies.

Yes, it is. Here, you should have it.

I haven't exactly made the Belles yet.

Ah. (CLEARS THROAT)

(CHUCKLES) Hey, don't worry about it.

You'll get it, because you have an amazing voice.

And because we're completely out of paperclips.

(BOTH CHUCKLE)

WOMAN: (SINGING) God rest ye merry, gentlemen Let nothing you dismay Remember Christ our savior Was born on Christmas day To save us all from Satan's power When we had gone astray O tidings of comfort and joy

-(MOUTHING) -Comfort and joy O tidings of comfort and joy

Ladies, I think we've found our girl.

Those in favor of Staci.

Oh, seriously?

Staci?

I mean, she's good.

She's a solid choice, but Holly was...

Late, for starters.

I mean, how hard is it to show up on time? (GASPS)

And that performance. (CHUCKLES) I mean, hello?

Um, Christina Aguilera called, and she...

She, well...

She wants that whole Christina Aguilera thing you ripped off back.

(LAUGHS)

We are not gonna have a diva in this group.

(LAUGHS)

Hmm. I'm sorry. Did I say something funny, Barb?

Well, I just think we should at least consider Holly.

Oh! We did. And we're picking Staci.

-Who's in favor? -Mmm-hmm.

I'll call Holly and tell her the bad news.

Unless any of you want to.

No? Great.

Listen, I know that it's the holidays, and the temptation is to just slack off and cruise into the new year.

But remember, we don't shut down until December 25, so I want 100% from everybody.

Yes, Larry.

We're still having a holiday party, right?

I'm gonna let H.R. handle this one.

-Bernie. -Yes.

The holiday party.

The good news is that we are having one.

(ALL CHEERING)

But the not-as-good-news is that it's going to be here in the lobby of the office.

-What? -ALL: No!

But corporate has assured me that this, uh, change of venue should result in, at most, a 9% reduction in employee enjoyment.

-(ALL GROANING) -So...

Happy holidays from headquarters! (SQUEAKS)

Nick, back to you.

Guys, let's not worry about the holiday party right now.

We need to finish strong.

Because there is no better gift this Christmas than the pride you'll feel when you tell your loved ones that Ridgefield International Resources had the most productive fiscal year in company history!

-(RING TONE PLAYING) -Hallelujah!

Um... I'm just so inspired, you know?

Ready to get back to work. Let's go, team!

MARCI: (OVER CELL PHONE) Are you there? Um, hello?

-Hello? -Hi, Holly. It's Marci.

-Oh, hi, Marci. -Is this a bad time?

No, no, this isn't a bad time at all.

-Oh, great. -(TURNS SPEAKER ON)

So we made our decision.

(INHALES) Well, I have to admit, I've been obsessing about this since this morning.

Well, then I won't keep you waiting a minute longer.

We all talked, and, well, Holly...

You're just not Snow Belle material.

(PEOPLE CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)

But listen, your performance, it was... (GASPS)

Oh, just adorable. (LAUGHS)

You're just the cutest little thing!

So, you know, keep on singin', you. (CHUCKLES)

-Merry Christmas. -(PHONE BEEPS)

Merry Christmas.

(PHONE BEEPS)

I hope that's not a personal call.

What?

-Oh, no. It was just, um... -Good.

Listen, Holly...

I know you think I take office productivity very seriously,

but it kind of felt like you were mocking me.

I can't be humiliated in front of my team.

We understand each other?

Sure, Nick.

Great.

That's... That's cute. (CHUCKLES)

Let's get those paperclips back in the supply room by the end of the day, huh? (CHUCKLES)

Hey, whatcha doin'?

(HUFFS)

(SNICKERS) Come on, it's kind of funny.

This is all your fault.

Exactly. That is what makes it so funny.

Okay, I'm sorry.

-Hey, you want some help? -Nope, I'm almost done.

Good, because the girls from accounting are going out for drinks, and I was gonna go join them.

-They invited you -No.

I'll see you.

(KEYBOARD CLACKING)

Oh, Holly. You got a second?

Sure. What's up?

Would you mind taking that down?

It's not really appropriate above the boss's door.

Oh, and, Holly?

-Yeah? -Could you close the door, too, please?

Thanks.

Jerk.

-(BOYS SCREAMING ALTERNATIVELY) -(GRINDER RUNNING)

(SCREAMING CONTINUES)

(SCREAMING ALTERNATIVELY)

Boys, boys!

I don't understand this game.

What are the rules?

I don't know.

(SCREAMING ALTERNATIVELY)

How can you think with all of this noise?

What noise?

(SCREAMING CONTINUES)

Honestly, I don't even hear it anymore.

I just kind of tune it out.

Ed, restart the DVD!

Staying for dinner?

It's healthier than it looks.

Boys would puke if they knew they were eating veggies.

Well, this is my dinner.

-Holly! -Grace!

First of all, Marci is a frigid biatch, and second of all, if you want to go Christmas caroling so bad, we'll go with you.

Yeah. Me, dad, Gary, I'll force the kids.

They'll hate it. It'll be great!

I don't want to go Christmas caroling.

I want to be a Snow Belle.

I want to perform at the mall Christmas Eve.

Just like Mom did.

I know, it sounds stupid.

It's not stupid, sweetie.

Boys! Food!

You know what? Forget about the Snow Belles.

Why don't you start your own group?

You can't just start your own group.

Why not? Mom did.

Don't! Don't put your hand anywhere near their mouths when they are eating.

You will lose a finger.

(SIGHS)


(SCOFFS) Stupid Snow Belles.

I should start my own group.

Even if I did, it's not like they'd let us perform at the mall, anyway.

(CAR HONKING)

Excuse me. Who's in charge of the mall?

MALL MANAGER: (IMITATING SANTA) Merry Christmas!

Santa? I need to ask you a question about Christmas Eve.

(IMITATING SANTA) Ho Ho Ho! Uh...

What do you want for Christmas, young lady?

I know you're not Santa Claus.

Ha! Good.

You kind of threw me there for a second.

I mean, I figured you were a little old, but it's a mall, right?

The place is full of wackos.

What can I do you for?

I don't know.

I mean, every year it's the Snow Belles.

It's just the way it is.

Yeah, but theoretically, can't another group audition for the Christmas Eve show?

Speaking strictly theoretically?

Beats me. But I already got the Snow Belles on the sign out front, so...

(SIGHS)

-You know? -Yeah, I know.

Well, I mean it is just a sign out front.

I could have my guy Carl change that thing in, like, five minutes.

Yeah! Sure! You know what we could do?

We could have tryouts like that American Idol!

-Really? -Why not?

I'm the manager. I can shake things up if I want.

-(EXHALES) -We could make it this really big thing a week from Saturday...

Anybody who wants to gets a chance.

And the best group will perform Christmas Eve.

How's that sound?

(CHUCKLES)

Wait. I don't have a group yet.

We were just speaking theoretically.

Lady, we are way past that.

I already got Carl out front changing the sign.

This is gonna be awesome.

MARCI: That tone-deaf skank! (GASPS)

Christmas Eve is our night.

And, what, now we have to compete for it?

It's unjust is what it is.

The Snow Belles have always performed at the Deck the Mall Christmas Spectacular. (SCOFFS)

We're the only spectacular thing about it!

I told you we should've picked Holly.

(SCOFFS) Barb! Please!

Now, if Holly thinks that she is gonna steal this from us, well, she...

She...

She is peppermint-barking up the wrong tree.

(LAUGHS)

Oh, that's good!

Peppermint-barking? (IMITATES DOG BARKING)

Thanks, Staci. (SCOFFS)

But don't worry, girls. Because, as usual, I will fix this.

Because no one...

No one screws with my Snow Belles.

AJ: Wow. Remind me never to get on your bad side.

I didn't do this for revenge.

It was just kind of an accident.

Right. The Belles don't pick you, so you "accidentally" open up the Christmas Spectacular to every "Fa-la-la-ing" fruitcake in town.

Okay, so what do I do?

Hey, you started this.

You're gonna have to put a group together.

(SIGHS)

Okay, okay. I'll be in your group.

But you just called us "Fa-la-la-la-ing fruitcakes".

Yeah. But the ladies totally dig musicians.

Can you even sing?

Do you even have a choice?

All right. So we have you and me. Now what?

MAN: (SINGING) O little town of Bethlehem How still we see thee lie

(VOCALIZING)

What?

So tell Santa what you want for Christmas, sweetheart.

Oh, crap!

-What the hell, Mike? -Marci!

Hey! What brings you out to the mall?

Oh, you know damn well what I'm doing here!

What? I thought it would be fun to try something new.

-They say variety is the spice of life... -Shut up!

You are gonna call off these auditions and put the Snow Belles back on that marquee!

Sorry, Marci, but I couldn't do it even if I wanted to.

Word is out!

I had three groups sign up just this morning!

-(GASPS) -Wouldn't be fair to them.

Fair? You want to know what's fair?

You son of a...

(MOUTHING)

(SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)

...kill you!

I'm sorry you feel that way.

Yeah, you will be sorry.

Boo!

Fine, we'll beat everyone anyway!

What do you think? Naughty list?

Psst!

Trust me. You gotta hear this girl.

Bernie from H.R.?

I don't know about this, guys. H.R. people weird me out.

It's always like they're trying to catch you doing something skeezy.

Then don't do anything skeezy.

Hey, Bernie.

Hey, Larry, Holly.

I did not just look down your shirt.

Glad to hear it.

What can I do for you guys?

AJ: God, it is like a day spa in here.

As a representative of H.R., I have to say that this is highly inappropriate.

Yeah, this is a little weird.

Come on, Bernie! Belt one out!

Show them what you can do!

You guys are making me nervous, all staring at me like that.

(SIGHS)

Here.

Just go inside, shut the door, and let it rip.

(CHUCKLES)

This feels wrong!

Just go for it!

I tell you, she's got the voice of an angel.

(SINGING) Deck the...

Wait for it, wait for it.

The halls With boughs of holly Fa-la-la-la-la La-la-la-la

'Tis the season to be jolly Fa-la-la-la-la La-la-la-la Don we now our gay apparel Fa-la-la-la-la La-la-la Troll the ancient yuletide carol Fa-la-la-la-la La-la-la-la

-(CHUCKLES) -Wow!

-Told ya. -So, is somebody gonna tell me why I'm caroling in the crapper?

Good night, Holly.

Good night, sir.

Hey, you know we don't pay overtime, right?

Yep. We're all very aware of that.

Yeah. Well, don't stay too late, okay?

Larry, did you get the keys?

Let's do this.

Trust me, this is the perfect place to rehearse.

Everyone knocks off at 5:00, and it is totally soundproof.

You could murder someone in here and no one would hear them scream.

Well, I've never murdered anyone in here.

I've never murdered anyone anywhere.

Oh, God. Can we just start already?

All right, let's start with something simple.

(SINGING) On the first day of Christmas my true love sent to me A partridge in a pear tree On the second day of Christmas my true love sent to me Two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree

-Again! -On the third day of Christmas My true love sent to me Three french hens, two turtle doves And a partridge in a pear tree On the fourth day of Christmas My true love sent to me Four calling birds, three French hens two turtle doves And a partridge in a pear tree

-Yeah! -(ALL LAUGHING)

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love sent to me Five, five golden rings four calling birds Three french hens, two turtle doves And a partridge in a pear tree On the sixth day of Christmas my true love sent to me Six geese a-laying five, five golden rings

-Four calling birds, three french hens -Two turtle doves And a partridge in a pear tree On the seventh day of Christmas My true love sent to me Seven swans a-swimming six geese a-laying Five, five golden rings Four calling birds, three french hens two turtle doves And a partridge in a pear tree

(CRASHES)

Yeah, yeah, yeah On the eight day of Christmas my true love sent to me Eight maids a-milking seven swans a-swimming Six geese a-laying five, five golden rings Four calling birds three french hens, two turtle doves And a partridge in a pear tree On the ninth day of Christmas my true love sent to me, yeah Nine ladies dancing eight maids a-milking Seven swans a-swimming six geese a-laying Five, five, golden rings Four calling birds, three french hens two turtle doves And a partridge in a pear tree On the tenth day of Christmas my true love sent to me Ten lords a-leaping nine ladies dancing Eight maids a-milking seven swans a-swimming Six geese a-laying five, five golden rings Four calling birds three french hens, two turtle doves And a partridge in a pear tree On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love sent to me Eleven pipers piping, ten lords a-leaping Nine ladies dancing, eight maids a-milking Seven swans a-swimming six geese a-laying Five, five golden rings Four calling birds, three french hens Two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love sent to me, yeah Twelve drummers drumming Eleven pipers piping, ten lords a-leaping Nine ladies dancing, eight maids a-milking Seven swans a-swimming, six geese a-laying Five, five golden rings Four calling birds, three french hens Two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree Oh, yeah Twelve days of Christmas Oh, yeah

(ALL PANTING)

That was better.

-That was perfect... -(GIGGLES)

If you were trying to sound like a dying moose, Barb.

(GASPS)

Now do it again, from the top.

(CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY AND LAUGHING)

-All right, bye. -Bye, guys.

-See you guys later. -Have a good night.

Hey, so we were seriously on point tonight, right?

(SCOFFS) Are you kidding me?

What are you talking about? You said we're getting better.

The Snow Belles have been doing this for years.

They're like caroling robots.

They're gonna destroy us.

Man, you're a serious buzz-kill.

-We're missing something. -Like what?

I don't know. We need better moves or something.

It needs to be more like a...

Like a show.

We got a week to figure it out.

-I'll see you, Holly. -Okay, bye.

(SIGHS)

We are so screwed.

RADIO JOCKEY: Winter storm warning. Icy roads still in effect.

And here's a word from our sponsor.

MALL MANAGER: Hey, folks, it's Mike from the Linden Grove Mall, reminding you to sign up for the Deck the Mall auditions.

Who knows? You could be caroling on our stage Christmas Eve!

Ugh. Please kill me now.

-See you guys! -(SCREAMS)

I don't want to die! I don't want to die!

I don't want to die! (SCREAMS)

(PANTING)

-(ENGINE FAILS) -(SIGHS)

(GRUNTS)

(SIGHS)

Hi. Yeah. Um...

My car is stuck in the snow on Main Street, just past Overlook.

Okay, how long is that gonna be?

(SIGHS)

Yes, I know that there's a winter storm warning.

Fine. Just get here when you can.

Thanks.

(PEOPLE CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)

(SINGING) Just me and you and me

(ALL APPLAUDING)

Wow! That was really, really bad.

Can I have a glass of white wine?

Up next, it's the king of karaoke, -and he's here to rock the mic! -(CROWD CHEERING)

Give it up, Dickens Tavern!

(CROWD CLAPPING)

(MAN SINGING ROCK SONG)

(CROWD CHEERING)

Oh. My. God!


(CONTINUES SINGING)


(CROWD CHEERING)

Thank you!

KARAOKE MC: Yeah! St. Nick is in the house!

I pity the fool that has to follow that.

Wow. That was impressive.

Ah, I was just having fun, you know? Doing my thing.

Glad you dug it.

I mean, I would not have believed that if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes.

-What are you doing here? -Nick, you were amazing!

You cannot tell anyone at work about this.

Look, you should not be embarrassed, okay?

-I mean. You were great. -No one at work can know!

Do you realize what this would do for you around the office?

People would actually like you!

People like me.

You know what? I'm... I'm the boss, okay?

My job isn't to be liked.

It's to make sure that the work gets done.

Absolutely.

You're right.

So do you do this a lot?

(SCOFFS)

Every Friday night.

You had the crowd in the palm of your hands.

You were unbelievable!

Gotta give the people a show.

Right.

You know, a lot of people think it's just about getting up there and hitting the notes, but there is so much more to it.

There's stagecraft, there's choreography.

Everybody in the audience has to feel like you are singing directly to them.

Exactly.

Holly, are you okay?

We need your help.

We? Who's we?

(HOLLY SCOFFS)

Please, Nick. I can only take the group so far.

We just need a little bit of what you've got.

It's the only way we can beat the Snow Belles.

Forget it. I want no part of this.

If you could just teach us to do what you do...

Holly, this conversation is over.

As far as I'm concerned, I never saw you, you never saw me.

This never happened. And you know what?

I don't want you guys using the warehouse anymore.

You're slacking off as it is.

Oh, yeah. I noticed.

Oh, yeah? Then I guess I'll have to tell everybody about St. Nick.

The king of karaoke.

Go ahead. Nobody would believe you.

Really?

Well, the internet was invented for this.

Come next Friday, the entire office will be down here.

You wouldn't dare.

Warehouse, tomorrow, 2:30, or this goes viral at 3:00.

(CAR STARTING)

(HORN HONKING)

(SINGING) He rules the world with truth and grace And makes the nations prove The glories of His righteousness And wonders of his love and wonders of his love And wonders and wonders of his love

Oh, man! What is he doing here?

It's Saturday. He can't fire us on Saturday. Can he?

What's the company policy in a situation like this?

We're in a bit of a gray area here.

-Guys, calm down. I invited him. -You what?

Look, if we're gonna have a chance at beating the Snow Belles, we need help.

And Nick has serious skills.

-He does? You do? -How do you know this?

I can't tell you that, but trust me, we need him.

I wasn't sure you were gonna come.

Well, I didn't really have a choice, did I?

No, I guess you didn't.

So, this is the group?

What do you call yourselves? You have a name?

Sir, I'm Larry from Purchasing.

I know your name, Larry.

I'm talking about the group. What do you call the group?

Well, we're sort of still working on that.

-You don't have a name? -Mmm-mmm.

(CHUCKLES) Okay, all right. We'll get to that later.

-(SING-SONGY) I am sensing some hostility. -(SING-SONGY) True that.

Guys, he's here to help us.

What do you think? How do we sound?

-Okay! Well, at least you can sing. -Yeah!

Not you so much, but the rest of you aren't bad.

I mean, they're not good.

Okay.

Look, you're just not working as a team.

You need to think of your voices as keys on a piano.

Separately, you make sounds, but together, you make music.

Damn! That's deep, son.

Now, you guys, you have potential, but what you don't have is time.

So if I'm gonna help you, you need to do exactly as I say.

Check.

Also, I am only helping you. I am not part of your group.

-Chiggity-check. -Don't do that.

-Sorry. -No one can know about this.

No one. Clear?

-Word. -Crystal clear.

BERNIE: Got it.

(CLEARS THROAT) Okay.

Let's take it from the top.

(MUSIC PLAYING)

Joy to the world The Lord is come Drop your jaw.

Let earth receive Her King

-Oh, yeah -Nice.

Let every heart

-Prepare him room -Stand up straight!

Oh, sorry.

And heaven and nature sing Come on, Bernie, sell it, sell it.

Ooh, yeah And heaven, and heaven And nature sing

(INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)

Joy to the world Good.

The savior reigns

-Let men -Let men

-Their songs -Their songs

-Employ -Pick your feet up.

Oh, oh, oh While fields and floods Rocks, hills, and plains Keep the energy up.

Repeat the sounding joy

-Repeat the sounding joy -Repeat, oh, yeah Good, nice.

Repeat, repeat The sounding joy Good, all right!

(GRUNTS)

(GROANS)

(GRUNTS)

(GASPS) Sorry.

(GASPS) Wow, perfect.

No more let sins

-And sorrows grow -Oh, yeah

-Nor thorns -Nor thorns

-Infest -Infest

-The ground -The ground He comes to make His blessings flow

-Far as the curse is found -Far as the curse is found

-Far as the curse is found -Is found Far as Far as The curse is found Ooh, ooh

Ooh, yeah

I'm just... Just stretching.

He rules the world With truth and grace

-And makes -And makes

-The nations -The nations Prove Makes the nations prove The glories of

-His righteousness -Righteousness

-And wonders of his love -Wonders of his love

-And wonders of his love -Oh, oh, oh And wonders Wonders

-Of His love -Of His love Love

-Oh, yeah -Love Oh, love

(PANTING)

(SIGHS)

Well, that wasn't totally excruciating.

But we still have a lot of work to do.

I think it's great. (CHUCKLES)

All right, guys, that's enough for tonight. Who wants a drink?

-I do. -Ooh.

Okay.

So, are you coming?

-I have work to do. -It's 8:30.

You're going back to the office?

The time that I waste here in the warehouse has to be made up somehow, doesn't it?

Unless, of course, you would like to delete that video.

Are you kidding me? Because of you, I'm starting to believe we have a chance.

Come on, just have one drink with us.

-No, thanks. -(SIGHS)

Man, you really need to get a life.

-Oh, really? -Mmm-hmm.

Says the girl who blackmailed her boss so that her caroling group can sing in a mall.

All right. Well, if you change your mind, -we'll be at Deacon's Tavern. -(CHUCKLES)

You do know where that is, right?

-Ha ha. Very funny. -(GIGGLES)

All right, bye.

Good night, Holly.

(CHUCKLES)

Ow!

BERNIE: I drive by this place every day, but it never occurred to me to actually come inside.

I always though it was full of day drinkers and people with mullets.

MAN 1: Whoo! MAN 2: Yee-haw!

-And I was not wrong. -(LAUGHS)

Listen, guys, I want to thank you for working so hard on this.

I mean, I couldn't have done it without you.

Are you kidding me? I'm still riding high from tonight's practice. I'm having the best time.

My wife can't wait to see us perform.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! You have a wife?

Yeah, Theresa.

She married me for my body.

(CHUCKLES)

Not this body.

The one I had when we got married.

-Oh. -(LAUGHS)

-(SNORTS) Oh! -(LAUGHS)

I'm glad you asked me, too, Holly.

I haven't really had a whole lot to do after work since I beat Red Horizon 2.

Yeah. You beat Red Horizon 2.

Mmm-hmm, twice.

Whoa. That is hot.

That is inappropriate.

But I'm okay with it.

Well, I'm glad we're in this together.

So here's to... Whatever we're called.

(SIGHS)

Nick's right. We need a name.

I got it. Holidazed and Confused.

-Ha! -No.

Ooh, I got one! The Snow Tunes.

Sounds kind of like show tunes, but it's Snow Tunes.

-Right. -That's okay.

We need something cool, something that rocks.

Yes, yes!

Sled Zeppelin.

-Clever. -Hmm, not quite.

The Backstreet Goys.

Okay, that's just stupid.

And I'm Jewish.

I did not know that.

Guys, the Snow Belles have been doing this forever.

We need a name that screams holiday tradition.

We have until Friday to sign up, so, clearly, we can think of something by then.

Oh! Oh!

Oh, I got nothin'.

-Hey, Bonkers. -(MEOWS)

(SIGHS)

How hard is it to come up with a freaking name?

Ah.

That's it.

(WHISPERS) Bye, Bonkers.

(LAUGHING)

Listen, babe, if you want to audition, you gotta come down here and sign up in person, just like everybody else.

WOMAN: (ON PHONE) Come on.

(LAUGHS)

Yeah. I got somebody else in my office. I gotta jump.

(LAUGHS)

So, what can I do for you, babe?

Uh...

Hey. It's you!

Yeah, it's me.

(LAUGHS) Lady, I got to admit, I thought you were nuts for taking on the Snow Belles, but this is the best thing that's happened since we put stuff on a stick in the food court.

(LAUGHS) Foot traffic's up 60%, and we've still got two weeks till Christmas!

And I owe it all to you.

I came here to sign up for the auditions.

Yeah. Sure.

Here's the list.

Wow. That's a lot of groups.

No.

That's a lot of groups.

Just sign at the bottom.

(SIGHS)

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS)

How awful are they?

Not awful enough.

Hmm? Please. They're, like, a group of rejects.

And that Holly girl... Yeah, she's not so great.

Oh, please. Don't be an idiot, Staci.

Holly was easily the best singer to try out for the Belles.

-Well, then why did you... -Because the Snow Belles are my group.

And I'm not gonna let some diva come in here and take this all away from me.

Besides, I didn't know that little door mouse was gonna start a war over it.

But make no mistake, Staci, Holly has talent and a grudge.

She's dangerous.

So what are you gonna do?

Oh. (CHUCKLES)

I'm gonna give her what she wants.

(GASPS) Oh. Christmas cookies.

Ah! You know, to wear a Snow Belles costume, you actually have to fit into a Snow Belles costume.

(CHUCKLES)

AJ: You called us the Mistle-Tones?

That's stupider than any of the ideas we came up with.

-I like it. -Me, too.

Works for me.

You know, it's kind of growing on me.

(CLAPS)

(ENGINE SPLUTTERING)

No.

(SIGHS)

(SIGHING IN EXHAUSTION)

(SIGHS WEARILY)

JIM: Nick, next time this year, you'll be running an entire division.

Sounds good to me, Jim.

JIM: You know what sounds good? The engines on a corporate G-5 as you leave Ridgeburg for good.

-Ridgefield. -JIM: Whatever.

If you deliver the quarterly numbers you're on track to deliver, you're golden.

I'll catch you later.

So, who said you could stop working?

(CHUCKLES) Holly.

My car won't start.

I just came inside to call a cab.

Oh, that's fine. I can give you a ride.

Oh, no, no, you don't have to.

No, it's fine.

I'm done for the night, anyway.

Okay. Well, if it's not too much trouble.

No, it's no trouble at all.

Let me just get my stuff.

-You ready? -Yeah. Sure, let's go.

(SEAT SQUEAKING)

(CHUCKLES)

So, everybody was looking pretty good today.

Larry hit all his marks.

Bernie seems like she's having fun.

And AJ is... He's not singing through his nose.

(BOTH CHUCKLE)

I'd say the Mistle-Tones have a decent shot on Saturday.

You know, you could've told them that.

Yeah, that's not really my management style.

I've noticed.

Hey, I get results.

That's why you're forcing me to do this, right?

No, I'm forcing you to do this because under that corporate robot exterior beats the heart of a rock star.

(LAUGHING) Come on.

No, I'm serious.

That guy on stage is amazing.

You should try being him a little more often.

He's fun.

I was that guy, Holly, for a long time.

And then I grew up.

-Boo. -Oh, God.

-(LAUGHING) -I'm sorry, but not all of our lives can be made complete by singing in a shopping mall Christmas show.

Oh, yeah.

And a wall full of corporate "Way to go" plaques is so much more meaningful.

Hey, I worked very hard for those "Way to go" plaques.

Work isn't the same as passion.

When you find something that makes you happy, you can't give up on it, no matter what.

Look, let's just agree that we both want different things.

Fine.

But your thing's stupider than mine. (GIGGLES)

HOLLY: Uh, that's me.

The one with all the lights.

NICK: Yeah, I figured.

So, let's say you get your wish, you beat the Snow Belles, the Mistle-Tones perform on Christmas Eve.

What are you gonna open with?

I don't know.

But I do know what I'm gonna close with.

When my mom was a Snow Belle, they closed with the same song every year.

(SINGING HOLIDAY SONG)


(SINGING ALONG)

It's perfect.

Well, thanks for the ride.

No problem.

(CHUCKLES) Good night.

Holly.

Don't forget, the holiday party's tomorrow.

I don't know why I just told you that. (CHUCKLES)

Well, I appreciate the reminder. (GIGGLES)

-Good night... Again. -Good night.

(ENGINE STARTS)

MARCI: It's about time you got home.

Marci?

So, tell me everything. Was that your boyfriend?

Uh, what are you doing here?

Holly, I think we got off on the wrong foot.

I just want you to know that, honestly, I don't blame you for starting this whole mess.

So I've been thinking...

Working against each other doesn't do anyone any good.

But if we joined together, then none of those groups could even hold a candle to us.

What are you talking about?

In the spirit of Christmas, I have decided to make room for a sixth Snow Belle.

So, Holly, congratulations.

You're in. (SHRIEKS)

Oh! You're a Belle!

Just like your mom.

-(SIGHS) -Oh, I know.

This is so overwhelming for you.

Yes, right, okay. You know what?

You take the night, let it sink in, then meet us at the church first thing Monday morning, 'cause we have a lot of work to do.

Let's bounce, Vixen.

Bye! (GIGGLES)

But...

(PEOPLE LAUGHING)

BERNIE: Attention, everybody!

Happy holidays!

Please drink responsibly.

Whoa.

(SIGHS) Guys, this is the lamest holiday party ever, isn't it?

No, it's just...

Yeah, it's pretty lame.

Don't worry. I can fix this.

Not that lame, though.

Like, only 9% lamer than last year.

Just like the report said.

Thank you.

Hey.

You're missing a really pathetic holiday party out there.

Here you go.

-Thank you. -Mmm-hmm.

Oh, wow. (CHUCKLES)

Merry Christmas.

Do you think the Mistle-Tones have a chance of winning this contest?

Well...

You've only had, like, a week and a half to practice, so...

I'll take that as a "no".

I didn't say no.

But you didn't say yes.

Okay.

Holly, what's this really about?

All right. Marci came by the house last night, and she asked me to join the Snow Belles.

-Seriously? -Yeah, it was weird.

She just showed up and said I was in.

Hmm.

So are you gonna do it?

I don't know. I mean, if I join the Snow Belles, I'm practically guaranteed a chance to sing on Christmas Eve.

The Tones are fun, but you said it yourself, we don't have a chance.

Okay, then you have a choice to make.

Do you take a risk, or do you go with the sure thing?

What would you do?

You'd take the sure thing.

This is your decision, Holly.

Why didn't she just let me in when I tried out?

Sometimes the opportunities that we want don't always come exactly when we want them to.

(CHUCKLES) What are you doing?

Thank you for your help.

I guess I'd better go tell the guys.

Mmm. Wow.

That's awful.

Whoa, coming through. (CHUCKLES)

Always keep this baby in the car in case of emergency.

-Check one, two, one to the two. -(MICROPHONE FEEDBACK)

All right, Ridgefield International Resources, if you down for a little karaoke, make some noise!

-Yay! -(CLAPPING)

Ridgefield, if you down for a little karaoke, make some noise!

-Yay! Whoo! -Yay!

Yay... Okay.

Okay, you know what? I'm just gonna leave this on.

Use it, don't use it, see if I care.

I tried.

Thank you.

Hey, guys. I need to talk to you.

-What's up? -What's going on?

It's about the audition tomorrow.

NICK: Everybody, can I have your attention, please?

There's something I need to share with you.

(MUSIC PLAYING)

(SINGING CHRISTMAS MUSIC)

(SINGING ALONG)


(SINGING CONTINUES)


(CROWD CHEERING)

Yo, give it up for the boss-man!

Whoo! Yeah!

You can't leave the Mistle-Tones.

Screw the Belles. The tones is your group.

Win or lose, you're in this together.

What?

What? Say something.

If the Mistle-Tones are gonna win, we need you to help us.

I am helping.

No, I mean, we need you to sing with us.

Come on, Nick, you just outed yourself in front of the entire office.

Singing at the mall would be a walk in the park.

I wouldn't miss it for the world.

(CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)

So, I'll see you tomorrow?

Absolutely.

Okay.

Nick. I'm going to need you and Holly to stop by my cube on Monday because there are some boss-employee make-out forms I need you to fill out.

Shut up. (CHUCKLES)

(CHUCKLES)

(PHONE RINGING)

-This is Nick. -JIM: Hey, buddy, it's Jim.

Glad you're still there.

What am I talking about? Of course, you're still there.

You're a workaholic.

-What's up? -Got some great news, man.

Marty Schuster, our Southeast Asia guy, lost it.

Like, total nervous breakdown.

That doesn't sound so great.

Not for Marty, but it is for you.

Buddy, I'm giving you the keys to Southeast Asia.

-What? -That's right, pal.

Looks like you're getting your promotion a few weeks early.

Merry friggin' Christmas. Just one more thing.

You need to get on a plane tonight.

We need boots on the ground, ASAP.

When the boys upstairs asked me who we could send halfway around the world this close to Christmas, I was, like, "Nick's our guy. He works 24-7, no family."

You were made for this moment, brother.

Congrats. Call me when you touch down in Mumbai.

Hey, Marci. It's Holly.

Um, look, I thought about your offer, and, well...

I'm not Snow Belle material.

But, listen, good luck tomorrow.

You guys are adorable! Merry Christmas!

(CELL PHONE BEEPING)

Staci? Assemble the Snow Belles right now.

We are having an emergency rehearsal.

Because I said so!

Okay?

(CROWD CHEERING)

Welcome to the fight before Christmas!

The ultimate caroling battle royale!

(CROWD CHEERING)

Twenty groups facing off to be the official musical act of Deck The Mall Christmas Eve Spectacular!

(CROWD APPLAUDING)

First up, it's the Chest-Notes!

(CROWD CHEERING)

(HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING)

Whoo, uh You gotta deck them halls Hey! Come on!

You gotta deck them halls Deck the halls with boughs of holy Fa-la-la-la-la la-la-la-la

'Tis the season to be jolly Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la

-Don we now our gay apparel -Come on!

Fa-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la Troll the ancient Yuletide carol Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la Hey, sorry we're late.

Hey, guys. No worries. We don't go on for a while.

Where's Nick?

He'll be here.

MALL MANAGER: All right, everybody.

This next fella's gonna put the hip-hop in your holiday.

-It's Ludakris Kringle! -(CROWD CHEERING)

Away in a manger no crib for his bed Little Lord Jesus laid down his sweet head The stars in the bright sky looked down where he lay Little Lord Jesus was asleep on the hay The cattle are lowing The poor baby wakes But little Lord Jesus no crying he makes I love thee, Lord Jesus look down from the sky Stay by my side till morning is night Away in a manger No crib from his bed Little Lord Jesus Little Lord Jesus laid down his sweet head

VOICEMAIL: Hi, this is Nick Anderson.

Leave a message and I'll get back to you.

Hey, Nick, it's me, Holly.

Uh, we're at the mall, and I'm just wondering where you are.

Please call me back. Thanks. Bye.

-Hey! You made it! -(LAUGHS)

Of course, we did. We wouldn't miss this.

You don't have to be nervous. You're gonna be just great.

Hmm. Thanks for coming.

MALL MANAGER: Ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together for the Tinsel Tweens!

(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

O' Christmas tree O' Christmas tree Thy leaves are so unchanging O' Christmas tree, O' Christmas tree Thy leaves are so unchanging Not only green when summer's here But also when 'tis cold and drear O' Christmas tree, O' Christmas tree Thy leaves are so unchanging Thy leaves are so unchanging

-O' Christmas -Thy leaves are so unchanging

(CROWD APPLAUDING)

Ladies and gentlemen, the Tinsel Tweens!

Let 'em hear it!

Great job, ladies. Yo, yo, that was awesome!

(SCOFFS)

Those little monsters just threatened me.

HOLLY: Hey, guys.

I guess Nick's not coming.

So what? We don't... We don't need him.

Yeah, we can do this. I'll sing his part.

I guess so.

It's now or never.

All right, let's do this.

Mistle-Tones.

Put your hands together for the Mistle-Tones!

(CROWD CLAPPING)

-(CHRISTMAS SONG PLAYING) -(ALL CLAPPING)

(MISTLE-TONES SINGING)


(CROWD APPLAUDING)

Whoo! Whoo!

Oh, Lar-bear, you did so good!

-(KISSES) -(LAUGHS)

Well, it wasn't our best performance.

Don't worry, Larry. We were great.

Yeah, who cares what happens. Yo, that was awesome. Right?

-The Mistle-Tones, everybody! -(GRUNTS)

Let 'em hear it!

(CROWD CHEERING)

You were fantastic! I am so proud of you!

-Oh, thank you. -You were great.

-Thank you. -Really great.

Our last group needs no introduction.

They've been bringing the Christmas spirit for the last 30 years.

Ladies and gentlemen, the Snow Belles!

(CROWD CHEERING)

(VOCALIZING)

I don't want a lot for Christmas There is just one thing I need I don't care about the presents Underneath the Christmas tree I don't need to hang that stocking

-There upon the fireplace -Wow.

Santa Claus won't make me happy With a toy on Christmas day I just want you for my own More than you could ever know Make my wish come true Baby, all I want for Christmas is you You, you, you You, baby Though all the lights are shining So brightly everywhere And the sound of children's laughter fills the air Everyone is singing I hear the sleigh bells ringing Santa, won't you bring me the one I really need?

Won't you please bring my baby to me?

I don't want a lot for Christmas This is all I'm asking for I just want to see my baby Standing right outside my door I just want you for my own More than you could ever know Make my wish come true Baby, all I want for Christmas Is you You, baby All I want for Christmas Is you, baby All I want for Christmas Is you, baby All I want for Christmas Is you, baby You, you, you All I want for Christmas Is you

(ALL APPLAUDING)

MARCI: Thank you. Thank you so much.

We love you, too.

Well, I guess that's it.

Want to hit the arcade?

Sure.

(CHUCKLES)

-We'll see you guys on Monday. -Okay.

Bye, Holly.

Bye.


I'm gonna go check on the kids.

Phew.

Why don't you have a chat with the old man?

Come on.

You know, your mother would've been real proud of you today.

I doubt that.

She would've been up there with the Snow Belles, bringing the house down.

Do you know why your mom started the Snow Belles?

It was so that she and her friends could have a good time singing Christmas songs.

It wasn't about the applause or winning contests.

It was about having fun.

But do you know what her favorite part was?

The last song of the Christmas Eve show, she'd take you up in her arms, walk out on stage, and all of those people were watching, but she was singing right to you.

That's all I remember of her. (SNIFFLES)

And she'd be okay with that.

It's what mattered to her.

I love you, Holly.

I love you, too.

(CELL PHONE RINGING)

(SIGHS)

(CLICKS TONGUE) It's a little late, Nick.

(CHUCKLES) See what he has to say.

Hello?

NICK: Holly, I am so sorry.

I have been on a plane since last night.

I... I don't know what to say.

You don't need to say anything, Nick.

They gave me the promotion.

I've been working really hard for this.

Congratulations.

I really hope that you get everything you want.

-Holly... -Goodbye, Nick.

(WOMAN SINGING CHRISTMAS SONG ON TV)


(CHRISTMAS CAROL MUSIC PLAYING)

(DOORBELL RINGING)

-(MEOWS) -Bonkers!

-(DOORBELL RINGING) -Coming!

I can't believe you're making me do this.

Oh, come on. This is a tradition.

(SIGHS)

(ENGINE STARTS)

HOLLY: Hi.

I'll meet you guys in a second.

You okay?

-You all right? -Yeah.

-You sure. -Mmm-hmm.

Okay.

Oh. Poinsettias for Christmas.

Looks like someone stopped at a supermarket.

Can I come in?

Sweetie! (CHUCKLES) Oh...

I'm sorry. This dressing room is for performers only.

Which you aren't.

I just wanted to say...

Say what? That you're sorry for causing this whole Carol-off situation?

Or are you sorry that you didn't take my offer to become a Belle?

Or are you just plain sorry you lost?

I just wanted to say Merry Christmas.

What's that supposed to mean?

Have a great show.

You... You don't tell me what to do!

(ALL APPLAUDING)

Welcome to the Deck the Mall Christmas Eve Spectacular!

(ALL APPLAUDING)

Featuring the Snow Belles!

(APPLAUDING)


(PEOPLE CHEERING IN DISTANCE)

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

(GROUP SINGING)

What is he doing?

(SINGING)

(CROWD WHISTLING)

Come and sing with me.

-Forget it. -Please.

Holly, go on and sing with the guy.

I'm not going up there.

Who wants to hear Holly sing?

(ALL APPLAUDING)

What are you doing here?

I turned the promotion down.

It was what I thought I always wanted, but when I got there, I realized I didn't want it anymore.

I wanted you.

Somebody once told me that when you find something that makes you happy, you can't give up on it, no matter what.

I'm gonna make you work for this.

(CHUCKLES) That's fine. I'm a workaholic.

(CHUCKLES)

Please come and sing with me.

(CROWD CHEERING)

(ALL APPLAUDING)

(NICK SINGING)

(BOTH SINGING)


What is this? This is not part of the Christmas Eve Spectacular!

Maybe it is now.

Wait. Where are you going?

I am your leader, and we can't support this!

Marci, come on. It looks like fun.

Staci, if you go over there, your off-key ass is out of the Belles! Forever!

Marci, lighten up. It's Christmas.

Wha... You...

(SINGING CONTINUES)


(ALL CHEERING)

(MUSIC PLAYING)