HAVE A GOOD TIME
You seem as eager to meet me on the battlefield...
...as you once did in the bedroom, Hippolyta.
I only hope you prove more skilled in this arena, Ares.
You need not worry for me.
This carnage feeds my soul.
Every arrow shot and life wasted strengthens me...
...so that not even a woman scorned will save mankind from my wrath.
For you may be the queen of the Amazons, but I am the god of war.
You are most greedy on the battlefield, Artemis.
My sword is thirsty, Persephone.
I intend she gets her fill.
As a rock on the seashore he standeth firm.
The dashing of the waves disturbeth him not.
In danger, the courage of his heart sustaineth him.
And the steadiness of his mind beareth him out.
I assure you, Alexa, a sharp blade and a strong arm will do more good...
...than a quote from some philosopher.
I do not belong on this killing field, sister.
I am no warrior.
That you are not.
But if you cannot fight like an Amazon, you will at least die like one.
You truly are hopeless, aren't you, little one?
She now wears her courage.
Where is yours, Alexa?
Listen to the song of death Thrax plays.
Is he not a virtuoso?
I will forever be grateful to you for this child you gave me.
I gave you nothing.
You forced him upon me like a curse.
Stay away from him, Hippolyta. Stay away.
He is your flesh and blood too.
Allow me to reunite you with your son in Tartarus.
Stay out of this, Zeus.
You will spare my son's life.
How dare you ask such a thing?
Look on this battlefield...
...stained red with the blood of my sisters whom he enslaved for decades.
Women who have long been loyal servants to you.
I am only carrying out the death sentence he signed the day he betrayed me.
Do not challenge me, child.
My dear Hippolyta.
Do not let my husband anger you.
He can be a stubborn fool sometimes.
Even so, we must respect his wishes.
Ares will be allowed to live...
...yet shall not go unpunished.
You will keep him as your prisoner.
These bands will prevent him from drawing upon the psychic energies of war...
...that give him his power...
...rendering him, in effect, mortal.
They can only be removed by another god.
But my people, Hera, they have lost so much.
Our men, our homes and now our chance for retribution.
Yes, but as I gave you the strength to deliver yourselves from slavery...
...I shall now give you a new beginning.
A new home on an island paradise...
...where your people will be shielded from the chaotic world of man, There, you will be protected from the ravages of time...
...and allowed to create a utopia...
...that you might reclaim your purity of spirit,
And then the time will come when your ancient prayer for a child...
...one not created through unholy union, will finally be answered,
You know, Artemis, I found myself saying a little prayer for you last night.
Did you, Diana? How kind?
Yes, I prayed that Apollo would inspire you...
...with a strategy that might end your rather long string of defeats at my hand.
Obviously I'm not praying hard enough.
If you were not the queen's daughter.
Well done, Diana.
But be kind to Artemis.
Believe it or not, there was a time when she was the fiercest warrior among us.
And still would be given the chance in a real battle.
Then forgive me, Artemis, if I am grateful that you will never be afforded that chance.
If that is indeed true, Mother, then what is the point of all this training?
That is, other than to humble Artemis from time to time.
We train because we must always remain vigilant, Diana.
I once let my guard down and paid a terrible price.
But, my queen...
...letting down our guard is precisely what we must do.
And now, before yet another century passes...
...is the time to reengage ourselves with the old world.
Even if only to add some new material to our library.
Perhaps Alexa's right.
Is it not possible man's world has changed for the better?
Follow me, child.
It is only within this prison, Diana...
...that you can glimpse the true darkness that lurks in the hearts of all men.
Ares, the god of war.
Do not fear.
She is right to be scared, Hippolyta.
You are a fool if you think you can hold me forever.
I am more than a god.
I am a force of nature.
You are but breath and shadow.
This, Diana, is why we can never reunite with the outside world.
It is better if you can accept the nature of man as it is.
Wicked, disloyal and above all, untrustworthy.
So we ever decide what this mission's pucker factor was?
Well, we're in the airspace of an unfriendly...
...who'd love the press that would come with shooting Yankees, I'd say we're dealing with a pucker factor of eight. Maybe eight and a half.
PF measures the severity of sphincter constriction in times of peril, Charming.
Now, any further schooling you might need, I'm happy to take you under my wing.
Don't fall for it, rook.
Zipper here is the kind of guy mothers warn their daughters about.
Bandit, 6 o'clock.
You sure picked a hell of a first mission, rook. Fangs up.
There appears to be some activity in the skies above us.
It's strange, Artemis.
This silver mirror forged by Hephaestus...
...has kept us hidden away from the outside world for centuries now.
And yet it's only when I gaze through its frame...
...that I feel any connection to our past lives...
...as if once again that world is close enough to touch.
For Gaea's sake, my queen, have you lost your mind?
Hey, rook, it would be appreciated if you could help me pick this tail, Rook, you copy?
Do you copy?
Damn it, PF just hit 10,
Perhaps you'd be better served by a less restless mare, princess.
She'll be fine once I run it out of her.
She's just been cooped up in the stable too long.
I know just how you feel. We comb you. We feed you till you're full.
Give you everything you could possibly need, and yet all you want is to run free, isn't it?
Off to explore?
I doubt there's an inch of this island left for me to explore.
Care to join me?
Thank you but you know I prefer the excitement of a good book.
Two bandits on your tail, Slick, I'll intercept him, Negative on the intercept, trooper, You got your own plane pal to deal with,
You're dead gone,
Radio command, this is Zipper, do you read?
I'm experiencing catastrophic engine failure, punching out.
What the...? Where did the landing strip come from?
This is too good to be true.
And it is.
Is it true, Artemis? A man on the island?
Go home, princess. That is an order.
I'll take it under advisement.
An angel. Surrender. You cannot escape.
Oh, I don't know about that, angel.
I've made a hobby out of fleeing chasing women.
...I think I like you.
Wow, haven't had this dream since I was 13.
Aah. You will speak only when spoken to.
That's enough, Artemis.
Welcome to Themyscira.
We are the Amazons.
We live simple lives, and we wish to keep it that way.
There are a few questions we'd like to ask you.
Sorry, ma'am, soldiers don't talk.
Hey, I'm into the kinky stuff too, but if you think...
...that's gonna make me more cooperative...
United States Air Force. Colonel Steven Rockwell Trevor.
This lasso was designed to bypass the untrustworthy nature of man.
You cannot resist its powers.
What interest does your government have in our island?
My government is unaware of the existence of your island.
I'm only here because my plane was damaged.
I don't have to put up with this crap.
We are unfamiliar with this particular idiom.
What does crap mean?
No, forget I even said it.
It's another word for excrement.
You happy now, lady?
What did he say?
Oh, my goodness. I can't believe this.
What did he say?
See, my child? Is it not as I've always said?
Here the true nature of man is laid bare.
What other depraved thoughts must you be thinking?
God, your daughter's got a nice rack.
Shall I kill him now, my queen?
This pilot poses no threat to our people.
Therefore, it is our duty to see him safely returned to the outside world.
I wanna be the one to take him back, Mother.
You do not have the experience necessary to lead such an expedition.
As in ancient times...
...a contest will determine our emissary to the outside world.
Artemis, make the arrangements.
This is not fair, Mother.
I will always lack necessary experience unless given the opportunity.
Diana, you may resent my decisions but there are evils in this world...
...that I, as a mother, am compelled to protect you against.
I am a woman now. I no longer need your protection.
If the princess will not be participating in the contest...
...perhaps she can join me on guard duty.
It appears you are going to be busy.
Alexa, are you covering Persephone's guard duty?
I am covering yours.
Now, go, the contest will begin shortly.
I appreciate the gesture...
...but you know that's the last place my mother will allow me to show my face.
Then perhaps you should hide it under a combat helmet.
You are my heart, sister.
Where is the princess?
Why does she not understand her mother knows what is best for her?
The heart wants what the heart wants, even that which is worst for it.
This contest will determine the most capable among you...
...to be our emissary to the outside world.
Fight with honor.
So the queen's kid, you know, the hot chick?
Yeah, her. So, what's her deal?
Her deal is that I will personally castrate you...
...if you come within five yards of her.
Perhaps the arrival of this man will bring forth a new era for the Amazons.
And perhaps it will only bring a return to darker times.
That is fear talking, sister.
There's a quote in which I find the courage to face the unknown.
As a rock on the seashore, he standeth firm.
"And the dashing of the waves disturbeth him not. "
In the instant...
Yes, I know the quote well.
It has aided me much in recent days.
Shall I finish it?
In the instant of danger, the courage of his heart...
...sustaineth him and the steadiness of his mind beareth him out.
It's as you said.
The heart wants what the heart wants...
...even that which is worst for it.
A century's long courtship finally culminated in a kiss.
I find my joy is only tempered by the fact that Diana lives.
Still, our destruction has worked. Come.
We have a tie which must be broken.
She who is left standing after this final event...
...will be the victor.
You fought with honor and intelligence.
The gods go with you with the gifts I'm about to bestow.
As is the custom...
...our emissary will don the colors of the foreign nation...
...as a sign of respect and peace.
...formed from shards of Zeus' shield by Hephaestus himself.
Finally, the Lasso of Truth...
...bequeathed to us by the goddess Hestia...
...sent here by Eros from Mount Olympus.
Now reveal yourself, warrior...
...so that we may fully honor you.
I have no doubt you will serve us well...
Ares has escaped.
My sister has failed in her duties to the Amazons.
It is Persephone who has failed us.
It seems, daughter, your journey will have a second purpose.
I am ready, Mother. Then go now.
Follow the path of misery, of death and destruction and you will find Ares.
May Gaea be with you, Diana.
All of Themyscira...
...all of the world depends on you.
We should not have let her go. I don't see how we could've stopped her.
I could have shot her in the leg. Not near an artery, of course.
You are the soul of thoughtfulness, Artemis.
Welcome to New York, angel.
I think you're gonna like it.
Hey, wait a minute.
What is going...? Look at that lady. What is it...?
You can't catch me. Children.
Steve, I've never seen children before. I'm...
What's wrong, little one?
They won't let me play pirates with them.
And why not?
Because I'm the girl, and they need someone to save.
I don't even know how to sword fight.
Neither do they.
In battle, they'd be slaughtered instantly.
Would you like me to teach you how to sword fight?
They're using the horizontal cut, but in close like they are...
...the thrust is a better move as it's more likely to cause real injury...
...and less likely to be blocked by your opponent.
Do you understand? Uh-huh.
Now go. Unleash hell.
That was sweet. Teaching her to disembowel her playmates like that.
Now we part ways, Steve Trevor. I have work to do.
Hold on, maybe I can help.
My job allows me access to sophisticated surveillance technology.
It might help your search.
I will see what your technology has to offer.
What is she wearing? Wow.
First, let's get you into something that won't get me arrested for solicitation.
Everyone said you were dead.
I even took a long lunch to buy this cute little number for your funeral.
Now, when am I gonna get to wear it?
I hear General Cookmeyer's health is failing.
Etta Candy, this is Diana. She's part of the team that, uh, rescued me.
I'm so glad you're here, Stevie.
Would you mind moving this heavy table for little old me?
It's holding my favorite pen hostage.
I'm sorry, Etta Candy, but what's wrong with you?
You appear to be strong and in good health, yet you can't move that table by yourself.
I was wondering if there was something wrong with you.
Well, no one's complained yet.
Is this what you were looking for?
We have some work to do on the computers.
I'll see you later, Etta.
The advanced brainwashing...
...that has been perpetuated upon the females of your culture.
Raised from birth to believe they're not strong enough to compete with the boys.
And then as adults, taught to trade on their very femininity.
How about we stay focused on that other social evil for now?
God of war, remember?
Tell me, what exactly are we up against with this guy?
Imagine a god whose sole mission is to propagate terror...
...to incite eternal war and fan the flames of hate.
A god who won't stop until the Earth's populous...
...Amazon and outsider alike, lies murdered in a battlefield grave.
You smell good.
Must you flirt? It's only natural.
Now, this is interesting. Right around the time of his escape...
...the number of violent incidents increased dramatically in the area.
A car bomb in Turkey, a workplace shooting in Greece...
...a farmer kills his family in Crete.
Proximity to Ares literally inspires acts of rage...
...in those gripped by fear and anger.
This might be the break we need.
Eventually a pattern will form that will allow us to pinpoint his exact location.
So for now, we wait.
You know, since this could be the last time you get to see the outside world...
...maybe you should take in sights before you return to Chastity Belt Island.
What did you have in mind?
I hope this is okay.
So tell me, what do you think about man in the outside world so far?
I mean, I'm not so bad, am I?
So now it's my turn to be interrogated? Well, I'll never tell.
You will, because while the Amazons have the truth lasso, I've got tequila.
...to different cultures finding common ground.
A most noble endeavor.
That's me, angel. Noble.
Your mother and Ares? Really?
The whole god of war thing didn't raise any red flags?
I guess it's not surprising.
Women always go for the bad boy.
If the god of dependability was trying to get her...
...she'd be like, "You're really sweet, but I just think of you as a friend. "
God of war hits on her, it's all, "Whoo. You're cute. "
You think that's bad?
Zeus seduced one of my mom's friends by turning into a swan.
A swan. True story.
As long as I can remember, I've had dreams of being the one...
...who reunited Themyscira with the outside world.
Of being that bridge.
It just feels like so much depends on me right now.
Uh-huh. Right, I get that. Totally.
How are you feeling? Fine.
Which is why the concept of hubris is such a staple of the Greek tragedies.
Ever read Oedipus Rex?
Pretty messed up, huh?
God, you're pretty.
Hey, hey, what did I do?
It's all true, isn't it, Steve?
Everything my mother warned me about man's world is true.
She even told me you'd try to seduce me...
...and I, like a fool, told her, "For now, let us only expect the best from the pilot. "
You tried to get me drunk.
As if you could outdrink an Amazon, you lightweight.
Yes, I knew exactly what you were trying to do.
And don't use that language around me.
Sorry to bother you, but we're collecting stupidity fines.
Well, bring your date into a neighborhood this dangerous this late?
Pretty fricking stupid.
Is this man robbing us, Steve?
Here, there's a gift certificate to the Blue Crab in there too. Enjoy.
Give him nothing.
The wallet. No, we're going to hold on to that.
But there is something I want from you. An apology.
For contributing to my present disillusionment with men in general.
Can you believe this crazy chick?
I'm not gonna ask again. The wallet.
Diana, he's got a gun.
Someone could get hurt.
Maybe I want someone to get hurt.
Well? Uh, uh...
That was kind of hot.
I got it this time.
Buddy, go home...
An agent of Ares, I presume.
I don't think he's from the Lower East Side.
I am Deimos.
I was sent to kill the Amazon who returned the pilot.
Ares will be most pleased when I bring back your remains.
Save your energy. You're not going to break the lasso.
So wanna tell me where Ares is?
No, no, I will not betray my master.
Trust me, buddy, you don't have a choice. Might as well answer the question.
I answer only to Ares.
What's this? The symbol of Tartarus.
The Greek underworld.
Oh, man. She was just like a gift from the god.
All the right reasons.
The cult of Ares...
...they existed in ancient times...
...and it seems they've been waiting patiently for his return.
All right, see you later. So long.
So, what happens after this?
After you take down Ares?
I return to Themyscira...
...for good, I suppose.
What about all that stuff about bringing our two worlds together?
Dreams of a naive girl.
Soon, my love, these bands will be but a memory...
...and you will be free again to summon the dark army...
...that will allow us to rule over this world together.
You must thank your uncle for agreeing to make this all possible.
My uncle has agreed to nothing.
In fact, I'd be quite surprised if that miserable fool helps us at all.
But there is no one else to turn to.
What if he does not remove the bands?
I can be very persuasive when I need to be.
I convinced you to turn your back on your people, didn't I?
Get over it. What's he waiting for?
The gates are sealed.
He planned his escape to coincide with the Blood Moon...
...the one night of the year the gates can be opened.
But to do that, a sacrifice must be made to Hades.
Now, Persephone, I must call upon your aid once again.
How is it I can serve you?
Your dagger, please.
Of course, my king.
It is time.
No, no, please, no.
It's over, Ares.
I'm taking you back to Themyscira.
On the bright side, you'll have the company of a new cellmate.
Surely you don't think a god can be so easily defeated, do you?
It's already done.
Whatever happens, stop Ares from opening the gates.
No problem, angel. Leave it to me.
God help us all.
Easy, Cerberus. You remember me, don't you?
I'm here to see your master.
Fine. She can stay here.
You're early, nephew.
Not that I don't cherish your company, my dear uncle...
...but I'm afraid I'm only visiting today.
You are here for a favor. I am.
Perhaps then you can enlighten me...
...as to why you think I would remove your bands.
Is it because I've longed for a return of your power-crazed ways?
Or maybe, I wish to see you act again...
...without regard for your divine brothers and sisters.
Or is it simply because I am so easily manipulated...
...and like a dog, will obey any command?
It is simplicity itself.
Once these bands are removed, I will wage a war against humanity...
...the likes of which this world has never seen.
Its populace will choke on death.
And you will be flooded with more servants to glorify you...
...than you will possibly know what to do with.
Very well. I will accommodate your request.
But I must confess.
Upon your escape from Themyscira...
...your father came to me. He asked...
Nay, begged me not to help you. Did he?
Among his fears was that your revitalized presence...
...might threaten the delicate power balance on Olympus.
I'm not surprised that he who sanctioned his own son's unjust bondage...
...would put politics above family.
Excuse me one moment. Slave!
That a father would treat his own son in such a way fills me with sadness.
Thrax, my son.
Is everything all right, dear nephew?
The blood seems to have rushed from your face.
Yes. Of course.
Where are my manners?
Don't just stand there, you pathetic twit. Attend to our guest.
No further hospitality on your part is required.
You've been a most magnanimous host.
And you've waited too long for this moment.
Let's not extend it another second.
I shall never be able to repay your gesture, dear uncle.
And you will never need to.
Like you, I cherish family.
So to assist you in this way...
...well, it brings me unconscionable amounts of joy.
You're lucky to be alive, so just conserve your energy and rest.
Did you...? Did you stop Ares?
No, I didn't.
I couldn't. What?
I had to save you. Ow.
I didn't need you to save me. I needed you to stop Ares.
Hey, if it weren't for me, you wouldn't be here right now.
I'm an Amazon, Steve. We're prepared from birth to give our lives in battle.
I knew what the consequences were going in to this mission.
You would have acted differently, if I were a man.
Oh, playing the card again, are you?
You know what? I've had just about enough...
...of listening to you go on about how terrible men are.
Does the truth hurt, Steve?
News flash: The Amazons ain't so perfect either.
You act brave, but cutting yourselves off from the world was cowardly.
Not to mention stupid.
Like less communication between men and women is what the world needed.
How dare you? No! I'm not done.
You met your first man, what, like 15 minutes ago.
And you think you have us all figured out.
Well, I'm sorry, but not everything a man does...
...is to further some misogynistic agenda.
We don't hold doors open or pull out chairs for women...
...because we're trying to keep you down.
I didn't save you because I thought you were some damsel in distress.
I saved you because...
Because I care about you, Diana.
And I'm not gonna abandon a friend in need, man or woman.
You should have saved the world instead of me.
Maybe I figured the world's not worth saving if you're not in it.
Ow! You crazy Amazonian dragon lady.
There's work to be done.
By the way, you're starting to sound like a woman.
You've waited patiently, my friends...
...but the time has come once again to spread my gospel of death.
Now, let the natural state of mistrust and betrayal...
...run through the soul of every man...
...until I may walk across the earth on the backs of 5 billion corpses.
Sorry I reacted the way I did at the hospital.
I'm sorry too. Since we've met...
...I don't think I've done the best job of representing the masculine ideal.
The truth is, I'm really not such a pig.
No, that's not the truth. I am a pig.
A womanizer. Been one for a long time now.
Sometimes I think it's all because I don't wanna be hurt.
Well, not again.
This macho bravado, it's all a facade.
Wait, why am I telling you this?
God, I hope you Amazons can't mass produce this thing.
They're messing with Lincoln.
Nobody messes with Lincoln.
Mr. President, we still don't know what those things on our front lawn are.
Every government we have relations with...
...has called to assure us they aren't behind this.
Well, someone has to pay for this.
Shall we? Mother tells me you're a terrific dancer.
Darn. Apparently someone wants to cut in.
You're not going to conquer man, Ares.
The Amazons will never let you.
Now, who said I was trying to conquer man?
War is only the vehicle that allows my soul to feed...
...on the psychic energy of fear, discord and hate.
And already this modern world has given me the kind of power I've never known.
Power that will allow me to conquer not man...
...but the very gods of Olympus.
Now, hold still.
I wish to repay the kindness your mother once showed my son.
I must confess, my queen.
It feels like the first day of school.
And yet you could not find a bigger sword, Artemis?
Sword? This is but my dagger.
Tear them apart.
Looks like we'll have that dance after all.
Sir, we have intelligence...
...that an island has appeared out of nowhere in the Aegean Sea.
If we're dealing with mystical forces, this could be where they're from.
Our military advisers are suggesting we strike, and strike hard...
...before they have a chance to unleash who knows what else on us.
How do you expect to defeat Zeus, if you can't even beat a girl?
You're optimistic, if you think I've reached the height of my powers.
You see, since I've been gone...
...man has created a weapon of such awesome destructive force...
...that their use of only one of these weapons...
...feeds me with the psychic energy of a thousand wars.
How will you stop me now that my powers rival that of any god?
I am as strong as Hercules.
As fast as Hermes.
And now, like Hades, I wield dominion over the dead...
...which allows me to unleash my own worst curse upon your people.
Amazon dead, I command you to come to your lord.
Slaughter your sisters.
Alexa, you bring yet more disgrace to our family.
This time I will ensure that you stay dead.
Now you fight without fear.
What demon language are you babbling?
You're trying to tell me something, aren't you?
An ancient incantation to release one from another's unnatural control.
Only I could not administer it to myself.
And from where did you learn that little bit of magic?
A book of mysticism written by some dead philosopher.
You always did live in books, didn't you?
But in death I am an Amazon.
May we meet again in a better place, sister.
Your army continues to dwindle.
As does yours.
But the difference is I no longer need an army.
Okay, one chance to shoot this guy down.
Come on. What's wrong? Why isn't anything happening?
No. No. No!
Of course, invisible missiles. Hardy flipping har.
Have you not brought enough death and misery upon us?
I'm sorry, my queen. I never meant to fall in love.
Love? The Amazons are warriors.
You turned your back on your sisters.
No, it is you who did that when you turned your back on mankind.
You were given a life of peace and beauty.
And denied one of families and children.
Yes, Hippolyta, the Amazons are warriors...
...but we are women too.
Did your mother not warn you this is how it would turn out?
That you would suffer at the wicked...
...hands of man?
You're no man.
Not the kind I've come to know.
Then you've learned nothing, have you?
Well, I have learned one thing.
It's not polite to hit a lady.
Mr. President, the threat has been neutralized.
It seems by a group of armored supermodels.
A tragedy, A terrible, terrible tragedy, How it weighs on my heart to see you like this.
When my brother asked me not to remove your bands...
...he said I was only dooming you...
...that he could not save you from yourself yet again.
Perhaps I should have listened.
Are you reading, dear sister?
I am trying, my queen, but it is fiercely boring.
So much has changed in recent days.
She misses the outside world.
She misses him.
Her task was completed.
She had to return.
What is this?
It is your mission.
It is why Hera delivered you to us in the first place.
It is time again to open the lines of communication between man and woman.
Something I should have done a long time ago.
And you, my daughter, will serve as our ambassador.
But there is one condition.
You must visit home often.
I lift cars. I can lift car-door handles.
We talked about this, angel.
I know. Sorry.
Oh, thank you, Stevie. You're such a gentleman.
I guess I'll see you at your apartment.
Call if you're gonna be late. I don't want dinner getting cold.