The Woman Next Door (1981) Script

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It was still dark when the squad car left Grenoble The village is 15 miles away The ambulance is probably already there for it left from Chambery I am Odile Jouve You think I'm a tennis player? Well, you're wrong If the camera would pull back a little you'll see what I am Go on, pull back!

Now, you see!

Le No, this will do

I manage this tennis club Its members are from Grenoble and other regions nearby They all know each other here and I know everybody It all started six months ago You might say it goes back ten years... but it was actually six months ago In some stories, the main character is a house In this one, the principals are two neighbouring houses The first is the home of Bernard Coudray his wife Arlette and their son, Thomas Here they are, posing for a friend The second house... we'll get back to it later As you see, it was still unoccupied... when it all started

You okay, Thomas?

Can I help?

No, thanks So, you've rented the house?

No, I'm from the real estate agency Mr. Bauchard is the new tenant Philippe Bauchard Bernard Coudray, nice to meet you I must make a phone call I'm sorry, but the phone won't be connected till next week Use our phone May I?

Of course, come on!

If you run into any problems... be sure to call on us

Is he our new neighbor?

Yes He's moving in next week With his wife?

I don't know if he's married He wears a wedding ring Then, we'll have new neighbours Come to think of it we'll have to be careful No more love-making on the lawn

We can do it quietly No! No more outdoor sex Anyway, I always catch cold from the damp grass I hate it! Never again!

Wait for me, Thomas!

Can I carry the suitcase?


I'll put it down Yes, Gimme

Is he in your way?

Not at all Thomas, your pal's waiting for you They're both called Thomas, i I Come in, you probably know the house No We've never been inside You must meet my wife Come down!


You've got to fit your staff into the new set-up Mathilde, my wife... Mr and Mrs Coudray How do you do?

Bernard, hello Hello

I'll put the lights out

always leaves a trail for Thomas... like the Indians in Arizona Some Indian!

Damn it!

Did you wake him?


Their lights are out They go to bed earlier than we do The pilo He's not a pilot, he's an air controller Really?

Yes, he works at the Grenoble airport I steer boats and he guides planes Isn't his wife beautiful?

I think she's rather unusual Well, I think she doesn't belong here What do you mean?

Look, we live here because we love... the land, the trees, the natural environment

She just doesn't belong here!

Bernard, I know you're alone Can we talk?

We can talk anytime Of course, but I don't want to embarrass you Did you tell your wife about us?

Did you tell your husband?

No, but I will He trusts me, he's understanding He's wonderful man Good for you So long!

Don't hang up Wait... wait...

I'm waiting Have I changed much?

No, you're exactly the same!

You sound nasty I didn't move next door on purpose Philippe took the house on his own, to surprise me If I'd known beforehand I've have found a pretext to turn it down But since i I've got to go to work Wait... Tell me about yourself There's nothing to tell In case you need me... take my number No, I don't need anything


I'm hungry Didn't you eat your dinner?

Yes, I did So?

I'm still hungry Why sit in the dark?

I'll light up


You seem worried No, but I want to suggest something Le We could leave around the 8th I Thomas has to go to school Besides, they're auditing our books at the lab I've got my hands full No, i Don't eat the salmon Have an apple The salmon is for our guests What guests?

I invited our neighbours over for dinner tomorrow

What did you do that for?

The wife is very charming

I thought you'd be pleased!

Do you want me to put it off?

We can do it some other time It'

Never mind...



They're fighting No, they're making love... like mad!

So long

At what time will you be home?

At 8 Hello there!

Just getting up?

Remember to pick up the groceries Don't worry Don't forget!

I won't Your briefcase...

Bernard, your case!

Damn it! The door's locked I'm locked out!

I Go in the back way I can do it Okay, try it Slide over to the front Hurry up! Just press the red button Fine, come on out I'm late

Hurry up!

Remember the store!

Right! I've got the list!

Don't forget... you're coming over tonight!

Why does the sun circle around like that?

I wonder what'

Thomas! Is he bothering you?

Not at all Behave!

Mr Bauchard...

Just call me Philippe Philippe, won't you sit down?

No, I sit all day long Be back in a second

I wonder what'

He should be home by now Sometimes, they work overtime, but not tonight I believe your husband works on tankers Yes, he's an instructor on heavyweight tankers He trains the men on a small lake The captains take refresher courses on miniature models Miniatures, like toys?

Not exactly They're certainly not toys They're actually scale models Yes, one-fourth their normal size That'

Right Where on earth is he?

That must be him!

Bernard? Wha You could have let me know It'

He can't make dinner... he's stuck Try to get here in time for dessert Alright He asks you to excuse him We're expecting you Do your best!


I couldn't help overhearing you... and you were lying Tha Yes, I lied... but I don't make a habit of it Well, you were very convincing Now, I can blackmail you You may buy me off with a bourbon I

What will you have?

I don't know, I'll serve you first Do that, dear liar Wait... Let me explain A couple just moved in next door... and Arlette's already invited them over for dinner Don't you like them?

Tha I've got to get used to people I next week, they invite us It becomes a ritual What do they do? Are they nice?

He's an air controller He works at the Grenoble airport He's relaxed and phlegmatic... like an Englishman What about her?

I don't know... she's rather unpredictable I think she's the kind who likes to borrow trouble I don't know what you mean Look, if since you're not going home... you can share my grub Come on, i I'll just grab a cheese sandwich Over my dead body!

We'll share my veal stew But first, I've got to feed Benito

Did you hurt yourself?

Help me up

My prosthesis turns some men on!

A few days ago, a man followed me in the street for hours I tried to shake him but I couldn't Finally he spoke up I might have guessed: He was a fetishist!

I'm not surprised I saw a movie about that The heroine hated a man's arms around her she just couldn't stand it So the man had his arms cut off Both arms?

I'm not sure... One arm, or both In any case, he did it for love So did I, I did it for love For love?

I heard it was an accident!

It was a so-called accident

"An accidents" in quotes!

What did they say?

That you fell out of an 8th floor window...

The 7th floor... and by luck, you landed on a glass casing just below Right, it was in Nice and it was above a studio If not for that casing, I wouldn't be here today But i It happened 20 years ago at the time of the putsch in Algeria I might as well tell you the truth... because I like you I didn't fall out I jumped out of that window!

That took courage!

Nonsense! It'

I was simply desperate... in love and desperate He jilted me and went to New Caledonia Like an idiot, I kept on hoping... until I learned he's gotten married That did it!

What did he say when he heard what you'd done?

I made sure he'd never know It'


Men prefer not to know about these things They're so right!

By now, I feel the thing was tragic, but not fatal Like in the Piaf song:

What the hell! I've got no regrets!

Hey there! You're dreaming?

No, I'm listening

I'm glad you came I'm sorry that Bernard isn't here Never mind, we enjoyed it Right! Next time, we'll invite you Fine!


Do you mind if I walk along?

I want you to know we had a good time Your wife made a delicious meal Naturally, we talked about you It's your car outside?

Look, let'

That dinner party was her idea Maybe so... but we're neighbours now... in a tiny village So, le Besides, we're adults now, aren't we?

You've got a nice kid He looks like you You're surely happy Yes, I'm happy...

I mean I was, until you turned up That'

I'm not trying to make you feel guilty... but don't forget, I went through hell One week, you'd leave because you couldn't stand me... the next, you couldn't live without me So I worked up the guts to quit If I hadn't, I'd have gone crazy Now that we're both over it, can't we be friends?

I suppose you're right

I guess I resent hurting you as much as your hurting me I'm glad you're happy now That'

Next week, Philipe and I will invite you to dinner... with Arlette, of course Promise you won't let us down I promise I'll be there like Old Faithful

How about a kiss?


I want to ask for another favor:

Mention my name from time to time In the past, I could always tell... when you were feeling hostile... because you would never call me Mathilde You've probably forgotten...


Will you be all right?

See... You just look at the ball

There's your mother

I love beautiful hair, especially dark hair... there are too many blondes Where? Here, or in general?

Both, it' but mostly the commercials...

So, here you are!

Hello, Odile

Are you here for the day?

For the whole weekend I'll stay at the Pergola Are you crazy? Call the Pergola right now...

Cancel the room You'll stay here!


He's a gem I'd be lost without him I can't tell you all the things he's done for me Excuse me for not introducing you I forgot your name I'm Mathilde Bauchard We're Bernard's new neighbors Oh, of course! I've heard about you But you don't seem the kind to borrow trouble Why?


Roland! I wasn't sure because of the beard Besides, I'm a little older How long has it been? 4 years?

I think it was five...

This is great!

Mathilde, come here! This is Roland Duguet We were teammates in the Corsica rally Without him, I doubt... this is Mathilde

...Miss Madam! Hello Tha Congratulations!

We were about to... play a game You stay here with your friend I'll practice

A local publisher... Isn't it tough?

There are more advantages than drawbacks, Bauchard I was fed up with Paris Just call me Philippe Of course! I always tend to be formal Mathilde is beautiful but she's foreign... An Italian perhaps...

No, she's from the south of France As soon as we met...

I knew she'd be important to me I never sought out the ideal woman... or any woman, in fact But when I met Mathilde, she seemed like a promise In fact, I remember thinking:

Here is my last chance for happiness

Mrs. Jouve, please

I'm looking for Mrs. Jouve

Wha No, thanks, I'll be alright You seem upset Yes, I got a cable, a rotten cable... but I'll ignore it Can't I help?

No, never mind

If you need me, just call

Philippe tells me you do children's books He's always promoting me!

He says you're talented, but you lack confidence Too true! I wrote a few stories and... illustrated them, but it's amateurish I might be interested in an album What kind of drawings are they? Vignettes?

No, I use a margin and 2 or 3 point line I work with India ink I also use four colours for quadrichroms reproduction That'

Well, I worked for 3 months at Okapi's but that was years ago I quit because of illness...

There are new techniques now Techniques may change, but we can always use a good story I'd really like to see your work

Since you've got no partner, how about a game with me?

I can't, I think I hurt my wrist Simple as ever, I see



Don't forget: at 6 pm

I made a phone reservation Bernard Coudray Right, Number 18 She took the key Go on up To the first floor? Yes


This way...

Come along, sir

Look at this mess!

You had one just like this It was shorter You were smaller No, you idiot! The styles were shorter I bet you've forgotten our first meeting I have not It was at a children's party I came through the garden... and saw you inside through the window You were feeding the children and that did it:

I fell in love with you right then and there!

After which you declared your love by getting drunk You said, I'm not drunk, Mathilde I can prove it by my lucid reasoning You reasoned on and on... while I thought: Why doesn't he just kiss me?

Don't talk

Just caress my face Wait, wait...

I'm waiting


How could you?

Mind your own business, my friend I'm not your friend I'm your lover, your ex-lover Well, my love thought he had backgone but it was just a carapace... and when it cracked, he hated Mathilde You're right I truly hated you for a long time, but not anymore I've changed a lot Yes, you have changed it was ill-timed If we'd meet now, we'd make a go of it Well, we've just met I

not the same thing

You're even more beautiful now We were both too young, but now we understand each other I don't know I don't want to know

We were in love...

No, I loved you...

You were merely in love, tha Wha You'd say: I love you because I love you...

Well? Wasn't that a good reason?

Besides, you were a skirt-chaser, Monsieur

I was always intrigued by wonders they concealed And now?


You were tender with me So were you



I'm waiting

This looks like a battlefield Your hair's a mess I just wanted to see that gesture again The first time you did it, I thought:

If he asks me to sleep with him, I will

Le Why?

I resent other couples making love in our bed

Air-inter 323 Next to the right Parking B1 You're wanted downstairs

Mme... Jouve's taking a plane...

Will you give this to Mathilde?

What is it?

She knows Tell her she can reach me at the tennis club all week Odile's asked me to keep an eye on things I she's leaving town for a few days Take care of Mathilde I mean it: take good care of her!

I will

Have a good time in Paris I've got to get back to work Are you in charge of our take-off?

Spare us the fancy pirouettes!

I see you've allowed for the captions I bet you even estimated the copy space I admit I was tempted to...

Mr Roland...

That man at the bar... he's waiting for Madam Jouve I told him she's out of town He was here this morning...

I'll talk to him I'll be right back

He was snooping around when I came to work

I That man... Don't look at him He claims he came to see Odile Jouve... all the way from New Caledonia From New Caledonia? Really?

He claims she knew he was coming If she had, she wouldn't have left town There he goes!

Coffee, everybody?

Not for me, thanks Then, three coffees, Mathilde!

Come here

Tomorrow at 6 I've got to talk to you!

I said no!

Bernard, can you bring the cups

Here's the coffee Le

Wha Your present My present?

I meant to wait...

Your birthday?

No, i I What separation?

I'm leaving for 3 days Mathilde won't come She wants to move the furniture around God help us!

Why don't you open it?

I'm dying to...

I think I know...

We saw it in a shop Mathilde adored it... so we went in She tried it on and...

I realized I wouldn't dare... to wear it in public I it'

Not to look at, but...

Try it on...

Let them see it He's right Now?

Go on I'll help you Fine!


This way


When I first met her... she was as lovely as she is now, but she never laughed At most, a vague smile She had just divorced Divorced?

Yes, a blitz divorce after a blitz wedding



Does that happen often?

Only when a house looks unoccupied I

I Didn't I tell you?


I'm sure you won't mind... if she wears it while you're away?

She'll wear it where and when she wants to I'm not a Spanish husband Bernard, can you help me with the cups?

I'll see you tomorrow at 6

Where's the key for 18?

He got here first today

Wha Come in

Look Bernard... you wanted to talk Le Why not in the room?

I know you and I know myself And I dislike taking advantage... of Philippe's absence

We need some sugar

The sugar...

May I borrow it?

Wha I mean the one before Philippe You got married after leaving me?

Yes, I did it to get rid of you... to forget you I was so hurt I decided... to marry the first man who'd ask me He was an idiot You married an idiot Yes, a blissful idiot I sensed it was a mistake, but I had to do it I I'll marry the first girl who walks in I meant to divorce at once, but I'd met his whole family I was trapped It took me 6 months to get rid of him Then, I lived alone until two years ago... until Philippe he was determined... he was patient and gentle He waited until I trusted him So you yielded to his British charm

A few days ago, we talked of you I but I can't get over what he said:

Mathilde made a disastrous marriage to recover from an affair Now hear this: with a violent manic-depressive Am I the violent manic-depressive?

Is that how you talk of me?

He simplified He got things mixed up He simplified...

Look, Mathilde...

Le Look at me and listen:

Why not ditch all this and run away together?

I know we can be happy

8 years ago... Didn't you know that?

I was crazy about you but I'd rather have died than let you know

Why didn't you say so?

When I was expecting a baby, why didn't you want it?

You yourself said it was impossible... that it wasn't right... that we should wait!

I hoped you'd deny it You want a child!

But not with me, and you've got one now No, we'd better stop seeing each other

Take me home

Have you got a handkerchief?

Here Wait... I I don't care

Feeling better?

Take it back Now, i Thanks, my darling Am I hearing right?

Yes, you're still my darling even if you don't care My darling...

Look, Bernard...

I enjoy it, but i

Dinner's ready!

Blow on it if the soup is too hot Is it alright?

Quiet... I can't hear Hear what? It'

I'm cold I'll get a sweater I think it'

It must be upstairs

I'm taking 2 hours off Are you sick?

No, just get a man to replace me

Hello, you didn't reserve for today No, 18 is taken, but I've got another room OK, can I make a call?

I Where are you?

At the hotel The hotel?

Yes, our hotel How come?

I was driving by and I thought...

Listen, come on over!

No, I can't Yes, come on!

Remember what I said in the car Come anyway!

I really can't You can't, or you won't?

Neither You forget, we talked it all over I No, it'

We never have enough time How about tonight?

No, I can't tonight Is your husband back?

No, why?

Where were you last night?

Last night? Wait...

I went to see my publisher You expect me to believe you talked business all night?

It wasn't all night Don't kid me!

At 8:12, your lights were still on At 8:20, you drove off in your car...

At a quarter past midnight, the car...

I was showing Roland my designs Are you still there?

Answer me...

You can't be jealous! He's not interested in women I don't believe you You don't?

No, not a word of it I don't care I'm through with you You scare me!

I want you to explain

Why are you scared of me?

Never mind I was just upset Is that why you hung up on me?

I hung up because you insulted me You sounded like a cop talking to a thief Don't stay there, come in You're right... absolutely right With us, i Sit down No... I'm so tired I'd fall asleep

There's something else...

What is it? What did I do?

I hate lying Since we've been meeting, I'm living a lie I meant to tell Philippe everything... but I couldn't...

I couldn't do it either We can't keep this up Next week, I'm going away with Philippe

That too, it's why I couldn't go to the hotel Remember, you used to say to me and it always made me feel miserable Love affairs must have a beginning, a middle and an end It was true!

You're right...

you're absolutely right

From now on, I won't bother you We'll become friends again... like before Like before...

Before what?

I'd better go home now...

What if Arlette sees you?

I'll tell her that... that you fixed my freezer Yes... No, I'll tell her I'm feeling better... that I'm breathing again...

Here's my Thomas!


I'm cooking No cooking tonight!

Call the baby-sitter We're going to town A movie, dinner... Tonight, we celebrate!

A coffee and a sanka...

I'm really glad to see you relaxed...

I'm always relaxed Not for the past few weeks I felt you wanted to be by yourself In fact, I mean to visit my mother with Thomas... to give you a break Hell, no!

What I'd really like is to take time off... and go away with Thomas... on a real vacation

Look who's here

I hadn't been to Paris for years: I They're all hysterical

I want to face Madam Jouve I'm sorry... The chef is gone Then, a salad for two Tha He's nervous

Whenever he sees baggage... he just goes wild

I see you took the night off He saw a movie...

Which one?

The Walking Dead I I think I saw it...


For no reason!

His wife's an angel I'm not so sure:

The other guy, the young one, kills the husband No! The husband commits suicide... and makes it look like a murder Yes, I saw it! It'

He placed the knife above the door hinge...

Then, he stabbed himself The knife's in one room... the body's in the other...

He knew they'd suspect his wife Are you sure?

Of course! The knife is in one room... the body in the other...

He made it look like murder I Didn't you hear it?

Sure, I did He was asleep!

With his eyes open!

You need a drawing board... now that you're a pro Roland told me of a place Shall I get one?

No, I'll go myself If this little boy was blond, he'd look like Thomas Well, mine has dark hair Pictures are fascinating I prefers yours to mine I'm sorting them:

High school, graduation, college each one brings you closer to me

You already knew Bernard

Look You're right Tha This is the only time we met My cousin was wild about him!

Here she is Did he love her?

Why didn't they marry?

My cousin's father loved her He checked Bernard's background... and he told her: Do as you like but I know his kind:

Easy to get but hard to keep

You love me?

Will you always protect me?

Come, Thomas... A picture Mathilde, we want you in it...

Closer You see, we can be friends You thought we never could

Friends, may I have your attention I'm not going to make a speech... but I'll tell you the reason for this party In two hours, Mathilde and I are going away You already know that, but you don't know... it'

Since we married and settled here we haven't had time... for the ritual honeymoon... which will consecrate our marriage And that'

I Two love birds!

Their plane leaves at 6 I'm taking them to the airport

I'm beat!

Sit down No, you sit down...

Just lend me your knees You're radiant... but Bernard looks miserable I'd like one... of you and Philippe Where is he?

I'll go to get him

Never mind that, Nicole...

Come help me fix my dress

Need me?

No, Nicole will do it

Mathilde, a call for you!

There's nobody...

Yes, there's me!

We must talk... Come to the hotel... later Tha In my car then We must talk!

We've got nothing to say to each other We never have time to talk Not so loud!

I'll talk as loud as I want to!

I just ask you not to leave tonight... or to put off your trip for a while I'll tell you I must speak to you!

Let me go! You're crazy!

You... Go to hell!

Stop it! You're crazy Go away!

You're mad at me

You must hate me...

I'm not mad, I don't hate you

I know you've gone through hell... but I can't help being jealous... jealous of her, of you even of your suffering

And you might have trusted me enough let me know What could I tell you?

Arlette, our new neighbour... it's the dame who drove me nuts 8 years ago

I thought I was mad for her

At first, I thought I could forget her We'd see them so often A situation like that is bound to be difficult

I she got on my nerves I don't understand it I really don't

Come closer, please

Yes, it was Mathilde 8 years ago

We were so fond for each other It was all a disaster A disaster?

Yes, a disaster It seemed pointless to discuss it... and we won't I

Are you sick? What is it?

Wha Guess what...

You've improved in the past few weeks... with Roland's help

But you've got something else in mind Yes, we must make new living arrangements

I asked Mrs Jouve to help us find a flat in town That woman is god-send You know what she did last month?

A former lover of hers who lives in New Caledonia... came to see her in Grenoble Well, she spent three days in Paris... to avoid meeting him... so he wouldn't see how she's aged You're wrong!

You're all wrong!

That man was Odile's only love Because of him, she jumped out of a window 20 years ago She never let him know... that she's a cripple because of him

She's a remarkable woman but he never understood it Well, neither did I Men never understand love They're amateurs I love you... but I don't understand you I've never lied in my life: i but now, I'm living with a liar sleeping with a liar and I'm in love with a liar

Tell me... Wha What?

Wha Philippe Right, I'm Philippe But i Shall I tell you what name you say?


Do you remember me?

Sure, No.18 Could I rent the room by the month?

No, we only rent by the day We're reconverting as an apartment building Never mind...

Did you reverse it by mistake?

No, the drawing belong on the recto page We turn profiles towards the outside margin Do you mind?

I'm tired I love your handwriting If we do another book we'll print your handwriting If you like...

Excuse me It'

We've got a problem with the blood stain The drawing is very good... but the blood stain is too crude too violent for young readers I worked out a variant You're wrong!

I want the red to stand out If not, the drawing's meaningless Not really... i Look... Does this variant betray your meaning?


I'm tired

I must go I'll call you at home

Hello Thomas How are you?

I'm thirsty Can I go in?

Sure Coming? Yes

Can I have some water?

You want some? No

What a nice house, the kitchen, too Let me see your room

Where's your room?

Now nice!

Come see my toys!

What are you doing?

I like that picture...

What is it?


Why is it crying?

I What do you know about unhappiness?

Is this your first book?

Yes, i Never mind, i

Can you sign a copy for my niece?

I leafed through it I almost too good for children How can you say a thing like that?


Do you know how to use this?

Were you scared?

Look at you!

Go and wash up Just look at this mess!

Did you hear about Marcel?

I haven't seen him lately Did he mention his blonde neighbour?

Yes, he went for her in a big way At first! Now, he can't shake her I don't get it He keeps on meeting her in the elevator He'll have to move That'

Don't ever get involved with a neighbour

Excuse me, are you the lady who wrote this book?

Could you sign it for me, please?

Later, sir Thank you

Look, I'm in love Where's Mathilde?

Did you see Mathilde?

I'm looking for Mathilde

She's over there


Your husband is coming No...

This can't go on...

No, it can't You must eat You've lost weight I'm ugly...

I'm skinny...

I'm garbage I want to die

Wha Your husband will help you

I want to understand...

I've got to understand

Contrary to what people believe... a nervous breakdown is a real illness What' on the contrary!

If your wife wanted to, she'd go home in a week... but she prefers to be sick Right now, i What will you do?

I'll try to convince her it' to seek refuge in illness

By the way... had you noticed this coming on?

No, she collapsed... she simply collapsed!

True, she was disturbed Last week, we were downtown There was lots of traffic She kept on saying: Where are they all going?

I wanted to see you

I know i but I've got to talk to you about Mathilde I don't want to hear about her I'll tell you anyway I went to the clinic today She's in a very bad way I'm certain your visit would help You can talk to her, reason with her The trouble is I know her too well If anyone can help, i You're wrong, Bernard You're well over it, but she's not Please, don't insist

A man to see you Who?

He didn't say

Tha You can do as you like... but when I step into her room... the look on her face makes it clear It isn't me she's expecting

You want me to stay?

You want me to go?

You don't care either way

Ask me why I'm late Why are you late?

Philippe Bauchard came to see me He insisted that I visit Mathilde She's in clinic... In therapy Yes, I heard Is she any better?

Not really They prescribed shock treatment, but Philippe objected it He's right It helps one forget, but there are side effects

Was she pleased to see you?

I talked, but she wouldn't answer I promised Philippe I'd go back... but I doubt whether it will help If I were you, I'd go back In such cases, you never know what helps

She adored him When she heard he was going away... he said to himself:

I'll wait for him so I decided to kill my mother!


Tha Back to Mrs Jouve:

When she learned her lover had gotten married... she opened the window and jumped out Luckily, she landed on a glass roof just below that was 20 years ago And now, she's cripple Any comments?

I'd say the lady was lucky You call that luck?

Yes, it is She was lucky to stay alive She may fall in love again Life has more imagination than we have, you know One can love, or be loved more than once Only if one is loveable... and I'm not...

I'm just not I seem to turn people off What about your husband?

My husband loves me... but he's like you: he pretends he's listening He says: Turn over a new leaf But the leaf weighs a ton!

Nobody really cares

Sure, you're paid for it!

According to all those books I should fall in love with you... but you leave me cold

Something's wrong with the treatment

Never mind, don't talk Instead of playing nursemaid put new batteries in my radio They're over there

Time for your medicine

These pills are just wonderful This one makes you hungry This one makes you sleep I've even got one to cheer me up... if you take two, you become hilarious You should try one No, thanks I'm fine You think so?

How's Mrs. Jouve?

She's very well

These visits give you a pain, don't they?

Not at all, but...

See, i I'm glad you want to hear the news...

I only listen to the songs They tell the truth even those that sound silly besides, they're not silly You know what they say?

They say: Don't ever leave me Broken-hearted me I'm alone because I love you: or "Love as pride" or else You're nobody till somebody loves you

I've got to run now I'll be back

Don't bother... you don't have to You can tell them...

Mission accomplished The nut is back to normal

Did you find a house?

No, a flat in town I How's Mathilde?

Much better She's her old self

To Let

Well, this is the big day I saw the doctor We're all set Good! You brought the pumps My favorite shirtwaist! i I don't care, I prefer the white... because i You remembered my raincoat!

Shall I wear my straight skirt, or the pleated one?

I like the pleated one

Take me away Take me away, my love

I had to speak to you


The squad car arrived at dawn The ambulance was already there The attendants went in with two stretchers The coroner's report stated:

We found the bodies of a man and a woman The man was on top of the woman's body There was a bullet hole behind his ear... and traces of blood on his temple an identical wound on the woman's face... was made by the weapon in her hand The woman's legs were spread out Her skirt was raised above her thighs Her head was turned towards the window The deaths probably occurred around 5:30am From the position of the bodies, it may be assumed... the two had sex just prior to their death

I suspect that Mathilde and Bernard... won't be buried together If I had to select an epitaph for those two... it would be...

Neither with you, nor without you but I doubt whether I'll be asked